The Complete Darkest Sunrise Series

by Martinez, Aly

  When she didn’t reply, I hazarded a glance up. The moment her eyes met mine, my back shot straight and my heart lurched into my throat.

  Her lips formed a hard slash, and her eyes were a thunderous storm. “You need to leave,” she said in a low, malevolent whisper.

  “Excuse me?”

  She prowled around the bar, her rabid stare locked on me. “Get your clothes, leave, and don’t look back. You are not welcome here. Do you understand me? Say you understand me, Rita.” She said my name like a curse.

  I didn’t reply because I didn’t understand her at all. I didn’t know what the utter fuck was happening.

  Less than a second later, Tanner gave me my answer as he emerged from the bedroom.

  “Hey, Mama. What are you doing here?”

  * * *

  My mom looked like she was about to snap Rita in half. Usually, I was the only one able to incite that kind of rage from the cool and calm Lynn Reese.

  “Is…everything okay?” I asked, tossing my arm around Rita’s shoulders, knowing good and damn well nothing was okay.

  It could be said that I hadn’t had the opportunity to tell my mom about Rita yet.

  It could also be said that I had been flat-out lying, sending my mom to spas and on shopping excursions to keep her away from my house to avoid this scene right here.

  She and my attorney had been quite vocal about me not dating until we got the Shana thing settled. And, at first, I’d agreed.

  But then Rita had happened.

  “So this is why you’ve been hiding from me?” she asked without tearing her murderous gaze off Rita.

  “Maybe I should go,” Rita said, turning on the stool and attempting her escape.

  I caught her arm. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. No one’s going anywhere. Mom, this is Rita. Rita, this is my mom, Lynn.”

  My mom laughed without humor. “Little late on that now, aren’t you, son?”

  “I’m thirty-two. I’m allowed to have a girlfriend without bringing her home to meet the parents first.”

  “She’s married, Tanner. She can’t be your girlfriend.”

  “Oh, wow, this isn’t awkward,” Rita breathed, rising to her feet. “What if I just go take a shower and give you two a minute?”

  Judging by my mom’s face, Rita could have taken a month’s worth of showers and it wouldn’t have been long enough.

  I placed a kiss on the top of her head. “Yeah, babe. Sounds good. Put on your sneakers when you’re done. I want to show you something out back.”

  She didn’t say another word before trotting away, a full cup of coffee sloshing in her hand.

  Mom waited until the bedroom door closed before laying into me. “What the hell are you thinking?”

  “First of all, you need to chill out. There’s no reason for you to treat her like that.”

  Cradling her heart, she shuffled around me and then slowly sank to the stool. “Dear God, is it your life’s mission to give me a heart attack?”

  “I think you’re being a tad dramatic.”

  “And I think you’re acting like a damn fool. Did you not hear anything Doug said to you when he told you not to start any new relationships? And now you’re dating a married woman, who is absolutely using you to fund her divorce and quite possibly her life after her divorce too. Please tell me I did not raise you to be this stupid.”

  I walked to the coffee maker. “She’s not using me for anything. Rita’s…” I paused, a smile curling my lips as I searched for the right word to describe her. “Different.”

  “Shana was different too.”

  My smile fell, and my gut soured. “Don’t do that. Don’t even imply that Rita is anything like that witch. Night and day, Mom. Night and fucking day.”

  “Then why have you been sneaking around like you’re in high school again?”

  “Because of this,” I shot back. “Listen to you. You have one conversation with her and you’re all up in her face, telling her to leave. I knew this would happen, so I avoided it until I was in a better place and had answers for the seven million questions you’re about to ask. I know we’re tight and all, but sometimes I need you to mind your own business.”

  I felt like a dick when she winced.

