The HUSH Series: (HUSH, HUSHED and JANE.)

by Sandra Raine

  “Fuck you, Tanya!” Josh spat, also swigging from his bottle of beer.

  "Oh." I groaned, somewhat surprised, somewhat disappointed as I was actually anticipating to meet some cool guys not a pair of horny, beer guzzling assholes. And boy was I way the fuck off. But I guess the part that really got to me was Justin and Josh having gotten extremely friendly with me, and Dominic not doing a damn thing to set them straight 'cause he was too damn occupied on trying to make himself appear lucky rather than gentlemanly.

  I needed some fresh air. The room was starting to spin again. And I was starting to feel nauseated.

  "I need to use the bathroom," I said dryly to Tanya the second Dominic, Justin and Josh shifted the conversation to Dominic's recent football game. Tanya obliged, and we headed upstairs.

  After we cleared the stairs to the second floor which seemed to take forever especially with all the 'excuse us' and 'sorry ‘bout that' – compliments of all the bumping Tanya and I did into the other party-goers - Tanya was finally able to lead me into one of the bathrooms which was in one of the bedrooms. And instead of leading me gently toward the direction of the bathroom, Tanya instead tugged me, the way mother's tugged their kids when they were being difficult. And Tanya must’ve felt like I was being one of those difficult kids, but it was only ‘cause I was freaking drunk! So staggering and giggling was only expected!

  "Hurry up!" Tanya then bitched ‘cause she wanted to head back down to the party a.s.a.p! I said nothing and slammed the door in her face.

  I stared at myself in the mirror for what seemed like hours. Aside from looking drunk I also looked high - my pupils were dilated and my face was flustered. I figured it was either my nerves or the alcohol? I mean, it was my very first time drinking.

  I leaned over the sink and splashed some water on both my cheeks to cool myself down. I even tried drinking some of it to rid the bitter taste from my mouth but the water only seemed to intensify my drunkenness 'cause all of a sudden the room started to spin again, and I mean, really spin that soon my eyes started to close. . .And then there was a sudden knock at the door which irked the heck out of me 'cause Tanya just didn't seem to have any patience for me and that alone was starting to bug the fuck out of me!

  "Gosh darn it, Tanya!" I bitched, jerking the door open. Right then and there my heart had skipped a massive beat after I saw that it wasn't Tanya I was bitching at but her cousin Justin.

  "You alright, baby?" he then asked beneath a wide tooth grin that literally sent chills up and down my spine. I anxiously glanced around Justin's brawny shoulder and noticed that Tanya was nowhere in the room. Then it occurred to me that I was in deep, deep trouble.

  "I. . .um. . .I have to. . .to go." I mumbled, and quite incoherently.

  "No you don't, Baby!" Justin toyed, sweeping up my arm roughly as I attempted to slink around him.

  "What do you want from me?" I pleaded suddenly beneath a trembling lip. I was trying hard not to break down and cry like a little girl but I could feel my confidence failing me drastically.

  Justin said nothing. He just grinned and ushered me toward the bed. A wave of fear then swept over me. Then the room spun hard with me falling on the bed and Justin falling right on top of me.

  Chapter 7

  I didn't know how long I had been passed out for?

  But what I did know, after I finally came to, was that my dilemma had gotten much more serious ‘cause to my absolute horror it wasn’t Justin I had woken up to huffing and puffing and thrusting away on me. . .it was actually another guy.

  Then, as I was just a second away from fighting for my dignity, I heard a voice from somewhere amidst the semi-darkness complain: "Fuck, dude, hurry up! You're takin' too fuckin' long!"

  OH-MY-GOD! my eyes shockingly lit up when I realized that it just wasn’t one guy in the room but two. But by the time I could ingest what was happening to me, happening to my body, the guy fucking me gave one last hardened thrust before pulling out and ejaculating all over my stomach. And just as he was in the throes of jumping off of me, the other guy then took his turn and jumped on top of me not leaving any opportunity for me to get up and run.

  "No! No! NO!" I heard myself cry out the second the other guy attempted to force himself on me. But as I struggled to sit up to fight the guy off, the guy got angry with me and backhanded me.

