Knight's Absolution (Knights of Hell Book 5)

by Sherilee Gray

  Wherever Sir kept him had to be close, but she’d yet to find where.

  Spencer touched her arm. “Please, take some of my blood. Feed. You won’t survive if he locks you away now. You’re already weak.”

  Luna’s stomach rebelled. “No.”

  Hurt filled his eyes.

  “I can’t…won’t do that to you.” I’d die before I did that. “Thank you, but I won’t do it.”

  It would turn their relationship into something that they would never be able to come back from. She never wanted Spencer to see her like that.

  She’d only ever drunk Sir’s blood. She’d never been permitted to drink from others, and never had. It was another way he controlled and manipulated her. He’d wanted her to crave him, hunger for him even when his blood made her so sick she barely stopped herself from throwing up after feeding.

  Again an image of Gunner filled her head, the way he’d pinned her to the seat. Her fangs had actually tingled—

  The door flew open, and Sir stalked in. His eyes were glowing, the veins in his throat bulging, lips peeled back.

  “You betrayed me! Again!” he roared. “I have loved you, taken care of you, given you everything you ever wanted, and this is how you repay me?”

  She said nothing. There was nothing she could say to convince him otherwise, not when he had already made up his mind.

  As for his love? If this was love, she was glad she didn’t have to experience it. And anyway, his love of power, not her, was what drew him to her family. His brand of love meant slaughtering her mother in front of her, kidnapping her and her brother, then tearing them apart.

  She’d heard Ronan’s cries through the wall, had heard him calling for her, for their mother, into the night. For dhampir, it was the connection to their human mothers that allowed them to have human emotions. If severed before they gained their powers, they’d lose the ability to feel. Luna was young when Sir came for her, she couldn’t remember what it felt like to have the full spectrum of emotions, but her brother’s cries that night still haunted her.

  He’d been taken away the next day. She hadn’t seen him since, had only felt him, felt his presence, his power come into being, felt it grow.

  Sir had appointed himself as some kind of twisted father figure. Until her hunger for blood began at age sixteen, then he’d become something else. And he’d made her pay for every ounce of blood he’d given her.

  She finally gained her powers a year ago, and he had been taking full advantage of them since.

  The male who had torn her life apart strode toward her now, and she forced herself to hold her ground, to rein in her anger. She couldn’t fight him, and there was no point running, no escape, no rescue from what was about to happen.

  He backhanded her, knocking her to the floor, then grabbed her by the hair and dragged her down the hall, down the stairs to the basement.

  She’d known this was the price she’d pay, and if given the chance, she’d do the same thing all over again. She’d still help Gunner and Grace and the other demi.

  He opened the heavy iron door and crouched down, his eyes locking with hers. “If I don’t lock you away, I will kill you. I will slit your delicate throat deeper and deeper until I take your fucking head off.”

  It was a waste of breath but still she tried because she knew the hell that was coming. “Sir,” she said, heart pounding. “Please, listen…”

  He stomped down viciously on her leg, hard enough that the bone snapped. The sharp cry that left her surprised her. He’d broken her leg before, hobbling her so she couldn’t easily escape if she somehow got out of this room. Yes, she felt pain, but not like this. Dhampir didn’t feel physical pain like humans did. It was muted. The pain of hunger surpassed all else. But this…this was beyond her experience.

  What the hell was happening to her?

  Sir dragged her across the concrete floor, deeper into the small steel-walled room, and dropped her.

  He strode to the door but paused, turning back. “Maybe I’ll be able to stomach looking at you in a couple of weeks.”

  The door banged shut a moment later.

  Luna threw her head back, and a sound came from her that she’d never made in her life.

  She screamed.

  Chapter 1

  Three months later

  Gunner sat bolt upright in bed, the blood-curdling scream from his dream still ringing in his ears. He rubbed his hands over his face, body shaking, buzzing with electricity as if a low-level current was licking over his skin.

