All Horns & Rattles: A Baxter Boys Novel

by Jane Charles

  “I need to go over plans.” Sean heads back to the dining room table where all kinds of papers are spread out.

  “Kels and I are going to be upstairs, but let us know if you need anything.”

  “Thanks.”

  Dylan grabs my suitcase. “I’ll show you your room.”

  He leads me up the worn, wooden stairs and heads down the hall at the landing instead of going up another flight, and turns into a room to his left. I follow him inside. The blonde, who I recognize as Mary, is just finishing making the bed

  “Hey.” She gives me a great big friendly smile. “I’m Mary.”

  Then she gives Dylan a look. “I’ll be studying if you need anything.”

  They are welcoming but giving me space. I like that. Or, maybe they are pretending to be welcoming, but getting away from me.

  “Did Miguel really visit you?”

  “Yeah.” He laughs. “Nice guy.”

  “Did he tell you he wanted me to live here?”

  “I told him I wanted you to live here and that I had a room, but since you had him I wasn’t so worried.”

  So, Miguel hadn’t been planning on me coming here. He was really kicking me out. A punch to the gut. I misbehaved and lost a good home. Just like I was always afraid of happening when I was a kid and found myself in a really good one.

  “He also said you needed to be here. That you would be here, and that he was bringing you tomorrow whether you liked it or not. I told him it needed to be your choice but he claimed it was his.”

  I sink down onto the bed. It’s really soft. Tonight, tomorrow, I guess it doesn’t make any difference. Miguel had already decided to kick me out before he ever caught me and Tex on the couch.

  “He wasn’t supposed to be back from Florida until tomorrow.” I never did ask him why he came back early. “He kind of caught me and Tex on the couch.” My face starts to heat. “He didn’t like what he saw and thought we should be separated.” It’s easier than spilling the whole thing.

  Dylan chuckles. “He did kind of strike me as old fashioned. But the couch, really?”

  “He wasn’t supposed to be home,” I defend. “We were the only ones there.”

  “So, because you are sleeping with a guy you have to leave?”

  “That and he thinks I should be with family.” I shrug. “You’re not going to get all protective, are you?” I am so past the point of being treated like a child.

  “You’re 18. He’s your best friend. What business is it of mine? But, I would like to meet him.”

  “You will at some point, I guess.” At least I won’t have to deal with old-fashioned values here.

  He puts my suitcase on the bed and unzips it. “Why don’t you get unpacked?”

  I’m not sure I can unpack again. The one time I did, I was packing up again, not even a full month later. “I’ll get it later.”

  “You can’t live out of a suitcase.” He tosses back the lid and stops.

  “I know it’s not neat. I kind of just threw everything in there.”

  Dylan doesn’t say anything about my wadded-up clothing. Instead, he picks up the teddy bear. “You still have this?”

  “It’s what I took and it’s what I’ve kept.”

  Then he sees the tapes and picks them up. A small smile forms.

  “I’m missing Cyndi Lauper. Jade was listening to it when the cops came.”

  “All I have is the photo.”

  “You want the tapes?”

  “No. You keep them.” He chuckles and then clears his throat. “Let me show you the bathroom. Only you and I share it, and Mary when she’s here.”

  “Does she sleep over a lot?”

  “Sometimes. Or, I go there, but never during the week.”

  “Why?” I ask as I follow him down the hall.

  “Last semester of college. She’s working on her bachelor’s in nursing and doesn’t want me bothering her when she needs to study and sleep.”

  “You love her?”

  “Yeah. More than I thought possible to love someone who wasn’t blood.” He stops inside the bathroom. “This is it.”

  I go in and look around. “Wow! This place is cleaner than any other place I’ve been.”

  “That’s on me. I’ve had a cleanliness issue since we were kids. Can’t stand clutter, dust or anything like that.”

  “I totally get that. As far as I’m concerned. If it doesn’t fit in my suitcase or my bag, I don’t need it.” I look at the shiny tub and sink. “But, I’m not this clean.”

  “You don’t need to be. I’m just glad you are here.”

  I look up at him. “Me too.” And in that moment I am. Miguel has his reasons and it has nothing to do with me being bad and getting kicked out. It wasn’t betrayal like I originally felt. In his heart, he really thinks he’s doing the right thing for me. Not rejection, but love.

  “How is she?” I demand when Miguel comes back in. I’ve wanted to text and call Nina since they left, but I didn’t want to do that if she was still with Miguel, and I have no fucking clue where Dylan lives. I know Nina showed me his address, but it isn’t like I committed it to memory or anything. Then I didn’t want to bother her if she was settling in with her brother.

  “She’ll be fine.”

  “How can you even know that?”

  “Her brother loves her.”

  “That doesn’t mean he’ll treat her right.”

  “Tex!” Miguel snaps. “Settle down. This is for the best. For Nina and for you.”

  Miguel isn’t going to change his mind about Nina and Dylan being together. He’s dug in on that one, but how the hell do I fit in? “How could this possibly be best for me?”

  “Because you aren’t doing this right!”

  Actually, I think what we were doing was more than right.

