Wish You Weren't Here

by Janeen Ippolito

  Aha. Dreams tend to distort things, but the gist came through. Cid had given me a blood transfusion, and in doing so, more blood magic had entered my veins. I say more because I’d already received a small transfusion as the finishing touch to vampire blood bonds. But a rain of red? Yeesh. Blood magic was so melodramatic in the Dreamscape.

  I sighed in relief. “Thanks, Cid.”

  “I told you I’d never leave you,” his voice whispered in my ear. “You need to trust me more. And next time, wait for me before running into chaos.”

  Around us, the Dreamscape changed to a familiar gray desert with endlessly blowing winds. I turned to face him. His eyes were bright black, his chest bare, his raven wings outstretched. A disapproving look was on his face.

  “Cid, I had to act. Terezal was going to hurt people.”

  “You didn’t have to do it alone.”

  “Yes, I did,” I huffed. “You were busy and besides, you don’t want me working with you as a blood binder. So I did it solo.”

  “I never said I didn’t want you working with me, but at that moment, it wasn’t safe!”

  “No duh. Welcome to my life. I do things anyway that aren’t safe Why does this surprise you?”

  “It doesn’t.” Shadows swirled around him. “But I thought this morning we had agreed again that you were going to wait until I had secured your favor and ensured Lady Malda wouldn’t harm you.”

  “Things change. And I never really agreed so much as I chose not to argue with the really hot, caring raven-vampire guy who wasn’t listening to me anyway!”

  He took that like a slap to the face. “Why didn’t you simply tell me you wanted to make the utterly foolish decision of putting yourself in direct danger when you don’t have to? I’m here for you. I would have stayed at the shop with you in a heartbeat.”

  “Not as a partner. Not as someone who believes in me, not as the man who dealt with Neil Halverson with me and encouraged me. As an oh-so-concerned babysitter who wants to make sure I don’t blow anything up.” I shook my head. “So much for you trusting me.”

  “It has nothing to do with trust.” Cendric’s wings flapped, the hurt and fear apparent. “We both agreed you need more training.”

  “That was part of what I was getting today.”

  “By allying with your former lover?”

  “You are aware I have more than one of those.” I winced. That didn’t come out the way I wanted. “Yes, okay? It was the best idea I had at the time.”

  He crossed his arms. “And why not remain in the Fae courtyard with Terezal and challenge her there?”

  A sigh escaped me. “No one there would support me. But I’m not letting it stop me, okay? Not when I can make a difference for someone else.” Cendric drilled me with a stare, which I returned defiantly, raising my chin. “I was doing investigations long before I met you. That’s why you called me capable, isn’t it?”

  “I meant capable to ask questions and research, not get into mortal danger.” His fears radiated off him in tangible smoke. “I can’t lose you, Allis.” Cendric’s voice lowered, turning rich and dangerously beguiling, even as his shadows curled around me, filled with equal parts grief and persuasion. “You have to stay away from these situations a little while longer.”

  I could feel the allure surrounding, urging me to concede. To do what he wanted, to give in. He was my house, and I needed him.

  Then sapphire flames filled my hands. “I can’t. I won’t.” I pushed deeper into the shadows, letting them flow over me. “Hey, I did manage to crack open a case and delegate responsibilities to others for further research. And the Jinn magic even helped!”

  A warm, flat voice echoed in the Dreamscape. “It certainly did. Thanks to me.”

  Anger flared within me. Kiran Singh? Again?

  I whirled around, fire flaring from me. “Get. Out.”

  “Aha, but don’t you want to know how I got in?” He smirked, his hands on his hips and clad in the same paint-splattered jeans and white t-shirt and Doc Martens as before. “After all, it’s almost your fault. Again.”

  “My fault? Says the lying Jinn who set me up to confront his crazy girlfriend—”

  Anger lit his face. “You were the one who grabbed my arm and tagged along in my teleportation. I didn’t force you!”

  “How else would I have learned that you were doped with the same love potion we were conveniently investigating for the sake of others?”

  “Maybe I never wanted you to know!”

  “Why?”

