Irresistible: A Salvation Society Novel

by R. C. Stephens

  “What do I want?” I repeat, taking a step back.

  “Hi, Ms. Malone. It’s good to see you again.” Dylan waves to me.

  Am I supposed to be cool about this? She’s sixteen. She’s my baby.

  I finally rip my stare off my daughter and look at Dylan and say, “Hi.” Hating on her boyfriend will make her hate me.

  “Maybe you two should keep the music down. I need to go make dinner,” I say, my voice shaking. “Will you be joining us, Dylan?” I ask, looking at him while trying to force a smile. My instinct is to tell him to get out of here and never look at my daughter again. I continue to work against what every fiber in my body is screaming to do.

  “No thanks, Ms. Malone. I better be going,” he says, and I watch how my daughter gets all goo-goo-eyed over him. Gah!

  He walks over to Jess and kisses her on the lips. He whispers that he will call her later, and then he says ’bye to me.

  Slow, deep breaths.

  He grabs his coat and walks down the stairs. I stand with each of my fists on a hip, staring at my daughter like I don’t know her.

  When the front door closes, I walk into her room. Her bed isn’t made, and I can’t bring myself to sit there. I take a seat at her desk chair instead and pinch the bridge of my nose. I close my eyes for a moment, because this day is giving me whiplash.

  “Please tell me you did not have sex with that boy,” I say.

  “Mom,” she chides me.

  “Jess, you’ve known him all of a few weeks,” I say.

  My daughter looks down at her feet. “I really like him. I’m going to be seventeen in a few months. It’s not a big deal.”

  I feel steam pressing through my ears. My body is vibrating with anger but more so, fear.

  I inhale and exhale, fighting to keep my tone even. I don’t want to yell at my daughter. “It is a big deal. We’ve discussed this. Sex should be with someone you love.”

  “Well, I love him,” she says.

  “Oh, dear child. You’ve known him a few weeks. Your virginity isn’t something you can just take back. That boy is going to be a memory to you forever,” I say.

  “I’m not you,” she shouts at me. “You live your life alone, and that’s your choice. I don’t even understand why you live the way you do; it’s pathetic. This whole situation. Living here with them is pathetic,” she screams in my face, and I feel her words like a slap across the face.

  I don’t realize I’m crying until I have tears streaming down my face. “I live here because I wanted you to have an easy life. For you to have enough money to pay for college and buy yourself a small place. Do you know how much easier that makes life? I didn’t bring a man into our life because I worried that no one was good enough to be your father. We were a team and we were good together. I didn’t want to start another family because I feared you would feel left out. I . . . did everything I could to keep you happy,” I say, as all my energy deflates. By the time I’m finished my rant, tears continue to pour down my face and snot runs from my nose. I don’t think I’ve ever really cried in front of Jess. Well, maybe when Liam died, but she was small back then.

  Jess is crying too. “I’m sorry, Mom,” she says, and she rushes into my arms.

  I hug my daughter tight. I thought staying here provided us with stability but now I see that living here has been more of a safeguard for me. I didn’t have bills to stress about and Jess wasn’t alone when she came home from school, but I also have been living half a life, which is a bad example for my daughter.

  “It’s okay.” I hug her close and kiss the top of her head. “We are going to be okay. You’re right. I’ve made some mistakes along the way. I’m not perfect, but I do love you dearly.”

  “I know. I love you too,” she says through her tears. I pull back and look into her red eyes and blotchy face, knowing I must look the same way. We both burst out laughing.

  “I’ve just been feeling overwhelmed, and I like Dylan. He makes me feel good,” she says.

  “I understand. I just want you to have respect for yourself. To know that sex should be about love,” I say.

  “It really isn’t everything it’s cracked up to be,” she says.

  “D-does that mean you had sex with Dylan?” I ask, holding my breath so hard that pressure builds in my chest.

  “Almost . . . but no.” She shakes her head.

