There was something about her…but he couldn’t figure what it was. He wasn’t one to bring home hurt animals or people. He thought maybe he was just concerned for her, but that wasn’t like him. He usually was drawn to women who were robust and not as thin. He banked the fire and laid out his bedroll under the wagon. Then he quietly rolled beneath the wagon and closed his eyes. He sure was tired.
He woke suddenly without realizing why and grabbed his gun, glancing in all directions to see who was around the wagon. But he didn’t see anyone. He listened for the sounds of footsteps but heard none. A moaning of pain reached him from inside the wagon. Someone must have gotten in there. He rolled out from his bed and stood with his gun still drawn. He stopped at the back of the wagon. The pain-filled noises grew louder. The canvas was still tied closed, so he quietly untied it and loosened the cinching so he could get in.
It was now silent except for the chirping of grasshoppers. He put one leg over the closed tailgate and then the other. Then he was wacked on the side of the head. He saw stars floating in front of his eyes. He gritted his teeth against the pain and tackled the man.
Once he had the man pinned, he realized it wasn’t a man. “Dawn?”
“I’m going to cut out your tongue and then burn your eyeballs. After that I’ll take one hand off and then the other. Get off me.” Her voice was low and entirely serious. It gave him a chill down his spine.
“Dawn, It’s me Heath. I do tend to talk too much, but no one had ever threatened to cut out my tongue before.” Still in his hold, her body relaxed.
“Get off me please.” Her voice shook.
Heath rolled off her. There wasn’t much room in the wagon and his shoulders still touched hers. He turned to his side and looked down at her. It was almost pitch black in the wagon, and it took a minute for his eyes to adjust.
“I was sleeping under the wagon, and I heard groaning. I thought someone was hurting you.”
“I woke when you untied the cinch. I grabbed a log of wood and hit you hard. Oh my, are you all right?”
He touched the side of his head and grimaced. “I saw stars for sure. It’s a bit tender. I’m just glad I didn’t pull the trigger.”
Her mouth formed an O. “I’m sorry I woke you. I didn’t think I made noise anymore. I used to cry all the time, but if I woke anyone, I was whacked. I doubt I’ll ever be a normal person again.”
“You’ve probably been through hades,” murmured Heath. “I can’t even imagine. Now we know I’m a light sleeper.”
“I don’t know, I can be loud. Oh, what if I woke others?”
“Don’t worry I didn’t see anyone when I jumped in here. I’ll just say goodnight then.”
“You don’t think anyone in the wagons will try to harm me, do you?” Her body tensed.
“No, besides they know one of us sleeps under the wagon. You’re safe.”
“One of us? I’d like to know who is under the wagon.”
“Fair enough. Tonight it’s me. Sometimes it will be Zander, and if we both have guard duty Declan will. Sometimes we switch in the middle of the night if the shifts run that way. We’ll keep you informed each day.” He inched to the back of the wagon. “Can you cinch this?”
She nodded.
“Goodnight.”
As he dropped to the ground, two shadows slid deeper into the darkness, but he didn’t see who it was. He walked in that direction but found no one there. Shrugging, he returned to the wagon and rolled back under it.
It took some time for sleep to come. Dawn’s fresh scent lingered in his memory. He thought her hair might have been lighter than the brown it was now, but he wasn’t sure. It had been dark. There was something about her that drew him. Sighing, he closed his eyes.
Chapter Three
Once she gathered her strength, she would walk. This jolting and bumping in the wagon was painful. Dawn sighed. She didn’t want to leave the safety of the wagon and the other people on the train didn’t want to see her. When she’d left for brief moments, eyes had widened and she saw a few men hover their hands over their guns.
She also wasn’t used to doing nothing. The Lakota had kept her busy every minute. She hardly had time to think about anything except for finishing the task she was given quickly and efficiently. Any delay was met with the switch against her, and Dancing Girl didn’t particularly care where she struck Dawn. Kills Many got upset only once, when her face was bruised.