  “Neither one of you are going to work on Saturday night anymore.”

  “Who is going to cover? Joel and Ian can’t work those nights and you always want one of us there.”

  “I will. This is too important.”

  “Why Saturday?”

  “Nina won’t have practice or games. It’s the only night she’s free so the two of you will date.”

  “Okay.” I can’t really argue with that plan.

  “And no dating during the week. Maybe Sunday afternoon, but that is it.”

  “Come on, Miguel. We aren’t kids.”

  “You have school,” he orders. “You are not going to neglect your studies because of a girl and Nina needs to spend time with her brother.”

  “I think we are both old enough to manage our time.”

  “Do not argue with me,” he yells.

  Crap. He’s still really pissed. “I don’t care what year it is or what you kids think is okay. You will not be treating Nina like that. You will do this right. If you love her and want her, you will date her and respect her.” He starts walking toward his room. “Now get downstairs and on the desk so Ian and Joel can get to their other job.”

  “How come you don’t yell at other people who are carrying on?”

  He stops, but doesn’t turn around. “Because you and Nina are my family. I love you. The others, they can screw up their own lives but I won’t let you two do the same.”

  His words deflate all my anger. “Love you too, Miguel.”

  “Now get down there,” he barks.

  Grabbing my phone and laptop I head out. I don’t need to be told a third time. My head ain’t that thick.

  “Hope Miguel didn’t interrupt anything.” Joel is grinning at me when I get to the front of the gym.

  “A little heads up would have been nice.”

  “Dude, I sent you a text.”

  I look at my phone. The ding I ignored. Miguel is back. Headed your way. “Shit.”

  “Too busy to look?” he laughs.

  “Something like that.” Not that it would have made any difference. Miguel had already made his mind up that Nina was going before he walked in that door.

&n
bsp; “Hey, we gotta get going or we are going to be late for our other jobs.”

  “Sure. Sorry.” My response is a little absent but I don’t think they cared since they hightailed it out of the gym.

  Is she okay?

  Do I call her?

  Do I interrupt the bonding with the brother, or is she curled up in her room with an unpacked suitcase?

  This whole turn of events makes me sick to my stomach. I get that Miguel thinks he’s doing the right thing, but he doesn’t know the things I do about Nina. What if she’s armored herself up for good? Forever?

  Am I going to have to go back to working on removing it again one day a week and sometimes on Sunday?

  I can’t just fucking sit here and worry. Logging into Facebook I send her a message.

  * * *

  Tennyson “Tex” Lippincott

  How ya doing

  * * *

  Minutes pass and there is no reply. She does know that she can get onto Facebook and messenger from her phone, doesn’t she?

  Unless she hasn’t set it up yet.

  I grab my phone and send her a text.

  * * *

  Tex: How you doing?

  * * *

  Complete silence.

  After an hour, I can’t take it anymore and just call her.

  No answer and her voicemail hasn’t been set up.

  This is going to be a long, fucking night. If I don’t hear from her soon, I might have to just go looking for her as soon as I can close the gym. Dylan’s address is in his personal information, along with his phone number. Who the hell shares that personal stuff?

  A guy who is trying to find his family.

  Well, if I don’t hear from her by eleven. She’ll be hearing from me.

  At 10:45 she finally responds:

  * * *

  Nina: Good. Forgot I had a phone. Sorry

  * * *

  I didn’t realize just how tense I was getting waiting to hear from her.

  * * *

  Tex: I was worried about you

  Nina: Don’t. It’s all good

  * * *

  That is really hard to believe with the way she left here and since I can’t see her face, I don’t know if she’s just saying what she thinks everybody needs to hear to keep them at a distance.

  * * *

  Nina: I unpacked

  * * *

  That’s good, at least. I think.

  * * *

  Tex: See you tomorrow?

  Nina: M gave me the day off

  * * *

  Does that mean I won’t see her at all? How the hell am I going to know if she is okay if I can’t look into her eyes?

  * * *

  Tex: You can still come in

  * * *

  Or, I can go there.

  * * *

  Nina: Need to spend time with D. I’ll see you Monday

  * * *

  And with that, I’m shut down.

  Shit! Am I on the way to losing her?

  * * *

  Tex: We have a date next Saturday

  Nina: Is that your way of asking me out?

  * * *

  She’s getting cheeky, I think. That’s good. I think.

  * * *

  Tex: Sorry. Nina, would you do me the honor of going out with me next Saturday?

  * * *

  That’s an invitation even Miguel would approve of.

  * * *

  Nina: Why Tex, you’re so sweet. I’d love to go out with you

  Cheeky. All is not lost.

  Tex: We’ll make plans when I see you

  Nina: Sounds good

  Tex: Call if you need me

  Nina: I will

  Tex: Love you

  Nina: Love you too

  * * *

  With a smile, I put my phone down. At least she is okay for now and I’ve got to accept that. But Sunday is going to be a hell of a long day without her, and sleeping alone again is really going to suck.

  43

  I’m itching to run, but there is still a shitload of snow out there and I’m pretty sure you can’t even find the paths in the park.

