Listen With Your Heart

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Listen With Your Heart Page 5

by Max Hudson


  He appraised them. “I don’t think there’s a single picture of you wearing anything other than dark jeans or leather pants.”

  “I prefer stuff like this,” I admitted.

  He smiled a small smile at that and then looked back at my clothes. “Do you have a shirt that matches?”

  I riffled through until I found a crisp white short-sleeved button up that had embroidered pink flowers on the collar. “My mom sent me this.”

  “She’s got good taste.” He plucked a blue ball cap off of a shelf. “Now all you need are sunglasses.”

  “Won’t that be suspicious?”

  “It’s Summer,” he said like that would make it okay.

  I found a fairly simple pair of sunglasses and took the baseball cap from him. I tried to shove all my black hair under it but I was having trouble.

  “Here, let me help.” He took the hat from my hands and gently pushed my unruly hair back until it was hidden under the cap. My skin prickled where his finger brushed though my hair like the ghost of his touch was still there.

  “Now let’s get out of here,” Nate announced.

  “What if they see through it?” I asked, feeling the shaking in my hands return.

  “Then I’ll carry you out of there again.” He shrugged. “You don’t have to go down there if you aren’t comfortable. I just hate that you have to be locked up here like you’re Rapunzel.”

  I hated it too. I just learned to deal with it. “Let’s do it.”

  A sort of evil looking grin spread over Nate’s face. “Hell yeah. We’re going to have to take the stairs, will that be a problem? I can carry you.”

  I shoved him playfully. “I can handle it you asshole.”

  “Oh, I’m the asshole now?” His grin didn’t falter for a moment.

  “I’m not Lane Daughtry right now remember? I’m Lane. Just Lane.”

  “Lead the way then, Just Lane.”

  We went through the stair exit and I locked my apartment behind me. As I did it, I realized I probably would never see the place ever again. My manager would send movers to collect all of my things and move me into my new place, wherever that might be. I left the key in the lock and turned around. I missed my privacy. I wouldn’t miss the apartment.

  Nate looked at me strangely but didn’t say anything and let me pass him to start down the flights and flights of stairs. It was tiring but we made it down eventually. I stood before the door to the lobby for a moment. I felt Nate’s presence behind me. I pushed the door open and strode into the lobby. There were people inside being held back from the elevator and stairs by the frazzled employees who didn’t deserve to deal with this today. They looked over at Nate and I and I was sure every single eye on us recognized me. It would only be seconds before they rushed me.

  But it didn’t happen.

  I froze for a moment but Nate kept moving and kept me going with him. He walked like there was no reason for us to be worried, like he just had somewhere else to be. We moved through the crowd as it passed us by trying to get in to find a popstar who was standing right next to them and walking on by.

  We eventually made our way out of the crowd and started heading down the street. Once we were a block away, I grabbed Nate’s arms to get him to face me. “Oh my God?”

  He smiled as he read my lips. “I told you.”

  “But no one even looked twice!”

  “Part of it is the disguise and the other part is being so confident you know where you’re going that no one dares question you or stop you.”

  “I’m free,” I said and looked around the city I had never walked around without an escort. “I’ve lived here for years but I’ve never learned anything about it. Where should we go?”

  “That’s a shame,” Nate said seriously. “I love this city. But I think you should pick something to do and I’ll take you there. You deserve a tour.”

  “Maybe dessert?”

  He nodded sagely. “I know just the place.”

  We walked through the city silently as we passed by people enjoying the late evening together. Not a single person recognized me. I wished I could talk with Nate but to make sure he could read what I was saying we would have to stop and stand still. I remembered Bunny and Nate conversing easily in sign language. How hard could it be to learn?

  He took me to his favorite ice cream spot. It was run out of a window by a nice couple who knew Nate’s name. I ordered that same thing he did, rocky road, and sat under some umbrellaed tables. There was a nice breeze coming from Puget Sound and that along with the ice cream perfectly contrasted with the warm evening air.

  “I want to do more,” I said as soon as we were finished.

  “It’s getting kind of late, but I can take you on a whole tour tomorrow.”

  “I’d love that,” I said too quickly. I wasn’t used to being so open, so eager.

  “I know you don’t have a place to go but if you’re okay with it, my apartment has two bedrooms. I can’t get the other one leased out for the life of me.”

  “You’ll let me stay over?”

  “Yeah. It has a guest bed in it already for when Bunny stays over. The last guy who lived there left it because he didn’t want to pay to move it.”

  My manager would insist I stay at a hotel in a completely different city. And he was probably right, staying with Nate would be too risky. But God, I was supposed to be some rebel. It was time I actually did some rebelling that I wanted to do.

  “I’ll take you up on that.”

  Chapter Nine

  Lane

  I woke up the next morning more rested than ever. Usually after I woke up, I already felt like I needed a nap. But I practically bounced out of bed after spending one night at Nate’s. What was it about the totally empty spare room with mismatched sheets that made me feel so energetic? I just didn’t worry as I went to bed that night. I felt safe here. It felt more like home than any place I’d stayed in years.