As Dancing Girl’s slave, she had to have permission to do anything. If Dancing Girl decided not to feed her that day, Dawn went hungry. She’d slept outside the dwelling on many cold nights. It had been a hard life until Kills Many decided to take a liking to her. None of the other women were happy about it and burning her with fire sticks became their favorite thing to do.
Dawn’s thoughts drifted back to the present as she sat at the back of the wagon so she could see out. They passed a woman with her infant. Longing and loss filled her, and she let the tears fall. If she closed her eyes, she could clearly see Patricia being killed over and over. Her grief had never lessened for Patricia or Lincoln. There were many times she wished it had all been some horrible dream. Who could imagine such cruelties? How she’d endured, she hadn’t a clue.
Glancing at her hands she wondered if her skin would ever stop peeling. The sun hadn’t been a friend to her. She’d been horribly burned over and over as she was in the sun all day every day. Dancing Girl had laughed when she asked for a hat.
And now… it seemed everyone expected her to take a bit of time and then be normal. She didn’t know how to be normal anymore—or what normal even was. It wasn’t just a misfortune; most of her had died when her family was killed, and the rest of her had been beaten until she was afraid of her own shadow. She did learn how to keep her emotions tucked away. She always stood straight and tall no matter what. It wouldn’t have been a good idea to allow them to know she was shaking on the inside.
And now… She couldn’t just sit in the wagon. She had done nothing to be shamed for. There was work aplenty, and she could be of help. Maybe it would be easier to find sleep if she worked hard. But it was unsettling to have a man sleeping under her, even though she was aware that it made her safer from the others.
The sun had shifted and soon they would stop. She had a pretty green dress that Cora had given her, and she’d also given her a bonnet. It was a poke bonnet that wasn’t attractive but it kept the sun off her face and she treasured it. She even had shoes now.
Declan was driving, and he slowed the oxen and took their place in the circle of the wagons. He was a very nice man who treated Luella grandly. They were so in love it hurt to watch them. When the wagon stopped she lowered the tailgate and climbed out.
They would need plenty of buffalo chips. She hadn’t seen a tree all day though they weren’t very far from a river. She could smell the water.
“You can stay in the wagon if you rather,” Declan said kindly.
“Do I have to? I’d rather resume some activity.”
He smiled, a warm expression that showed in his eyes. “Whatever you feel up to. It’s good to see you on your feet. I know Luella enjoys your company.”
She smiled at him, and it felt strange on her lips. “You’re lucky to have each other.”
“I have plenty buffalo chips!” Luella’s eyes sparkled.
Declan’s lips twitched. “If I had known you’d be so happy about the chips I’d have given you them to you.”
Luella shook her head and put the chips next to where the fire would be lit. “How are you, Dawn? It’s good to see you up. Declan, could you get her a crate to sit on?”
“I would like to help today. I feel useless, and it’s not a good feeling.”
Luella nodded. “There was a bit of luck. The men hunting have enough elk for everyone.”
Dawn nodded. “That is a blessing. It will help me regain my strength. I’ll start the fire.” She was sore from being in the wagon. It was uncomfortable moving about so much, but it w
ould help her and she’d get stronger every day.
She set the tripod over the fire and put a big pot with water hanging from it. “What’s next?”
Before Luella had a chance to answer one of the drovers dropped a bit of elk at Dawn’s feet and then he threw the skin at her. “You can make yourself some new clothes.” He laughed as he rode off.
Blood from the skin splattered all over Dawn. She stood very still and then picked up the meat and washed it off. “There’s a river a mile or so from here. Could you get me the other dress you gave me? I’ll put it on after I wash.”
Luella looked as though she wanted to cry. She went into the wagon and carried out clothes, a flannel towel, and some soap. “You shouldn’t go by yourself.”
“I know how to take care of myself. Thank you.” Carrying the bundle, Dawn set out walking. She could feel people watching her, and she shook inside, but her knife, Swift Eagle had given her, was hidden in her stockings and she knew how to use it. It took a while of walking, but the water was there to greet her. Her heart lightened a bit. After glancing around, she undressed and got into the river with the soap.
