by Lara Swann
They finally arrived. We’re here. Wherever ‘here’ is.
The long drive has finally led to something.
I slink down in my seat as I watch from a group of cars all parked in a row on the other side of the street, trying to make out what’s going on - what this place is. I grab my camera too, holding my breath as I squint in the direction of the garage.
Two guys have gotten out of the van now and they’re - they’re handing something over to someone else. The keys, maybe?
I look around the garage at the groups of vans parked inside, all in varying states of repair and upkeep, and spot one being pulled through some sort of machine in the center of the large yard.
It’s a little late to be working, isn’t it?
I frown as I look over - and as the van comes out the other side, my stomach flips as I see the difference. It’s a bit brighter and less worn looking, but that’s not what catches my gaze. It’s the side of the van - that’s now completely white. I didn’t make out whatever marking or logo it had before, but whatever was there is completely gone.
I bite my lip as I look at the other vans in the yard, with or without markings - Digital Solutions Limited still exactly where the guys parked it - and I can’t help my suspicions. Was that logo just spray-painted on for a while? Is this really a van belonging to that company? Does the company even exist?
I have no idea, but when that van is driven away and another van is pulled through, I grab my camera. I zoom in and manage to get shots of the van before it goes through - the logo of some company I can’t quite make out on it - and then take a few more while it’s in there, now identifying the paint being sprayed over it all. It’s not the Digital Solutions Limited van, but it shows what they’re doing at least. I take a few more pictures of the Digital Solutions Limited van in the yard, and the two guys talking with the guy from the garage.
They talk for a while and I bite my lip, trying to work out whether this is enough. It helps, I’m sure, but…is it enough to be proof?
I don’t know.
I notice the two guys turn and walk toward another van - totally black, this time - and take a few photos of that as well, before I realize what they’re doing.
They’re leaving.
Damn it!
They’re driving out in this other van. I mean, I guess that should be obvious - I don’t know how long it would take for the original van to be painted and dry - but it puts me in a tough position.
Do I stay and wait to take photos of that specific van being painted…or do I follow them to wherever they’re going now?
I hesitate on the edge of it, but they’re obviously not waiting for me - and as they drive out, I get some hurried shots of the van being painted coming out the other side of the machine, before I finally sling the camera back into the other seat and start my car up again. I don’t know whether what I’ve got is enough…and there’s that anxious excitement propelling me forward. I want to know where they’re going. What they’re doing. Whether it will be even more incriminating than this.
I follow after them, trying to keep back and not make it obvious, and I hope I’ve succeeded. They don’t seem to have noticed me so far, at least, and as they take a turning back out of the city, my confidence increases - as does my anticipation.
We drive for another twenty minutes or so and darkness is starting to overtake twilight now. I hope that will help disguise me even more, but I can’t help that it also makes me a little more anxious, too. I don’t know what that is - some sort of conditioning that bad things happen in the dark - that child inside me that’s still a little bit afraid of the monster under the bed, maybe.
I have the brief thought that maybe I should turn around. It’s already getting late and adrenaline might be fueling me now, but it’s a long way back to Ashton tonight and this is a lot of driving.
I don’t turn back, though. The need to know what’s going on is riding too high in me.
It’s only when the road we’re on starts becoming more isolated that I start feeling more hesitant. The cars that have been around us seem to melt away and I’m far too aware that I can’t see any lights in the countryside around me.
What are they doing? Where are they going?
…Have they noticed me?
I chew on my lip as I try to work it out, my heart beating harder in my chest even though I’m pretty sure that I’m just scaring myself here. The chances that there’s actually something to—
Headlights flash from behind me, a car roaring down the road towards me and it makes me jump, panicking a little.
Okay. Okay, you’re not up for this.
I admit it to myself as the car races past, just a normal night-time speeding driver, nothing to worry about. I use the next turning to loop around and take the road back in the other direction. I have no idea where I am, but it’s just been this one road for a while. If I follow it back, I should get close enough to Klamath Falls that I can pick up the signs.
I feel immediately better the moment I’m heading in the other direction - there’s a part of me that’s disappointed, that thinks I should have been braver and wishes I could have found out where those guys were going, but—
Another set of headlights appears in my rear view mirror and I frown. This is a pretty flat, open road. I didn’t notice anyone coming along in the distance when I turned…
You probably just weren’t paying attention.
I squint at my mirror a little more, though, and on the other side of the road I can’t make out the headlights from the van I was following anymore. It can’t have—surely it hasn’t just turned around?
I try to make out details of the vehicle behind me, telling myself not to panic, but I can’t see anything beyond the bright lights in the darkness. A bulky shape, I’d guess, big enough that it could be…
I increase my speed. It’s an instinctive thing, I can’t help it. I know I’m probably just seeing things - there’s probably some dip in the road that the van went down into, and that hid this one from view before - but I suddenly want to get back somewhere where I can see something. Lights in the distance. Houses. Cars. Anything.