  "You bitch!" The guy then spat in a state of arguable disgust before he grabbed a stern hold of my body and flipped me over onto my stomach where he then entered me brutally from behind forcing me to scream. And when I made an attempt to scream a second time, the guy shoved my face into the pillow and continued to fuck me even though I was on the verge of suffocating. Between the alcohol, the rape and the suffocation, I ended up passing out again.

  When I finally came to for the second time, I didn't know what time it was or if I was still in the same bedroom? All I knew was that I was completely naked and my head was throbbing and the room was no longer spinning. I immediately tried to sit up, to gather some kind of recollection that is until the bedroom door unexpectedly opened and Dominic walked in had I suddenly remembered what had happened to me.

  In spite of the excessive pain burning in my vagina and throbbing in my rectum, I quickly forced myself to sit up toward the edge of the bed, tugging the dirty bedspread to my body. I was trembling, and feeling beyond despaired while tears of shame and fear and humiliation streamed down the sides of my face 'cause I didn't know what Dominic was going to do or say or take to how I looked ‘cause from what I could see Dominic did not look the least bit concerned about my appearance particularly when he settled his beer bottle onto the night stand amidst the sea of empty and semi-emptied beer bottles and a couple of framed pictures of some guy and girl embracing and smiling - I assumed I was in a frat guy's bedroom.

  Dominic, much to my disappointment, did not say anything. Instead he lifted my chin and surveyed my appearance with minimal disgust. I mean, it was as if this was exactly the way he intended to find me looking. My face however, and what I believed Dominic could see, appeared dirty and sticky while my right cheek and lower lip felt sore. I meant to open my mouth and explain to Dominic what had happened with his cousin Justin and a couple of other guys but he had already let go of my chin.

  "Get dressed. We gotta go." he said picking up his beer and walking out of the bedroom.

  I couldn't find my dress for the minute I scrambled naked around the room in one high heel. But after I found my dress, along with my other high heel, I had no choice but to wear it commando ‘cause both my bra and panties were literally missing.

  I scurried into the bathroom and staggered to the mirror and looked at myself. And to my disgust I looked like I had been partying all night: My hair was tousled and flat. My eyes looked dazed and confused, and my make-up was a total mess particularly the mascara. I quickly grabbed some toilet paper, damped it with water and wiped away the black gunk from underneath my eyes.

  Dominic was standing out in the hall talking to a few guys when I rushed out of the bedroom. A sudden wave of panic had flushed over me 'cause I had recognized one of the two guys who raped me; I couldn’t find a rock big enough to crawl under.

  The conversation between Dominic and the guys eventually broke with one guy handing Dominic a stack of money, at the same time, thanking him for the "entertainment".

  At first I didn't know what these guys meant by that remark, and I wasn't sure if I really wanted to know. All I knew for the moment was that I so desperately wanted to go home, to the security of my family but I feared telling Dominic 'cause he already had one hand wrapped around my arm and he looked mildly upset.

  The house was empty of party-goers except for the bartender and Dominic's cousins. The three were in conversation when Dominic and I touched down from the stairs. Justin and Josh quickly shook hands with the bartender before following Dominic and me just as we were making our way out of the house.

  Dominic opened the back passenger’s door to the Bentley and shoved me
toward the middle of the seat with Justin and Josh both taking a seat opposite of me. Tanya was already in the front passenger's seat looking like a stiff; sitting eerily still and barely breathing. I choked back my fear and clutched my purse tightly to my chest.

  "Ta. . .Tanya?" my voice cracked as I searched her demeanor for a reason, an explanation for what had just happened to me.

  "Shut up, Jane." Tanya then scowled the least bit concerned over my dilemma.

  I opened my mouth to say something blunt about her snubbing on me but the driver's side door opened with Dominic sliding into the driver's seat. I unnervingly stiffened in my seat with Josh staring at me from the corner of his eye and Justin looking out the window, chugging down another beer - it was three in the morning when Dominic threw the gear into drive.

  No one spoke on the drive back to Paradise Valley nor had I anticipated Dominic tugging Justin and Josh along particularly as we neared our neighborhood – as I thought they were merely hitching a ride - which made me extremely nervous but nowhere near as terrified the second Dominic pulled his father’s Bentley onto the driveway.

