The Dissolution of Unrequited (The Science of Unrequited Book 4)

by Len Webster

  It hurt so damn much to see him not care.

  It was her graduation day.

  In a few weeks, she was supposed to be at Stanford to watch him graduate. She wasn’t sure if he even wanted her there. Evan hadn’t sent her a ticket. She had sent him one to her graduation almost a month ago.

  Taking a deep breath, she unlocked her phone and pressed on her call history. All her outgoing calls were to him. He had called her once, and that conversation only lasted a few minutes. She heard the hurt in his voice he tried to hide from her. Alex pressed on his number and held the phone to her ear as it rang.

  And rang.

  And rang.

  “Please pick up,” she begged.

  “Hey.” Her heart’s beats increased as relief consumed her. Just as she was about to tell him how happy she was to hear his voice, she heard, “You’ve reached Evan. Sorry I’m not here right now. Leave me a message.”

  Beep.

  Alex let out a sigh.

  She wanted to cry.

  She wanted to yell.

  But most of all, she felt foolish for thinking he’d pick up. So she’d leave him a final message and let him decide where they stood.

  Gripping her phone tightly, she exhaled a heavy breath. “Hey, it’s me. I know it’s too late for you to be at Duke right now. If you were going to be here, you would have been by now. Something’s not right with us, Evan. It hasn’t been since that fight. You don’t want to talk. Well, then maybe you’ll just listen. I have to hope you’ll listen. I don’t want Zürich, Evan. I don’t want to lose you. Not again. Not after everything. I spoke to Dr. Rodahawe after I came back to Duke and declined his offer. I want Massachusetts with you, and I am so sorry that I even considered Switzerland without you.” Alex reached up and brushed her tears from under her eyes, not allowing them to fall down her cheeks. “Even though you won’t be here to see me graduate, I’ll pretend you’re there in the crowd with my family. Call me when you can. I love you, Evan Gilmore. I love you so much. It’ll always be you before anyone or anything else.”

  Alex hung up and set her hands in her lap, wondering how it all went wrong. If she had known over two years ago that the application she sent would affect them like this, she would have never sent it and avoided all of this. She’d have never hurt her boyfriend. She’d never experience him not being at her college graduation. A knock on the door had her lifting her chin to find her father stepping into the room. He had a careful smile on his face as if he were cautious of saying something wrong.

  “Can we talk for a minute?”

  Alex nodded as she set her phone back on her nightstand. “Sure.”

  Her father closed the door, crossed the room, and sat on her bed with her. “It’s unbelievable to see how bare the apartment is now that you’re graduating.”

  She took in the room and agreed with a nod. “I just have a few things left to pack before we head back to Massachusetts. And thank Mr. Marlon for us for finding this place. It’s been incredible to live here for the past two years.”

  “I’ll tell him,” her father said as he slung an arm around her shoulder and brought her close. “I can’t believe you’re graduating college.”

  Alex laughed. “Yeah. I can’t believe it either.”

  Her father squeezed her shoulder before he dropped his arm from around her. “I’m so proud of you, Alexandra.”

  “Thanks, Dad.”

  “Are you going to be okay if he doesn’t show up?”

  Alex faced her father to find him expressionless. It was as if he was hiding his true feelings from her. So to assure him that she would be, Alex smiled. “I’ll be okay.”

  Her father sighed. “You would have been graduating from MIT had it—”

  “No, Dad,” she said, cutting him off. “We’re long past blaming Evan for something stupid I did during my senior year of high school. I chose Duke. I love Duke. And I might not have been accepted into MIT either. It wasn’t anyone’s fault but my own. I made the decisions. I chose for me, and in the end, I got it right because my roommate became my best friend. I wouldn’t have met Savannah had I gone to MIT.”

  He smiled. “Speaking of Savannah,” he said as he got up from the bed and pulled something out of his pants pocket and then returned to the bed. He handed Alex the piece of paper.