  Christ, he couldn’t take it anymore.

  That scream had echoed through his mind every single night for the last three months. The pain, the anguish rolling through him, through his flesh and bone as if it were part of him.

  He didn’t understand it.

  Who was she? Why was she in his goddamn dreams?

  Shoving the covers back, he rolled his shoulders, still stiff from the fight the night before, the deep cut he’d taken from some demon’s dirty blade stitching itself back together. Fucker.

  He showered quickly, then dressed and headed out in search of Chaos. He’d come in late last night and hadn’t wanted to disturb the male while he was with his mate. Gunner was the only one who had regular contact with Rocco now, mainly because he didn’t give his brother any damn choice in the matter.

  Roc was as close to the edge as he’d ever been. As close to tipping into the abyss as he was the day his female was stolen from him—as he’d helplessly watched her being dragged to Hell.

  Chaos liked to be kept in the loop; all the brothers did. They were worried. They wanted Rocco home at the compound where he belonged. But Gunner didn’t see that happening anytime soon. Fuck, if ever.

  He headed down to the first floor where they trained their demi-demons. Chaos was usually here in the mornings.

  A familiar battle cry rang out, followed by several more, but these were not so familiar. He paused, glancing into one of the bigger rooms he was passing.

  Grace stood in front of the class, Meredith, Eve, and Mia facing her. The looks on their faces were fierce as they ran through their drills. Anyone would think they were about to go to war, and not just running through their usual self-defense moves—

  He paused, frowning.

  “What’s up?” James asked.

  Gunner turned to the male. “The females are training pretty hard.”

  James glanced into the room through the small glass window. “Yeah, I guess they are.”

  Their mates would lose their minds if they went out with Grace and her crew. Chaos still struggled with Grace fighting even now, despite how good a fighter she was. Being protective of their mates was just part of their DNA. “You seen Chaos?” he asked James.

  “Try the control room.” Then the demi, who helped train others like him when they were brought in with their new powers, scared and confused, walked into the room with the females and joined Grace’s class.

  When Gunner made it upstairs, Chaos was there with Lazarus. Silas too. The angel had been living at the compound the last few months since he’d had his wings taken for helping them. And though Laz still had no love for the guy, he’d stopped showing his disdain quite as much—except when they trained. Then all bets were off.

  Chaos gave him a chin lift. “What’s up?”

  Gunner leaned his ass against one of the desks and crossed his arms. “I saw Roc last night. He fought beside me and Silas for most of the night.”

  Silas nodded. “He was quiet, but he seemed more…focused.”

  “Yeah?” There was no missing the hope in Chaos’s voice, or the pain. “You think he’s nearly ready to come home?”

  “There’s still so much rage inside him, brother. He’s got his demon in control for now, but it wouldn’t take much to flip him out. I say we keep with the slow and steady approach for now.” Gunner let his gaze hit both his brothers. “And honestly, being around you and your mates might be the thing that sends him over the edge. It needs to b
e on his terms, when he’s feeling solid enough to be around it.”

  Gunner found it hard enough to be around the loved-up couples in the compound on the regular, and he’d only felt his mate’s presence for a short time before she vanished—disappearing before he could get to her. He’d never laid eyes on her, knew nothing about her, and still, her loss was a yawning hole in his chest that no amount of killing or fucking could repair.

  Not that he’d been up for the latter in quite a while. The killing, though, he’d been partaking in liberally.

  He zeroed in on the slight weight around his neck, the small gold cross he never took off.

  Close to a year ago, when things had been seriously fucked up for all of them, Gunner had been so unstable, so close to succumbing to his inner demon and hurting someone, he’d had to ask his brothers to lock him away. That’s when he felt her. His mate. He couldn’t get to her. And when he’d finally gotten free, he’d followed what he could only describe as a shadow, an echo of her presence.

  He’d found this little cross on the pavement.

  It was hers. He was in no doubt that it had once hung around his mate’s throat. The chain was delicate and just fit around his neck.

