Go Full Circle (A Go Novel Book 5)

by Scarlett Finn

  Clasping her glass in both hands, Harlow straightened her arms on the bar. “I’ve thought about that,” she said. “I knew I was attracted to him—”

  “We all knew you were attracted to him.”

  Harlow couldn’t blame Ryske for denying his feelings when she’d gone a step further and tried to fight her basic attraction to him. “I think I fell in love with him in Bale’s bedroom.”

  “Ha,” Dover said and smacked the bar. “We knew you were fucking in there. He denied it, but we knew it!”

  Harlow just smiled because the truth was, they hadn’t been having sex in Bale’s bedroom. Not his original bedroom where Ryske was laid up recovering from the stab wound that had brought them together. She’d been thinking of a different, non-sexual, moment. Of the moment when they’d heard the gunshots in the apartment and Ryske had leaped out of bed to protect her.

  Although he was still injured and under doctor’s orders, he’d commanded her to hide in the bathroom and put himself between her and danger. She’d told Ryske once that the moment he’d snagged her happened at Bale’s. That it was the moment he’d opened his eyes and asked about her welfare before his own.

  The love came after. The love came when she realized he wasn’t just the smooth talking, cocky jerk who could piss her off and charm her with the same sentence. There was substance to him. He had a heart. He cared. That was before she realized the depth of his commitment to his crew and their loyalty to each other.

  “Sometimes I miss those days,” she said, tracing a line around the edge of one of the new beer taps.

  “Of fucking in Bale’s bedroom?”

  “When he wasn’t allowed out,” she said, after taking a second to appreciate her friend’s joke. “When he was laid up in one place, and I could visit him, and always know he’d be there.”

  “If he thought you would come here to visit, he’d stay here all the time.”

  She finished her drink. “I wish he would,” she said. “How bad is his drinking?”

  “Worse than it’s been in a long time.”

  Harlow appreciated him not trying to soften the blow or coddle her. “And if I told you not to serve him?”

  He opened his arms. “There’s liquor everywhere. Even if I cleared the bar, it’s in the storeroom. And you know he doesn’t hear anything that he doesn’t want to. Saying no to him doesn’t make any difference. You could tell every liquor store in the neighborhood not to serve him and he’d still find a way… Strong-arming him isn’t the way to get him to do what you want.”

  Aggravated, she groaned and let her head fall to her flat hand. Scrunching her hair in a fist, Harlow was tempted to pull it out. “I know that… Do you know how infuriating this is for me? If I was here, I could make a difference. If I was here, I could have the fights with him. I could make him face me. Make him see that he was being self-destructive. If I was here, I’d let him fuck out his frustrations.”

  “Except, if you were here, he wouldn’t need any of that,” he said. “Your absence is what’s causing this.”

  “You know it’s rich,” she said, smacking her hand to the bar. “He was happy to waltz off and leave me here when we were sure Ophelia was going to demand him in the card game. I was expected to accept that. But things get flipped around, she picks me, and he thinks he can run off and be an idiot any time he wants. You know, part of the reason Ophelia picked me was to cause this kind of a rift between him and those he was closest to.”

  “Still your fault,” Dover said. His teasing was good-natured, meant to stop her from freaking out or losing her temper. To a certain extent, it was working; but she still wished she could do more to support her crew. “If you didn’t make him love you as much as he does, he wouldn’t even notice you’re not here.”

  “You don’t love me as much as he loves me,” she said, raising her chin to tease him back. “Do you notice that I’m not here?”

  He shrugged. “Paperwork’s piling up, so yeah. I notice there’s a new fire hazard.”

  “Did you get the fire marshal’s report? Are they sure it was arson?”

  “Yeah,” he said. “They traced accelerant from the door to the den along the corridor past the restrooms. They think it originated just inside the internal doorway of the stairwell… They’re investigating, but…”

  “You don’t think they’ll find anything.”

  “Don’t see how they can. We’re not exactly high priority around here—”

  “It’s not right,” she said.

