Determination

by S. E. Rose

  He pulls out a piece of paper and lays it on the table. The damned asshole has all the passcodes that took Walsh days to figure out. As I’m about to upload the infected data, I hear something outside the front door. Unfortunately, so does Saeed.

  “Stay here,” he orders and walks toward the front of the building.

  I turn just in time to see Jack break down the door and lunge at Saeed. The gun goes off, but the bullet lodges into a wall. Jack and Saeed are wrestling on the ground and I start to get up as I come to my senses and rush toward them. Only someone is already there, and my mouth drops to the floor.

  Vanessa is standing over the men holding the gun that has spun out of Saeed’s hand during the skirmish.

  Saeed starts to lunge at her and she steps back. “No, no, I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” she chastises him. He freezes. I can see he’s uncertain of what to do. Hell, I’m uncertain about what to do. Does Vanessa know how to use a gun? She unlocks the safety, and in that instant, I know that she knows how to use a gun.

  Her stance is perfect, and she turns her head a little to the side, aiming right at Saeed’s chest.

  “I like this plot twist,” she says slowly, her mouth curving up a bit. “You thought you had us all figured out, didn’t you?”

  Saeed freezes and his breath hitches as she continues. “You don’t remember me, do you?”

  He stills and stares at her. “Cleveland, Ohio, July second of, gosh, what year was that? Let me think, oh yeah, fifteen years ago to be exact. A young girl named Molly Burke and her friend Vanessa. You thought it’d be an easy job and you were pissed that you were sent to babysit the new recruit. But then things went very wrong, didn’t they.”

  I’m beyond confused now. Who the hell is Molly Burke and why is Saeed suddenly quivering?

  “Oh, you do remember me then?” she asks him. “You got Molly out of there, you fucker, but you didn’t get me. And what are the motherfucking odds that the man I love would happen to cross paths with you, you shit hole? Serendipity? Kismet? Those words don’t seem strong enough. But I promise you this bullet is plenty strong. I’ve been sleeping for fifteen years, waiting, hoping, and now the world has righted itself and here we are. Funny how karma works, isn’t it, Mark, or should I say Saeed? Is that what you go by now? Your given name? Seems a bit cliché if you ask me.” Jack is looking at Vanessa, but he doesn’t seem as confused as I am. I am one hundred and ten percent lost.

  As Vanessa starts to pull the trigger, Jack lunges at her.

  “No, Vanessa, don’t do it,” he says as he grabs her arm. The gun fires as Vanessa’s arm goes up and the bullet hits Saeed square in the forehead.

  He crumbles to the floor and I’m standing dripping in brain matter and blood behind him.

  Jack and Vanessa freeze and I see the gun drop from her hands.

  “Shit!” Jack yells and pulls a phone from his pocket. I start to walk toward Vanessa, but I hear sirens and helicopters and then all hell breaks loose as army, police, and SWAT descend upon us.

  Jack throws me a towel at some point to wipe my face off and I do it, but I can’t look away from Vanessa. She won’t look at me and I’m torn between being really fucking pissed off and really fucking concerned about her.

  There’s chaos around us for a while. Questions fly at me in multiple languages. The next few minutes play out in a haze of reality that feels more like a bad action film than my actual life. Jack eventually leads us to a small back bedroom and makes us sit in chairs. He looks at Vanessa and sighs.

  “Are you going to tell him, or am I?” he asks her.

  For the first time since the island, she looks over at me. Her eyes look sad and resigned. She takes a breath. “I’ll tell him. Can you give us a minute?” she asks him.

  He nods and walks out of the room, closing the door behind us.

  “Vanessa, what the—”

  “Jesse, please listen to me. Before you jump to conclusions, just hear me out, OK?” she pleads.

  I nod and clench my teeth.

  She sighs and runs a hand through her long hair. She starts to make little heart shapes on the table with her finger.