  Alex unfolded it to find that it was a check for her roommate. “Fifteen thousand dollars?” she breathed in disbelief.

  “I thought I’d ask you first if it was okay. I didn’t need Savannah to pay rent for this place, so I didn’t touch the money she was sending me. She sent more than she should have. Plus, she drove you around and paid for groceries, too. I rounded it up a bit, but I just wanted to make sure you were okay with me giving Savannah back her money.”

  She let out an unbelievable laugh as she gave the check back to her father. “She’ll say no, but I don’t mind at all, Dad.”

  Her father’s eyes softened as he pressed his lips in a tight line. “I’m sorry he’s not here, my love.”

  “Me, too,” Alex said. Her parents only knew snippets of her and Evan’s fight. She didn’t tell them about getting into the Rodahawe Institute. There was no point now that she had turned down the offer. They’d only be upset that she didn’t take it.

  She had her reason.

  And he was back in California.

  “Your mother and I don’t have to go to his graduation at Stanford.”

  Alex shook her head. “No. He invited you both. Our rough patch shouldn’t get in the way of you two seeing him graduate from college.”

  “You really do have a kind heart, Alexandra,” her father said. He leaned forward, pressed a kiss on her forehead, and smiled down at her. “I’m so proud to be your father. I’ll let you have a minute and meet you outside.”

  “Okay,” Alex said before her father slipped out of her room, leaving her alone. She got off her bed and walked to her bathroom. Once she turned on the light, she approached the counter and took in her reflection in the mirror.

  Alex ran her fingertip underneath her eye and fixed the small smudge of eyeliner. She sighed once more before she put her broken heart and disappointment in a box and locked it away for the day.

  Only for today.

  So she could enjoy the fact she was graduating from Duke.

  Alex smiled as she took a photo with Tammy, a friend from one of her physics classes. Tammy had dated one of Alex’s friends, Mika, during their junior year of college, but they had broken up the summer before senior year. The breakup was apparently mutual, and both had remained friends, making it a little easier for Alex to hang out with them when they weren’t in class.

  “We’ll have to take another picture once the ceremony is over,” Tammy said as she adjusted her graduation cap on her head. Her blond curls shifted, and she combed her fingers through them to get them back to the way she had styled them.

  “Of course,” Alex promised as Mika Newman walked up to them.

  “Tam, you don’t mind if I borrow Alex for a second?” he asked. Mika had started off as Alex’s lab partner, but they became close friends. Besides Savannah, there was no one else she trusted more at Duke than Mika.

  Tammy shook her head. “I’m gonna go take a photo with the others before we have to line up.”

  Alex turned and smiled at him as he walked her to his parents who she had met several times during their visits to Duke. “Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Newman.”

  “Hello, Alex,” Mika’s mother said. “You look lovely.”

  “Thank you, Mrs. Newman,” she replied.

  “You don’t mind taking a picture with Mika? Just in case he runs off and we don’t get one with you.”

  Alex shook her head. “No, of course, not. I don’t mind at all,” she said as she wrapped an arm around Mika’s back and smiled at the camera his mother pointed at them. Spreading h
er lips into a smile, she watched Mrs. Newman take the picture and show her husband for his approval. He nodded, indicating that the photo was to his satisfaction.

  Just as she was about to pull away from Mika, she heard a familiar voice say, “Alex?”

  She froze.

  Disbelief washed over her.

  She couldn’t believe he was here right now.

  Turning away from her lab partner, she took him in. He was dressed the part of a guest in black dress pants and a white dress shirt. He even wore a Duke pin on his shirt. And in his hands was a bouquet of white tulips. Alex tore her eyes from the bouquet and looked at his light blue eyes.

  “Landon,” she breathed.

  “Hey, Massachusetts,” her ex-boyfriend greeted.

  Alex wasn’t going to lie.

  She felt her heart burst at the sight of him.

  Old memories flared in her chest.

  Maybe it was the fact that Evan wasn’t here to watch her graduate that made her feel grateful that Landon was standing in front of her.

