Hidden Wishes Omnibus

by Tao Wong

  “I’d continue to play these games. Maybe get a library card. Visit a few cities and some old friends. Bud and Merl are always good fun. It’s been ages since I’ve been to Peng Lai,” mused Lily as she continued to play.

  “And I’m supposed to believe that?” Alexa said, her voice filled with scorn.

  “Of course not. I was more telling Henry here. Give him a few ideas for trips when he levels up a bit. It’d do him good to meet some of my friends,” Lily replied and looked at Alexa, smiling slightly. “Some of your people could do with meeting them too. Perhaps it’d convince you that the world isn’t ending anytime soon, no matter what you think.”

  “That’s because we keep you supernaturals in check!” Alexa snapped, to which Lily snorted and looked up, fixing Alexa with that thousand-year-old stare she occasionally got. I watched as Alexa paled, the weight of the look enough to quiet the initiate.

  “Please. You do good work, but the real heavy lifting is done well above your paygrade,” Lily said, shaking her head. “Not that anyone actually does much anymore. Mostly, it’s just another cold war.”

  “I thought there were, you know, gods that just wanted destruction. Ragnarök, the apocalypse, ‘eating the sun’ kind of things,” I said.

  “Oh, yeah, there are those idiots, but they’re locked down pretty tight. Any time they poke their heads out, the others give them a good smacking,” Lily replied. “It’s amazing what globalization has done for the general stability of the world. Once everyone got over the fact they weren’t the only ones, dealing with the idiots became so much easier.”

  “That’s rubbish. Look at World War I!” Alexa refuted Lily.

  “Yes. Let’s look at World War I,” Lily said, tapping at her computer for a few seconds before focusing on us. “A giant world war with guns, tanks, and other newly revealed forms of destruction. And yet, no islands sank, no dark gods rose or civilizations sent back to the dark ages.”

  “A few million people died!” Alexa said.

  “People die. Civilizations die. You get as old as most of the people you’re worried about are, you accept that fact. We’re not here to stop you from doing stupid things, just destroying the world,” Lily said, shaking her head. “Most of us actually like this world and the way it is. Do you have any idea how boring an ice age is?”

  Alexa opened and closed her mouth before she glared at Lily, falling silent. I watched the pair for a moment more before I cleared my throat, drawing attention back to me. “Anyway. Lily isn’t a threat right now. She’s stuck watching over me because of my wish, and I don’t intend to destroy the world.”

  “Even if I believed that, I can’t let you keep it. There’s nothing to stop someone else from taking the ring,” Alexa said.

  “Except the Mage Council already tried.” I paused, making a quick decision. “Your oracle, they sent you to fight me and not someone more senior, right? Did you ever wonder why?”

  “Well… yes.” Alexa frowned.

  “Right, well, look…” I leaned forward and gave her the gist of the matter. I noticed Lily twitch, but I ignored it, deciding to gamble. I told her all about it, how combat with me was restricted by my wish, how I would eventually get better, but till then, the truly dangerous could not touch me.

  “You’re saying I was chosen because I’m as good as a four-month-old wizard?” Alexa asked when I finally wound down.

  “Well, ummm…” I paused and looked over at Lily who had returned to her games. “Not exactly me—”

  “No. It was your game system. Which is controlled by the jinn,” Alexa said and pursed her lips. “And according to you, the Mage Council has already tried and failed to take the ring.”

  “Yes.”

  “You know, you’re not exactly making your case here,” Alexa replied. “Sooner or later, someone is going to manage to take it from you. Over your dead body if they have to.”

  “Says the woman who stabbed me,” I muttered, and Alexa flushed.

  “I said sorry already.”

  I shook my head again, the initiate a contradiction of emotions and reasoning I had yet to understand. She wanted the ring but felt bad about almost killing me. Yet, if I had to guess, without her parole, she might try again. Then again, if I thought about the entire religion, I could see how the contradictions inherent in her position could be difficult.