  His jaw snapped shut. “Nothing, Sandy.”

  The air around me crackled with magic, and my arms and hands flickered with sapphire flames. Around us, the Dreamscape darkened and thunder crashed in the distance. Cendric stepped forward, his pale face sharp and wild. Shadows swirled around his arms. “You will leave my mate alone, and never come into our private sanctuary again.”

  Shadows flew from his palms and coiled around Kiran, consuming him. He only bared his teeth defiantly, a gleaming streak of white against brown skin. “Claiming her as yours doesn’t make it so, vampire. She always has a choice.” He laughed. “And she chose me first.”

  Good grief. “Then I un-chose you! Also my choice!”

  “So you think.”

  A rage-filled screech escaped the vampire, and closing his fist, the shadows obscured Kiran completely. Orange flames fought against them, arcing up to attack Cendric’s magic, and strange words flowed from Kiran’s mouth. But all to no avail. He vanished.

  Relief filled me. Any compassion I still had for my ex was overwhelmed by his underhanded dealings and clear lack of boundaries.

  Kiran might not be behind the love potions, but one thing was for certain.

  He wasn’t giving me full information any more than Cid was.

  I turned to Cendric. “Well, that was a close one. Time to get out, right?”

  There was only a squawk in response. I snorted. “Cute, Cid. But words now. I can’t always understand your squawks.”

  His black eyes widened. “I … I’m trying …”

  Horror filled his expression as, unbidden, he shrank into the form of a raven, and his voice fell silent.

  “Cid? Cendric!”

  Only the piercing gaze of a raven stared at me, its beak dripping with blood.

  All was silent.

  Then the raven flew at my face, clawing at me.

  Casting me out of the Dreamscape.

  Chapter 11

  I woke up with a scream that came out a coughing whisper through my parched mouth. Blinking through crusty eyes, I stretched my sore arms. More like sore veins, along with sore legs and sore everywhere else, as if someone had run lightning through my body. Something or someone—Cendric, I immediately knew—had collapsed on top of me, heavy and motionless.

  “No.” Wetness blurred my eyes. “Cid, wake up. Wake up!”

  My voice cracked. More blinking through tears revealed our bedroom, with stars outside the giant windows and the lamps turned to a soothing half-light. I was sprawled in our bed. My husband was a dark stain across the gray comforter, his hair spilling across my chest.

  I pressed his throat, seeking his pulse. Erratic, but it was there, reminding me more of the rapid heartbeat of his raven soul in the Dreamscape than the vampire form he inhabited.

  My breath caught. This couldn’t be happening. What had Kiran done to him?

  I’m going to kill him.

  The thought sank deep into my soul with the certainty of a bowling ball spinning down for a strike. The Jinn would die by my hand, and then I’d bring him back to life and kill him all over again. And again.

  And again.

  No one could take what was mine—or else I’d have nothing left. No home.

  Nothing.

  Someone was moving Cendric away from me. A hiss escaped my throat, and I grabbed for him. But my muscles were rubber, and the man grabbing Cendric only tsked.

  “Give him back,” I demanded with all the ferocity of a k
itten with laryngitis.

  “You can’t help him right now.” The voice was smooth and cutting with a slight accent I couldn’t place. Something like Italian smashed with British with a side of Ohio. “And you need to breathe, which is far more difficult with his weight on top of you.”

  The speaker moved into view. Olive skin, close-cropped black hair, a clean-shaven face, and deep brown eyes. He stepped with a certain wariness to his square frame, as if he were suspicious of the world around him, and he was clad in black pants and a white button-down covered in blood stains.

  My blood. I could smell it. One of the most random side effects of my blood bond with Cendric. I pressed my lips together. I knew the strange man’s face.

  Melrose Durante. One of the world’s oldest vampires, and the one I was supposed to impress tonight. “What’s going on? What are you doing here?”

  “I assisted in saving your life, to start with.” He settled Cendric on the other side of the bed, easing him on his back. “Cendric did most of the work, as your mate. But it seems to have cost him.” He narrowed his eyes at me. “What happened in the Dreamscape?”

  “You know about that?”