  As soon as Dominic cut the engine to the Bentley, all doors simultaneously opened and everyone got off except for me - I was still glued to my seat, to afraid and much to paralyzed to move until Dominic stuck his head inside the Bentley and ordered me to get off. And instead of rushing off the car I instead took my time. But I think it was my timing that tried Dominic's patience 'cause he reached in to the car and grabbed my arm and yanked me hard out of my seat. Then after, as I staggered to my feet to get a better grasp on my emotions which were all over the place, Dominic unexpectedly shoved me up against the car and glared at me for a moment. I had sensed that Dominic wasn't too pleased on the way I looked - which was nowhere in comparison to when I first left his house. I could clearly see now what I looked like through Dominic’s eyes, and the reflection staring back at me not only repulsed me, I felt it repulsed him too.

  As sure as I was about Dominic saying something or doing something to ease the bitter tension that settled between us since after the party, Dominic instead took firm hold of my arm again and led me around the front of the Bentley where I faced Tanya, Justin and Josh beneath the bitter chill of silence nipping all around us. And I couldn't help but feeling embarrassed 'cause my nipples were semi-erect behind my tight dress and I wasn't wearing any panties; suddenly I felt like a slut and I yearned to go home. I must've sub-consciously glanced at my car right as I pondered on going home which prompted Dominic on the defensive.

  "You looking to leave?" he retorted sternly while I just stood there frozen in my skin too scared to speak. Too scared to breathe. And much too scared to move. "I thought you told your parents you were going to spend the night tonight?" he then bemused. And again I was too scared to speak. "Do you want to go home?" Dominic then stressed, and I wasn't sure if he was trying to sound sincere or opportunistic?

  "I'm. . .I'm tired, Dominic, and it's late." I summoned up the courage to say after a strenuous minute.

  Dominic then laughed. "No you're not.” he argued.

  "I really am tired, and I don't feel well," I fended.

  "That's not the reason why you want to go home, Jane," Dominic suddenly challenged as he stepped into me. Toying with the matted strands of my hair, Dominic then lowered his voice and sheepishly crooned. "You want to go home and tell mommy and daddy what happened here tonight and get me and my little sister into trouble."

  "No! No, Dominic!" I argued, taking a step back 'cause Dominic was literally choking my space and suddenly I couldn't breathe. "I'm not going to say anything. I mean, I swear I won't say anything. I promise."

  Dominic shook his head and merely smirked. "Those are just words, Jane."

  "No! No they're not!" I argued again only this time behind tears of frustration.

  "I'm afraid your word isn't going to be good enough; I'm going to need some proof."

  “‘Proof?’"

  "Proof that I can trust your word."

  "Dominic. . ." I started to say but my voice suddenly trailed off with my heart starting to beat fast after I glimpsed Tanya handing Dominic a camera. "I. . .I. . .don't understand?" I stammered.

  "It's quite simple, Jane," Dominic said turning on the camera and snapping a picture of me. "You're going to take off your dress and get in the back seat of my father’s car, and Tanya is going to record you not only having sex with me but with Justin and Josh - ”

  “What?” I gasped shifting a frightening glance between Justin and Josh before settling that same look on Dominic.

  “And - ”

  “No. Dominic, please?” I pleaded

  “And you're going to enjoy it,” Dominic continued, ignoring me. “You're going to smile. You're going to moan. And you're going to beg for more.”

  “Please, Dominic, don’t make me do that. Please.” I continued to plead only now I was sobbing uncontrollably.

  “Shh,” Dominic said raising my chin and shushing me. “Now while you may think that this video might be tedious to you and your family considering how families love to keep secrets and how the damage may be minimal long term. But seriously, Jane, what damage would a video like this do if it should find its way. . . say. . .hmm. . .on YouTube, or in an email, or in a text to the entire high school body? I'd say the damage wouldn't even begin to compare to the humiliation of having to walk down the school halls while guys grabbed on you and girls spat on you. Wouldn't you agree?"

  By this point my sobbing had seized and was replaced with anger literally boiling beneath my skin while my fists curled and my eyes burned with a stinging rage. But because I feared for my reputation, feared my parents finding out about the video, the only concern that escaped my mouth was, "What do you want from me?"