  “What do you expect me to do?” I growled, throwing my hands up in the air. “I can’t stop people from coming after me. We tried to keep this quiet, but it seems like not talking about it doesn’t help. I’m doing the best I can.”

  “It’s not enough,” Alexa said, her voice growing soft. “You have your wish, and you’ll be a full mage. But so long as you have the ring, you’ll be a target for forces you cannot control. Give me the ring and let us handle the problem.”

  “And what would you do with it?” I frowned, staring at Alexa and tapping the ring with my thumb. “Are you going to lock it away? Or use it?”

  “I—” Alexa paused, then spoke frankly to me. “I don’t know. That is a decision that will be made by others more senior than me.”

  “Right. And all of them are going to be wise and smart and not try to make a wish,” I said. “You said it. The ring, Lily, she’s too powerful for others to use.”

  “You did.”

  “And I actually talked to her before I made my wish,” I said. “And even then, look at the shit I’m in. Wishes have unintended consequences. Always.”

  “I’d also point out that so long as Henry lives, my strength is seriously curtailed,” Lily said, pointing to me. “His first wish is quite strong and requires a significant amount of my strength to function. Even if he gave you the ring, it would be significantly less powerful. And it wouldn’t help him; the Mage Council would not believe he gave up the ring voluntarily. Nor would any others that might come for it. And even once they were convinced, many of those that would come would kill him anyway to reduce future competition.”

  “Exactly.” I nodded firmly and then paused, running the last sentence through my mind and paling slightly. “Anyway, the ring with me means we won’t get stomped immediately. No guarantee with you guys.”

  “We are Knights Templar. We are not, not, not a nerd living in a basement bachelor suite with his gaming books and tame jinn!” Alexa snapped, standing up and glaring at me. “We have God and the Church on our side and can protect that ring.”

  “Except you didn’t, did you?” I asked, shaking my head. “I found the ring in the belongings of an ex-Mage Council member, so you guys must have failed before.”

  “It was hidden from us. That the ring resurfaced, after so many years… we cannot, I cannot, let you have it, Henry. Once my parole is up…” Alexa shook her head. “I must keep it safe. Even if I have to kill you. I will not hesitate next time.”

  “And there we have it,” I said, flopping down on the bed. “There it always ends up. All the preaching about love thy neighbor, turn the other cheek, be peaceful and pacifist. That always gets thrown away for the damn god of practicality.”

  “And you don’t subscribe to it,” Alexa said, pointing at Lily.

  “Well…” I laughed, shaking my head. “I don’t go about telling everyone else how to live. Also, I made a wish to gain magic powers. Whimsical and foolish seems to be more my wheelhouse. And yes, I’m a little bit of a dreamer because I’m not giving this ring up.”

  Alexa opened her mouth, but I refused to look at her as I continued to stare at the ceiling. For all my whining and complaining, she was right. The Mage Council, the Knights Templar, and god knows who else were coming. And so far, they’d played nice. I might have been protected, but everyone else around me wasn’t. Even I could see the damn hole in our defenses. There was nothing I could do to stop them, so…

  If I couldn’t beat them, I’d change the rules.

  ***

  “Lily.” I squatted next to her and waited for her to look at me. I ges
tured to her games, and she raised an eyebrow, tapping to put them on pause or at least let her guildmates know she was gone. Seated on our only other chair, Alexa looked up with interest from the book she was reading. I ignored her, and she made no move to come closer, though she was obviously listening as I continued. “I have an idea.”

  “And I’m not going to like it,” Lily said.

  “No. But I think, well, this might work. I’m assuming I can’t wish you free, right?” I nodded to the ring, and Lily’s confirming nod let me dismiss that option. Not that it was very high on the list. For all that I liked the jinn, she was also someone I’d known only four months, and I would admit I was a bit of an optimist when it came to people. Fooling me would not have been hard. “Figured. Right, then we do the next best thing. We make it so the ring isn’t available to anyone even if I die.”