  I stepped out into the hallway in the large t-shirt and gym shorts Nate let me borrow as pajamas. I wish I had more foresight and brought a bag of clothes with me. But I didn’t have any more clothes that were Just Lane’s style and the thought of borrowing one of Nate’s flannels filled me with a kind of giddy excitement so I wasn’t too upset.

  I entered the kitchen and found it and the attached living room empty. Nate was a late sleeper it seemed. I started his coffee pot with ease and waited for the drink to percolate. While I waited, I checked my phone. Of course there were missed messages and voicemails. I scrolled through them and decided that I couldn’t ignore my responsibilities forever.

  “Lane, where are you?” Mr. Smart was always to the point.

  “I stayed over at a friend's since my apartment was compromised,” I tried not to let any emotion into my voice.

  “A friend’s.”

  “And you don’t have to worry about finding me a new place. I’ve already found one.”

  “Lane, it’s not that I don’t trust you, but I know several secure apartment complexes…”

  “Like the last one?” There was an icy edge to my voice.

  “We are interviewing every employee that had access to that information and we’ll find who leaked it. If not, we’ll fire them all and start over.”

  I balked at that. “You don’t have to fire anyone but the person who leaked it.”

  “Sure Lane,” he said like I was a child he was placating. I hated when he took that tone with me. “But I have to know where you are.”

  “That’s not in our contract.”

  “Lane…”

  “I would feel safer if nobody knew where I was living for now. If you need me just call and I promise I’ll answer promptly from now on, okay?” I tried to be firm. It was hard to tell my manager no.

  “What about security?”

  “I hired security too.” I was just telling lies one after the other.

  “It is your vacation…” he said slowly.

  “Thank you.” I breathed out a lon
g sigh.

  “But I want to know your address the moment we get the mole out of here,” he added sternly.

  “That’s fine.” Honestly, it was a better compromise than I was expecting.

  “I’ll let you get back to your vacation,” he said in a voice that was hard to read.

  “Thank you, Rupert.”

  “You’ll be hearing from me soon Lane.”

  “Of course.” Before I could even finish the words his end of the line went dead.

  I stared at the phone until I realized the coffee machine had been done ages ago. I poured myself a cup and drank it black even though I prefer it to be filled with sugar and milk. Nate said I could help myself to anything but I couldn’t bring myself to take anything more than what it took to make the cup. I was nervous about using too much of something. I wanted to prove I could be a good houseguest and maybe could become a good roommate.

  I hadn’t brought up the idea of me taking his spare room yet. The idea came to me the moment I said it to Mr. Smart. If he didn’t say yes...I really would be on my own.

  The front door opened and I nearly dropped my cup of coffee. I leaned out of the kitchen to see Nate walking through the front door, the front of his t-shirt with the sleeves cut off damp with sweat. He set his bag on the ground by the door as he kicked his shoes off. I wasn’t sure how to get his attention so I stood in the arch of the kitchen entrance and watched him. I knew he was strong but seeing his muscles on full display was something else.

  Finally, he looked up and I saw surprise on his face when he saw me.

  “Ah. You’re up.”

  “I thought you were sleeping in,” I admitted. “Do you want coffee?”

  “Oh damn, you made your own.”

  “Was I not supposed to?” I felt my panic begin to return.

  “No. It’s fine, it's just if I’m going to show you around Seattle, I have to take you to a local coffee place.”

  “I can go for another cup,” I promised. “On tour, by this hour, I would have had three already.”

  “They work you that hard huh?”

  “I have dances I do along with the songs and singing for a couple hours is tiring. I have a lot of late nights and early mornings moving from town to town.”

  He let out a whistle. I wondered what that felt like to him. “Well I’m not going to treat this like a dance practice or whatever, we’ll go at your pace.”

  I took a sip of my coffee to hide my grin and distract from the warmth growing in my cheeks. I set the cup in his sink and braced myself. “I’m ready.”

  “We’ll have to find you something to wear. I know we’re very different sizes but I bet I could find a shirt that fits. Sorry for not giving you time to get anything packed.”

  “It’s not a problem,” I assured him. “Not a problem at all.”

  ***

  Snug in one of Nate’s flannels that shrunk in the wash, we headed to his favorite coffee shop around the corner from his apartment. It was a trendy place with black and white walls, gold painted decorations, and plants hanging everywhere. I got a vanilla latte and he got a cappuccino. We took the drinks with us as we walked to the next place on his mini tour.

  “The Space Needle?” I looked up at the towering building that I’d seen quite often but only ever in the distance.

  “I thought it was best to take you to the most touristy spot first while it was still early and before it got too busy,” he explained. “It was the first place I went when I moved here.”

  After we made it up to the top, as we looked out from the windows out at the city, I got a little brave. I tapped his shoulder until his blue eyes fell on my lips. “When did you move here?” I asked, I was eager to learn everything about Nate. Or at least as much he wanted me to know.

  “About oh almost 10 years ago now.”

  “How old were you?”

  “I was eighteen years old.”

  “Wow. That’s so young. Was it for college?”

