And Then You Die

by Iris Johansen

  “Later. I'm not leaving her.”

  “What about the blood test?”

  “We think it's positive. I'm calling Ed Katz to verify the results on the new sample.”

  “Positive?” Ramsey swore softly. “And you still let her come here? Are you nuts?”

  “Probably.” He changed the subject. “Has Yael checked in?”

  “Not since yesterday, but he's on his way here. When are you taking her to the safe house?”

  “Why don't you worry about finding that counterfeiting center and lab in Iowa and let me worry about Bess?”

  “Because you're not worrying enough about her. You're going to get her killed and then where will we be if Esteban moves ahead with––”

  “I'll call you back.” Kaldak hung up the phone. He didn't need Ramsey to tell him how reckless he was acting. He dialed Ed Katz in Atlanta.

  “It's a definite.” Ed's excited words tumbled over one another. “We can work with it. But we need more, much more.”

  “What do you want me to do? Drain her veins?”

  “No, no, of course not. But it wouldn't hurt to get me another sample right away.”

  “I'll get it when I can.”

  “Right away.”

  “She just saw her sister dead in a coffin.”

  “Oh.” Ed paused. “Too bad. But maybe you could explain to her how important it is to––”

  “Good-bye, Ed.”

  “Wait. She's upset?”

  “Of course she's upset.”

  “Don't give her a sedative. It would compromise the results of the next batch that you––”

  “I'll give her whatever she needs. If I have to knock her out for the next twenty-four hours, I'll do it.”

  “You don't need to get testy. It's your ball game. Just send me something as soon as you can.”

  Kaldak slid the phone back into his pocket.

  It's your ball game.

  Yes, it was his game and he was being permitted to call the shots. A dubious honor given him only because nobody else wanted to stick his neck out. Too many things could go wrong. Hell, too many things had already gone wrong. So far only one thing in the entire unholy mess had gone right, Bess's immunity factor.

  So he was supposed to treat Bess as if she were a lab animal. To hell with what she felt or thought. To hell with individual freedom, think of the public good. Use her.

  It made him sick. It was a nightmare that had gone on too long.

  He was afraid that he couldn't do it any longer.

  And he was more afraid that he could.

  “She took the bait?” Esteban felt a rush of pleasure.

  “She's there?”

  “She collapsed at the funeral home,” Marco De Salmo said. “She's at her apartment now. Kaldak is with her.”

  “Any way of getting to her?”

  “Security is tight, real tight. I didn't have a chance at the funeral home.”

  “But you've been hired to get around it, Marco,” Esteban said softly. “I'm sure you'll be successful. We don't have much time. They'll whisk her away and hide her as soon as they can. I can't tell you how displeased I'd be if that happened after I've gone to all this trouble.”

  “I've bugged the phone. And I'm watching the apartment. We won't lose her again.”

  “I hope not. Every minute she's alive is a dangerous minute. For you as well as for her.”

  There was a silence. “I'll find a way.”

  “I have every confidence.” He hung up the phone. He did have a certain amount of confidence in De Salmo. He'd found him very efficient if a little lacking in imagination. Imagination was a great asset in an assassin. Kaldak had imagination, and it was one of his most valuable qualities.

  “It's a call from Mr. Morrisey on your portable phone.” Perez was standing in the doorway. “You said you'd take his calls anytime.”

  Morrisey. Eagerness shot through Esteban as he reached for the phone. Of course he wanted to talk to him. He'd been waiting on pins and needles for weeks. It had taken Morrisey too long already to locate the right man. “You've found him?”

  “Cody Jeffers. Twenty-one. A loner. Starstruck. Brags a lot. He's a minor driver in the demolition derby here. He's been hanging around the track for the past couple of weeks and bothering the headliners. He came in third and fourth in a couple of minor derbies, but he gambles the prize money away as fast as he gets it. Sound like the man you want?”

  Excitement was soaring through Esteban. “Exactly.”