  “He belongs here with his brothers,” Chaos said.

  Silas’s silver gaze moved between them. “We can’t force it.”

  Laz growled. “You’re not family, angel. Butt the fuck out.”

  Silas stiffened but dipped his chin. “Apologies.” He backed up a step. “I’m just heading out, anyway. I found one of Lucifer’s handmaids. They used to have the ability to move between Heaven and Earth freely, it’s a long shot, but maybe she can help us get Kyler back to Rocco.” Then he turned and walked out.

  “You gonna lighten up on him anytime soon?” Gunner asked.

  Lazarus swung to him, still pissed. “Until you have a mate, I suggest you not comment, brother. Because that angel chose to withhold information, I almost fucking lost mine.”

  Gunner bit back the growl climbing up his throat, fighting back what he really wanted to say as his blood pumped hotly through his veins. His brothers didn’t know what happened with Gunner’s own female, or that losing her was a direct result of what happened with Eve when Laz brought her to the compound that first time. And Gunner wasn’t sure if he’d ever be ready to tell them.

  He sure as hell didn’t want their pity.

  “But you fucking have her, though, right, Laz?” Apparently, he was going to say a few more things after all. “She’s walking and breathing and sharing your bed every night. I get you’re pissed, he shouldn’t have kept shit from you back then…but she’s okay. You have your mate.”

  Laz growled.

  Chaos cursed.

  “Silas has tried to make amends, repeatedly. He’s actively trying to get Kyler back to Roc, right this fucking minute,” Gunner bit out. “Eve has no problem with the angel, so why the hell can’t you let this shit go?”

  “I’m thankful for what he’s doing for Roc, I am, but, brother, you don’t know what you’re talking about,” Laz fired back.

  “Silas had his wings literally torn from his fucking back and most of his powers drained before he was thrown away by his family for helping us. We are his motherfucking family. It’s time to get your head out of your damned ass, ’cause the way I see it, you’re doing a fuck of a lot better than he is right now.”

  They stared at each other, Laz breathing hard.

  “We don’t have time for this right now,” Chaos said as he stepped in between them.

  Gunner forced himself to break eye contact. “I sure as fuck don’t. I’m gonna go find Roc, make sure he’s not dismembering demons in the middle of the goddamn street.”

  Tugging his shirt off, Gunner tucked it in the back of his jeans and stepped out onto the balcony. Extending his bronze and gold wings, he took flight, heading for the city.

  It didn’t take long to find Roc. He was where Gunner often found him. On the roof of one of the buildings overlooking the alley where the portal opened every solstice and equinox. Where demons tried to escape Hell.

  The last place Roc had seen his female.

  Rocco lay back beside an air-conditioning unit, one arm under his head, the other holding one of his knives, spinning and catching it over and over. He looked even rougher than the night before. But at least he’d showered and changed his demon-blood-soaked clothes.

  Rocco’s navy blue eyes slid to him when he landed. “Back so soon?”

  Gunner shrugged, tucked in his wings, and sat beside his brother. “Chaos still wants you home…”

  “No.” Rocco spun the blade again.

  “Told him as much. Where you been staying?”

  “Got somewhere nearby.”

  Gunner leaned against the heavy steel behind him and rested his forearms on his knees. “Do you…have you sensed her at all?” Gunner usually tried to avoid talking about Kyler, but it wasn’t as if talking about her could make things worse. Who knew, maybe it would help?

  His brother's throat worked. “No…yes.” He shoved his fingers through his overgrown hair. “Fucked if I know. Sometimes, I think I do…but only when I’m asleep.”

  Gunner stilled. “What happens? You see her, hear her, what?”

  He fisted his hair roughly, his breathing growing ragged. His eyes darkened, black swallowing the blue of his irises, his demon showing through.

  “We don’t need to talk about it, Roc.”

  “I can’t,” he growled out.