  “When I was fifteen, I had a friend named Molly.” She smiles at a memory. “Molly and I met when she moved to town when we were twelve. She was my best friend. So sweet and kind and she was just…Molly. She was a half year older than me and so she had just gotten her license. We wanted to go to Cleveland and, somehow, we talked our parents into it. We walked around and had a blast and then we met this older guy and his younger brother, and they wanted to hang out with us. They were foreign and exotic, and we thought it’d be fun to hang with them. We wanted to feel cool, so we said yes. Eventually, the one guy Mark offered to take Molly to get some ice cream while his brother, Matt, and I went to buy a CD I wanted. Matt tried to talk me into sneaking into the back of the store, but I felt something was off. I told him sure and that I just wanted to pee first. I went toward the bathroom and when he went into the back of the store, I hightailed it out of there and found a security officer at the mall. He and I went to find Molly, but there was no sign of her at the ice cream place. The police were called, and they found a lot of blood in the loading dock area of the mall. It turned out to be Molly’s. We never saw her again. They didn’t think she had survived with that much blood loss. They never found Matt or Mark.”

  She breathes again before continuing. “After that, my parents were freaked out. My dad made me learn how to shoot and I had to learn karate. It was only a few months later that I was discovered and then I always had security around me. I guess that made my parents feel better. All those years, I wondered what had happened to her. I read about the sex slave trade and I did my homework. I learned who Mark and Matt really were, but I didn’t know how to get to them. When I saw his photo, I knew. That’s why I went to the island. I thought if I could stop him, if I could find him.”

  “So, all this time, you were just with me to get to Saeed?” I ask, truly shocked.

  Her face pales. “Oh no. No, no, no. It’s not like that. When I met you…I didn’t know then. I didn’t know until your mother’s party. There was a photo in the office. Jack didn’t hide it very well.” A single tear runs down her cheek. “I meant it when I said I loved you, Jesse. I do. I didn’t bring up Molly because, well, I just didn’t know how. My family never talks about it. Molly’s family moved away shortly after that and, well, we just buried it. Because I was a minor, my name was redacted from the police reports. So, no one ever knew. I never mentioned it and I guess I never dealt with it either. I’m sure Jack figured it out somehow, maybe even before the party. He’d have access to the un-redacted police reports with my name in them.”

  I reach up and wipe away a second tear that’s running down her cheek. “Kismet huh? Serendipity?”

  She nods. “All of this…yes. Meeting you, when we clearly had crossed paths all those years ago. Then finding out Saeed is Mark and that he was after you. It all seems…surreal. Plus, I was reeling from the fact that I didn’t realize all my staff were fucking me over. I thought I was smarter than that.” She shrugs and looks a little sheepish. “Guess I’m not a world-class spy, huh?”

  “Oh, Vanessa, I wish you would have told me,” I say with a sigh. “You can trust me, you know?”

  She nods. “I know that. This was just something I didn’t share with anyone.”

  “I see,” I mumble under my breath.

  “I’m sorry, Jesse, so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I’ve been on autopilot since the party, trying to figure out when to tell you and then all this happened, and I guess it got a little out of control and I didn’t know what to do.”

  I sigh. “I suppose I kept things from you too. Although you found out anyhow,” I grumble.

  She laughs. “Yeah, I guess I did, huh?” And she nudges my shoulder. I sigh. I’m so fucking confused and I don’t know what to do. I can’t believe Vanessa kept all this from me. I seriously am questioning our entire relationship
.

  “I need some time to process this,” I say to her slowly. I can see her eyes well up and it pains me to do this. “Just give me some time, alright.”

  “OK,” she breathes. I stand, and she grabs my hand as I turn to go. “For what it’s worth, I love you, Jesse. I just didn’t want to hurt you. I realize that was probably a huge mistake and I doubt you’ll ever trust me again, but I wanted you to know that everything I’ve done since I met you has been out of love for you, for Molly, for our families.”

  I nod and pull my hand away. I can see Jack watching me as I exit the room, past the crime scene, past the cops, and straight into a car that Baxter is standing next to. “Take me home,” I tell him as he shuts the door.