  "Like the party, Jane, you're going to “work” for us a few nights a week for a few hours, just for a while. No biggie." he stated nonchalantly as if what he was requesting was no big deal.

  It took me a few seconds to understand exactly what Dominic wanted from me. Then it took me a few seconds more to register his use of the term 'like the party' had it then occurred to me what he meant by "work": Meaning, Dominic wanted me to have sex with guys for money which explained why he was collecting money earlier at the party. Dominic's intention, along with Tanya and Justin and Josh, had been to prostitute me from the very beginning. And I never saw it coming.

  Suddenly I felt my knees grow weak while my insides turned inside out. Suddenly I couldn’t breathe, or hear the beating of my heart, or hold a thought; it was like my body had literally shut down.

  "Oh, God, Dominic, no!” I said taking one harrowing step back then another. “Not like that. Anything but that. Please? Please? P-L-E-A-S-E!"

  "Are you refusing me?!" Dominic erupted suddenly.

  "I can't, Dominic. I mean, I have to go home. I have to go to school. I have. . ." and just like that, without warning, without letting my tantrum dare supersede his demand, Dominic backhanded me. And it was with such a brilliant force that the hit alone spun me around and landed me over the hood of Tanya's Beamer. Dominic grabbed a stern hold of my chin and forced me to look at him.

  "Let me put it to you like this, Jane. . .if you don't do what I tell you to do, not only am I not going to kill your entire fucking family, I'm going to expose your little sister to your world. I know men in this world, Jane, men who will pay thousands of dollars to pop that tiny little cherry of hers kind of like the way I popped yours. Now I ask you: Are you still going to refuse me?"

  "Please don't hurt my family, Dom - "

  "I said. . .ARE YOU GOING TO FUCKING REFUSE ME?!"

  And instead of making a run for my life, particularly the way Dominic's words had cut through the slight chill in the little of air that comforted my freedom right before it seized itself within the perils of Dominic's sick mind, I swallowed my pride and my fear and nodded in agreement.

  "Good," Dominic retorted much more relaxed. "Now get your fucking clothes off and get in
the fucking car."

  Chapter 8

  Dominic was the first to get on top of me, and that's when the humiliation began to settle deep inside me particularly when I turned to my left and found that dreaded camera staring right at me.

  Recollecting Dominic's words about me “enjoying it”, I forced a smile, I forced a moan, uttered "deeper" and "more" as often as I could; things he demanded that if I didn’t do he would kill my family and turn my little sister into his own public whore just like I was now becoming his.

  Then the shame really began to settle the second Justin and Josh took their turn with me only they weren't as compromising as Dominic; they were rough, unpleasant, and they wanted more than just a missionary lay.

  And it was by far the worst amateur porn movie ‘cause there was nothing consensual about it.

  My heart wept silently the whole time while my mind screamed in torment. And while I tried hard to concentrate on the ending of this ordeal, to finally be able to go home and embrace my family, I realized this incident with the camera would be nothing compared to what actually lied ahead.

  After what seemed like hours of sexual humiliation and self-righteous torture came to an end when Tanya turned off the camera and got off the Bentley while I was left lying on the backseat staring up and into the sexual and emotional and physical darkness just ahead of me.

  Later that morning I had woken up in Dominic's bed and I wasn't alone - Dominic was lying beside me looking sound asleep. I picked up my head and glanced over Dominic’s shoulder toward the direction of the alarm clock sitting on the nightstand: It was just after eleven in the morning.

  I was quite taken by surprise when I glanced down at myself and noticed that someone had taken the time to dress me. And while I tried to appreciate the thought that I wasn't naked for once - not since last night - I couldn't help but to feel remorse over the throbbing in my head and the ache of my insides.

  I slowly got out of Dominic’s bed. But when I made an attempt to stand I ended up falling back down onto the bed; my legs felt weak and too heavy to hold myself up. So I just sat there allowing my legs to rejuvenate but then the bed jerked with Dominic quickly sprinting up and walking into his bathroom. A minute later he walked back out. And instead of getting dressed, he instead dove right back into bed.