It felt wonderful to be alone, and the river, though a bit strong, was refreshing. She was strong enough to stand against the current. She washed her dress and washed her body, taking delight in using the soap. But it was getting late, and she needed to walk back. She wrung out her dress and threw it near her clean clothes then climbed the bank, grabbed the towel, and began to dry herself.
Thundering hooves had her glancing up, startled. A horse and rider were headed her way. She didn’t dare drop her towel to dress, so she grabbed her knife and stood in the slight breeze waiting. Her body tensed, and all of her senses were heightened. She’d been a good pupil when watching the Lakota practice fighting, and she was exceptional with the knife.
She breathed a bit easier when she recognized Heath, but she kept her stance widened, ready if she needed to be. Her towel threatened to fall, and she quickly tucked it around her again.
“Hello, Heath. Out for a ride?” She kept her eyes on his face. She’d already noted his sidearm and rifle.
“Truthfully, Miss Dawn, I was sent to find you. Luella is positive you were either captured or dead. I guess you’ve been gone longer than she thought you’d be.”
A bit of guilt pricked her conscience. “I didn’t mean to worry her. The river was a bit farther than I thought and the water was delightful. It’s been a while since I’ve had soap.” She pushed a smile onto her face. “A man might not understand.”
“I do understand. I’ll turn around while you dress, lass.” He slide off the horse and held the reins as he stared in the direction of where the camp was.
His chivalry touched her. He’d make some woman a good husband.
“You do know it’s not safe to be here alone, don’t you?” he said.
“I’m fine. I’m very exacting with my knife. Learning to use it was hard. I usually ended up hard on my back. But the Lakota learn how to protect themselves when they are young.”
“If they let you have a knife, why didn’t you stab and run?”
“Where would I run?” A wry chuckle slipped out. “I wouldn’t have gotten anywhere before I was grabbed and tortured. If I was lucky they’d kill me.”
“That’s a good reason. Luella told me what happened and I’m sorry it happened to you.”
She finished dressing. “I’m clothed. I suppose it will be my life now. People will think me more Indian than white. It’s fine. At the end of the road I’m going to get some of that free land and grow everything I need. I’ll keep to myself, and I should be fine.”
He stared at her.
“What’s wrong?”
“You have blond hair,” he murmured. “I’d wondered…” He shook his head. “And you’re too faired skinned to be outside for long.”
“Sometimes you don’t get the luxury to sit in the shade.”
He walked closer to her. “Very true, and I know how much it can hurt. I’m sorry I’m staring. I’ve talked to you but usually in the evening. You are beautiful.”
She bowed her head. Then she stood straight and tall. “Get on with you. I’ll be right behind you.” She picked up her things and bundled them in the towel. Then she started to walk. She didn’t want to be beautiful. She just wanted to be unremarkable. It would be bliss to walk anywhere and not be noticed. She glanced up to heaven. You can’t change, what’s done is done.
“Dawn?”
“Sorry, I was wool gathering I suppose. Was there something you wanted?”
“I wanted to know if you wanted to ride the horse.”
“It’s a kind thing that you asked me, and I thank you. But I’ve found this walk to be very calming. There is no one but you and me out here. I can be unafraid—for the moment at least. I can pretend that all is well.” Tears stung her eyes. “Once I get back to the wagons I’ll be reminded that I have lived with the Sioux. I never learned to give the look of disdain that many in the party seem to have practiced repeatedly. I act as though I don’t hear them or see them but it chips away at my dignity every time. That’s all I have left. I put it on like a great cape, and I just hope it’s not so tattered and torn that it will be useless. I suppose I could always try to sew it back together, but I don’t think it an easy thing.”
“Doesn’t it get weary?”
“I suppose it does. It’s like trying to struggle upstream in a very strong current. You get knocked down. If you don’t get back up you’ll either drown or be pushed downstream, and sometimes downstream is worse than where you’re at. But there are times in life that there is nothing you can do to change fate. What happened simply happened, and it can’t be undone. I’ve railed at God so many times, but I’ve also praised Him. I’ve learned to try to live by the words I read in the Bible. The problem is the others. I can’t control anything.”