  “Do you want me to approach him for you?”

  “No, I'll do it myself.” This part of his plan was too crucial to be handled by underlings. Jeffers was to be the linchpin and must be absolutely right. “Where is he?”

  “Here in Cheyenne, Wyoming. Majestic Hotel. A fleabag near the track.”

  “Meet me at the airport. I'll be there tomorrow morning. Perez will call and let you know the flight number.”

  He hung up the phone and leaned back in his chair. The Grady woman would soon be dead and the linchpin had been found.

  Things were moving forward very satisfactorily.

  Light was streaming through the lace curtains at the window. Bess had always loved that misty, patterned look. She'd bought the lace in Amsterdam, framed it with striped wool draperies, and made sure the curtains hung straight, with no fussy flounces. She'd bought a length for Emily too, and Emily had ordered curtains made for Julie's room. Emily had laughed and said that she would have never dreamed Bess liked lace, that it didn't suit her personality at––

  Emily.

  Pain tore through Bess and she closed her eyes tightly, blocking out the thought of her sister.

  “Don't go back to sleep.”

  Her eyes opened, and she saw Kaldak sitting beside the bed.

  “You've been asleep for ten hours,” he said quietly. “You need to eat now.”

  She shook her head.

  “Yes.” He stood up. “I'll go fix you soup and a sandwich.”

  “I'm not hungry.”

  “You have to eat anyway. Go take a shower and dress.” He left the room.

  He was back to being cool and decisive, she realized. Yet last night he had held her in his arms for hours and rocked her and agonized with her as if Emily had been his sister too.

  Emily.

  “Get up,” he called from the kitchen.

  To hell with him. She didn't want to get up. She wanted to go back to sleep and forget the sight of Emily in that coffin. Oh, Jesus.

  He returned, lifted her to her feet, and pushed her gently toward the bathroom. “I'll give you ten minutes. If you're not out of the shower, I'll come in and finish the job.”

  She wanted to hit him.

  “Life goes on, Bess. You don't heal lying in bed. You heal doing something about it.”

  “Stop preaching to me. You don't know how––”

  He was gone.

  She slammed the bathroom door and leaned against it. She was crying again. “Dammit,” she whispered. “Damn you, Kaldak.”

  And damn Esteban, who had killed Emily and had her thrown in a hole in the ground as if she were nothing. Monster. Crawling out from under the rock and tearing, hurting––

  “Five minutes, Bess.”

  Why wouldn't he stop nagging her? she thought as she stripped off her clothes. He was just like Emily and the way––

  Was everything going to remind her of Emily? Kaldak wasn't like Emily. No one was like her.

  She turned on the shower and stepped beneath the spray.

  Emily had been bright and loyal and loving. And that monster had killed her.

  Show them the monsters.

  But they all knew who the monster was, and Emily had still died. The monster was walking around, breathing air, eating food, laughing and talking, and Emily was dead.

  And Bess was standing there weeping and wailing because “they” had done nothing. It was always “they.” They had done nothing at Tenajo. They had done nothing at Danza
r either.

  She had done nothing.

  Emily was dead and she was doing nothing.

  “Bess?”

  Kaldak was standing outside the shower stall. She could see his large frame through the mist on the glass.

  “Go away, Kaldak.”

  “Come out, your lunch is ready.”

  “Go away.”

  “You've been in there long enough.” He started to slide the shower door open.

  “Get out.” She slammed the shower door shut. “I'll come out when I'm good and ready. Just leave me alone right now.”

  He stood there, startled at the fury in her voice.

  She was startled too. She hadn't realized how fast and high her anger had soared. Her fists were clenched so hard, her fingernails were digging into her palms. Wave after wave of anger and hate washed over her.

  Esteban.

  “Your robe's on the hook on the door.” The door shut and she was alone.

  No, not alone.

  The memory of Emily as she had seen her in the funeral home remained with her. Would she ever see her sister any other way? Would every memory of the past be burned away but that one?