  “But it is what it is. We accept it and move on. We got what we like and we like what we got.”

  It amazed her that he could feel any sense of optimism. The bar did look incredible, so she could understand that there was still hope for the future. But Floyd’s was his life. He’d been willing to die in an attempt to save it when someone had come along and tried to tear it down. It infuriated her; she could only imagine what it had done to him.

  Yet, he was there in front of her accepting there were things that couldn’t be changed.

  Harlow took his hand. “Once this crap with Ophelia is done, we’ll find out who did this. I promise.”

  Shaking his head, he took his hand back. “Whoever it was, they wanted to make a point. I’m not going to dignify that by letting them see they got to us.”

  “A point to make,” she said. “That’s what Animal said to me the night he was sent after Ryske, the night I met him.”

  “So?”

  “So, you don’t think… Animal has done just about everything else he could think of to take down Ryske. Why not fire too?”

  “Because Jarvis Hagan is dead and Ophelia Hagan is in love with Ryske. She wouldn’t endanger him.”

  “What about the rest of us?” she asked. “It feels strange to me that Ophelia has known where we are all this time, yet she’s never tried to approach the bar. She likes to be in the know, and likes others to know that she is… The only reason she’d stay away is if she wanted to be able to assert she’d never been here.”

  He didn’t dismiss her and bent to lean on his forearms. “If she’s investigated,” he said, but peered closer. “But why would she take the risk that Ryske might get hurt?”

  “She wouldn’t believe he’d get hurt. She’d believe he’d get out. He’s Superman to her, right? She was probably trying to hurt the rest of us… Even if she thought all of us would get out, if Ryske’s home is destroyed, who is he going to turn to… where is he going to sleep?”

  Dover pondered for a minute. “What was the last thing that happened with her before the fire? Anwen had just moved in, right? It was just after she got beat up.”

  “Yeah. Ryske went to Ophelia to tell her we were in for Pothos… Maybe he said something during that meeting that she didn’t like… It’s possible she was mad if he said anything in defense of Anwen… or made it clear he was acting under duress.”

  “We’ll need to talk to him about that. See what he remembers.”

  The reminder that she wouldn’t be around for that huddle made her sigh. “You’ll have to talk to him,” she said and looked at the clock above him behind the bar. “I won’t be here when he gets back.”

  “Why not stay tonight? Penzance can go back to whatever hole he lives in. You can spend the night with your crew.”

  She scratched her temple with a single finger. “I’m not sure I could take all of you at once.” She feigned a yawn. “It’s been a tiring night.”

  Dover turned to fill her glass again. “Maybe the other three would take you… You couldn’t have me.”

  This was a joke that wasn’t going anywhere fast. But that was good, she liked having inside jokes with her crew. Especially the ones that might give Ryske cause to pause.

  “I guess with Anwen up there, it’s moot anyway,” she said.

  “What’s her agenda?” he asked. “To hurt us? To punish Ryske for choosing you?” Widening his eyes, he nodded at her. “Your fault.”

  Sticking her tongue out at him, she
plucked her glass from his fingers. “I don’t think it’s malice. Maybe I just hope it’s not. I think she’s volatile, which is why I’m not comfortable with having her around. If she doesn’t trust us enough to share, I don’t think we should open our home to her.”

  “Makes sense.”

  “When she came to my parents to see me, and since then, I… I get more of a sense that she’s misguided than anything else. Yeah, I’m pissed at her for lying to us, but I get her position. It can’t be a nice place to be. She has no family. Technically, she’s dead. Any friends she tries to reconnect with will want to know why she lied to them.”

  “Ophelia was the only friend she really had, and we saw how that turned out.”

  Yeah, she got the crap beaten out of her. “Anwen knew who I was when she came back. I think her coming to thank me for offing Hagan was as much a cover for feeling me out as anything. She wanted to know who I was and maybe what Ryske saw in me. Apparently, he mentioned me to her when you guys were staying with her… You know, while he was dead too.”