  At least I won’t have to walk as far to run anymore, so that’s kind of nice.

  Pushing the covers away, I get out of bed and pad over to the window. It looks out onto another building but I lean against the glass and try and look down to the street. The sidewalk looks pretty clean, but there could be hidden ice too.

  Do I risk it?

  I’ve got to do something. I can’t just lay around in a strange house.

  Dylan gave me a key last night, so I could come and go as I need to, but it still feels weird.

  Maybe a walk. Get to know the neighborhood. Find out where the subway stop is. Important things like that.

  After pulling on my warmest running clothes, I tiptoe down the stairs and out the front door. I don’t want to wake anyone this early. Not that it’s early to me. Hell, it’s eight, I’ve hardly ever slept past six, but Dylan and I sat in the living room last night and talked. Then Mary joined us, followed by Sean, Alex and Kelsey. At about two, Zach, Christian and Ryan wandered in. I had to take a double look at Zach because at first I thought one of the guys brought a girl home. He was barely recognizable. Beautiful, but he sure as hell didn’t look like a man in drag. Well, until he pulled off his wig and hung it on a hook by the fireplace. After Dylan gave him a reprimanding look, he grabbed it and headed upstairs, only to come down like fifteen minutes later with his face makeup free.

  All of us talked until about three, with me getting to know them and them getting to know me, and I was feeling a hell of a lot more comfortable living here by the time I went up to bed. I’m happy that Dylan found a family. They aren’t blood, but they might as well be. He was lucky to end up where he did, otherwise, he might very well have ended up in prison.

  I sure missed Tex last night, though. The bed was lonely and it wasn’t just a sex thing. I missed him curled around me. Maybe our Saturday date should be a hotel, where we won’t be bothered and I can sleep with him spooned around me. That would be really nice.

  Just past Dylan’s street on the way to the park are a bunch of shops and a grocery store. It’s a quaint pocket that’s real quiet like. Of course, it is Sunday morning and not much is open. After stopping and getting a coffee, I head further out, taking in the area. The subway stop is just a few blocks from the brownstone so that’s kind of nice. When I get to the park it’s just what I expected. All of the paths are buried in snow.

  As much as I’d like to run, it doesn’t really bum me out. The walk was good and I got to know the area. All in all, it was a good outing.

  Kelsey and Alex are sitting at the dining room table when I get back. He’s sketching and she’s working on a laptop.

  “Hey.”

  Kelsey looks up and her eyes widen. “Hey, can you give me your opinion? I’m trying to set up the website for Just Ink About It.”

  Considering I spend probably less time at a computer than almost anyone in the world, I’m not sure I’m the best person to ask, but I go over there.

  “I have the main page for the shop and then each artist has their own page with bio and pictures of their art. Can you go through and see if it looks okay to you?”

  “Sure.”

  She gets up and I take her seat. I click through it all pretty quickly, when I really want to spend time looking at the art. I do want a tattoo after all. “Looks good to me.”

  “Great!” Kelsey reaches around and clicks on the icon to “publish”.

  “Mind if I look through it again?”

  “Why?” she asks alarmed. “Was something wrong that you didn’t tell me about?”

  “No.” I laugh. “I’ve been thinking about getting a tattoo.”

  Alex looks up with interest. “What kind?”

  “Rattlesnake and skull. Cattle skull, not human.”

  He nods. “American traditional?”

  I don’t think I want the color.
“Black and grey.”

  He flips the paper on his sketchpad to a clean sheet. I don’t know Alex all that well, but I’m getting to know him and this is a personal tattoo. It would be kind of nice if a stranger wasn’t doing it. Besides, when we were talking last night, the guys told me how they all met at Baxter Academy of Arts, a high school or the troubled and talented, and that they had all been in the system, some having a rougher time than others. Kelsey even told me about having a baby at sixteen and giving it up for adoption. They all have scars. Some on the inside and some on the outside. Alex won’t ask questions or pry if I show him mine. None of them will, and he’ll get it if I don’t want to talk about it.

  “Where at?”

  “Thigh.”

  “Stand up and show me.”

  So I get up and put my hands around the area I want covered. He takes a piece of paper and traces an outline. “It would be better if it was on skin and not your thick running pants so I know what size to draw.”

  Am I ready to show him the scars yet? Like right now? Dylan hasn’t even seen them. Only Tex. Hell, I’m not sure I even want Dylan to know about them. He’s still carrying a lot of guilt that isn’t his to carry.

  But, if I want this tattoo done, I’d rather it be done by someone I know and I’m kind of starting to trust. “I’ll be right back.” With that, I head up the stairs and change into a pair of shorts and go back and show him what I want covered.

  Neither he nor Kelsey say anything at first and I’m wondering if this was a mistake. I’m pushing my comfort zone with Dylan and his friends, but I really want this tat. Plus, Tex would want me to trust them. Of course, Tex is a hell of a lot quicker to trust than I’ve ever been. But, this is my new place, at least for a while. And, Dylan is my brother, a connection I’m not going to let go of again. These guys are his family so if I’m going to try and put myself out there a little more, this is the place to start.