  “I’ve never been inside one, but Cendric has told me. He said he was going to enter it with you, but only one of you has emerged. Why?”

  Something in his blunt words, edged with suspicion, made me throw up my hands then drop them to the blankets again because I had zero energy. “Yeah, because it’s always my fault. Definitely not the Jinn who invaded our Dreamscape. Again. Let’s just blame Allis.”

  Melrose rolled his eyes and tucked pillows beneath me so I could sit up. “If it isn’t your fault, then simply inform me of what happened.”

  “It won’t matter. You’ve already decided against me.” I was aware that this wasn’t the best way to speak to an incredibly powerful vampire, especially since I knew he cared for Cendric almost as much as I did. But I’d had a really, really long day. And even through the thick wall Melrose had around his mind, I could sense the fear he had. Of me.

  He’s right to be afraid of me. I can teleport his heart outside of his body, and do far, far worse.

  I probably shouldn’t be drawing so much comfort from my ability to hurt others. But my mate had just gotten attacked, and we hadn’t even had a chance to finish our argument.

  Melrose sighed and sat down in a chair next to the bed. “I’m not your enemy.”

  “You don’t trust me.”

  “You’re mostly Jinn. I have no reason to.”

  So much for Cid’s words of assurance. Sometimes my mate could be too optimistic.

  “But I should trust you,” I replied. “Because you’re older, wiser, and as usual, you hold all the cards. Your type of immortal always does.”

  “If we’re speaking of stereotypes, then your type of shrill, defiant youth with a chip on your shoulder seldom listens to good advice.”

  I lifted my chin, which took way more effort than it should have. “The only chips I have are potato chips. Somewhere in this house.”

  His expression remained stern. “Ah, and there is the facetious Jinn playfulness, concealing a dangerously capricious nature. How did you fall in love with Cendric? Were you only swept up in his desires and now regret your choice?”

  My stomach clenched and tiny flickers of sapphire sputtered from my wrists. He wanted to go there? I could go there. “Insulting the patient? Great bedside manner. Although if you’re only healing patients to drain their blood, I guess it doesn’t matter.”

  “Hmph. It seems you do have bite.” Melrose rubbed his forehead. “Despite my misgivings about you, you are Cendric’s mate, so we will need to declare a truce. Unlike you, I can recognize when I’m dealing with an equal force.”

  I collapsed back on the pillows, suddenly exhausted from the verbal sparring. “In case Cid didn’t tell you, I’m still trying to figure out what my magic even is, much less how to use it. One Jinn in the city hates me, and the other just messed up my husband. So it’s not like I’ve had much help learning who I am and what I can do.”

  Melrose breathed out a few words that were either a prayer or curses. “What is it with Jinn hurting each other? Even vampires protect their own.”

  “I don’t have an ‘own’.” I shrugged. “I don’t know who my father was. So even if I had a tribe, good luck finding them.”

  Although Terezal had called me a Niqual Marid. Whatever that meant.

  “Luck is a pagan superstition.”

  “Man, shut up and stop correcting me for five seconds, will you?”

  At that, a rueful smile twitched his lips. “Now you sound like my daughter. Which I suppose you are, after a fashion.”

  “If this is how you treat your family, no thanks.”

  He sighed. “Opting out isn’t a possibility. To prove I’m not your enemy, I’ll teach you something about your Jinn nature.”

  “Go ahead.” It wasn’t like I could go anywhere anyway. Couldn’t help my mate, couldn’t stop Kiran. Yay useless Allis.

  “Jinn have a way of charming others. It stems from their ability to read fears and desires. They naturally adapt and become a part of fulfilling those desires. They can also increase the fears of others. I’ve learned about your ability to stage a honey trap, and it is likely that you’ve leaned into the desire. Your apparent self-hatred means you most likely have not abused the fear portion of this power.”

  I frowned. “I don’t enjoy people being scared of me. It’s not fun.”

  “No. It grows very tiresome, even when it’s convenient.” He shot me an understanding look. Right. As a vampire, Melrose would get that.

