On the Wings of Love

by Alanna Lucas

  “Just the local B&B. I don’t want to be a bother.”

  “Natalia, it’s as clear as the nose on my face you are not well. A lot of things may have happened between you two, but you need help.” Grams passed the sleeping child to Rex. “Take him. I’m going to get some things and be right back.” Before anyone could protest, she scurried out the back door.

  Rex had held his nephew and nieces plenty of times, but this felt different, and entirely too personal. He studied the little boy’s features that seemed so like his own. Grams had a favorite picture of Rex as a toddler kissing the top of his sister’s head shortly after she was born, which was always on her nightstand. Without a doubt, Alec could be his twin.

  “I see she hasn’t changed a bit,” Natalia weakly laughed.

  “No, she hasn’t.” Rex eyed his ex-wife. “We need to discuss what comes next.”

  Chapter 14

  After Tessa left the bookstore, she headed up to the house and went straight to her room. But the normally tranquil space offered no comfort. She paced around, too anxious to sit still, as she pulled her phone from her back pocket and called her best friend.

  “He’s got a son,” she blurted out the moment Jillian answered the phone.

  “What? Who?”

  “Rex! He has a son. The book club was meeting, and everything was good and then his ex-wife showed up and she’s tall and pretty and stylish and she announced that they have a son.”

  “Whoa, slow down.”

  “Okay,” Tessa sniffled.

  “Did you know he had a son?”

  “I don’t think he even knew.”

  “You haven’t talked to Rex about this?”

  “No,” she said sheepishly. “It just happened.”

  “Tessa, you need to talk to him. Find out what’s going on before jumping to conclusions.”

  How could she not jump to conclusions? Her head hurt, reeling with the possibilities of what his ex-wife’s arrival could mean.

  “What am I going to do? The thought of being around children is still so painful…and if this child is his, it changes everything.”

  “Why? It doesn’t make things worse. It’s just not what you expected.”

  “If I knew he had a child, I would’ve never gotten involved with him in the first place.”

  “Maybe this happened for a reason.”

  Yeah, like perhaps she wasn’t meant to be with Rex after all and her happily ever after was just an illusion. “I don’t—”

  “You need to talk to him. I’m coming up on the next flight I can get out of L.A.”

  “Jillian, you don’t need…”

  “Don’t argue with me.” Her voice quavered through the phone. “You’re like a sister, and I can’t let you go through this alone.” She’d never heard Jillian this worked up over anything, except when she had an argument with her mom.

  “Thank you,” Tessa murmured.

  “Promise me though that you’ll talk to him before doing anything drastic.”

  The silence lingered between them like the miles that separated them. Tessa’s chest ached with too many emotions to name. “I promise.”

  “I’ll see you soon.”

  “See you soon,” she whispered as the call ended.

  Tessa turned on the gas fireplace and lit her favorite candles before trudging over to the window bench and plopping down on the soft thick cushions. She rested her head against the cool glass and closed her eyes. The soft pitter-patter of rain helped to distract her thoughts. The warmth from the fireplace pushed the chill of the evening from the room, inviting her to relax. The aroma of lavender soon filled the air, a soothing balm to her frayed nerves. Breathe, just breathe. She nestled farther into the voluptuous cushions.

  She didn’t know how much time had passed when Rex’s deep voice softly called to her, wrestling her from sleep. “Tessa?” His large hand traveled up her leg, resting on the swell of her hip. “Tessa darling, we need to talk.”

  His words struck to the very core of her body, sending a quiver down her spine. Tessa’s eyes flew open. Rex’s brows were drawn together in a tormented expression. He looked worn, uncertainty filling his blue eyes.

  “Are you okay?”

  “I don’t even know where to begin.” He inhaled deeply as he sat down next to her. Several agonizing seconds ticked by before he finally spoke. “The woman who arrived at the bookstore is my ex-wife, Natalia.”