  “Yes, Mr. Ryder,” he answers formally, and he gets inside and drives me to the airport. When we arrive, he hands me a clean shirt and I look down to see I’m covered in blood. I take off my shirt and toss it in a trash can near the entrance to the airport. I pull on a souvenir t-shirt he has given me. He’s called my plane and it’s waiting for me at the international airport on the main island. He leaves me to get my bags and as I sit in the open-air terminal of the Moorea airport, Jack walks up behind me.

  “You’ll need to give a statement before you can leave,” he says quietly. “I can’t take it because I was there, but I brought an officer who can.”

  I nod. And we walk over to a private area, so the guy can ask me questions. Twenty minutes later, my statement is made, and I sign a document. I’m free to go.

  “Jesse,” Jack says, grabbing my arm as I turn to catch the small plane over to my private jet.

  I turn to face him.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about her,” he says. “I figured she had her reasons for not wanting to talk about it and I wasn’t completely sure it was related to Saeed at all. That was a long time ago. It’s really, what’s the word, kismet? Yes, kismet that you found each other at this moment in time of all times. I think she was trying to right a wrong and protect you at the same time. I’ve thoroughly checked her background. She’s not a bad person, stupid, brazen even, but she’s not bad. I thought you should know.”

  I nod and walk toward the waiting plane. I’m trembling with anger, anger at Jack, anger at Vanessa, anger at Saeed.

  Baxter sits next to me but sensing my mood he is smart enough to say nothing. We land in Papeete and he leads me to a special area for private jets. We go through security and board my plane.

  I don’t sleep the entire flight home. I grab a shower at some point, washing away the blood, the smell of Vanessa, but I can’t scrub away the memories.

  I pull on sweatpants and an old college t-shirt and I sit and stare out the window as Irma periodically offers me beverages, all of which I turn down. I’m so fucked that I’m beyond drinking at this point, which is a first for me.

  When we land, Baxter explains that a series of arrests were made after we left. Jack used information from the data and from the other suspects now in custody to create a domino effect of arrests throughout the globe during the many hours I was flying home. He believes the data will help him eventually bring down an entire network of human traffickers. That makes me feel slightly better, but I’m still numb.

  I finally look at my phone as my car pulls up to my New York apartment.

  Rick: Call me!

  Rick: WTF? Call me!

  Rick: I swear to God, and I don’t even believe in him, if you don’t call me I am going to kick your motherfucking ass!

  Rick: I’m on my way over to kick your goddamn ass!

  Rick: Where the fuck are you? I swear to God! I don’t care if you fire my ass, I am going to kill you if you don’t answer soon!

  I can’t help the small smile that graces my lips. I love that guy. I really do. I have a few texts from Walsh as well.

  Walsh: Making sure you’re OK. I heard shit got serious. Call me if you want.

  Walsh: Just worried about you, man. Text me, so I know you’re OK.

  I text Walsh back saying I’m alive and we’ll talk later. As I enter the elevator, Rick is standing there, and I know I’m in big trouble. But instead of pummeling my ass, he bear-hugs me.

  “Jesus fucking Christ! I am so gonna kill you!” he yells.

  “I’m fine, Rick,” I say to him as Baxter joins us in the elevator.

  “Listen, I know shit got crazy. I got a debrief, but Cain and I are here if you need us. Seriously, anything, just fucking ask,” he says.

  “I’ve cleared your schedule for forty-eight hours. That’s all I’m giving you to regroup, but I think you’ve earned that. Oh, yeah, you’re welcome,” he says.

  “For what?” I ask him.

  “For, gosh, I don’t know. Running your damn empire while you were gone,” he says rolling his eyes.

  I roll mine back at him. “Cain was running my empire.”

  “Uh, yeah,” he says and points a finger at himself. “Who do you think keeps him in line? That’s right, the queen rules the palace, and don’t you forget it!” he says loudly as he pushes a finger against my chest. I can hear Baxter trying to contain his laughter behind me.

