Wish You Weren't Here

by Janeen Ippolito

  Oh no, he didn’t. None of the shame complex. I grabbed his arms, pulling him back to me. “I know you didn’t. Neither of us did, and I’m sure that was another reason Malda had no problems with you being my ‘house.’ Maybe she wanted us to self-destruct.”

  He glared at me. “I will kill her.”

  “Get in line.”

  Cendric’s all-black eyes fixed on me. “Allis, I’m serious. I will kill her and feast on her raw flesh.”

  “Yeah, you just do that, zombie-brain.”

  A ghost of a smile twitched his lips, although it didn’t reach his eyes. “I thought I was a birdbrain.”

  “Depends on the mood.” I stroked his hair, which had more feathers through it than usual. “I will say that you reading my desires and fears seems to stress you out. You mentioned the same thing earlier.”

  “Yes, but I want to understand you, and you hide your emotions beneath sarcasm and denial.”

  “Guilty.” I flashed him an innocent look. “But isn’t that part of my trickster charm that challenges you to pursue me?”

  At that he gave a full smile, touched with annoyance. “Sometimes. And sometimes, it’s just profoundly annoying.”

  “That’s fair.” I sighed. “Well, I’m going to be taking Pittsburgh back from Malda anyway. How about I try to funnel a lot of that Jinn magic into taking Malda’s place, and then just leave a little for our mate bond and maybe a few small perks. It’s useful to be able to track the blood flow and pulses of others.”

  “It is, isn’t it?”

  “Yup.” I gave a short laugh. “And I’ll work at opening up more. As we figure things out and talk with Casimir, we can deal with the rest. That way you won’t have to worry about controlling me, or contaminating me with your dark doom of darkest darkness when we go into the field as blood binders.”

  Cendric quirked an eyebrow. “You forgot three extra ‘darknesses’ there. I’m not sure I can allow you into the dark dark evil way.”

  “So I’ll break in. More fun for me.”

  “Many things are fun.” He gave me a wicked grin. “Such as seeing if a half-Jinn can endure raven aerial maneuvers.”

  I lifted my chin, a thrill racing through me. “Bring it, birdbrain.”

  Chapter 20

  Since I was trying to own this whole leadership thing, I called a meeting to discuss our plans. Well, “called” is a loose term. I sent everyone goofy text messages with an undertone of urgency. But I think I got the point across. No one seemed surprised, no one fought it. We scheduled to meet at the coffee shop the following night at 11 pm. The late time worked great for everyone except for Theiya, and she would just drink more coffee to manage.

  But at 11 pm, I was the only one there—except for Cendric. Meetings happened that way when the lead private investigator had twins with growing pains, the lead alchemist had an early gig to play at a private party, and so on. Even Cid had some memos to update, which he did sitting next to me at the long table, tapping away at his laptop. Meanwhile, I sipped a hot sauce mocha with cucumber-avocado whipped cream and sprinkles, courtesy of Matthias Mardes, who had then vanished upstairs to do something.

  I sighed, tapping my pen on the scrap of paper I’d used to jot notes on. It should work. There were some loose ends to figure out, but everyone was smart in different ways. Together, we could make it work out fine. Just fine.

  A whirl of shadows and light flickered in front of me, followed by a blast of pure starlight. Next to me, I felt Cendric snap to attention. A moment later, Diza and Casimir stepped out of the portal. Diza wore blue jeans, motorcycle boots, and a royal blue corset over a low-cut blouse, her brilliant red hair braided over her shoulder. Just like before, she fit right in with the local Fae—she was even enjoying the new trend of metallic nails glittery with magic dust that changed colors depending on the person’s mood.

  I glanced at Casimir and raised my eyebrows. “I see you lost the glowing bedsheets, Flashlight.”

  “Apparently this planet does not respect appropriate fashions.” He sniffed and gave the leather jacket he wore a tug. Underneath was a dark gray turtleneck with black trousers and simple black boots. He’d even wrangled the waterfall of silver-gold hair into a ponytail.

  The ponytail would only make it easier for a dark mage, a curse-monger, or an Unspoken to cut it off his hair and use it in potions. Snipping off a ponytail was easy work, and elf hair of that quality went for a pretty penny. But the guy was trying.

