The Good Husband

by Lucian Bane

  ****

  “Wait!”

  Charlie stopped and turned, finding his mom frozen with a look of terror.

  “I’m…getting cold fee,” she gasped, bending over while gulping down air.

  “That’s not cold feet,” Charlie whispered, hurrying to her. “Do you want to wait? Maybe we can just go halfway today. A few feet each day. We do have four more weeks to work on it.”

  She grabbed hold of his arm, gripping tight. “Okay Charlie. Halfway today, okay. I agree.”

  She spun around and headed back the way they came, making him run to catch up. It hit him then. “Are you getting any exercise lately? I think you should. I think you should join me at the gym.”

  “You do?” She shot glances at him like she didn’t want to even look behind her. “I can, I can do that. I need to. Yes. Get rid of all the bad things building up. I have a lot of chemicals built up Charlie. A lot.”

  He wondered what that meant as they turned the first corner and she seemed to slow her pace a little. “Mom…you and dad were happy, right?”

  It was like watching her run into a literal wall. She stood there, staring at him like she’d been caught red handed in the middle of a murder. And then her face crumpled in on itself as she slowly fell to her knees. Charlie had never been so devastated over anything as he knelt next to her.

  He didn’t know what to do but he knew she was on the edge of everything. He hugged her and that seemed to be the right thing as she held him back like he was the only ledge in sight. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Charlie. I didn’t know, I didn’t know your dad loved me like he did. I was so mad, I thought he didn’t want me, so I started drawing away from him until we lived like friends, and he still loved me. Even though he did want me and thought he was doing what I needed him to. And then he’s dying, and I find out I was wrong about everything and that I’ve wasted all these years,” she wailed, clutching him tight. “I could have been loving him, and instead I was so distant, but not enough for you to see.”

  He realized he did see but thought it was normal. It wasn’t until he saw Alice’s mom and dad that his brain drew the comparison. “I didn’t really know, mom,” he said. “But you know now, and everything is going to be okay.”

  “If he lives,” she cried bitterly.

  “He’s alive,” Charlie said.

  “But for how long?” she cried back. “I’m sorry to doubt, but we’re not sure. And I don’t want to pray selfishly Charlie, I don’t, but I want him, I want him to live! I need him! I’m sorry, I’m selfish, but I just want a chance to love him. He deserves that! Your father is such a good, good man, Charlie, don’t you ever forget.” She petted his hair, eyes gushing. “And you’re so much like him. Please don’t change. But you have to promise me that if you ever have any problems, to talk to your wife, don’t ever let her pull away without you finding out why. Dad thought he knew why because…” her face crumpled again. “I lied to him. I couldn’t bring myself to tell him the truth, I was angry and ashamed and too proud. And now…he’s had to…”

  She suddenly stumbled to her feet and looked back the way they’d come. She shot back down the hall toward the observatory and he raced after her.

  “Mom!”

  “I have to see him! I have to see him, he needs me!” she yelled. “It’s not his fault, oh my God, I can’t abandon him. Ben! I’m sorry, I’m coming! I’m coming,” she gasped, racing faster now.

  Charlie caught up with her just as they got to the window. She immediately covered her mouth while Charlie locked his gaze on the person in the hospital bed. Shock held him perfectly still, not even breathing as he stared. He lay nearly flat with white supports around his head, maybe to keep it perfectly still. The large, six-inch needles with wires attached to their tips filled his body like a pin cushion.

  “What are all those things?” Cheryl whispered.

  “That has to be the acupuncture treatment Dr. Wong told us about. For the atrophy.”

  His mom suddenly clutched his arm tightly, moving closer to him. “Oh God,” she whispered, hand still over her mouth. “I wonder if that hurts?”

  “I don’t think so. He said it was just enough electricity to cause the muscles to contract. It’s on a timer. That way he doesn’t have weeks of physical therapy just to learn to walk again. I sure thank God Dr. Wong is so amazing.”

  “He really is,” his mom murmured, staring. “He looks…so peaceful. Oh God, Ben,” she whispered, putting her hand on the glass. “We love you.”