  I can’t help chuckling. “Noted. You done?”

  “I’m just getting started,” he says as the doors open.

  I turn and block him from entering the apartment. “That’ll be all for tonight, Rick,” I say to him as I gently nudge him back inside the elevator. “Oh, and thanks,” I say with a smirk as the doors shut to a stunned look on his face.

  Baxter laughs. “Jesus, you two are like on a whole other level.”

  “No fucking shit,” I quip as I head toward my bedroom. “I’m going to bed. Don’t wake me unless the city is burning down.”

  “Yes, your royal highness,” he says, and I give him the finger as I head toward my room.

  I face-plant on my bed and fall asleep.

  Chapter 27

  Jesse’s Playlist: “Pictures of You” by The Cure

  It’s been eleven days, seven hours, and thirty-six minutes since I said goodbye to Vanessa, not that I’m counting. I have no idea what she’s doing, where she is or how she’s doing. Yet, I’ve done nothing but think of her and everything that’s happened.

  True to his word, Rick gave me two days to hide away and then I was forced back into the working world. It was like leaving a sauna and jumping into a glacial-fed river. The shock nearly stopped my heart. On the other hand, high-powered meetings and having to make decisions affecting thousands of employees has kept my mind busy, at least I’m not focused on Vanessa all the time, although her presence continues to be the background noise to my every waking second.

  I’m going through my morning emails when Rick walks into my office.

  “Please, do come in,” I growl.

  “Thank you, I will,” he retorts as he rounds my desk.

  “What?!”

  “You need to hear this,” he says.

  “Hear what?”

  He pulls up a live video feed of a popular radio talk show and turns the volume up on my laptop. I don’t understand, until I see Vanessa and hear her voice.

  “So, you’ve been taking some time off recently?” the DJ asks.

  “Yes, I have. I needed to deal with some personal things before I could finish the album,” she explains.

  “Does that have to do with a certain sexy CEO we’ve seen you with recently?” he continues.

  “Yes,” she says, but doesn’t elaborate.

  “So, things are going well between you two?” he asks.

  “Randy, you know I don’t comment about my private life,” she says and winks at him.

  “Oh, come on, our listeners would love to hear how happy you are,” he prods.

  I can see the sad look on her face and he pauses. “You are still together?”

  “No comment,” she says, trying to sound coy.

  He laughs. “Alright, I hear you have a new song you want to sing here for the first time,” he announces.

  “Yes, I actua
lly just dropped it a week ago, and I’m excited to share it with my fans today,” she says enthusiastically. “I hope it’s not too early for those East Coasters to be up and listening,” she continues.

  “Well, if not they can catch it online later, we’ll have today’s show up after we wrap up here shortly,” he reminds folks.

  There’s a pause and she sits in front of a keyboard and begins to a play a slow and enchanting melody. And then her voice fills the air.

  I saw you across the room,

  Magnetism like tides and the moon,

  I’m afraid of what comes after this,

  Then I forget everything with just one kiss.

  Why did you stay?

  What game do we play?

  I want to win,

  But I’m guilty as sin.

  I don’t deserve you,

  But I want you.

  I can’t be without you,

  What will I do?

  Don’t leave me now,

  Just tell me how.

  I need you to fix me,

  I need you to see.

  We belong together,

  And yes, I mean forever.

  Damn this pain,

  It’s making me insane.

  Feelings rush over me,

  And then I finally see.

  I can’t be without you,

  What will I do?

  Don’t leave me now,

  Just tell me how.

  I need you to fix me,

  I need you to see.

  We belong together,

  And yes, I mean forever.

  Can I make you see?

  I’m not the enemy.

  I need you to forgive.

  Without you, I can’t live.

  I’m falling at your feet,

  My heart isn’t replete.

  I’m begging you to come back.

  My heart is under attack.

  I can’t be without you,

  What will I do?

  Don’t leave me now,

  Just tell me how.

  I need you to fix me,

  I need you to see.

  We belong together,

  And yes, I mean forever.