by Rhys Everly
“I am.”
I walked over to him and draped my hands over his neck, giving him a kiss.
“You can tell me the truth,” I said.
“I am,” he told me. “I know I shouldn’t be, but I am.”
“What do you mean?”
“I know any normal human being wouldn’t be after everything that happened, but I’d take this new reality over my old one any day of the week. People are actually nice to me for once. Some more genuinely than others, but it’s better than being pointed at like you’ve got the plague and being talked to like you murdered their dog.
“My mom is back and willing to be a better mom than he was before, which is a major improvement to a shitty, abusive dad. I know he left me behind, but at least he accepts me for who I am. Not that it would matter if he didn’t.
“And I’ve got you. My life is so much richer for it. So yeah, I’ll take this new and improved Cedarwood life over anything.”
I wanted to tell him he was weird and his reasoning didn’t make any sense, but who was I to do such a thing?
It had taken me two months to pull my head out of my ass and admit my feelings for Hudson. I wasn’t the most reasonable man in the world.
And after everything he’d been through, who could blame him for wanting to feel a tinsy bit normal?
Yeah, maybe I’d react differently if my mom tried to come back after years of abandonment and tried to explain herself for leaving me, or I might have told everyone to fuck off if they started being nice to me when they’d been hostile for such a long time, but Hudson and I weren’t the same, and that was definitely for the best.
This way we complimented each other. We helped each other.
“And I know my dad will probably never talk to me again, but I think that’s for the best, too,” he said, and I pressed myself closer to him.
“He doesn’t deserve you anyway,” I said.
The truth is, I’d love to be able to bridge that gap between them, but some gaps were too big to recover from, and Jack Bell was too much of a douchewaffle to deserve any bridging, anyway.
Maybe one day, somehow, by some miracle, Hudson would be able to come to terms with his father’s douchewafflery, but until then, we weren’t gonna hold our breaths.
“No,” he said, and I looked into his eyes, those grey eyes I had denied myself for such a long time.
How could I have done such a thing? I was a douchewaffle, too, that was how.
“He doesn’t deserve me. You’re right. It’s taken a long time, but I can see it now.”
I lifted the balls of my feet to give him another kiss and squeeze him that much tighter.
“That’s my man,” I said.
I felt his smile tickling the sides of my face, and he pulled at my lower lip with his teeth.
“I like the sound of that.” He exhaled, and I took his breath in like I’d been starved of oxygen.
“I can say it again,” I mumbled.
“Yes,” he simply said.
“My man,” I obeyed.
“Again,” he said.
“My. Man,” I said, and my tongue teased at his teeth for entry.
Our tongues met in a fury of dance, and his erection grew against my crotch. The moan that escaped his mouth made my skin crawl with need for him.
“I love you, Nathan Karagiannis,” he said when he pulled away from our kiss for a moment.
“I love you, Hudson Bell,” I said.
His greys gaze pierced me with its intent, and he kissed me again.
“Show me,” he said and backtracked to the bed until we fell on it.
I sat on him and unbuttoned the nice shirt he’d insisted on wearing to meet his mom while attacking his mouth with mine.
Once that was out of the way, I pushed him back on the bed and trailed my kisses along his upper body. Following the veins on his arms. The mounts of his ribbed chest with the hairs roughing my tongue. His almost perfect six-pack.
I wanted all of him, and yet I couldn’t take enough of him.
I’d been so stupid. So stupid. Trying to apply reason to my heart, but there was no reason with love, was there? There were so many variables. Variables that couldn’t be predicted, or controlled with a list, or with reasonable thinking.
I’d been blind.
So blind, I didn’t even see my own feelings for him, or whenever they attempted to make an escape, I’d tried to deny them.
The more I was with him, the more I finally started to see how blind I’d been. Not only to deny him, but to not see Sweet_Peaches in him, too. How was that for a genius?
If anyone ever referred to me as a genius again, they had a story coming, because when it came to the good stuff, the real stuff, I was an idiot.
An idiot in love.
Hudson groaned, and I massaged my hands against his sides. I couldn’t give less of a fuck if anyone heard us. If they knew what was good for them, they’d all go downstairs and have a feast. Because this was my time with Hudson, and no one was ruining it.
Our first time in a bed.
He’d been way too upset after yesterday’s events to feel like having sex, but whatever tonight’s meeting had offered him, whether closure or a new beginning, had reignited his passion.
I unbuttoned his pants and took them off along with his underwear before pressing my face on his crotch and taking in his scent.
His manhood was hot to the touch, and I ran my tongue along his length to cool it down, but it only made my own boner hotter and harder.
“Fuck me,” Hudson said, and I looked up.
“What?” I asked, climbing back to him and taking his face in my hands.
“Fuck me,” he repeated, barely a whisper, but deafening in my ears.
“Are you sure?” I asked.
He nodded.
“Show me how much you love me. I want you in me. Please,” he said.
“Well, since you asked so nicely,” I smirked.