  “A lot of that going around.”

  “As long as Hagan stays dead, I’m fine with it,” she said, which was a shame because in the end the man hadn’t been as bad as she originally thought.

  Maybe it was the false imprisonment and attempted rape that soured her opinion. Still, Jarvis wasn’t quite the villain his sister was. The female Hagan was certainly more devious.

  “You felt for his pulse yourself.”

  Which was why she was pretty sure he wasn’t still alive. Though, Harlow had to admit that most of that night was a blur.

  “Yeah,” she said. “But Bale convinced me Ryske was dead by turning off a bunch of machines… Maybe I’m not as savvy as I thought.”

  “You were young then, babe.”

  Maybe not much younger in body, but certainly in experience and smarts. “I won’t have to worry about that again,” she murmured.

  “Him faking his death? No,” Dover said.

  That hadn’t been what she meant. Tonight, she and Ryske had put words to what they would do if one lost the other. Ryske couldn’t take the risk of faking his demise or he’d risk losing her for real.

  “Lesson learned, I guess.”

  “So, if it’s not malice, why tell Ophelia she’s sleeping with Ryske? Does Anwen know you heard that?”

  “No, but she knows I saw the bracelet. I guess she’s counting on me not talking to you guys. Maybe she wants me to believe there’s something going on between them too. I don’t know. She doesn’t think I’ll be able to check, so whatever’s going on, I can’t tell Ophelia the truth.”

  “Well, you could,” he said. “You don’t need to check with any of us to know that it’s bullshit. But there wouldn’t be any point. Why help her out?”

  “Exactly. I don’t know if Ophelia believes her, or what’s going on. I think they’re competing. Anwen had Ryske when Ophelia wanted him. She doesn’t want Ophelia to think she’s losing her touch.”

  “So this is all about pride,” he said and shook his head. “You know what the sad part is?” Tipping her head back, she asked for the answer. “If either of them actually had him for more than twenty minutes, they’d probably send him back. He’s a pain in the ass.”

  She raised her glass and licked the edge. “Yeah, but he can eat pussy like no other man.”

  His scowl came with a groan this time. “Have I got to pay you to not talk like that?”

  “What can I say? I’ve been sex deprived for a month and he just switched me back on tonight. A lot of stuff is swirling around in my head. I think you’d be impressed by how restrained I’ve been.”

  “No,” he said. “Definitely not impressed.”

  They enjoyed their drinks and their thoughts for a minute in silence. “Anything on that USB I gave Ryske that was any use?”

  “Not so far,” he said. “Remind me to give you a blank one before you leave. Maze was talking about that. I think he has some somewhere.”

  “They’re in the desk drawer. I’ll grab one. There’s something I want to do upstairs before I leave anyway.” His suspicion narrowed on her. “Not that… not a sex thing… I just want to leave a gift for Ryske…” She paused. “Though, I don’t know what he’ll use it for.”

  “He doesn’t need anything for the spank bank. You guys have racked up plenty of material for that.”

  “Thank you, I’m glad he told you.” Dover hadn’t exactly said that, but it wouldn’t be the first time the crew had talked about their masturbation habits. “But this, I’m hoping, will have a more soothing effect. It’s something to try.”

  “Guess I can’t argue with that.”

  She got back to business, aware that time was running low. “I have one idea for how to get into Ophelia’s private files at the apartment. It’s the one place I can’t get near. There’s always someone around watching me. But if Maze could try maybe getting into her computer…”

  “I’ll ask. What do you want him to look for?”

  “Remember on the recording how Jarvis said his sister was unstable when they were kids?”

  “A crackpot, yeah.”

  “It would be good to have some evidence of that.”

  His curiosity grew. “Forming a plan, Nightingale?”

  “Maybe,” she said. “But I can’t do anything if I don’t have evidence of her… instability.”

  “He might be able to find that elsewhere if not in her private files… Don’t do anything dangerous without backup. Like you just said, she’s a crackpot.”

