A Haven for Her Heart

by Susan Anne Mason

  “I’ll be right outside the door if you need me,” he said before the swinging doors swallowed her up.

  “Daddy.” Sofia tugged on his sleeve. “When can I open my present?”

  He released a breath and turned his attention to his daughter. “When Olivia and your grandmother come back out.” He glanced at the door and bent to look her in the eye. “Or . . . you could take the present into the kitchen and ask Miss Olivia if you can open it.”

  Maybe Sofia would provide enough of a distraction to save Olivia from his mother’s interrogation.

  She went to skip off, but Darius put a hand on her shoulder.

  “And make sure Grandma’s being nice to her, Mouse.”

  Sofia giggled. “You’re funny, Daddy. Yiayiá is always nice to company.” She pushed through the door into the kitchen.

  Darius turned to see his father grinning at him.

  “That is one pretty lady you have there, son.” Papá waggled his thick brows.

  Heat ran up Darius’s neck. “Thanks, Papá. But she’s so much more than that.”

  “Ah, I understand. It’s a fortunate man who finds a woman with heart, intelligence, and beauty. One would do well to keep a treasure like that.”

  Darius quirked a brow. “I intend to. I just have to convince her that we belong together.”

  “Once you work your charm, she will come willingly.” His father bellowed out a laugh and clapped him on the shoulder.

  Darius eyed the kitchen door. How long should he give his mother alone with Olivia before he went to her rescue?

  Olivia followed Mrs. Reed into a homey kitchen. The woman set Olivia’s box on the table, which was already laden with platters, pots, and jugs. The room wasn’t terribly large, but it was filled with exotic scents that reminded Olivia of her mother’s kitchen at home. A window over the sink let in the warm breeze, bringing with it the sound of children’s laughter.

  “One minute while I check my sauce.” Mrs. Reed busied herself with a large pot on the stove. She was plump in stature, and her dark hair was styled in tight curls around her face. She reminded Olivia very much of her own mother.

  “Miss Olivia.” Sofia burst into the room, carrying the present.

  Olivia smiled on a wave of relief. “Yes, Sofia?”

  “My daddy said to ask you if I could open this now.” Her eyes brimmed with hope.

  Olivia glanced toward Mrs. Reed, who had paused her stirring. “If your grandmother says it’s all right, it’s fine with me.”

  Mrs. Reed wiped her hands on her striped apron. “Just this one present and then you go outside with the others.”

  “Thank you, Yiayiá.” Sofia set the parcel on a chair and began to tear into the wrapping. Soon ribbon and paper were scattered everywhere as the girl plucked the stuffed elephant out of the box. Olivia had found it in Woolworth’s toy department. It was gray with a large pink bow around its neck.

  “An elephant!” Sofia shrieked, hugging it to her chest. “I love elephants.”

  “Your daddy may have mentioned that.” Olivia laughed, delighted with the girl’s response.

  Sofia threw her arms around Olivia’s waist and squeezed. “Thank you, Miss Olivia. I love it.” She pulled away to examine the treasure more closely. “I’m going to name her Penelope.”

  “That’s a lovely name.”

  Mrs. Reed pointed with her wooden spoon. “Sofia, pick up the paper and take it to the trash.”

  “Yes, Yiayiá.” She tucked the elephant under one arm, scooped up the debris, then skipped out the door.

  “She’s a delightful child,” Olivia said. “So happy and well-mannered.”

  Mrs. Reed gave a snort. “You haven’t seen her when she’s having a tantrum.”

  “True.” Olivia chuckled. “Can I do anything to help?” She needed something to occupy her hands and keep her nerves at bay.

  “No, no. You are a guest. You sit and I get you some lemonade.”

  Seeing no escape, Olivia pulled out a chair and sat down. Seconds later, Darius’s mother placed a large glass in front of her. “You have a very nice home, Mrs. Reed.”

  “Thank you. We are comfortable here.” She opened the oven door, murmured something in Greek, then closed it again.

  Olivia took a sip of her drink, savoring the burst of flavor on her tongue. “This is delicious.” What could she talk to this woman about? Maybe she could get her talking about the rest of her family. “Darius tells me you have three other children.”