I put my foot down - and my stomach churns as the van behind me doesn’t get further away. If anything, it gets nearer.
It’s not. It can’t be…
My mind is racing as I push the little car forward even more, wishing stupidly I had the money and taste for a sports car. Something that could outmatch a van like that. This thing doesn’t have a chance. I can see the speedometer moving round, getting higher and higher as the engine yells and complains, but the van behind me still gets nearer. I start to panic.
Did they lead me here? Was this deliberate? Did they see me all along?
Oh god…
I push the car further and feel like I’m flying across the road, everything around me whizzing by, but that damned van still behind me. Heart in my throat, I do the only other thing I can think of right now.
I swipe at my cell phone, attached to the front of my car, and hit the button to call Liam. I have no idea what to do. No idea what’s going to happen, and I can’t deny…I’m terrified.
The ring tone vibrates through the car, coming out of my car speakers, each one inordinately slow as I wait…
Pick up. Pick up, pick up, pick up…
I get a small wave of guilt at calling him after he made it so clear that he couldn’t deal with this - after I went against everything he advised and ended up in exactly the situation he was worried about - but it’s completely overwhelmed by the fact I need him. I need his help, I need his advice, and…god help me, if all else fails…I need him to know what’s going on.
It rings off, going to voicemail, and I let out a string of curses like I haven’t since before my nieces were born and I had to start filtering my language. I hit redial immediately, praying he just couldn’t quite get there in time. It’s not that late. What else could he be doing?
I wait, my eyes flicking behind me ever
y few moments to the van, as my car protests at the speed and pace I’m going…aaand it hits voicemail again. I want to yell and scream, but I don’t, dread filling me as I think about what might happen now.
Can I get back to town quick enough? How long did it take to come out here? Can you even remember?
We’re going pretty damn fast, we have to be covering a fair amount of ground…
Headlights come from in front of me all of a sudden, almost blinding me and making me take my foot off the gas, dropping the speed dramatically as I realize they’re literally right in front of me.
Driving on the wrong side of the road.
Oh my god.
I brake - I can’t help it, instinct kicks in - and I realize I have the two vehicles coming towards me from opposite directions, pinning me into the middle…and then I really do scream. My body reacts before my brain does and I turn sharply to one side, spinning off the road and onto the coarse ground beside it. I thank god that I can do that and the road isn’t lined with bushes or ditches, even as I start bouncing along, dropping the speed more and more as the car bumps along the roughness of the road.
A quick glance to my rear view mirror tells me they’ve both done the same - a little behind, but okay, god, now I definitely know they’re after me. As if I was holding onto one last sliver of doubt. I have no idea what I’m doing now. No idea at all. I’m not even on a road. I smash the horn, in case there’s anyone around who could hear me, but it’s a last ditch effort and I can feel them catching up. They’re having trouble with the rough terrain too, and I feel like the van is dropping behind, but the other…oh my god that’s a monster of a truck. I see it better in the van’s lights and my stomach turns over.
Panic races through me - and I desperately call Liam again. I don’t expect him to pick up this time. I don’t expect him to somehow be able to save me. I just need him to know. I need to not die in a ditch in some random, unmarked grave near Klamath Falls with no one ever knowing what’s happened to me.
“Liam!” I cry, as soon as it goes to the expected voicemail. “It’s me - Kelsey—I—I’m—”
I swallow, my voice choking up for a moment, my brain freezing as I have no idea how to describe anything that’s going on. I try to focus on the facts, knowing my panic seeps through into my voice anyway, knowing tears are running down my face and I’m so god-damn terrified that I think my insides are about to seize up.
“I’m near Klamath Falls. That’s where the workmen went—I followed them—and—and—now they’re following me. They’re getting the van repainted. It was never Drainage Solutions Limited. I don’t know who they are or what they’re doing, but they’re not workmen. I—I—I’m sorry. I don’t think I’m going to make it. They’re behind me, and they’re catching up, and we’re off road and my car is probably going to give up and—and—you were right, though it’s stupid to say that now. And—and—I think I love you—and—oh god, I wasn’t going to say that—and it’s not fair, because now I’m going to die—and what a shit thing to leave you with—and I’m sorry—I just—I wanted you to know—I don’t know what’s going to happen, but—but I don’t want to die in a ditch somewhere without anyone knowing what’s happened and—”
Something hits the car. Hard.
The impact goes all the way through me and the car seems to go flying, everything around me turning around and around, my vision blurry from the tears and my stomach churning as I seem to get knocked from every angle, totally losing control. I’m screaming, but even that feels distant. When the car finally comes to a rough stop, it feels like my body is still moving. Everything is sideways and nothing makes sense, my vision blurs and everything hurts impossibly as I struggle to take a breath.
I’m still panicked, dimly aware I have to get up, to get out of here, that something bad is happening - something bad is about to happen - but I…can’t…move. I scrabble at the nonsensical metal around me, even though that doesn’t do anything and my head feels like it’s about to explode, my vision narrowing until everything is far away and it’s like looking through a tunnel.