  I let out a long, harsh breath. I kiss her forehead.

  “Your timing was close though. I got caught up in him,” she says.

  “Yes, but you want to be able to respect yourself after that feeling is gone,” I say.

  “I know. You’re right. I’m not completely sure I would have gone through with it,” she admits. She looks so young and vulnerable, yet I am also proud that she has a good head on her shoulders. That she was thinking and not only acting.

  “Oh, baby. Life is so complicated, I get that, but sex should really be about love,” I say.

  “Thanks for being so understanding,” she says, giving me an impish smile.

  “Always.” I kiss her again. My baby is growing up. It hasn’t really sunk in until now.

  “Dylan’s really sweet. Maybe he can stay for dinner some other time and you can get to know him or something,” she says.

  “Sure, I’d like that,” I say. “I’ll go get dinner ready.”

  “Okay. You looked really scary, Mom,” she says.

  Oh, if she only knew how I felt inside.

  “You’re okay, right?” I confirm, just to make sure.

  “I’m good. Thanks for being so understanding,” she says.

  “Of course, baby.”

  My daughter is growing up and everyone reminding of that fact is right. I need to get a life.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Bennett

  I’ve been waiting all day to call her. Wondering if she is okay. If I somehow got her into trouble because I can’t control what I feel around her.

  I dial her number. A text message won’t do it for me. I need to hear her voice.

  “Hello?” she says.

  “It’s Bennett,” I say.

  “How are you?” she asks. Her voice sounds low and dreary.

  “Getting there,” I say. “What’s going on? Did something happen?” I don’t know if she will like me being this direct, but I can’t help it. She sounds sad as hell.

  She laughs but it’s a melancholy laugh. “I got a slap on the wrist at work today. My supervisor said you can no longer be my patient.”

  “Damn, I’m sorry. What happened though? I never said anything, and we were discreet.”

  “Honestly, she said one of the night nurses had suspicions and brought her concern to Kathy. I know who it is. At least, I’m pretty sure I do,” she says.

  “Nurse Monica,” I answer. “She was behaving weird after you were in my room. I don’t mean to sound like a prick, but I think she was hoping to win over my affections.”

  “I have a feeling it was Monica, too. It makes me so angry that she did that. I wish she would have come and spoke to me, even though I know that isn’t how a woman like her would do things. Now my co-workers will know I had a patient taken off my roster. It just makes me look bad. I mean, thankfully, I’m not getting fired, I just . . .”

  “Look, I want to say that I’m sorry for causing you trouble but I’m not sorry for meeting you, for being attracted to you. I’ve never met anyone like you, and I want to get to know you better,” I say, laying my heart on the line. “Tell me you’re feeling something too.”

  “I feel it,” she says so softly. I imagine my fingers outlining her soft lips as she speaks.

  “I almost died.” My voice cracks. “I’ve lost friends and . . . I’ve been given another chance at life. When I first woke up after all my surgeries, I wanted to die. I had no reason to live, and then this sweet therapist with a heart of gold helped me with the pain. Got me to see how special she was . . .” What am I doing?

  What feels right.

  “Ben
nett . . . I’m feeling this too, but my life is complicated. You know I have a teenage daughter and—”

  “And I love that you’re such a good mom. That you care so much about your daughter. In the little time we’ve known each other, I know that about you for sure. That makes me want you more. I don’t know if I sound like a crazy person. Gosh, Avery, I never thought about kids or a serious relationship until you,” I say. She’s quiet. “I’ve hijacked this conversation and I need you to say something.” I laugh, but it’s insecure because I’m completely out of my element.

  “I feel something too. I’ve been alone since my husband died, and I was okay with that. Then you became my patient and I was just so drawn to you too. I want to get to know you better, but I can’t visit you in the hospital anymore. Our conversations need to be kept to the phone. I can’t risk my job.”