  Harlow hadn’t been the one to use that word, but she got his point. A noise at the far side of the bar made them both turn. For a minute, she was nervous that maybe they were about to be discovered by Anwen, who could blow the whistle to Ophelia.

  Instead, it was Noon who came in. “I have to pee,” he said, striding across the bar to head for the restroom.

  Wearing a smile, she turned to Dover as she hopped off her stool. “Isn’t he adorable?”

  “That’s one word for him,” he said. “Come on, let’s get you upstairs to leave that present for Ryske.”

  Having Dover with her was good cover. He’d be able to take responsibility for any sound she made.

  After sneaking into the closet and turning on the lamp, Harlow retrieved the blank USB and pulled a small rubber band from the drawer. Looping it tight around a section of her hair, she cut about four inches from a section, creating a lock of hair.

  It wasn’t much, but when she tiptoed out and went to Ryske’s bed, she kissed it before she slipped it beneath his pillow. All she could do was hope that when he was feeling low, he would use the gift as proof that she was still with him.

  18

  Harlow hadn’t been prepared for the moment Noon would pull up at the end of Ophelia’s block. The doorman would be able to report when she and Penzance had come back, so there was no point in trying to hide that they’d been out late. Noon was dropping them off out of sight of the building so that it would seem like they’d walked back. On the return drive, they’d got their story straight about which bars they’d gone to and what they’d drank.

  When Noon stopped and they twisted to look at each other, Harlow was filled with a sense of loss. Her friend would go back to Windsor’s now and wait to take Ryske and Maze home.

  “You be good,” she said, leaning over to hug him.

  “Call if you ever need a ride,” he said, his mouth turned toward her ear, his hand moving through her hair. “I’ll come get you anywhere.”

  Closing her eyes, she let herself breathe him in for a minute before leaning back to kiss him. Penzance was already on the sidewalk. He opened her door. Though she wouldn’t usually like to be rushed, she was grateful that he moved things along, or she’d have been tempted to stay in the car all night.

  Harlow got out, holding onto Noon’s hand for as long as she could, but eventually had to let Penzance pull her away. He kept hold of her, twining their arms together as he guided her
down the block.

  “You’re one busy bee, aren’t you?” Penzance asked. “That was an impressive round robin you just did there.”

  “Yeah, and it all started with getting laid,” she said.

  Recovering from the farewell blues, Harlow was boosted by a rush of adrenaline that made her feel upbeat. Not only had she seen her man, but she’d seen every member of her crew and her friends too. There hadn’t been time to go home and check in with her family, but keeping them out of the loop while she was possibly in harm’s way was in their best interest.

  “You’re welcome,” he said like he’d had something to do with it.

  They both knew he hadn’t, but he would have bragging rights and she wouldn’t be able to do a thing about it.

  “Yeah, for covering, I appreciate it.”

  “You know…” Taking her hand with his furthest one, he slid his other arm around her to pull her close. “Now that we’re fucking, we should…”

  “You finish that sentence with the word fuck and you won’t make it inside another building, let alone another pussy.”

  He laughed and skimmed his hand down her back to cup her ass. “I’m just saying, your goods are mine now.”

  That was what Ophelia would think and word would trickle down through the guys. Ophelia had probably already told Ryske about what she’d come across. But Ryske would know he’d been in that room and that nothing had happened.

  One thing she hadn’t thought about was being at Ophelia’s with Penzance. They’d have to act like they were an item… and that could mean being amorous in front of Ryske.

  Early in their relationship it had been established that she may have to see Ryske with other women. Harlow had never thought that she would have to fake a relationship in front of him.

  The proposition was interesting. She would never follow through in private with Penzance. But she’d feel better if she’d had the chance to discuss it with Ryske. If for no other reason than to get some advice. The man did have vast experience in this area. Penzance could offer advice, as he’d done work similar to Ryske. But Harlow knew which man she’d trust more.