Something opens to the side of me - on top of me - I’m so confused, and then all I can see is a large, burly body standing over me, a face with shifting, blurry features looking down.
“Hello, Kelsey.” The distorted, slow-sounding voice says.
I have a moment of alarm that he knows my name, before everything goes black.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Liam
I wake up groggily after stumbling into bed in a haze the night before.
I vaguely remember finishing the two beers from the fridge - and then going in search of the case that Mark brought around the other day, that I didn’t feel able to tell him not to leave here. I’d forgotten about that when I started that first drink. I think. Or I was fooling myself into thinking I had, anyway.
I run a hand over my face and groan as the age-old guilt comes back with a vengeance.
I can’t believe I did that.
What’s even worse…I’m not sure I can quite regret it, either. It did take the edge off my mind racing, stopped the worrying, the thinking…it’s so easy to remember what a relief that was…and that scares me.
I sit up and look around for water - which obviously my drunk self didn’t leave by my bed last night - when I finally see my phone blinking at me. I rub my eyes a couple of times and drag it over to me - then freeze as I see the missed calls from Kelsey.
Shit. When was that? What’s going on?
I go straight to the voicemail message she left - and as I listen to it, everything else stops. My aching head, my hazy confusion, my slow mind…it cuts right the way through that, and through me.
For one long moment I can’t do anything, pure panic and fear and emotion welling up in me at her words - the tone in her voice - what she said to me.
I love you.
Fuuuuuckkkk.
I don’t let myself think about that, jumping up in one movement with sudden adrenaline racing through my body. The fear is enough to cut straight through whatever hangover I might have and I dress in the thirty seconds I learned in the Marines, every instinct coming back to me. Denial screams through me at what she said. At how long ago it was…
Late last night. It’s now mid-morning. What the fuck did I think I was doing?!
I still can’t believe it. I can’t accept that something might have…that it’s somehow too late.
Fuck fuck fuck.
I sprint down the stairs, seeing Maya sitting in front of the television, fully dressed - and probably starving, too, I think guiltily.
“Sweetie…why didn’t you wake me?”
“You looked sleepy, Daddy.” She blinks up at me, and the shattered remains of my heart get torn apart all over again.
God damn it. I’m never touching another drop of alcohol. Never again. I’ve flirted a little bit with the risk all these years, thinking I had it under control, but if it leaves my child damn near abandoned for the morning and Kelsey—Kelsey—
“C’mon sweetie. I need to take you over to Mark and Jenny’s, okay?”
“But…what about breakfast?” She frowns at me as I pick her up, her eyes widening as I rush out the door.
“Listen, sweetie, Kelsey is in trouble. She needs my help. I need you to be very good for me and eat breakfast at Mark and Jenny’s, okay?” I say, just assuming they’ll be okay with that. Dropping my hungry daughter off mid-morning isn’t exactly the best way to make friends, but right now I can’t care about that, or what they might think of me.
“What’s wrong?”
“I…don’t know, exactly. But I need to go help her, okay?”
I can’t possibly tell Maya any of the details. I can’t even think about the details right now, not without fighting off the crushing feeling that this is far too late. That even if I knew exactly where she was - even if I’d left immediately - it would still be far too late.
Kalmath Falls. That’s fucking hours away!
> I try to calm down my panic as Maya tugs at my shirt.
“Did you say sorry and make up?” She asks, and my bruised, battered heart feels like it’s shriveling up in my chest.
“Not yet.” I say, my voice coming out a hoarse whisper. “Not yet, sweetie. But I will.”
I make it a promise - to her and myself. I can’t believe anything else.
I set her down in the truck and drive her over to a surprisingly accepting Jenny. Mark is at work, but Jenny doesn’t mind helping out - she gives me a narrow glance over, but she doesn’t say anything about whatever she thinks of my appearance. It’s only as I’m leaving that I belatedly hope Maya won’t say anything about the reason for my sudden urgency.
I can’t deal with the idea of Mark knowing about this. Not right now. That voicemail—
Fuck. Stop it.
I don’t know what the hell I can do right now, from here in Ashton, hours after she left it - but I do know the one place I can go to get answers, to get anything that might help, and find out just what happened last night.
Even if I have to beat it the hell out of him.
I charge into the Town Hall and run up to the Mayor’s office, his secretary looking up with wide eyes. I don’t even look at her - just rush straight past, barging open the door to his office—only to be confronted with an empty room.
I growl my annoyance, backing out to the now shocked woman standing looking at me, obviously outraged.
“Where is he?” I bite out. “The Mayor? I need to know. Right now.”
I know I’m being an asshole here - and I know the reason for it too. As if this sort of urgency can make up for the fucking hours I lost last night.
“He hasn’t come in this morning.” She says, her tone cool enough that I’m surprised she’s even telling me anything. “Not that I think I should be telling you anything—”