  “I know. I’m good with that. I’m going to work hard on my therapy, even though I loved working with you. I loved the way you got close to me and I could smell your hair, look into your eyes,” I say, picturing her tiny button nose, rosy lips and soft, blond hair.

  “I think you’ll be working with Rob now,” she says. “You’ll be in good hands with him.”

  “I don’t like the sound of that, but I’ll take it. I need to get better and figure out what I’m supposed to do with the rest of my life.”

  “You’ll figure it out. I haven’t known you long, but I can see you’re a fighter and you go after what you want. You’ll be just fine, Bennett Sheridan,” she says.

  “Thanks. That means a lot,” I say with a smile even though she can’t see me. Talking to her makes me feel at peace. “Avery? I don’t mean to pry, but is something else going on? I mean, is something else bothering you?”

  She giggles. “Do you have a sixth sense or something?”

  “Maybe,” I say, my voice flirtatious.

  “Just had an overwhelming night with my daughter too but we’ve figured things out,” she says.

  “I’m glad. I can imagine being a single mom isn’t easy,” I say.

  “No, definitely not, and tonight was one of those trying nights. I need to make some changes in my life,” she says, and I hear her yawn.

  “You’re tired. I don’t want to keep you,” I say.

  “Have a good night. I’m glad we had a chance to talk,” she says.

  “I think you should take my cell number. If you need anything, I want you to call me. You can input me on your phone using a pseudonym,” I say, and give her my number. “So what are you going to call me?”

  She laughs. “I don’t know. I haven’t come up with anything yet.”

  “Let me help you then. What do you think of Rambo or Superman?” I ask.

  She laughs; it’s such a sweet sound. “What was your call sign in the navy?”

  “I don’t think we are at the point of our relationship where I should share that,” I answer, knowing I pretty much set myself up for that one. Did I really just tell her we are in a relationship?

  “Aw! Now you’ve got me curious. Tell me now,” she says, her tone demanding and playful.

  “Fine, but don’t judge,” I warn.

  “You have my word,” she says.

  “When we were in boot camp, we were bored one night just lying around our sleeping quarters when this one guy pulled out a pellet gun. We made a game where we tried to shoot a bull’s-eye we set up on the wall. I had gone to the washroom in the middle of the game. As I was walking out, the asshole shot me in the butt. It was an accident, but the name stuck. It’s . . .” Don’t tell her. You want to win this woman over, not scare her off.

  “You can’t just stop there. I’m guessing it has something to do with your butt.” She laughs.

  “Fine. Here goes . . . it’s Asshat,” I say, pinching my eyes shut. “I’d really like to see the look on your face now that I’ve made a fool of myself.”

  “You’re adorable, Asshat.”

  “Hell, no. You aren’t calling me that,” I say.

  “Fine. Fine.” She laughs even harder.

  “I love that sound,” I say into the phone. She stops laughing. “I said that because I didn’t want you to stop,” I chide.

  “You’re so sweet. What should I call you?” she asks.

  “How about The Mechanic?” I ask.

  She giggles. “Are you a mechanic?”

  “No, but I can fix whatever you have broken,” I say.

  “That was seriously cheesy,” she says.

  “Agreed. I’m still trying to recover from the fact you know my name is Asshat. Other than the guys, no one knows.”

  “Your secret is safe with me,” she says. “I’ll put you in my phone as Patricia.”

  “That’s a woman’s name,” I say.

  “I know but the point of putting a different name is to throw people off. That way, if my phone lights up with the name Patricia, no one will think it could be you,” she says.

  “Brilliant,” I say.

  “Bennett?” She says my name like a question.

  “Yes, Avery?”

  “Thank you,” she says.

  “For what?”

  “For making me feel better,” she says and yawns again.

  “Anytime, day or night. Call me,” I say.

  “You too,” she says.

  “Have sweet dreams, princess,” I say.

  “You too,” she sighs, and we end the call.