  Gunner stayed where he was, sitting in silence with his brother.

  No, they didn’t need to talk.

  Wherever this pair of demons were going, they were in a hurry. Gunner glanced over at Rocco. His brother hadn’t needed any convincing to hunt with him tonight, and he’d taken it as a good sign.

  But looking at him now, Gunner wasn’t so sure.

  Roc’s eyes were all predator, black and focused on their prey. The skin over his face was taut and lined, at odd angles, as if his Kishi demon was right there below the surface ready to explode through.

  “You solid?” Gunner asked as they flew above the two leathren demons.

  He gave him a sharp nod. “Something’s not right.”

  Roc was right. Leathren preferred their own company. Two together like this was unusual. They fed off other people’s pain and suffering. They were scavengers in Hell, absorbing the screams and cries of the damned. On Earth, they followed pain and suffering wherever they could find it. But they weren’t known to share.

  There had to be suffering close by, and for these demons to willingly put up with each other, the payoff—feeding off the suffering of whoever was providing these fuckers with their dinner—had to be big, which meant someone was in some serious pain.

  Roc slipped his blade free, angling his body, preparing to swoop down.

  “Wait,” Gunner said. “Someone could need our help. You kill these demons now, we might not be able to find them.”

  Rocco growled low but did as Gunner asked. A month ago, hell, a week ago, there would have been no stopping him. He would have already questioned, tortured, and slaughtered both demons as soon as he’d seen them, convinced they might know something about his female.

  So far, his efforts to learn anything about Kyler and what had become of her in Hell had been fruitless.

  They turned onto a street. It was a swank part of town, lots of mini-mansions and big yards. An empty lot was up ahead, and the demons picked up pace when they saw it. They headed toward a cordoned-off mound of topsoil and—

  Vanished.

  “Fuck.” Things had been quiet since they’d raided a warehouse—a fucking prison—a few months ago. Gunner and his brothers had freed a bunch of demi-demons being held against their will by a powerful demon on Diemos’s payroll. Somehow the current ruler of Hell was communicating with the demons here on Earth, and he and his army had abducted demi to exploit their powers, to use them as weapons, to help grow his army and have them ready and
waiting when Diemos finally escaped Hell and took over Earth.

  Grace, Chaos’s mate, had been one of those demi, and if it wasn’t for her little goth friend, Grace would probably still be a prisoner. The other female had helped Grace escape, and then she’d texted with details of where to find the rest of the demi who had been abducted.

  Because of her, they’d been able to take out a lot of the demon army tasked with guarding the demi as well.

  What they hadn’t done was find the little goth female who had helped them or the powerful demon behind it all.

  Roc sneered. “Fuckers are back to their old tricks.”

  They both landed and walked onto the empty lot, turning, searching the shadows. They’d been ambushed like this before. Demons seeming to vanish into thin air only to pop back up with a whole bunch of their buddies. Gunner stood there stiffly, Roc at his side, and waited, expecting it.

  But nothing happened.

  No hoard of demons holding rusty knives appeared, and it didn’t look as if the two leathren had any intention of coming back either.

  “Let’s keep searching the area,” Gunner said, because something seriously fucked up was going on.

  Chapter 2

  Luna lay in the dark, strange sensations in her belly growing stronger, twisting as if they were in some kind of battle.

  Sir had his arms slung over her waist, his naked body pressed against her back, his fingers still deep in her hair, fisting tight even in sleep.

  She wanted to pull from his fucking hold, tear a leg off the bedside table and stab him with it. Then she wanted to go to the bathroom and wipe the stickiness from between her legs, followed by shoving her fingers down her throat and vomiting up his blood, hot and toxic, sitting in her stomach.

  Escape the awful way her body felt every time she drank from him.

  She wouldn’t do either of those things. He’d let her out of the basement a week ago, after two weeks without blood, food, or water. Without a soul to speak to. She’d been starved and on the verge of something…something she couldn’t describe when he dragged her out.