Heath made a noncommittal grunt.
It was nice to have him walking at her side instead of in front of her. She glanced at the horse. It was a fine dun he was leading. It would have been a good mount for the Lakota to steal.
He twisted his head and gazed at her. “The wagons are in sight, and I see your shoulders growing tense.”
“Yes, I need to stand straight and tall with my dignity wrapped around me and the tensing of my shoulders helps.” She smiled at him and then touched her lips. “I’m not used to smiling anymore. I’ve missed it. Will you stay with me until we get to the wagon? I’ve run the gauntlet once and that is enough for a lifetime.”
“Of course I will. Would you like me to punch the man who threw the bloody skin at you?” He raised his brow.
“No, revenge is better when it is unexpected. I’ve been taught many things but have never put them into practice. I believe some will find what happened to be funny and others will disapprove of it. With the Lakota, it would have been my job to clean and soften the skin. It’s hard work.”
“I don’t know about you but I’m hungry.”
Heath kept talking as they walked to their wagon, telling her silly stories about life on the wagon train. She knew he was deliberately telling her of the lighter things, there had been without doubt many troubles and tests had happened along the Oregon Trail, but he kept such dark tales to himself. He was a good man with a big heart.
* * *
Heath couldn’t keep his gaze off Dawn. He tried, and he tried hard. They were all seated around the fire eating dried apple cobbler.
“I heard you folks had some trouble,” Captain London said as he strode over to them. Luella quickly grabbed another crate for him to sit on.
“Can I tempt you with some cobbler, Captain?”
“I must confess I could smell it and it made my poor old full stomach rumble.”
Everyone laughed.
“I’ve had a talk with Chuck Klass, and he won’t bother you again, Miss Dawn.”
“Thank you.” She looked very uncomfortable.
“How’d you find out who
it was?” Heath asked.
“Luella gave me a description, and the lout was standing near the livestock bragging to some of the others. I just happen to be standing behind him. He’s been given extra guard duty. I wish I could have done more, but you can’t do much just because someone is meaner than a rattlesnake.” He dug into the cobbler Luella handed him. “This is good. My compliments, Luella.”
Declan put his arm around his wife. “I got lucky to marry such a wonderful wife.”
Everyone agreed, and Luella turned crimson.
There was a pause in the conversation. Then London spoke up. “I’d appreciate it if you all keep an eye out for Dawn here. People aren’t always as tolerant as I would like. Dawn, please don’t go anywhere alone.”
The flare of irritation in her eyes was gone so fast, Heath was sure he was the only one to catch it.
“Of course, Captain. Thank you for your consideration. I don’t plan to spend my days in the wagon anymore. I’ll stay close to it though.”
He finished eating and nodded. “I’m glad to hear it. We’ll be at a trading post in a few weeks. We can leave word that you’ve been found.”
“Thank you.” Her eyes locked with Heath’s. She had a serene appearance, but he knew she was hurting. She had no one who was looking for her.
The captain stood and tipped his hat to the two women. “Thank you for the wonderful food and delightful conversation.” He made his way to the next wagon.
“He’s right,” Declan said. “We need to keep our eyes out. I know we’ve been traveling with these people for months, but some I just don’t know if they can be trusted. We can rule out any of the married men. Their wives wouldn’t be so easy to forgive such a thing no matter how they personally felt.”
“We’ve been sleeping under the wagon,” Zander said.
“I know and thank you. I can take a turn if you have somewhere else you wanted to sleep,” Declan said with a teasing smile on his face.
“I’ll have to let you know. I haven’t had any invitations from the ladies yet.” Zander laughed. “I don’t mind. I did want to ask you one thing, Dawn. If you’re having a nightmare would you want to be woken? I haven’t known what to do some nights.”
Dawn’s Destiny: Romance on the Oregon Trail Book 3 Page 3