  “That is not fair,” she hissed. “I have never meddled in your life. It would be pointless because you’re too damn stubborn to listen to me anyway.” She put her forearm to the bar and slanted toward me. “But I’m your mother, Tanner. I’m allowed to worry. If that woman had walked out and said you’d taken her out for shrimp and grits and then brought her back here for a night of marathon sex, I’d have offered to cook her breakfast. But she didn’t say that. She told me that you two had been dating for weeks. She told me that she was in the middle of a Jerry Springer–style divorce and you were footing the bill. And she told me that, by next week, she’d be unemployed, broke, and homeless. I’m sorry, but after Shana ran you through the mud, I’m not real keen on minding my own business anymore. I am your mother first and your friend last. So, as your mother, I am telling you that woman is no good for you.”

  My spoon clinked the inside of the mug as I stirred in the half-and-half. “And I’m telling you you’re wrong.” I propped a hip against the counter and tipped my coffee for a sip. “You remember that fling Porter volunteered us to cater? I met her there. Her douchebag of an ex had his hands on her. I told him to stop and then Rita jumped into my arms like I’d just come back from war.” I chuckled. “Okay, wait, that’s not helping my case.”

  “No, it’s not,” she snapped.

  “Okay, how about this? When I’m with Rita, there’s not a smooth bone in my body. I ramble with no filter, all the words just come tumbling out because I’m too drunk on her to form coherent sentences.”

  “That’s nice, but—”

  “I stand straighter when she’s around too. Because, for the first time, I actually care what someone thinks about me. And you know what the best part is? She tells me no. A lot. For weeks, I’ve been chasing that woman like the sun chases the horizon and she has never once made it easy on me.”

  “Easy is good, Tanner.”

  “No, easy is boring, Mom. And I know what you’re going to say. It’s only been a few weeks, but I promise you, a woman like Rita will never stop making me work for it. And I want that. So fucking bad.” I took another sip of coffee because I was getting louder and I needed to buy myself a second to collect my thoughts. When I was sure I wasn’t about to burst into song like a fucking cartoon prince, I continued, “Oh, and get this: She laughs at me too. And not because I’m funny. She laughs at me.”

  She curled her lip. “I’m not sure that’s a good quality, son.”

  “It is. Because she gives me shit and argues with me when every other woman just gives me a free pass.” I dropped my voice to a whisper. “She sleeps with her hand on my chest, Mom. My chest. Please tell me you see the meaning in that.”

  She looked away. “Jesus, when did you turn into your brother?”

  I scoffed. “Now is not the time for insults.”

  She laughed and gave me back her blue eyes, which matched my own. “So, if this Rita woman hangs the moon, why haven’t you slept with her yet?”

  I choked on a breath of air. “Shit. How long were you two talking out here?”

  “Answer me.”

  I shrugged. “We’re taking it slow.”

  “That’s bullcrap and you know it. You haven’t taken anything slow with a woman since you were fourteen and learned you had dimples.”

  “I just told you how much I like her. Why is it so hard to believe that I’d want to go slow so we don’t screw this up?”

  “Uh…because you’re falling in love with a woman before her divorce is final. That’s not slow, Tanner. That’s warp speed ahead. But you’re not sleeping with her and I want to know why.”

  “You are entirely too concerned with your son’s sex life. Please speak with your therapist about this.”

  She rolled her eyes. “
I’m still working through you and your brother’s teen years in therapy, but I’ll be sure to add this to the list.”

  I took the two steps it required to cross my kitchen and leaned forward on my forearms, mirroring her position and bringing our faces only inches apart. Patting her hand, I smiled and said, “She makes me happy and that’s all you need to know. I’ll worry about the rest of it, okay?”

  A shadow passed over her face. “Have you told her about Shana?”

  I smirked because I was about to surprise the shit out of her. “Yep.”

  Her brows knit together before she verbally punched me in the gut. “Including the baby?”

  I sucked in a sharp breath, every molecule burning as they traveled to my lungs. I wanted to lie, but she would have known before the first syllable.

  “I knew it!” she exclaimed in a whispered yell.

  I shoved off the counter, my neck suddenly itching as the fire in my throat engulfed my entire body. “There’s nothing to tell.”

  “I think when she finds out the woman you broke up with two months ago is currently four months pregnant, she’s going to feel a little differently.”