  He shook his head. “I never went to college. I came out here and started working immediately. There were some issues at home. We never had a lot of money and I had a couple other younger siblings. I took what little savings I had and split it in half. I took one half with me and gave the other half to my parents. I left so they'd have more funds for the other kids around.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that.

  “Why’d you move out here?” He asked back.

  “Remember how I was telling you about my mom’s diner?” My story felt silly in comparison. “Well I sang in the choir in town and I loved it so much I used to practice while I was wiping down tables if the guests could stand it so I could get used to performing for crowds. My manager happened to be passing through and heard me. Then all this happened. I was twenty-one. I thought I was going to spend my whole life working at that diner.”

  “Life is funny like that.”

  “Yeah…” We both turned away and looked out at the rolling ocean.

  ***

  Next, he took me on a tour of the underground passages left behind after a disaster. Then we looked at different gardens and sculptures. I never realized all of this was right outside my doors. Miraculously, my disguise continued to hold up to scrutiny. It helped that Nate avoided calling me by my name. But still, when people weren’t actively looking for me, it seemed like I was just anyone.

  “Before we go to dinner,” Nate said toward the end of our long day together. “Ferris wheel time. Unless you are afraid of heights.”

  “As long as you’re there I shouldn’t have to fear anything.” It was a ridiculously cheesy thing to say but I had really never felt safer. Even with all the security I’d had for years no one ever made me feel like this.

  He laughed. “We’ll see how you feel once you get up there.”

  We waited in a line for a bit and eventually we got our own seat. Alone in the carriage we slowly lifted higher and higher. The sun was beginning to set. Yesterday I had been about this high up in my apartment looking at the sunset, but it was better here.

  “Crazy view, right?” He said like he also hadn’t seen the same thing I did yesterday.

  “It is.”

  He leaned back and we both looked back and forth trying to capture every little detail of the ground getting further and further away.

  Heights didn’t scare me. What I was about to ask scared me.

  The next time his eyes passed over me I mouthed his name.

  He quirked up an eyebrow.

  We were at the very top so if this went poorly, I’d be stuck in the carriage with him the whole way down. “About your empty room in your apartment, can I stay there? I mean can I rent it.”

  I held my breath and eternity passed as I held on to it.

  The air escaped as his grin cracked. “Finally. A willing tenet. You’ll have to learn how to live with a deaf guy,” he joked.

  “I will.” Nate could have been anything and I’d still want to be near him.

  Chapter Ten

  Nate

  “You let him move in with you.” I wished Bunny would just react in some way and stop staring at me like that. It was creepy.

  “Yes.”

  “Just like that.”

  “Yes.”

  “After a romantic Ferris wheel ride.”

  “It wasn’t romantic. It was a tourist thing. Lane had never even been to Puget Sound before, and he’s lived here for three years.”

  “A few weeks ago, you had no idea who he was and once you did, you told me quote: “why do you want to sign him Bun? He seems like an ass” or something along those lines.”

  I groaned. “Your impression of me sounds too proper.”

  “I’m just trying to get the facts straight.”

  “He needed a place to stay where no one would think to find him and I needed a roommate to take on half the rent. I thought it was the perfect opportunity.” I thought I was telling the truth but Bunny seemed to look through me, straight to my heart. She saw something
I didn’t.

  “Isn’t it risky?” She asked without the seriousness the question deserved. “If you’re both seen together your private life could be ruined.”

  I had thought about that but I still said yes. “I think he’ll be an interesting roommate. And if he needs to practice at all hours of the morning or night, I won’t be able to hear it and complain. We’re a match made in roommate heaven.”

  “What if someone breaks in, a fan, or worse, hundreds of them?”

  “I’ll protect him.” I said without thinking. I blinked. “I want to protect him.”

  “There it is.” She got up from her desk in her fancy office at the record label and took my hands. She seemed to be trying to get me to hear something.

  “What is it Bun?”

  “I know you’re looking for a purpose. And I think it’s good you found a weird closeness with Lane. But I hope you know you shouldn’t make him your purpose. He’s not going to stay at your place forever. You need to keep looking.”

  I looked away. I didn’t want to see her say anything else. “I am still looking.”

  She gripped my hands tighter. I couldn’t see if she said anything but I felt the strong sense that she just wanted me to be happy.

  “Thank you. But I am pretty happy right now,” I murmured and finally faced her again.

  “I’m glad. Truly.” She let go and smiled a little at me. “Now stop wasting time around here and go help your new roommate move his furniture or something.”

  “My last text from him did say something about a bookcase.”

  “Shoo then. Just remember what I said.”

  I nodded. “I will. Promise.

  I knew Lane couldn’t be the purpose, the companionship I was looking for. He had to go on tour eventually. He was on vacation. And vacations ended.

  But for now, I wanted to make sure he had a good vacation because so far it sucked. I wasn’t going to make Lane my purpose. But maybe my temporary purpose could be to help him have a not so bad time. That seemed reasonable to me.

  ***

  I got back to an apartment filled with boxes like I was being invaded by them. Lane told me he had ‘purchased a few things’ for his room but this seemed like a lot more than ‘a few’.

 

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