  Push it aside, block it. She would only cry again, and that weakened her. She had to think and plan. She couldn't be weak now. She had to be as strong as Emily would have been in her place.

  Because, at last, she'd learned that it did no good to just show the monsters.

  You had to kill them.

  She didn't come out of the bathroom for almost an hour.

  Kaldak looked up when she came into the kitchen. “Your soup's cold.” He rose to his feet and picked up the bowl. “I'll put it in the microwave for a minute.”

  “You're feeding me in the kitchen?” She gave him a ghost of a smile. “Your mother wouldn't approve.”

  “She understood emergencies. Sit down.”

  “Okay.” She sat at the table and said haltingly, “I'm sorry . . . I yelled . . . at you. You were only doing what you thought best.”

  “No problem.”

  “And you were very kind to me last night. Thank you.”

  “For God's sake, I don't want you to thank me.” His gaze raked her face. “Are you okay?”

  No, she wasn't okay. Emily was dead and Esteban was not. “I'm fine.”

  “The hell you are. You're pale as a sheet and look like you're holding on by a hair.”

  “I'm fine,” she repeated.

  “I called Dr. Kenwood this morning. Josie's doing well.”

  “Does he know when they're going to operate?”

  “He won't commit yet.” He set the soup down in front of her. “He said she needs to build more blood.”

  Blood Esteban had taken from her.

  “Has anyone notified Tom and Julie about Emily?”

  “Not yet. They can't be reached. They're still in Canada.”

  “I don't want you to try to find them. I don't want them to know.”

  “Why?”

  “They'd come down here and it would be dangerous for them. You said they might be targets.”

  He nodded. “We'll continue to keep a watch on the ranger station and their house.”

  “I don't want them to see Emily . . . the way I did.” She had to stop a minute to steady her voice. “Tom and Julie wouldn't believe she's dead any more than I did. They'd open the casket and see–– I can't let them do that. I want her to be buried with dignity and respect. I want you to arrange a quiet funeral for tomorrow. When we tell them, I need to be able to show Julie that her mother is in a place that––”

  “You're not the next of kin. Tom Corelli has the right to make that decision, Bess.”

  “I'm taking the right.” She picked up the spoon. Her hand was shaking only a little. “You can fix it. You're the CIA. If you can forge papers and kill people, you can do this. I won't let Tom and Julie see Emily like that. I want them to remember her as she was before Esteban–– Do it, Kaldak.”

  He nodded slowly. “I'll make the arrangements. But the burial should be done today. The sooner we get out of here, the better.”

  “Tomorrow.” She would be ready tomorrow. She wasn't strong enough yet. She forced herself to start eating the soup. Eat the soup, the sandwich. Try to sleep tonight. Get strong. “Tomorrow, Kaldak.”

  “I don't like–– Okay.” He sat watching her eat. “But now I have a favor to ask you. Ed says he can work with the sample we gave him, but he needs more.”

  Blood. She had almost forgotten. She shouldn't forget. It had to be entered into the equation. “Then take it.”

  “I can wait awhile.”

  “Take it.”

  He got up from the table and disappeared into the living room. He came back with the black leather kit he had used in the parking lot in Atlanta. When the needle entered her arm, she barely felt it. “You're very good at that.”

  “Stay still.” His expression was intent as he drew the blood. “There.” He put a Band-Aid on her arm. “I'll be right back. I have to get these tubes packed in ice and ready to go. They need to reach Ed by tonight. His team is working around the clock.”

  “Then there is a big hurry. You said you could wait.”

  “You were out for a long time.” He smiled crookedly. “And I was trying to be humane. Couldn't you tell?”

  “Yes.” He had been kind. He had held her and tried to keep away the darkness. For a while he had done it, but now it was back and must be dealt with. “I could tell.”

  He was gone again, to get the blood ready for the CDC. It didn't seem right she was immune to the disease and Emily had died. Emily was a doctor and had a family. Did God just randomly choose?