  “How?” Lily asked as she raised an eyebrow.

  “Well, I was thinking the sun?”

  “No,” Lily said, shaking her head. “Anything above the earth would spark a war among the gods. The agreements that bind them from interfering would be void.”

  “And under the ocean is probably a bad idea since, well, I’m sure there’s Atlantis and merfolk and the like, right?” I said.

  “No Atlantis,” Lily said, shaking her head. “Seriously, it was just a story, but you humans…”

  “Huh.” I paused, assimilating that fact before moving on. It wasn’t as if I could do anything about it. “So, we’ll need to find a place which can’t be accessed by mortals easily, preferably hidden, and that the gods won’t fight over. Sound about right?”

  “It’ll also have to be after you’re dead,” Lily said. “So long as your initial wish is active, the link between myself and the ring can be easily traced.”

  “Right.”

  “You are going to make the ring disappear?” Alexa said, finally breaking in. “Think of the good it could do.”

  “Oh, please,” I said, shaking my head. “Haven’t you been listening? The ring, Lily, isn’t a solution. She’s just another damn problem. No offense.”

  “A little taken,” Lily said, with a smile.

  “But to make it disappear…” Alexa said, shaking her head. “Won’t you trap the jinn too? Put your ‘friend’ in whichever location you decide on?”

  “Yes.” I closed my eyes and then reopened them, and Lily tilted her head to the side, her face carefully blank as she regarded me. “I think it’s time for you to go.”

  “What?” Alexa said, startled.

  “It’s time for you to go. Shoo. Your parole is still active, but I don’t want you here. You don’t need to know the details of this wish,” I said, my voice firming. “In fact, it’s best if you don’t.”

  Alexa crossed her arms in front of her body. “I—”

  “Alexa, go. Either that, or I’m going to knock you out.” I raised my hand as I began to call a Light spell to hand.

  “You’d be breaking your side of the bargain,” Alexa said, eyeing the glowing light above my hand warily. After all, while most people knew what Light spells might look like, there was no guarantee it was not hiding something else.

  “So are you,” I said and then paused, looking at Alexa straight in the eyes. “Please. Just go.”

  Alexa hesitated visibly, seeing something in my eyes that finally made her nod. She quickly gathered her things and left. At the door, she hesitated for a second, searching for something more to say. But we’d said it all, again and again.

  When we were alone, I turned back to Lily, who had arranged her face into a careful, impassive mien. I smiled grimly and then tapped her on the nose, making her blink. “Well, that should work. So, here’s what I was actually thinking…”

  Lily stared at me, her eyes widening before they tightened, crinkling slightly. She leaned in as I lowered my voice to get her feedback on my second wish.

  ***

  “What did you do?” El snapped at me when I finally opened the door for her. She stalked in, pushing me aside, and looked around the apartment. It didn’t take her long, at which point she spun around and stabbed me with her finger. “Where is she?”

  “Lily?”

  “No. The other super-hot jinn who lives with you,” El growled.

  “Huh. You find her hot?” I raised an eyebrow and then yelped as El stabbed me in the chest again with her finger.

  “Stop playing around, Henry. This is important,” El said. “What did you do?”

  “I solved a problem,” I said, pushing her finger away and closing the apartment door. When I turned back to El, she had her hip cocked and arms crossed. “Lily’s busy letting the relevant people know what I did, as per my wish.”

  “And what did you do?” El asked. “Because what I’m hearing is less than encouraging.”

  “I made a wish that will guarantee no one gets the ring if I don’t die fulfilling a level-appropriate challenge after level one hundred or from natural causes,” I said.

  “Why?” El frowned, looking at me.

  “Because if I just made the ring disappear after I died, they’d have no reason not to kill me immediately. In fact, I’d be begging them to do so. This way, they have a time limit and a goal—get me powerful enough to die without the ring disappearing,” I explained.

  “That just puts a target on you and lets these groups know the ring has been found,” El said, staring at me.