  “I heard.” She swallowed hard, wanting to ask about the child, but not entirely sure she wanted to hear the answer. Ignorance was bliss after all. “And… the child?”

  Rex ran a trembling hand through his hair. “Natalia claims Alec is mine.”

  “Do you believe her?” Her words came out a mere whisper.

  “I don’t know what to believe.” He took her hands in his. “There’s more.” He sucked in a deep breath and slowly released it. “She has cancer.”

  A whole range of emotions ripped through Tessa’s body. Tears threatened the corners of her eyes. No matter how she felt, the thought of a child—any child—losing their mother tore at her heart. “Is it bad?”

  He nodded. “Yeah, it’s bad.”

  “Does… does she want you back?”

  Rex squeezed Tessa’s hands. “This changes nothing between us. I’m in love with you, not her.” He kissed the top of her hand.

  “Then, what’s going on?” she squeaked out.

  “Tessa,” he said her name on a long sigh. “I’m still trying to make sense of everything that has happened. This is not easy. It’s not every day that your ex-wife shows up, tells you she has cancer, that her odds aren’t good, and that the toddler she’s holding is yours, and…” his words trailed off. The silence grew between them as he shook his head, seemingly lost in his own struggles.

  “Rex?”

  “I’m sorry. It’s just… I have to know if Alec is mine. And if he is…”

  Tessa knew what he was about to say. “I understand. And Natalia?”

  He sucked in a deep breath. “Her surgery is later this week. She will need extensive chemo and radiation. In spite of everything, I can’t just abandon her.”

  “I wouldn’t expect anything less.” It was the truth. He was the most caring man she’d ever met. His place was with them. But she hated the tension rising between them, nonetheless.

  It was one thing to give her heart to him, but an entirely different situation for her to be with him and his child, combined with his ex. Tessa was still healing from her own loss. How was she to help Rex through this? And what happened if she got attached to the child and Natalia got better, then what? Would the ex run away again and take the child? What then? The questions kept slashing through Tessa’s mind, settling into a deep pain in her heart.

  The unspoken truth wedged between them, creating a distance that threatened to end what they had only recently discovered, but his son came first.

  “Where are they staying?”

  “At the B&B. Grams is with them now.”

  “What happens next?”

  “We’re going to Portland tomorrow morning to have a paternity test. We’ll be spending the night at Zane’s place.”

  Jealousy began to consume every inch of her body. “Oh,” was all she could whisper.

  He quickly clarified the situation, “Grams is coming with us.” Rex wiped away the tears she hadn’t realized had begun to creep down her cheek. “Tessa, you have nothing to worry about regarding Natalia.”

  She didn’t have the opportunity to voice her concern before the Monster Mash sang from his cellphone.

  “Bernie?”

  He glanced down at the screen, then offered an apologetic glance. “Yes.”

  “It’s okay, take it.”

  Rex’s gaze settled on her as he answered the phone. “I’m with Tessa. Can I call you back?” He hung up the phone, then slid it into his pocket. He cupped her chin tenderly in his warm hand. “None of this changes how I feel about you, about us.” He brushed a soft kiss
across her lips. “Don’t give up on us.”

  It had been a horrible night filled with nightmares and uncertainty, and the day did not promise to be much better. Tessa wished she could’ve fallen asleep, but every time she closed her eyes, images of Rex holding his son haunted her. She’d already been up for hours and, although her alarm would not go off for another two and half hours, now that she was up, she figured she’d better start to get the day over with. After a long, hot shower, Tessa headed downstairs. Bernie’s off-key singing and the sweet, hearty aroma of pancakes enticed her. Bernie’s homemade pancakes and a large cup of coffee were just the things she needed this morning. Well, that and some wise advice from her friend.

  Tessa had just taken in a breath—prepared to offer a good morning greeting to Bernie, when she came face to face with her nightmare. Sitting at the table, looking far too comfortable and at home was Natalia, feeding Alec. Even at a quick glance, the child looked like Rex, but the longer she gazed upon his features, the more uncanny the resemblance became.