  Charlie couldn’t see the man in the bed through his tears now. His mom wrapped her arms around him, reminding him he was far from the man he was striving to be. He cried for the first time since…he could remember. Relief swept through him that his dad was alive, even like this. Grief came next, that he had to go through this, that they had to. Then joy that he had the option to, and that God had given him what he decided he shouldn’t ask for. All of it opened the flood gates.

  “We’re going to be fine, Charlie. I can feel it. We’ll be okay.”

  Time To Wake Ben

  Cheryl entered Dr. Wong’s office with Charlie and made her way to the chairs before his desk. “Good morning, Cheryl, Charlie.”

  “Morning, Dr. Wong,” she said, smiling and sitting with Charlie.

  “Are you excited?” he asked with a smile.

  Cheryl nodded. “Excited, scared.”

  “Of course, of course,” he hurried, clasping his eager hands on the desk. “So, I wanted to talk to you both about what we’re going to be doing tomorrow.”

  Cheryl nodded.

  “We have it scheduled to administer his wake-up dose at 9:00 AM. What I need to prepare you for is the many things that could happen when we do. As I said before, because we had to perform the surgery while he was undergoing a stroke, we’re not sure what the results of that will be. In addition to that, we’re also facing every other risk that existed outside of that.”

  Cheryl straightened a little. “Can you…remind me of those?”

  “Well, with all his vitals great, the main risk at the forefront are the psychological ones, which is why we will have Dr. Lanthrop there to ease him into his new reality. The worst-case scenario is he will have no memory at all. While having no memory would lessen the psychological risks involved with getting a new head, we would hope that isn’t the case. The other risk is the memory transfer could have only partially worked, which means we aren’t sure which ones he’ll have and to what capacity he will have them. A third scenario would be he remembers everything—which is what we’re hoping for.

  “But one of the things Dr. Cobbins warns about is him not having his short-term memory, which means he might not remember coming here, or even having the surgery.”

  “Oh dear,” Cheryl whispered.

  “Dr. Lanthrop will be there to help carefully navigate his awakening. Depending on Ben’s responses, he will choose the safest method to inform him of the nature of his operation.”

  “Okay,” Cheryl whispered, feeling sick about all of it.

  “Dr. Lanthrop said he’d like both of you near for when he needs to introduce you.”

  “When would that be?”

  “He’s not sure. It depends on Ben and how he takes all of it.”

  “What’s…the worst thing that can happen?” Charlie asked.

  Dr. Wong looked right at him. “He could have a psychological break down. But it’s not something he can’t recover from; it would just take time. But…we already knew this was part of the risk, right?” he reminded them.

  They nodded and Cheryl grabbed Charlie’s hand, not caring if he wanted her to. He held it back tightly, like he was glad she had.

  “We’re ready,” Charlie said, glancing at her.

  She nodded at Dr. Wong. “I’ve…I’ve been practicing. Dr. Lanthrop suggested I look at his new head as often as I can and tell myself it was Ben. So…I printed out his picture and have been doing that since I got up the nerve to finally go see him.” She lo
wered her teary gaze. “He made me realize that my ability to accept his new head will have a direct impact on how Ben accepts it. So…I’m ready.”

  “That is so very good!” he announced. “And with the risk talk out of the way, this is a very exciting time. I’m sure you are both anxious to have this part behind you.”

  More nods and needing to vomit.

  “Well, I think that’s it. If I have anything else, I’ll message you. Oh,” he remembered. “I re-sent you the post operation schedule for all of you. Ben’s, yours Charlies. Dr. Lanthrop has family time scheduled as well as marriage counseling. If you have any questions, please call or message. Oh, and Yan asked me to tell you to call her immediately.”

  With that, he stood with his smile and Cheryl did too. “Thank you Lo,” she said, going around his desk and giving him a hug.

  “Oh, okay,” he said awkwardly, laughing and patting her.

  “I’m just so thankful to you and your wife. We’re ready for this.”