Hudson’s hands snapped me closer to him, one hand squeezing my lips against his, the other tightening flat on the back of my head, pressing me closer.
My own hands hooked on to his ass, and he crossed his legs over my hips, giving me access to his hole.
I teased his muscle with a finger, and another groan ripped out of him and into my mouth.
I brought my thumb up to his lips. He pulled away from our kiss and sucked on it, his tongue making circles around it. His cheeks hollowing, promising of what was to come.
When I pulled my thumb out, I brought it down to his hole and pressed it against him. It broke through, and Hudson gasped.
“Don’t stop,” he begged, and I slid my thumb in and out of his tightness while my cock pulsed with need for it.
I crawled down, removing my thumb from his rim and instead, pushed the tip of my tongue in it.
“Oh God,” Hudson moaned.
I licked his hole in every different way and stroke possible, making my man, my man, squirm under my every touch.
He thought he’d done so much for me, when, in fact, he’d opened my eyes to all the possibilities. What I’d done for him was nothing in comparison. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t have found my happy ever after. By his side.
I got up, and he followed me around the room as I got to my backpack.
“Where-where are you going? Why did you stop?” he asked.
I laughed as I unzipped the front pocket.
“We’re doing this the right way, my handsome,” I said and pulled out the lube.
Hudson smiled as I walked back to him, flipped the lid open and squirted both of us with some of its contents.
“Oh, that’s cold,” he exhaled.
I laughed.
He was the cutest. So innocent, yet so raunchy. So handsome, yet so giving. Nothing—nothing—like the man he’d been in high school. Because that man never existed. It had been a mask that took control of him for too long.
The Hudson in front of me now? That was the real Hudson. And I didn’t know what I’d d
one to deserve him.
I gave my cock a few strokes to spread the lube before I pressed the tip against him, which gave Hudson cause for more groaning.
He used his hands to guide me further in or to stop me at the start, but once we built up a rhythm and he got used to the pain, he took pleasure each and every time my cock hit his prostate.
It was exhilarating, being inside him, giving him so much satisfaction, seeing the look on his face as he got accustomed to the feel of me.
“Oh my God. That-that’s so good,” he moaned, and I bent over him to give him a kiss.
I might never have been much for sex before I got with him, but I could see us having a lifetime of good, orgasm-inducing sex, and I couldn’t fucking wait.
I couldn’t wait to see what life had in store for us.
My stomach sunk and my breath caught, and as I felt my orgasm coursing through me, I wrapped one hand around Hudson’s cock and rubbed it in sync with my grinding.
“Oh-my-I’m gonna come,” I bit into his lips.
“Come in me, babe,” he cried. “I want your cum in me.”
It didn’t take much more than that to unravel. My body stiffened and then weakened just as quickly. We breathed into each other’s mouths, and that made me find a semblance of strength to be in my body again. It turned out all it took was a kiss from Hudson and I was myself again. Almost.
With his right hand, he ran circles over my buttocks, and his other hooked on to his boner—which I’d foolishly let go when I’d come—and he started stroking himself.
I was spent, but if there was one last thing I wanted to do, that was making him unravel, too.
I pulled out and pressed closer to his cock, my mouth hanging open, my tongue rubbing against his knuckles as he stroked. We stared at each other, me hungrily waiting for his seed, Hudson letting his orgasm creep out of him.
And when it did, I wrapped my mouth around his tip and swallowed. His palm rested on my face until I cleaned him up and tasted every drop of his hot seed. It tasted of Hudson. Of my man.
When I laid in bed next to him, he cuddled me, and we kissed each other to sleep. Like a sexy, erotic lullaby I could get used to.
“I love you,” I said just before sleep took me in its bosom.
“I love you more,” Hudson said.
No.
No he didn’t. And if he really did, then I had to spend a lifetime proving him I loved him more.
That I wanted to love him more.
Because he deserved it. Unconditionally.
Epilogue
2 months later
My phone buzzed as the email came through.
Nathan, who was sitting next to me the entire evening, looked at my phone and peeked at the screen.
“Everyone,” he said, turning to the rest of the party. “Shut up. He’s got an email.”
“Nathan. Language,” Yaya said from the dining table where she set a tray of canapes for everyone.
I clicked on the email, then at the link, and while the screen loaded, I looked around the room and all the party guests.
I’d wanted something simpler, like a night in our apartment in New Harlow with just the two of us and a cupcake for dessert.
Well, cupcake and sex.
But Nathan, Yaya, and Mom—well everyone, really—insisted we throw a big party to celebrate both my twenty-second birthday and my GED results.
The Math exam was the last one pending. The one I was just waiting to load now.
Mom was there with Trish and Ella. Ella was playing with Summer, dragging Romeo rugged around the room. Luke and Charlie were huddled together playing some drinking game no one else was privy to. Andy and Kyle were there, Andy looking gruff sitting on the armchair next to the fireplace while Kyle was helping Yaya and making sure everyone had enough food and drinks.
Henry, the library guy, was there, chatting with Nicky, and Rohan and his brother were engaged in conversation with Rachel, Andy’s bar manager.