  “It was going to come out anyway. I’ve been attacked twice—”

  Her hand rose, and El’s voice grew chilly as she asked, “Twice?”

  “Oh, right. You didn’t know. Well, you see…” I quickly explained about Alexa to El, who gritted her teeth through the entire explanation.

  When I was done, El smiled at me sweetly, leaned back, and kicked me in the balls. At which point, she ended up hopping on her other foot, cursing up a storm, as her foot had come in contact with the wish. When she was finally done, El was seated on my bed rubbing her shin.

  “Next time, call me!” El growled.

  “I had it under control. No one died,” I said and shrugged. “Anyway, Alexa was nice, if kind of single-minded. She wasn’t about to kill me.”

  “She stabbed you. And told you she would do whatever it took to get the ring!”

  “Well, sure. But that’s just her job,” I said, waving my hand. “Anyway, now she won’t.”

  “Did you just make a wish to get in her pants?” El said, her eyes wide.

  “No!” I replied instantly. After a moment, I continued slower. “Look, Alexa was just the tip of the spear. The next person to come along wouldn’t be as nice. I needed to make sure they wouldn’t try to kill me or, you know, threaten others to get to the ring. This way, I get people like the Mage Council and the Templars watching over me so that when those idiots do arrive, they get dealt with.”

  “Why would they—” El paused, a chain of possibilities probably running through her mind. Outside of a few groups that would want the ring gone, any power-hungry group would actually be lining up to guard me.

  “And what happens if you fail before you’re level one hundred?”

  “Well, then I’m dead, and it ain’t my problem,” I said. “But seriously, before level one hundred, I’m as safe as I can be. After that, well, they’ll likely just give me a bunch of idiotic quests in an attempt to kill me.”

  El nodded, her long hair swaying. “It sounds well thought out mostly. But if they know about this, aren’t you worried they’ll try to work out the limits of your wish? Or a way to beat Lily?”

  “It’s a risk,” I said, agreeing with her. “But it’s better than doing nothing. And so long as I can level up at a decent rate, the chances are low.”

  “And when you die?” El finally asked. “The ring becomes the property of whoever can get it.”

  “Yes,” I said, smiling wryly. “But I’ve no intention of dying anytime soon. And who knows, maybe I’ll figure out a better plan by t
hen.”

  “You better. We don’t need another damn war,” El said, shaking her finger at me.

  I could only nod. After all, I had no intention of causing one either.

  Chapter 12

  After El had left and Lily returned, life once again returned to its prior routine for a few days. The only real change was that Lily rarely used the second laptop anymore as she was forced to pay greater attention to me and our surroundings. Since we hadn’t wanted to alert everyone, we’d instead worded the wish such that she could and would check my surroundings and the buildings regularly for new interested parties. This allowed her to impart the warning before they started making trouble. At least, that was the theory.

  Of course, that left me stuck up at home for the most part till everything and everyone settled. Not that I wouldn’t need to head out and grab some quests again soon enough—if for nothing more than to pay rent and build up some reserves. I hated not having any real cushion, but between the numerous failed and unpaid quests and my unemployment before this entire thing, my emergency fund was looking pretty anemic.

  Which made the pounding on my basement door one morning rather surprising. I frowned, peeking through the peephole to see a grumpy-looking Templar initiate with a bag slung over her shoulder standing on the other side of the door. I cautiously opened the door, noting her spear was at least capped and covered. Still, I put up my Lesser Shield first too.

  “Yes?” I said.

  “Let me in. This bag is heavy,” Alexa said as she pushed against the door. It banged against my foot and stopped, bouncing back slightly. “Well, come on.”

  “The last time we spoke, you threatened to kill me,” I said.

  “Yes. And then you made your stupid wish, and now I’m to help you survive. So, let me in,” Alexa said, pushing against the door harder.

  I winced as the pressure increased against my foot, and I finally moved it away. The blonde stomped into the room, dropped her bag on the ground, and then spun to me, leveling the still-covered spear at my chest.