  “I’m so sorry,” Alex said as she turned around and smiled apologetically at Mika and his parents for being so rude.

  Mika glanced over at Landon and then back at her. His expression was tight as if he were uncomfortable with Landon in their presence. Mika didn’t know the specifics of her rough patch with Evan, but she could tell he was not a fan of Landon’s. “That’s all right, Alex. I’ll see you in there?”

  “Yeah. I’ll see you in a minute.” Alex spun around and faced her ex-boyfriend. “What are you doing here?”

  Landon smiled that flawless smile as he handed her the bouquet. “Congratulations on graduating, Alex.”

  Her heart foolishly squeezed at his sweet gesture. “Thank you. But seriously, Landon. Why are you here?”

  “Some of my old Duke teammates are graduating.” His cheeks peppered with a blush as he scratched his head. “And, well, it was an excuse to see you graduate.”

  Alex was in utter disbelief. “You flew all the way from Phoenix to watch me graduate?”

  He nodded. “Yeah. I’m incredibly proud of you. I know that had you followed me to Arizona, you wouldn’t have graduated with Savannah and all your friends.”

  “How are you not mobbed by people right now?” She had no idea how the paparazzi or the other students didn’t surround him. He was the NBA Rookie of the Year in his first season with the Phoenix Suns. He had exceeded all the expectations set for him.

  His laugh was so warm and familiar. “People are too busy to notice. Listen, Alex, do you think we could go for a walk? For old time’s sake?”

  “Ahh …” She hesitated. A small part of her wanted to. He had been such a big part of her life when they were together, and she still thought of some of their moments together so fondly, but that didn’t mean she wanted to share her graduation with him. The one person she wanted to wasn’t with her, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t go on a walk with Landon.

  “Alexandra,” she heard her father say behind her.

  Her eyes widened, realizing they weren’t alone. That it was definitely a bad idea to go for a walk with him. Alex shifted as her parents and her grandparents stood next to her. “Landon, you remember my family.”

  From the corner of her eye, she noticed Landon nod. Then he stepped forward and held out his hand to her father. “Of course. Hello, Noel.”

  And to her surprise, her father shook her ex-boyfriend’s hand. “It’s good to see you, Landon. How’s the Suns?”

  “Amazing. Clara, you look as beautiful as ever.”

  Her mother smiled. “Thank you, Landon.”

  Then Landon shook hands with her grandfather Marcus and kissed her grandmother Louise’s cheek just as he had with her mother. “It’s good to see you all again.”

  Alex handed her father her bouquet. “Landon and I need to talk. We won’t be too long.”

  Concern washed over her mother’s face bright as day. But Alex didn’t have a rational reason as to why she wanted to catch up with him. It had been over two years since he broke up with her and chose his future. It had been over two years since she took him back and they almost had unprotected sex. But there was something gentle in his blue eyes. He wasn’t the Landon Carmichael she had once loved. The Landon Carmichael who had broken her heart and faith in him.

  He appeared as if he had changed.

  As she looked at her mother, she saw the confusion and disappointment consume the features of her face. There was a message to that expression. And Alex knew it was, “You have a boyfriend.”

  She was very aware that she had a boyfriend. And her going for a walk with Landon Carmichael had nothing to do with Evan Gilmore breaking her heart by not showing up. It had nothing to do with him. No one understood the relationship she had with Landon.

  It had been perfect … until it wasn’t.

  “I won’t be too long,” Alex promised. Then she smiled at her family, assuring them that nothing would happen with Landon. It was just a walk.

  For them to both say goodbye to Duke together.

  They had nothing to worry about.

  Because Landon Carmichael didn’t have her heart anymore.

  It was currently in Stanford.

  Where it always belonged …

  With Evan Gilmore.