  ****

  Ben opened his eyes, blinking until a face came into focus. He stared for a few seconds, feeling like it was familiar.

  “Morning, Ben,” the man said. “I’m Dr. Lanthrop. Do you remember me?”

  M…maybe. Ben realized he’d not said it out loud but forming the word with his mouth wasn’t easy at all. “M…mmm…maybe.”

  “Very good!” he rejoiced lightly. “You have undergone a major operation and it was a huge success. You’re waking up from that now. Do you remember anything?”

  He thought about it, closing his eyes as images flashed in his mind. “Cheryl…Charlie.” His voice broke.

  “Cheryl and Charlie? Can you tell me about them?”

  He looked at him. “My wife and son. I have a wife and son name Cheryl and Charlie. Where are they?”

  “They’re here, they’ll be in to see you shortly. Do you remember that you were diagnosed with Gorham’s disease?”

  He thought about it, closing his eyes to help remember. He could think easier that way. More images cycled through. Their home. His office. Their kitchen. Watching TV with his family. A church. “I…I’m not remembering that.” He regarded the man. “What is that?”

  He listened as he explained the disease and how it was terminal, and Dr. Wong came along with a miracle procedure that saved his life. “Dr. Wong.” Did he know that name? “How are my wife and son?”

  “They’re fantastic and happy that you’re awake. Do you remember where you and Cheryl married?”

  Ben did. “At our church. In Kansas.”

  “It’s important for me to learn how much of your memory was affected by the surgery. However, only if you’re able, I’d like you tell me as much as you remember about you and Cheryl and Charlie.”

  “I…I can.” Ben thought about his request.

  “As far back as you can remember,” the doctor said.

  “I… met Cheryl in high school. I fell in love with her the second I saw her even though they say that never happens. It did.” Ben went on to rehash their early relationship, all the way till the birth of their son. He added in the places they lived, the jobs they had and any high or low points.

  “Sounds like you have a wonderful family and you are all close. I’ve met both Charlie and your wife and they love you more than anything.”

  Ben didn’t know how to answer that, so he just nodded. “When will they be here?” he asked, ready to see them.

  “If you’re ready, I can call them in now.”

  “I am,” he said.

  “I’ll go get them.”

  He watched the doctor leave, then watched the door, aware of his pulse as he waited. It took a few minutes for them to come in, and when they did, he stared. That was them.

  Cheryl hurried forward and opened her arms, wrapping them around his shoulders. “Ben,” she whispered, hugging him tight then pulling back. His son did the same and Ben’s arms went up and patted him. Something was wrong. “I…Why can’t…” He looked at the doctor, not sure how to say it. “I don’t…remember.”

  “What don’t you remember, Ben?”

  He looked at Cheryl and Charlie, trying to understand what he wasn’t remembering. “Feeling,” he said.

  “You can’t remember feeling them?”

  He looked at the man. “No, I…I can’t feel…how I know them.”

  “I see,” the doctor said with a smile and nod before looking at his watch. “Okay,” he announced. “It’s Dr. Cobbins turn to speak to you. He’s our memory specialist and will help you navigate the remembering aspects of your recovery.”

  Memory aspects? He looked at Cheryl and she quickly put her smile on, as another man entered the room.

  “Good morning, Ben,” he announced, his smile beaming. “Mrs. Rabinowski,” he greeted, shaking her hand. “This must be Charlie,” he said, turning to do the same to his son. “Well, I know you are ready to get out of this gloomy room and back to living life now that the surgery is behind you. I’ll be running a couple of tests to assess your memory.”

  “Why, what’s…what does my memory have to do with anything?”

  “Well, before your operation, you suffered a stroke. We aren’t sure if it may have caused any damage and want to test for that.”

  Ben considered that, not having anything to say. Cheryl reached over and squeezed his arm and again, it brought a strange sensation through him. “I don’t… feel things.”

  The doctor perked up, putting his hands behind his back. “Okay, like what?”

  He glanced at his wife and son. “I can’t…feel what I remember.”

  “Can you explain?”