  “Good morning, Tessa dearest.” There was an underlining tone of concern lacing each word.

  Choking on her words, she attempted to bring some normalcy to her voice. “Good morning.”

  “Natalia, this is Tessa. She owns the bookstore.”

  “Nice to meet you.” Although the words themselves were pleasant, Tessa couldn’t help but notice how Natalia studied her. It was incredibly unsettling. She felt naked and exposed.

  If she thought her nightmares were bad, this was far worse. Images of this incredibly beautiful woman and Rex together rushed to the forefront of her mind, strangling all other thoughts. The walls seemed to close in around her.

  Breathe, just breathe.

  “I should head over to the bookstore.” She swallowed hard. “There’s a ton of stuff to do before the sale next week.”

  She’d only took a few steps out of the kitchen when Bernie came scurrying up behind her. “Tessa.” She stopped and turned to face Bernie. “I know this is difficult, but—”

  “I just don’t know what to do or think, it’s just… overwhelming.”

  “I know, dearest.” Bernie brought her into a warm hug. “Try not to make too much of all this. Rex loves you and you love him. Think of how far you’ve already come. You will get through this.”

  Tessa nodded her head as a multitude of emotions pounded in her heart. One step at a time.

  “Morning, Grams,” Rex said as he entered the kitchen. He hoped to catch a moment alone with Tessa before he left with Natalia, Alec, and Grams for Portland, but instead was startled by the sight of his ex-wife making herself at home in his grandmother’s kitchen.

  “What are you doing here, Natalia?”

  “You don’t need to take that tone with her.” Grams scolded. “I offered to make pancakes for Alec.” My grandson.

  The unspoken words lingered in the air. How had things become this complicated in such a short amount of time? It would have been so easy for Rex to lose his temper. Sucking in his breath, he inhaled deeply.

  “I’m going upstairs to talk to Tessa. We will leave in half an hour.”

  “Tessa is down at the bookstore.”

  Rex glanced at his watch. It wasn’t even seven. “Isn’t it rather early?”

  “She said she had to get things ready for the upcoming sale.” Rex could tell that even his grandmother did not believe the words she’d just spoken.

  He started for the back door, but before leaving, he turned to Grams and Natalia. “Half hour.” He was in no mood for any delays.

  Rex rushed down to the bookstore. They had not ended on a good note last night and he was desperate to reassure Tessa. But the last thing he expected was for the back door to be locked. He couldn’t recall it ever being locked—not while anyone was present at least.

  Knocking firmly on the door, he waited. Several minutes passed before he heard the lock turn. The door slowly opened.

  Her red puffy eyes met his gaze. “Rex, I didn’t expect you. I was upstairs doing inventory.”

  Guilt streaked across his conscience. He went to reach for her, but she pulled away.

  “Don’t. I’m all dusty and dirty.” Her excuse was flimsy and laden with remorse.

  “Want to tell me what you’re thinking?” He said as he stepped into the kitchen. The smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the air. He wanted nothing more than to sit at the table, have a cup with Tessa, and talk about their future, but her cool gaze begged him to be cautious. He could clearly see she was confused and hurting.

  “No,” she said on a long sigh. “I need to focus on my bookstore.”

  Before she could turn away from him, Rex grabbed her hand, pulling her into the circle of his arms. It pained him that she would not talk to him. Instinct told him to give her time, but his heart demanded more.

  “I’m not going to let you retreat into your shell and shut me out.” His lips were so close to hers and yet so far away.

  She pulled out of his embrace. “You have a different focus now. You have a son. A son who is going to need you.” Tears streamed down her face. “There’s just too much… I need time—”

  He cupped her cheek and looked into her pear green eyes. “I will give you time, but never, never doubt how much you mean to me and how much I love you. We will get through this… together.”

  Rex brushed a soft kiss across her lips. When he met with no resistance, he deepened the kiss, branding her as his.