  Mrs. Reed’s features brightened. “Yes. I have another wonderful son and two daughters. And eleven grandchildren.”

  “My, that’s a large family.”

  “It’s nothing compared to back home. In Greece, most families have more than six children each.” She took a container from the icebox and set it on the counter. “But I think my family will be giving me many more grandchildren yet.” She fixed her dark eyes on Olivia. “I know my Darius wants brothers and sisters for Sofia.” She huffed out a long sigh. “If only God hadn’t taken his Selene.”

  Olivia squirmed on her seat. “I was very sorry to hear of his tragedy.” What else could she say? Olivia was out of her element with no idea of this family’s dynamics.

  “How about you, Olivia? You have a big family?”

  “I have three brothers. One is away at war.”

  “Oh, your poor mother. I was fortunate that none of my boys had to go.” She made the sign of the cross. “Like Darius, my Nicolas has a family to look after.”

  Olivia nodded. “My brother Leo lives at home and works in my parents’ store. And the youngest one, Salvatore, just became a priest.”

  “Ahh.” The woman’s face softened. “It’s always nice to have a priest in the family.”

  “We’re very proud of him.” Olivia let her gaze dart to the door, wishing someone would come in and provide a distraction. How long could she skirt all the topics that could force her to lie to this nice woman?

  “And you, Olivia? You want a big family someday?” Mrs. Reed stared right at her.

  Olivia swallowed hard and set her glass on the table. “I love children,” she said slowly, “and I will accept whatever family God sees fit to give me.”

  Mrs. Reed pursed her lips. “A wise answer. Only God knows our future.”

  The door opened, and Darius poked his head in. “How’s it going in here?”

  Olivia shot to her feet, relief flooding her system like a drug. “Fine. I offered to help, but your mother wouldn’t let me.”

  He smiled, coming farther into the room. “Of course not. You’re a guest.” He held out a hand to her. “I hope you don’t mind, Mamá, but I’m going to steal Olivia away now.”

  “We had a nice talk. You send your aunts in now to help.”

  “Yes, Mamá.” Grinning, Darius led Olivia out a side door and headed toward the rear of the house.

  Olivia breathed in the fresh air, allowing her tense muscles to relax for the first time since arriving at the Reeds’ home. With her hand securely tucked in Darius’s, she took a moment to savor the confidence he exuded and the heady sense of safety she felt in his presence.

  When he turned and sent her a wink, her heart hiccupped in her chest.

  It was becoming more and more difficult to resist his charms, and she found her resolve to distance herself wavering.

  The backyard was long and narrow, with a vegetable garden occupying most of the left-hand side. Blossoming vines covered the rear fence, and the right side of the yard was taken up with long tables, gaily decorated with balloons. Guests milled about the lawn, talking and laughing, and the smell of roasting meat drifted through the air.

  Darius nodded to the others but continued to the far corner of the garden.

  There, she was surprised to see a secluded nook with a wooden bench and a covered trellis that afforded them a degree of privacy.

  Darius tugged her down beside him, keeping her hand in his. “I hope my mother didn’t interrogate you too much.”
r />   “No, she was fine.”

  “Are you sure? You seem a little . . . overwhelmed.” His blue eyes radiated concern.

  “This is a lot to take in,” she admitted. She’d pictured a relatively intimate family celebration, but there had to be more than forty people here.

  “Thank you for putting up with it. And thank you for Sofia’s gift. She adores it.”

  A blush heated her cheeks. “I’m glad she likes it.”

  “She likes you more. And I must say I agree with her.” He grinned, then leaned forward and pressed his lips softly to hers.

  A thrill shot right through her, sending tingles dancing up her spine. When his hand came up to cup her face, every argument why she couldn’t be with him flew from her mind. She started to kiss him back, but the sudden realization of what she was doing dawned on her, and she quickly pulled away.

  “Your family is right over there,” she said.

  “No one can see us. Besides, I’ve wanted to do that all day.”

  He bent toward her again, but she laid a hand on his chest.

  “Behave yourself,” she whispered.

  A loud clanging sounded. “The food is ready,” a voice called out. “Everyone to the tables.”