  I raked a hand through the top of my hair to keep from tearing out of my own skin. “It doesn’t matter. It’s not my baby.”

  “We have been through this, Tanner. You and Shana were together for six months and you told me yourself you stopped using condoms three months in. Even if she was out sleeping around, as long as she was sleeping with you too, there’s always a chance.”

  I stared at the bedroom door, knowing that Rita was somewhere on the other side, guilt clawing up the back of my throat. “Why the hell do you keep bringing this up? I have told you a dozen times that it isn’t my baby. Let it fucking go.”

  She stood up fast, stabbing her finger into the countertop. “No. Until that baby is born and a DNA test rules you out as the father, you have to be prepared that it might be yours.”

  “It’s not mine!” I seethed, careful to keep my voice low. Like a caged tiger, I paced the length of that short kitchen so many times that I was dizzying myself with all the turns. But I never took my eyes off that bedroom door. My blood pressure rose with every step, and beads of sweat prickled my forehead. We shouldn’t have been having this conversation. It was a non-issue.

  But I knew that it wasn’t going to be that to Rita. Not after what Greg had done to her.

  What the hell was I supposed to do though? I met her the day Tammy told her she was pregnant. What? That same night, on our first date, I was supposed to tell her, “Oh, by the way, my ex is pregnant and she’s claiming it’s mine and refusing a DNA test until after it’s born. But I promise you it’s not mine. Though I can’t really prove this. Sorry, I know you just met me and all, but I’m going to need you to take my word on this.”

  No. Fuck that.

  I’d wanted Rita from the moment I’d seen her. No fucking way I was drawing that kind of parallel between myself and douchebag Greg.

  But that was what she was going to think.

  I knew it. And creeping on three weeks later, I still couldn’t bring myself to man the fuck up and tell her the truth.

  But dammit, the truth wasn’t the truth.

  My mom’s face was soft as she stepped in front of me, forcing me to stop. “That’s why you’re not sleeping with her?”

  I craned my head back to stare up at the ceiling. “I don’t want her to think I’m anything like him. It’s already too similar. But if I sleep with her while lying to her at the same time… I don’t know, okay? I just don’t know.”

  She gave my arm a motherly squeeze. “Maybe you should talk to her, then. If she can’t handle it, then she’s not the right woman for you.”

  My chest felt like it was caving in as I confessed, “She’s the right woman, Mom. I feel it in my bones every time she looks at me. But the timing? It’s like fate’s cruel joke. She’s got so much to deal with over the next few months. Hell, I do too. But I don’t want to let her go. If I have to tell her about this bullshit with Shana, she’s not going to come back, either. And I wouldn’t blame her. Because, right now, I’m doing to her what every other woman does to me. I’m showing her all the pretty stuff in hopes that it will be enough to make her accept the ugly when the time comes.”

  “Oh, sweetheart,” she whispered. “You really like this one, don’t you?”

  “I do. I really fucking do.”

  She grabbed both of my shoulders and peered up at me. “Okay, then you just have to make her understand. You aren’t like that ex of hers. You’re a good man, Tanner. The fact that you’re standing here, panicking about it, proves it. It’s not like you were out cheating on her. Whatever did or didn’t happen with Shana was before you two met. And you and this Rita woman have only been together a few weeks. Who says you need to share all your dirty laundry that soon anyway?”

  My shoulders sagged, the weight on my chest becoming heavier. “I did. I pretty much told her exactly that.”

  She waved me off. “Look, if you feel so strongly about this woman, then you need to find the time to tell her. And soon. The deeper you two get, the more she’s going to feel betrayed. It’s not going to be easy, honey. But you have to do it. Like, today.”

  I nodded. She was right. I couldn’t stand the constant dread pooling in my gut much longer. It’d been smothering me for too long.

  “I think you’d really love her. She’s a feisty one.” I smiled.

  She pulled me in for a hug. “As long as you love her, Tanner, that’s all I need.”

  I leaned away. “Whoa, easy there. I didn’t say I love her yet.”