  She stood up and moved toward the window overlooking the rooftops and wrought-iron balconies of the French Quarter. She had always loved this city. When Emily had come down to visit, she had disliked it and tried to convince Bess to get an apartment in Detroit. New Orleans was too whimsical for practical Emily.

  “I've called Ramsey and told him to send a courier for the package,” Kaldak said when he came back into the kitchen. “I'll answer the door when we hear the bell.”

  “Are you afraid someone's going to show up with a machine gun and blow me away?” she asked wearily.

  “No, not a machine gun. There are quieter and more competent ways.” He set the package on the chest by the door. “And I doubt if they'll come to the front door. They'll wait until you go out.”

  She looked back out at the window. “You think they're waiting?”

  “Yes, I told you they would be. That's what this is all about.”

  She didn't take her gaze away from the Quarter. “It's all about the blood, isn't it? You want the blood and Esteban wants me dead before I give you enough to spoil his neat little plan.”

  “Yes.”

  “How much is enough, Kaldak?”

  “We don't know.”

  “Then I seem to be a very valuable asset.”

  Kaldak was silent, watching her.

  “Do you think Esteban is here?”

  “I doubt it. He wouldn't risk it. But he's sent someone.”

  “I'm sure that was a disappointment to him. I remember his face in the hospital when he told me Emily was dead. Why did he lie to me about Emily being in the morgue?”

  “He wanted to hurt you. You might not have believed him if he'd told you he'd buried her in the hills. You'd have thought he was lying and that Emily had gotten away from him.”

  “I did think that when we found Rico. I hoped she had––” Even that hope was painful to remember. “How did Ramsey know she'd been buried in the hills?”

  “Yael.”

  She turned to look at him. “Yael?”

  “I told him to look for a grave.”

  She stiffened. “What?”

  “I called him back that day on the aircraft carrier and told him to look for a grave.”

  “You thought she was dead even then?” she whispered.

  “I hoped she wasn't. I prayed
she wasn't. But I knew there was a good possibility.”

  “Why?”

  “She wasn't brought to the hospital with Josie. From what you told me about your sister, I didn't think she would allow herself to be separated from the baby.” He paused. “If she was alive.”

  Bess had thought the same thing, but she hadn't allowed herself to accept it. “There was a chance she was still alive. There was a chance.”

  “But a greater one that she was dead.” His lips lifted in a faint smile. “My analytical mind. I had to play the odds. I told Yael while he was searching to also be on the lookout for a shallow grave.”

  “And he found it. When?”

  “Three days ago. He spotted a suspect site in the foothills about ten miles from Tenajo. He verified and was on his way back to report to me, when Esteban's men came and began to exhume.”

  “You mean dig her up,” she said bitterly. Exhume. Such a smooth, clean word for an ugly violation.

  He nodded.

  “You didn't tell me. You let me hope.”

  “There was a chance I was wrong. And would you have believed me if I'd told you Emily was probably dead?”

  No, she wouldn't have believed him. She hadn't let herself believe it until she had actually seen Emily's body.

  Veer away. Don't think of that moment. Keep controlled and steady. “I'm . . . tired. I'm going back to my bedroom. Let me know when you've made arrangements for Emily's funeral.”

  “If you feel up to it, you might start packing. We should leave immediately after the funeral.”

  She went into her bedroom and shut the door, closing him out. She had started to shake, but she didn't think he had seen. She had shown him too much weakness already and she couldn't afford to have him perceive her as anything but strong and decisive.

  She drew a deep, steadying breath. That was better. Just a little more time and she would be fine.

  She was so finely balanced, Kaldak had expected her to shatter at any moment.

  It might be better if she had. That careful control could be more dangerous than the wild despair of last night. Her manner today was not what he had expected. He was usually able to read her, but he hadn't known what she was thinking today.

  That was not going to be a problem though. He had an idea she would make her thoughts and needs known soon enough.