  I exhaled slowly, processing the information. Recalling some I could give in turn, since Melrose was trying to trust me. I thought back to the Dreamscape. “Kiran was saying something while flinging magic at Cendric. I’ve never seen Cendric look so scared. Then he … disappeared into a raven. Not the smart raven. Like, a harsh, cruel bird that tried to attack me.”

  Melrose scowled. “One of Cendric’s greatest fears is losing the balance between his raven and vampire natures. Ravens are naturally cruel, calculating shifters whose intellect overrides their kindness.”

  “An unkindness of ravens.”

  “An accurate statement. Kiran must have used a curse that tapped into Cendric’s fears and amplified them. Cendric attacking you might have been him acting on that fear—or it might have been him trying to keep you away lest he harm you.” Melrose gave a humorless smile. “This Jinn needs to die for casting such a curse.”

  “I agree.” At least for the moment.

  “Do you know why the he would do such a thing?”

  I winced. “Kiran has this obsession with me. I think he’s under the influence of a bad love potion. His ex-girlfriend was under the same thing, and she was ready to chase me all over Pittsburgh in broad daylight to try and kill me.”

  “Wonderful.” Melrose paused. “You didn’t kill her?”

  “I might want to kill people, but I don’t. And I’m working on the “want to” part because what I want tends to become reality.”

  “A promising sign for your morality, which isn’t common in Jinn.”

  I snorted. “Gee, thanks. Glad all those Sunday school lessons amounted to something.”

  He glanced at my right arm with the equidistant cross tattoo. “Ah yes. Cendric spoke of that. I don’t suppose you’d consider listening to a lecture on reformed theology to see the error of your ways?”

  Right. Melrose had been involved in the Protestant Reformation. Cid had told me the name Melrose had come from the vampire siding with the Scottish Covenanters.

  “Nope. Cendric has been trying to talk me into Anglicanism, but that’s between us, not you.”

  “This is hardly the time anyway.” A smile ghosted his lips. “On to more education. I can tell you that your father is a Marid. I’m uncertain as to the tribe, but the sapphire flames are a giveaway.”

  I picked at the blanket covering m
e. “Terezal used that word too, along with the word Niqual. She acted as if she expected me to be all arrogant and stuff, like I was better than her, or stronger.”

  “You are,” he said simply. “I’ve never heard of Niqual, but there are not many Marid Jinn in the world, and none of them are outside of the homelands.”

  “And you know this how?”

  “My parents were ancient vampires in a thriving underground cult in Egypt. They taught me about Jinn for my own protection. Vampires and Jinn are, at best, indifferent enemies.”

  Well, that was just great. “Good thing I’m part human, right?”

  “It would explain how you’re able to survive here.”

  “How’s that?” My throat choked on the words. “Um, could I have some water? Please?”

  He handed me my trusty green smoothie cup with matching straw. “Here. Tell me if you find it unpleasant.”

  “Okay …”

  I took a sip. Cool liquid spilled down my throat, energy and power tinged with a very odd aftertaste. Not unpleasant—actually, it was pretty good. Just odd.

  I frowned, trying to zero in on one of the flavors. “Strawberry?”

  “Among other things.”

  “Artificial, huh?” I shook my head. “It doesn’t need it. Too chemical. The other flavor is better. What is it?”

  Melrose cleared his throat. “A specialized mixture of essential nutrients your body needs desperately. It is good to know it doesn’t bother you. Most people would shudder at the taste.”

  I shrugged, eagerly draining another mouthful. “Well, I enjoy weird mixtures—even ones that taste like celery, copper, and lemongrass. Although it’s pretty strong.” I took another sip. “So, homelands?”

  “Jinn magic is strongly tied to place.”

  I nodded. “Like tree elves and their forests, iron elves and dwarves and their mines, shifters and their territory.”

  “Precisely. For wish-granting Jinn, it’s complicated by their keen attunement to their surroundings. They are easily overwhelmed by their magical perceptions and desire physical as well as mental quiet. Any living thing they did not create can be exhausting to endure. This is why their homelands are primarily in deserts and other lifeless areas. Apparently, they find it soothing.”