  “Where’s Shawn?” I asked.

  His expression turned slightly fond. “Feasting on a pile of road scraps at the safehouse.”

  “Aww, how cute!”

  “It is,” Diza agreed with a grin. “I bought them matching t-shirts with Shaun the Sheep on the front.”

  Casimir glared at her. “I’m not wearing mine.”

  She blinked. “It’s only a matter of time before you go native, Casimir.”

  I laughed, tempted to continue the teasing. But I had bigger fish to fry. Like figuring out what these two wanted with me and how I could finagle my way into some Jinn training. I nudged Cendric with my sneaker under the table, sensing his matching desire for answers.

  “You’re the ones who came here,” Cendric remarked. “All for the sake of Allis, yes?”

  Casimir and Diza exchanged a glance. The sort of exchange that spoke to a prior history, even though they weren’t acting like a couple. My relationship vibes detected … exes? Maybe. But on far better terms than Kir and I.

  At last, Diza spoke. “Yes, we came to investigate Allis for Lyrium potential.”

  “I’m flattered. But I’m already a blood binder in this city, alongside Cendric.” I paused. “And you already have Theiya and her crew working to keep the dimensions all nice. Isn’t that what you said?”

  “Indeed, it is.” Casimir frowned. “You still persist in ignoring your destiny?”

  I rolled my eyes. “Destiny led me to make unbreakable bonds with Gideon and Cendric. Destiny led me to work with Jack and Theiya and Matthias and all kinds of people. After all that, why on earth would destiny try to single me out and take me away from them?”

  “You have a good point.” Diza tapped her nails on the table. “Which is why we’ve stepped back to do more recon work to understand exactly what place you have in the Lyrium.”

  “You’re assuming I have a place.”

  Her turquoise eyes fixed me with a look of certainty as cold and immutable as the stars. “You do. That much is clear.”

  My hackles rose. “You can’t make me.”

  Sapphire magic flickered from my fingertips.

  “You’re right. I can’t. No more than the Lyrium could coerce any of your father’s line. The Niqual Marid. All of them possessed the same natural magic for teleportation between dimensions. All of them, feared by the other Jinn tribes.” She paused, and sadness slipped over her features. “All of them, gone.”

  I swallowed, sitting back in my chair. “Wait … gone? What do you mean? Like … dead?”

  Cendric clasped my hand in his, the shadowy magic calming me. Or at least, calming my magic. My insides were still a whirlwind of unknowable emotions.

  How could I care about any of them when they’d never cared about me? Even if dear old Dad was dead, it meant nothing.

  I pressed my lips together.

  Nothing.

  I couldn’t miss someone who’d never been there.

  Casimir leaned forward, his gaze softening. His voice was quiet. “The universe is a vast and dangerous place. One by one, your tribe fell prey to the lure of portal travel and their own independence. They left the planet and were drawn to the Lyrium, becoming agents … of a sort. Many were quite rebellious. We’ve tracked down most of their … ends.”

  “My father’s?”

  Diza gave Casimir a warning look.

  That was all I needed to know. I sighed. “Him too, huh?”

  “As far as we know, yes.”

  Cendric and I were already sitting clo
se together at the table, but at that he moved right up against my side. It was oddly comforting, even though I didn’t quite feel as if I needed to be comforted. None of this seemed real any more than my dad had ever seemed real. Mom had never even talked about him. Somehow, a part of me knew he was never coming back.

  Apparently, the universe had decided I didn’t need a Jinn father.

  I breathed out slowly. “How?”

  Casimir spoke, his gaze never wavering from mine. “A being called Raith. Although we don’t know much about his intentions, we do know he sees powerful planet-travelers like your tribe as a threat. Your innate resistance to magic extends beyond this world, and it seems that your kind detected Raith’s machinations. Consequently, he killed all the Jinn and siphoned their power for his own ends.”

  My muscles seized.

  “Is Allis in danger?” Cendric demanded. “What preparations do we have to make?”

  Diza shook her head. “Your curse-mark protected you from being detected, Allis. And now your human side makes your magical signature unique, so he won’t immediately sense you. But that most recent show of strength attracted our attention, so …”

  “He could stop by, just for the fun of it?”