  “Tessa—”

  “Please don’t,” she said in a mere whisper. “I think it would be best if you go.”

  Confusion and anger rippled through his veins. “I’m not going to leave you. I will not lose you.”

  She pulled away. “Don’t you understand? It’s not just about us anymore. There’s so much more at stake and I just…”

  “What?”

  Tessa sucked in her breath as she looked away. “Nothing.”

  He turned her cheek, so she was facing him again. “Talk to me.”

  “This has brought back all the memories.” Her voice was fragile and shaking. “I’ve lost so much, and I can’t go through it again. I can’t get attached and then have every hope and dream snatched from me. I’m not strong enough.”

  “You are stronger than you realize.”

  She stared, wordlessly.

  The clock chimed seven times. They needed to start the journey to Portland if they were going to make their first appointment by nine am. “Tessa—” Her name still lingered on his lips when she turned and ran up the stairs. He was about to follow when Grams scurried in.

  “Is she all right?”

  “No, and I don’t know what to do.”

  The despair in his voice must have startled Grams. “Oh, dear boy, don’t lose hope. You gave her time in the beginning, and you need to give her time now to adjust to this, because you also need time to accustom yourself to being a father. She loves you so much. She’ll come around.”

  Things had gone from complicated to an utter disaster. I hope so.

  Chapter 15

  In a vain attempt to forget her worries, Tessa buried herself in work. However, all she could think about the entire morning was Rex and his son. By the time the bookstore opened several hours later, the inventory was completed, the display case was clean, and the coffee pot was empty—which may have accounted for some of Tessa’s jitters.

  Before she could tackle the next task on her list, Dorothy strolled into the shop. “Morning Tessa, ready to get started on the inventory?”

  “It’s done.”

  “You completed the inventory? When?”

  “This morning,” she said with some guilt, why she wasn’t sure. Possibly because she had used it as an excuse to avoid Rex, avoid going back up to the house, avoid what she was feeling.

  Dorothy eyed her with concern. “If you want to talk, I’m a good listener.”

  “Thank you.” Tessa could feel the tears burning the corners of her eyes.

  “I kn
ow this is your shop, and I don’t want it to sound like I’m trying to run things, but if you need to take some time for yourself, I don’t mind holding down the fort.”

  “I would never think you were trying to run things. You’ve been amazing.” She went up to Dorothy and gave her a huge hug. She felt so loved, so cared for by her new friends. “Thank you. I think I will take some time off this morning. I have some errands to run and a package to pick up from the post office.”

  “Take your time.”

  Tessa dashed up to the main house, thankful everyone had already left, packed some clothes and other essentials before heading to Coffee on the Docks. Hopefully, the morning coffee rush would have dissipated by the time she got there. The last thing she needed was to run into a bunch of busybodies.

  Tessa had barely set foot in the coffee shop when Phoebe rushed out from behind the counter and embraced her.

  “How are you holding up?”

  “I’m okay. Can I stay with you for a few days?” She wasn’t giving up on her and Rex, she just needed some space—away from children and an ex-wife—to absorb all that had happened. In the past months, Tessa had come to realize just how much this quaint seaside town has come to mean to her. She did not want to leave Devlin or run away from her problems.

  “Of course. I’m…” The beeping of the oven timer interrupted her. “Hang on.” Phoebe disappeared to the back for a couple of minutes before returning to her post behind the counter, the scent of chocolate chip muffins following on her heels. “As I was saying, I’m taking a few days off. I think hanging with the girls will do you some good.”

  “Hanging with the girls? You didn’t tell me you rented out one of your spare rooms.”

  Laughing, she clarified. “Jillian texted me after she spoke with you last night.”

  “I didn’t even think of where she would stay.” Embarrassment flooded Tessa. Under normal circumstances, she would’ve asked Bernie if it was okay for Jillian to stay with them, but the circumstances were far from normal.