  That went so much better than I could have ever imagined.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Avery

  Two weeks have flown by in a blur. I still go into the hospital to visit with patients in the evenings. I’ve managed to stay cordial with Monica. I also manage to have a phone call with Bennett every night before I go to sleep.

  I wish I could see him more. At least we sneak peeks at each other when he’s at the gym working with Rob on his therapy. I’ve learned so much about him at night when we talk in the dark. He has a bachelor pad in Virginia Beach that he stays at when he’s off-duty. He loves to eat steak and mashed potatoes. He doesn’t care for a tossed salad but doesn’t mind to eat steamed vegetables. He doesn’t know what he’s going to do with his life now, and he feels like he doesn’t have much to offer me.

  I’ve never had such intense phone conversations with anyone before. He’s gotten under my skin in the best way, and I don’t want whatever is happening between us to end. When I hear him breathe into the phone and say how he wants to kiss me, it makes me so hot and bothered. Then I get to the hospital in the morning and I just want to go to him and jump his bones. He’s awakened something inside me that has been dormant a long time. He’s also up and walking with a cane now, and he’s doing much better mentally too.

  I head over to the rehabilitation office to check in with Kathy.

  “Hey there.” She smiles. “You’re looking flushed this morning.”

  “Just came from the gym. Did a spin class. I swear it takes a couple hours for my cheeks to be less rosy when I do those classes,” I say.

  “We’ve got a big day ahead of us. Full roster of patients, then the whole department is pitching in to help set up the dinner tomorrow,” she says. It’s Thanksgiving tomorrow, and a lot of staff are off for the holiday.

  “I’m glad to help out,” I say.

  “Thanks. Will you be coming into the hospital for the dinner?” she asks.

  “Yeah, Jess and I will be eating here, and I have some friends coming from out of town that will join us too. My friend’s husband was a SEAL; he was on the same team as Liam,” I say.

  “That sounds lovely, Avery,” Kathy says.

  “How about you?” I ask.

  “Got my in-laws coming in from Philly tonight. And Arnie’s brother, wife and kids are joining us, too. We’re going to have a houseful.”

  “Do you have all the cooking done?” I ask.

  “No. I’m heading out of here early today. Probably going to end up spending half the night cooking,” she says.

  I lo
ok at my watch. “I better head to the gym. I have a patient in a few.”

  I head to the gym. Sutton is already waiting for me. “How’s it going?” I ask him.

  “All good,” he says. He wheels himself and I walk over to a set of bars. I help him get a grasp on one and he begins his reps. When he’s done and out of breath, he looks at me and says, “Patricia is doing just fine. She can’t wait to see you at the dinner tomorrow night.”

  My eyes feel like they will bug out of my head.

  “Don’t worry. I would never tell a soul,” he says. “I knew it from that night you wanted to watch a rom-com. There was something different about you,” he says.

  “Sutton, we need to keep it down,” I say.

  “You got it. By the way, it was Nurse Monica, you know. She has the hots for your man. I heard her talking to one of the other nurses, saying what a hottie he is and how it’s too bad he’s so injured because he must have been an animal in bed and that he will probably get back to it with a little help.” Sutton frowns.

  I do too.

  “I told him what I overheard. Just not the animal in bed part. I know what it feels like to be after an injury. He really likes you and he’s become a good friend. I’m allowed to be happy for my friends, right?” He smiles sadly.

  “Absolutely. I want to hug you right now, but I also don’t want to lose my job. I’m going to miss your face around here,” I say.

  “I’m going to miss you too,” Sutton says. “A large part of my recovery and my mental state is thanks to you.”

  “You’re going to do great out there; I just know it,” I say.

  “It’s going to be challenging. In here, I have my routine down pat. I just need to figure out how to navigate around people in the real world. They will treat me as incompetent,” he says, and my heart breaks.

  “People don’t understand injuries. When they see people in a wheelchair, they will think certain things, but I do believe that there are people that will see past it. That will get to know you and see how capable you are, and what a nice guy you are,” I say.