  Diza glanced at Casimir, and he shrugged. “The best thing you can do is learn as much about your magic as possible and make wise allies of us.”

  “Convenient. I could still die, huh?”

  “I realize this comes as a shock,” Diza said, regret lining her elegant features. “I have no desire to control you. We simply welcome you and yours to a place among us, whatever that place looks like.”

  Cendric tilted his head. “Do you include me? And Gideon?”

  “Yes,” Casimir said. “A bond is a bond. They are made with intent and purpose. And since you and Gideon are equally marked by destiny, there must also be places for you.” He sighed. “I know all too well the dangers of turning one’s back on family.”

  I studied him, remembering our brief mental mingling in the Dreamscape. “Yeah, you do, don’t you?”

  His face took on a haunted expression. “More than I ever wished to. But that was my own folly which I alone must atone for.”

  Something about his mood struck me. I didn’t like it being so sad. Sad wasn’t a good look for Casimir.

  “Nah, not alone. Get over yourself.”

  He raised his head. “Oh?”

  I exchanged a look with Cendric. We didn’t have the same level of nonverbal communication as Diza and Casimir, but we’d previously discussed our deal and gotten input from Gideon as well. Only a final affirmation was needed.

  “We are open to working with the Lyrium on a case-by-case basis, where our unique skills might be required,” Cendric said, his manner one hundred percent vampire lawyer. “And suitable contracts will be drawn up to ensure all parties are satisfied and that our interests are protected.”

  “I would expect nothing less,” Diza replied. “Yet why do I sense there is more?”

  “There is also the matter of training one Allisandra Evanenko-Antalek in the use of her Jinn magic.” Cendric leveled a stare at Casimir. “You mentioned you have extensive knowledge, and Diza claims you have expertise in instruction.”

  Casimir’s lips curved into a faint smile. “I do. I’ve taught thousands over the millennia.”

  I grinned. “Well, I can guarantee none of them are anything like me.”

  “You are correct.” His smile grew. “You are far more trouble than any of my previous pupils combined.”

  “I prefer to think of it as creative spunk with a side of inconvenient willfulness. Blame it on my lack of a father figure.” Equal parts mirth and grief clutched my heart. Hey, if I couldn’t joke about the tragedy, there wasn’t a point to it.

  He tsked. “I’d rather see to it that you cease making excuses and start taking responsibility for your choices. Then making better and bolder choices that shake the foundations of this city.”

  “Oh?” I hadn’t expected that last part.

  Casimir winked. “It takes a rebel to know one.”

  “Yes, and if anyone knows how to almost turn the space-time continuum on its head, it’s Casimir here.” Diza smirked.

  “I need to hear this story.”

  He glared at the redhead, then turned to me, his expression flat. “No, you don’t.”

  “So can I buy the book, then? Or is it so epic that it spans two books?” I grinned. “See, Flashlight, everyone here has done terrible things they don’t wanna talk about. Or dreamed things like that. My brain regularly goes into ‘I want everyone to die’ mode, and I have to stop it. Jack can kill people with her eyes— and she’s a trained berserker. Matthias is a siren—legit Unspoken and an assassin that even other Unspoken hate. Cid here has done all kinds of bad things and mesmerized whole cities for doom.” I clapped him on the back and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

  My husband shook his head. “Has anyone told you that you’re peculiar?”

  “You. Always as a compliment.”

  “Mostly.”

  I shoved him and continued. “Theiya’s got her own issues, I’m sure. Josie burnt down a boyfriend’s barn after he cheated on her. Messed up his prize car real good. And Gideon...well, Gideon’s in the clear, but he’s Gideon.”

  Diza laughed. “You see, Casimir? I told you that you’d fit in here.”

  “A criminal among criminals. Wonderful.” But a light shone in his midnight eyes. “Very well. This might actually have a chance for success.”

  I nodded. “Yup!” Then I spied Theiya walking in the door. I raised my voice. “All I have to do is figure out what these crazy people want with giving me lead on this mission.”