  Darius groaned. “Saved by the dinner bell.”

  Her relief bubbled out in a laugh as they got up to join the rest of the group.

  “To be continued later,” he said in a husky voice, sending another parade of chills up her spine.

  For the rest of the celebration, however, they were never alone, which was probably for the best. Olivia sat by one of Darius’s many aunts, who regaled her with stories of Darius as a boy for the majority of the delicious meal. Olivia managed to deflect most of his aunt’s questions with vague answers and was relieved when all the attention turned to the birthday girl. Sofia beamed as she cut her cake and opened her gifts. When dusk fell and the singing and dancing started, Olivia rose to find the bathroom.

  Darius was waiting in the hall when she came out. “I’m sensing you might be ready to leave.”

  Shouts of “Opa!” echoed from outside.

  She nodded. “If you don’t mind.”

  “Not at all. Just let me tell my parents.”

  She bit her lip, her manners warring with her nerves. “I should say good-bye to everyone. . . .”

  “I would advise against that, or they’ll hold you hostage until you dance with all the uncles.” He laughed. “Don’t worry. I’ll tell them good-bye for you. Believe me, I know how much energy our family requires. You have to get used to us in small doses.”

  He was right. Even with a fairly large Italian family, Olivia had never experienced a gathering like this.

  Sofia ran up. “I have to use the bathroom.” Her battered crown slipped over one eye, and she pushed it up.

  Darius put a hand on the girl’s shoulder. “Say good-night to Miss Olivia first. She’s going home now. I’ll be right back with the car keys.” He strode away.

  Sofia’s nose scrunched. “You’re leaving already? It’s not even my bedtime yet.”

  “I know, honey.” Olivia bent down. “But I have to get up early tomorrow. Thank you for inviting me to your special day.” She hugged the girl, who squeezed her neck hard with slightly sticky fingers. Olivia tried desperately not to think that she might never see her again.

  “Thank you for my elephant,” Sofia said solemnly.

  “You’re very welcome.”

  The girl leaned closer to Olivia’s ear. “You know what I wished for when I blew out my candles? I wished you could be my mommy.”

  “Oh, sweetie.” A hard lump rose in Olivia’s throat. What she wouldn’t give to be this precious girl’s mother. To have the privilege of loving her and helping to raise her. If only she could be worthy of that honor. Not trusting her voice, she gave a forced smile and patted Sofia’s shoulder.

  Thankfully, Darius returned then. He kissed his daughter, promising to be back before she went to bed.

  As he escorted Olivia out to the car, her chaotic emotions churned inside her, leaving her more torn than ever before.

  37

  I’m sorry if tonight was too much for you,” Darius said quietly a few minutes later as they drove down the darkened streets.

  Olivia glanced over at him. “You don’t need to apologize. Your family is very . . . charming.”

  “Charming but overbearing.” One brow quirked up. “I should have known that such a big gathering might be too much for a first meeting.”

  She let out a sigh. “I did have second thoughts about coming, but I didn’t want to disappoint Sofia.”

  “Well, thank you. You made her day.”

  “It was worth it, then.” She focused on the streetlights ahead, but she couldn’t get Sofia’s wish out of her mind. The girl was already thinking of her as a potential mother figure. It wasn’t fair to let this go any further. But how did she go about removing herself from their lives when her heart railed at the very thought?

  Suddenly, Darius swerved into an empty parking lot. He stopped under a lamppost and turned off the engine.

  “All right. I can’t stand it anymore. I need to know what’s bothering you. You haven’t been yourself all night, and I’m sensing it’s more than just meeting my family.”

  She gripped her purse tighter. It was utterly unfair how the man could see right through her. She’d had no intention of starting such a serious conversation tonight, but now that he’d brought it up, perhaps it was for the best. “You’re right,” she said. “There has been something weighing on me.”

  “Did my mother do something to upset you?”

  “Not really. It was a combination of things that made me come to a realization.” She met his eyes. “One I don’t think you’re going to like.”

  He shifted on the seat, a wary expression on his face. “What is it?”

  Her heart squeezed, and she focused on the top button of his shirt. Lord, give me the courage to say what I must. “For your sake and Sofia’s,” she said slowly, “I think it’s best to end our relationship.”