  He lowered his head. “I remember them. Everything about them. But…when my wife touched me, it was like the first time I’ve ever felt it. Same with my son. I don’t know how to explain it.”

  “Ah,” he said. “Your sensory memory may have become temporarily detached through the trauma of the operation. That’s not unusual. Do you remember where you are?”

  He didn’t. “No.”

  “So, it’s not unusual to lose short-term memory in these types of procedures.”

  “What…what kind of procedure?”

  What Operation?

  Cheryl’s stomach was in a million knots watching Ben not remember he’d had the operation. And his voice. It was so different! Dr. Lanthrop had instructed them to make sure he didn’t sense they saw him as different. She thanked God that she’d practiced looking at that face long enough for it not to be hard to do. And seeing the lost look on his face made it even easier to see Ben. Ben waking up, lost and needing her.

  Charlie stepped in closer and Cheryl grabbed his hand.

  “It was a historic operation, the first one of its kind,” the doctor informed.

  God, please let him remember. “I was the one who found Dr. Wong,” Cheryl tried to help. “We were out of options, and I searched online and found him. He’s an amazing brain specialist, very popular in his field. The disease you had would’ve eaten through your brain.”

  He glanced at her then back at the doctor, his expression perturbed. “What…did I have a brain transplant or something?”

  Oh my God. If he thought that was outrageous…

  “Actually, a brain transplant wouldn’t have saved you. The disease was eating more than flesh, it was eating bone as well.” The doctor paused briefly before saying, “Ben…there was only one way to save your life. And that was with a head transplant.”

  Ben let out a light laugh, looking at Cheryl then the doctor. “Head transplant,” he mumbled, like there was no such thing.

  “Dad,” Charlie said. “We voted on it before, at home. It was that, or you died. We all decided we’d rather you alive, we didn’t care what head you had, just so you were alive and with us.”

  He continued glancing at all of them as if waiting for them to say it was all a joke. “I got a… head transplant,” he repeated.

  “Are you ready to see?” Cheryl asked.

  “See what?�
�� he wondered, looking at her, making her swallow her dread.

  “Are you ready to see your new head?” Charlie helped, even had a hopeful tone in his voice. But Ben wasn’t hearing anything, he was mumbling and looking like somebody ready to wake from the nightmare, glancing left then right.

  “Well…I’ll go ahead and get Dr. Lanthrop,” the doctor quipped happily, leaving out.

  “What’s he getting him for?” Ben wondered, throwing the covers off his legs, more agitated now. “A head transplant.” He eyed her and she saw the outer edges of a psychological break in his gaze. “You’re not joking, you’re… you’re serious.”

  She hurried to him, wanting to show him it was okay and that she accepted him. He pulled away from her hand before she could touch his face and pain cut through her chest as the door opened behind her. Dr. Lanthrop and Dr. Wong, thank God. But the relief was quickly getting pushed out by Ben’s growing obstinance.

  “I’d like to get out of bed, when can I do that?” Ben asked. “I feel good enough.”

  “That is certainly coming,” Dr. Wong said, happily. “And that was another success with your operation, by the way. The employment of electro-acupuncture so that you weren’t tied up with physical therapy for weeks after. Judging from my program’s readings, your muscles have only lost three percent of mass, and that my friend is impressive. Do you remember me?”

  Ben shook his head, then said, “You might…seem familiar.”

  Dr. Wong reached out to shake his hand then. “I’m the doctor that performed your surgery.” Ben regarded the friendly invite and shook it. “I want to personally thank you again for doing this operation for your family and the world, Ben. You may not remember, but you’re the first person to ever undergo this historic procedure, and because of that, because of its success, the ground has been broken for the future of neurological robotics. This is huge. You’re a miracle of modern medicine. How does that feel?”

  Cheryl realized what the doctors had been doing just then. Telling him things that would help him see this in the right light. “Wow,” Ben mumbled, chuckling dryly. “You act like I’m…I’m some kind of hero or something.” He looked at Cheryl and she brightened her smile.