  “I suppose we must be desperate,” she retorted, her eyes twinkling though her face remained grave. “These are desperate times.”

  More footsteps sounded from behind me. A moment later, Jack plopped into a chair. Her short red hair was tousled around her fox ears, her clothing was rumpled, and her blue eyes looked conflicted. But not about me—about something else. “Yeah, and besides, we all trust you’re not going to backstab us. You’re too damn moral, and when you’re not, you’ve got the vampire lawyer to convince you to toe the line.”

  My mouth dropped open. “Are you saying you all listen to me because I’m honest? Me, the one with the crazy Jinn magic?”

  Theiya nodded. “Essentially. You might be crazy, as you say, but you’re aware of it.”

  “More than I can say for Theiya and me sometimes.” Jack shrugged. “That reminds me. What do you say to you being in charge of all of us?”

  I blinked. “Wait, what? You said we were working as partners.”

  “Yeah, but someone’s gotta take responsibility and stop everything from going to hell.”

  “Wow, that’s flattering. Is this why you kept bringing up leadership?”

  “One of the reasons.” Jack propped her legs up on the table. “You have that whole insight thing that’s helpful, and so’s your magic. There are other PI firms showing up in this city all the time. Every broody grayling in a trench coat and broken girl in leather pants wants to pull out a sword and start taking customers. The market is crowded, and it’s important to stay flexible. I join the team of a romantic consulting firm that makes potions and has legal help? That gives us a unique angle. Way more customers. Plus, with you and Cendric running it, I have way less paperwork.”

  Cendric narrowed his eyes. “In other words, you want to use my significant income and resources for your own personal benefit.”

  “You got it, Mr. 10K-Means-Nothing-To-Me. Plus, you both have that blood binder cred. It lets me do all the fun monster hunting parts and still get home to my kits.”

  Theiya nodded. “Working with Cendric also gives Jack additional legitimacy within the Fae court. I have no issues with this arrangement.”

  “… okay …” Let’s do this, destiny. I looked over at Cendric. He only gave me the world’s most annoyingly smug grin. I rolled my
eyes. “So help me, if you say ‘I told you so,’ I’ll smack you.”

  He switched to Hungarian. “I told you so.”

  “You know I can understand you.”

  “Yes, but technically the words are not the same.”

  Jack grinned. “So it’s settled. Momoru Investigations is officially a subsidiary of whatever you’re calling your business.”

  At that moment, Gideon strode through the front door. His expression was troubled, like the time an asshole gang broke his first violin when he was busking as a teenager. I sat up straight. “Hey, bro. What’s up?”

  He shook his head. “Two more people died today from love potion overdoses. Every time the alchemists guild thinks they have the supply network locked down, someone else shows up love-crazy.”

  “Yinz can’t find the source potion to negate it?”

  Gideon slumped into a chair, scrubbing at his hair. “Nope. Whoever’s tied to this source has insane magic. It’s making the potions themselves shift and change in their bottles, just as we’re figuring them out!”

  “Kind of like a Jinn got involved, huh?”

  He sighed. “Maybe.”

  I glanced around the table. “Another reason to take Malda down. Where’s Matthias with the coffee?”

  “He’ll be down shortly,” Jack said. “Had to change shirts.”

  “Oh?” Theiya raised an eyebrow.

  “Zack puked on him,” she said with a touch of defiance.

  “Indeed.”

  Another glance at Gideon. He gave a tiny wrinkle of his nose. No dice. Whatever Matthias had been up to, it had involved Jack and had nothing to do with the twins. But that was firmly in the box of ‘don’t go there.’ Especially not with a malevolent Jinn Lady to kick out of the Fae court.

  I cleared my throat. “All right, I have the plans. We’ll start without coffee.”

  Leadership meant sacrifice.

  Chapter 21

  Going to a Fae gala was the new style of warfare. Not kidding. After the Blood Wars, the decentralized Fae courts put a kibosh on physical combat. Thanks to the new rules about inclusive court membership, the additional beefing up of security, and the institution of blood binders like Cendric and myself, violence had gone way down. It’d taken about a century for the Fae to get the hang of it, but the increase in the human population and the mutual desire not to let the humans have all the toys forced the various races to work together.