  His nostrils flared. “What did my mother say—?”

  “It wasn’t her.” Olivia paused to choose her words carefully. “I realize now that I haven’t been fair, leading you to believe we might have a future together. I can’t be the wife you need or a good mother for Sofia.”

  His brows slammed together. “That’s not true.”

  “Yes, it is. For several reasons.” She released a slow breath. “I went back to my parents’ store this week. At first, Mamma hugged me, and it was almost like old times. But then one of our neighbors came in, and she wouldn’t even look at me. She said I was a disgrace to my parents. All the other customers were whispering about me. It was terrible.”

  “Olivia . . .” He reached for her, but she shook her head.

  “No, please let me finish.”

  He lowered his hand to his lap.

  “I know now that no matter how hard I try, I’ll never be respectable in most people’s eyes. I’m forever branded by the mistakes of my past.”

  He huffed out a breath. “I don’t care about that.”

  The air inside the car seemed overly warm. Olivia rolled down her window a few inches before continuing. “Today your mother was talking about big families—”she swallowed hard—“and how you want more children. That’s when I truly realized I wasn’t being fair to you.”

  He reached for her hand. “I’m not sure I understand, but whatever the issue, I’m sure we can resolve it.”

  The temptation to simply agree and rest in the warmth of his nearness tugged at her. But she needed to get the whole sordid story out in the open—now, before she changed her mind. “Let’s walk a little. There are some things I haven’t told you that you have a right to know.”

  Darius tried not to panic as they got out of the car and started down a deserted stretch of Danforth Avenue. They walked in silence for several minutes while Olivia seemed to wrestle with how to beg
in. Judging from the worry lines between her brows, whatever she was about to tell him was most likely unpleasant. He braced himself for what was to come, determined that nothing she said would shake his love for her or his certainty that they were meant to be together.

  “While I was at the reformatory,” she said at last, “I was treated . . . badly.”

  The hairs on the back of his neck rose. Was she abused by the guards? Or someone in authority? “You can tell me about it, Olivia, no matter how terrible it might be.”

  She gave him a grateful look, then turned to stare at the road. A truck rumbled by, expelling exhaust from a tailpipe. Once it passed, the street became still again.

  “There was a woman doctor there,” she said. “Those of us who were expecting babies were required to undergo weekly exams, at which time the doctor performed various . . . procedures on us.”

  Under a streetlight, he watched the color drain from her face. Alarmed, he guided her to a bench at a bus stop and sat beside her. “What sort of procedures?”

  Lines bracketed her mouth. “Surgical procedures. Injections. Burning chemical treatments. I don’t even know everything that was done, only that the pain was intolerable.” She closed her eyes, her lashes standing out against the pallor of her skin.

  Darius put his arm around her and drew her close, absorbing the tremors that passed through her. “I can’t imagine the terror you must have felt.”

  She nodded. “Twice afterward I was left alone in a basement cell for over a week with no relief from the pain, not even an aspirin, and very little food.”

  His eyes smarted as he tightened his arm around her. How could anyone treat another human being so cruelly? And the perpetrator was a doctor, no less. Someone who was supposed to protect and heal. “All this happened while you were pregnant?”

  She nodded again. “I thought I would miscarry from everything I’d been through, but somehow I didn’t.” Tears slid down her cheeks.

  He wanted to weep for her suffering. Instead, he offered her a handkerchief. “I’m so sorry, Olivia. I can hardly believe you came out alive.”

  “A few times, I thought I was going to die. I actually prayed that I would. But then I realized that if I did, my baby would die too. So I had no choice but to endure it.” A shudder went through her. “For a few minutes after Matteo was born, every bit of suffering seemed worth it—just to hold my baby at last.” A hint of a smile trembled on her lips. “But then he was taken from me without my consent, and suddenly nothing mattered anymore.” She blew her nose and moved away from his shoulder. “I’ve never told anyone what happened to me in there, not even Dr. Henshaw. I’m telling you now because . . .” She drew in a ragged breath. “I don’t think I’ll be able to have any more children as a result of what was done to me.” She raised her eyes to his. “You have the right to know that.”