  Other than the science department and the library, the Sarah P. Duke Gardens was one of Alex’s favorite parts of Duke. However, it held too many memories of her ex-boyfriend for Alex to visit after they broke up, so she didn’t. In the two and a half years since she and Landon had ended, Alex had never once visited the gardens. The last time she sat on this bench was with her ex-boyfriend. It was also the bench he had shown her when they had first taken a walk together during her freshman year of college. It was also the wooden bench that had hosted their first date.

  Now, it was the wooden bench where they’d say goodbye.

  She would be leaving Duke tomorrow once she finished packing her apartment.

  Her next and final stop was her home in Massachusetts. In a couple of weeks, she was supposed to be in California. But she wasn’t sure if Evan still wanted her at Stanford. She had to hope that he did, but Alex would be ready when Evan made the decision. To decide whether he wanted her at his graduation and whether he wanted a life with her after they finished college.

  “Alex?”

  She took her eyes from the tree she had been staring at and faced Landon. “Yeah?”

  He frowned. “You look miserable sitting here with me.”

  Alex shook her head. “Sorry. I’m not. I’m just tired.”

  “I know when you’re lying,” Landon said as he reached over and grasped her hand. Alex flinched. It had been so long since he last touched her, but she remembered his touch. Remembered how gentle he could be. Then she remembered the night of the lacrosse captain’s party. The night he had been so rough and forced his kisses on her.

  She cleared her throat and shook the memories away. “You do?” Alex asked, surprised.

  He nodded. “I was your boyfriend for almost a year, Alex. I know when you’re miserable. Are you okay?”

  A long time ago, she would have told him everything. But now, she couldn’t. It wasn’t right that she told him about her relationship with Evan. They were their issues, and Landon had no business getting involved. So Alex would lie.

  “After hating Duke, I’m going to miss this place.”

  Landon laughed. “Yeah. I miss this place, too.” He squeezed her hand. “But I only miss this place because I miss you.”

  Her stomach dropped as she pulled her hand free. “Landon…”

  “I do miss you, Alex.”

  She swallowed the lump in her throat as she felt the nervous tremors consume her. She saw the hope in his eyes and knew that she couldn’t let it bloom. Alex had to be honest. “Lando
n, I’m seeing someone.”

  He flinched. The pain bright on his face. “Is it … is it serious?”

  Alex nodded. “It is.”

  “As serious as when you and I were together?”

  “I love him, Landon.” She rested her hand in her lap, away from him.

  Landon rubbed his lips together as he glanced out at the gardens. Then he finally faced her. “And he loves you?”

  A small smile splayed on her lips. “He does.”

  “Is he here? Wait—” His eyes widened. “Are you dating Mika?”

  To her surprise, a laugh slipped past her lips. “No, I’m not dating Mika. We’re really good friends. But no, he’s not here at Duke.”

  Disbelief darkened his blue eyes. “Your boyfriend isn’t here to see you graduate?”

  “He’s busy.” It was all she could offer.

  Landon got up from the bench, shaking his head as fury consumed his face. “Why the hell isn’t your boyfriend here? What kind of guy are you dating, Massachusetts?”

  Alex sighed. “It’s complicated.”

  “How is it complicated? This is one of the most important days of your life!”

  She got off the bench and walked over to him, pressing her hands on his arms to get him to stop pacing. “Landon, I appreciate the concern, I really do. But what Evan and I—”

  Oh, no.

  “Evan?” Landon murmured, his face taut with pain. “You’re dating him?”

  “We’ve been together for almost two years,” she admitted, slightly afraid of how her ex-boyfriend would react to the news.

  Landon’s chin dipped. “Almost two years?”

  She could see him doing the math.

  He wondered if she cheated on him.

  “I know what you’re thinking, but no, I didn’t cheat on you. I was faithful. I was so in love with you. Evan and I got together during the summer before my junior year. He’s not here because we had a fight. He found out I got into the Rodahawe Institute.”

  “The Rodahawe Institute,” Landon breathed, pride now gleaming in his eyes. “You got in?”

  Alex tilted her head. “You know about the Rodahawe Institute?”