It was incredible how much life could change in such a short time.
Two months ago, I barely had a family, barely had a life or any future.
Two months later, my family had grown by several numbers. Yaya had taken me in and looked after me like I was her own grandchild. Andy had been very supportive and even offered me a job at his bar while we tried to figure out what we were doing, which, all things considered, wouldn’t work, so I’d had to decline. Kyle had quickly become a friend. After warning me about the side-effects of hurting Nathan, which included choking, first-degree murder, skinning, and a lot of nut-kicking.
Mom had been there for me, us, every weekend. Trish and he had decided to move closer to home so we could make up for the lost time. They still hadn’t found the perfect house, but they would. New Harlow had ample space for them.
“Come on, what does it say?” Nathan asked.
Everyone was looking at me, waiting for the answer.
“Don’t be scared. Whatever it says, it’ll be fine,” Mom said.
I wasn’t scared. Passing my GED and getting my diploma had become a secondary goal in my life.
Before I reunited with Nathan, I didn’t have a future in Cedarwood Beach, or anywhere, really. Not as far as I was concerned. Passing my exams was my way of feeling in control of my life. The only thing I could control other than getting a job.
But now, after all this time, after everything that had happened, after all the people and things I’d gained, a silly little number on a blank screen wasn’t going to dictate my life.
I was half-way through a novel, finally, after endless conversations with Nicky and her author friends. Turns out there were more in the area than I’d have ever thought. And they met bi-weekly to write, chat, or exchange marketing tips.
My job at Espresso Blues was going well. I was getting promoted to supervisor as Natalie was pregnant and would leave her job after she gave birth to work from home.
And Nathan? Nathan was the single best thing that had ever happened in my life, and I was still scared I’d wake up and find out he was just a dream.
But it was getting better. The fear of losing him. It helped that he was the kindest person in the world. And patient. Most times.
“Come on,” he grumbled next to me. Not his most shining moment.
I smiled at him, at everyone, and lifted my phone to read the result.
“190,” the screen said in big, bold numerals, and I read it out loud.
The room erupted in cheers and an applause, and Nathan pulled me into his arms to kiss my temple.
How the hell had that happened? How had I aced math of all things?
The flutter that shot through my body from Nathan’s kiss gave me all the answer I needed.
“I told you you could do it,” he said.
“Only because of you,” I told him, my eyes burning him with my gaze. I could tell because his skin went red.
But before I could kiss him or do anything else, the lights went out and Luke came in with a ginormous cake full of candles.
When the hell had he got off his chair, and when did they all light up those candles?
They sang for me, and Summer and Ella came to sit on my lap, jumping for joy, waiting for me to blow out the candles.
“Can we do it? Can we do it?” Ella asked.
“Ella, that’s his wish,” Trish said next to Mom.
“It’s okay,” I said, and Ella smiled. “Let’s do it together. On three.”
I counted out loud. And in my head, trying to find what else there was to wish for.
One.
Happiness? I already had it.
Two.
Success? I was willing to work hard for it. I didn’t need a wish for that.
Three.
Love? I had the most beautiful man in the whole wide world. No wish could top that.
So I went with the next best thing.
Summer, Ella, and I blew the candles out just as I thought of my wish.
Make all of Nathan’s dr
eams come true.
Do you want to find out how Hudson made Nathan’s dreams come true? What happened to both of them way down the line?
Click here to download the bonus epilogue that jumps three years into the future on a very special day in both characters’ lives…
Or visit www.rhyswritesromance.com/download-rogue-affair-bonus
A Letter from Rhys
Oh my, what a rollercoaster, am I right?
This book took everything out of me and gave it back to me tenfold. It was so much fun to write and I can’t believe it’s finished.
For those of you in my Facebook group, you might have heard me talk about this book and how it was originally supposed to be another age gap romance between Nathan and one of Andy’s best friends.
But then Sex Education happened.
You know. The Netflix show that’s soooo freaking good on soooo many levels.
And due to a storyline on the show (I won’t spoil anything) Hudson was born.
I won’t lie to you.
It took a lot of time to figure out what to do with him. How to make him relatable. How to make him loveable despite his faults. How to make him redeemable.
This book was never supposed to have any online chatting. That was meant for another book in the series, but it fit. As did Nathan’s crazy list. And all the backstory.
One by one the pieces fell into place and they created… Rogue Affair.
Writing this book was both a challenge on writing empathetic characters and a blast that helped me find out more about myself as a writer. And a person.
I truly hope you enjoyed it. If you did, leaving a review on Amazon would greatly help other readers find out why they need to read this book.
If you didn’t, then that’s okay too. Not every book is for everyone. However there’s two more books in the series that you might enjoy.
I’m taking a very small break from this series to start my new one, a Teacher/Student forbidden romance series set in Harlow U called A Proper Education. The first book should be out in fall.
The next book in Cedarwood Beach will tackle Charlie’s story and how he finds his way back to his hometown and how he finds the love of his life… in the eyes of his new boss.