  My mom smirked. “Yeah, you did. Maybe not those exact words. But you said it all the same.”

  I grinned. “She’s amazing.”

  “So you keep saying.”

  “You want to meet her?”

  “I already met her and I told her to get out and never come back.”

  “Okay, so you want to meet her when you aren’t the mom version of The Incredible Hulk?”

  She sighed. “Since you aren’t going to give up without me saying yes. Yes. I’d love to meet her. I’ll make you two cream-cheese-stuffed French toast as my apology while I eat my crow.”

  “Mmm!” I groaned. “You’re going to have to raid the fridge downstairs. My grocery lady hasn’t been by recently.” I winked.

  She shot me a scalding glare. “You spent an exorbitant amount of money to send your grocery lady to spas around the city because you were too afraid to tell her you had a girlfriend. You could have saved yourself a fortune if you’d fired her instead.”

  I barked a laugh, and she shook her head, trying to hide her own smile.

  She flicked her chin to the bedroom door. “Go on. Tell her it’s safe to come out.”

  I nodded but didn’t move. For the briefest second, my mind drifted back to what Rita had said about her parents. I couldn’t imagine who I’d be if I’d grown up without my mom and dad the way she had. They had given Porter and me everything they could, including cream-cheese-stuffed French toast while eating crow.

  “Thanks, Mom.”

  She moved around me, heading toward the stove. “Oh, don’t thank me yet. I’m about to embarrass the hell out of you.”

  She would. No doubt about it.

  But Rita would laugh. At me, of course.

  And I would love every single second of it.

  * * *

  My skin was a suit of wrinkles when Tanner finally knocked on the bathroom door and told me it was safe to come out. I’d have already snuck out the window if his bathroom hadn’t been on the second floor. I didn’t know that anything could be more embarrassing than getting off while dry-humping my hot celebrity quasi-boyfriend. Though spilling all the Jerry Springer details of my divorce in front of his mom was pretty damn close.

  But no matter how long I stood under the two heads of Tanner’s shower, scalding water raining down over me, I couldn’t wash it away.

  He was
lounging on the bed like a Greek god, waiting on me when I emerged from the bathroom dressed in a pair of little blue workout shorts, a white fitted tank, and the sneakers he’d told me to put on. I couldn’t lie—the shoes were multipurpose. First, for whatever he wanted to show me in the backyard. Secondly, to run from his mom if I needed to make a break for it. Jeesh, Tanner had said I was scary. His mom was terrifying.

  Thus, when he told me she was cooking us breakfast and wanted to “re-meet me,” I once again stared longingly at the bedroom window, wondering how badly it would hurt if I jumped.

  Begrudgingly, I agreed to breakfast, and surprisingly enough, when we walked out of the bedroom arm in arm, his mom was a different person. She had a wide smile and a gentle, teasing demeanor she’d clearly passed to her son. She apologized for snapping at me and then sipped coffee while making us the most unbelievable cream-cheese-stuffed French toast. After tasting her food, I was seriously going to have to step up my game from tuna noodle casserole.

  We laughed a lot over breakfast. His mom told me stories from Tanner’s youth. Most of them were embarrassing. All of them were hilarious. And Tanner rolled with it, eating with one hand and holding mine with his other. I found out that Tanner paid his mom to clean his house, do his laundry, and shop for his groceries. It was their compromise when he’d insisted that his parents retire early and allow him to take over all of their bills. Well, Tanner said that it was their compromise. Lynn said that her son was helpless in every room of the house outside of the kitchen, so whether he paid her or not, she was still going to be there a few times a week to make sure he didn’t drown in dirty laundry. She also said that helping out made her feel like she wasn’t freeloading on her son.

  Tanner’s father didn’t share this worry. In a deep exaggerated voice, Tanner made us laugh by impersonating his father. “I don’t give a damn if I am freeloading on my son. That kid freeloaded on me for eighteen years. I’d have a mansion in Maui by now if it weren’t for those boys wasting all my money on food and shelter.”