I glare at him while he cackles away, leaping back a safe distance.
“Is he giving you any trouble?” Nate’s voice sounds from where Tanner was just standing.
“No, he just likes the sound of his own voice.”
Nate snickers and punches Tanner in the arm.
“Tell me something I don’t know.” He grins at Tanner as he starts walking the length of the aisle, giving us a minute alone. “I’m sorry about this morning. I wasn’t trying to overwhelm you.”
But you did.
“I don’t like people in my space, Olson.”
“I know,” he replies gently. “But like Bubba said, it won’t be like this forever. We’ll get him, that I promise you.”
Maybe.
Or maybe Charlie will get all of us.
“I’m trying to survive as long as I can. I’m not used to relying on other people. I can’t depend on anyone because every time I have, I’ve been burned, literally, in the end.”
“If you think he’s getting out of this alive, I’ll save you the agony, Aria. If my gun is pointed in his direction, I’m shooting to kill. I can sleep perfectly fine at night knowing I exterminated someone like him from the Earth.”
I could too.
“And…you can depend on us. I can’t say too much. But we know what we’re doing. Charlie isn’t the only person we’ve dealt with.”
His words have deeper meaning, and yet, I hang on every word. Who else has he had to kill?
“Well, enjoy the rest of your day. Tanner will be around probably until Bubba gets back.”
Oh great. And then I have the rest of the evening to ignore Derek.
After my two lessons, Chris appears in the barn and helps me set up evening feed. He’s unusually quiet. He ignores Tanner and when Annie gets to the barn, she ignores him too. Between the three of us, we could run this whole place without any input from Daddy.
Speaking of, he shows up as we’re loading up the hay in the second golf cart. He hasn’t even looked in my direction, but he chats with Tanner in low tones so we can’t hear him. But damn it, I’d love to know what he thinks about all this.
They finish up their conversation and Daddy approaches me quietly, not showing any signs of anger like he has the last couple of weeks.
“Let’s take a walk.”
I raise my eyebrows.
“A walk?”
“That’s what I said. Move it.”
I glance back at Annie, and she shrugs.
What could he possibly want?
We walk in silence out of the barn and to the farthest pasture, about a mile away from the barns. We hit a patch of woods and I freeze. My mind flits to that night where Charlie dragged me through the woods with nothing but the flashlight on his phone and pushed me into his former stepmother’s grave. I smell her decaying flesh. I feel the tiny legs of beetles crawling all over me.
I can’t walk through there.
My body won’t let me.
Daddy stops and waits, watching me like I’m a crazy person.
“When you were three, you ran away from home because Annie got to go to school and you couldn’t yet.”
My father isn’t a sentimental person. He’s one of those people who throws children’s artwork away simply because it’s cluttering up a space. He hates reminiscing.
I’m not sure where he’s going with this. And I know I’m not going into those woods.
“You waited until your mother wasn’t watching and you made a break for it. It didn’t take long for your mother to call in the cavalry and before I knew it, the whole town skipped work to come and help us find you.”
Oh, I bet he loved that.
“Your favorite place in the whole world was the barn. I was certain I’d find you there, but even then, you were unpredictable. You were always an observer. And you knew how to exploit that.”
Ugh.
“I saddled up and started looking for you around here. About an hour and a half tearing the place apart, I had a hunch you’d be hiding in the woods. I’m not sure why, because you were always afraid to come over here. In my gut, I knew I’d find you. And sure enough, you found Chris and Jay’s treehouse and were coloring on the floorboards with crayons.”
Why don’t I remember this? I know I avoided this patch of woods, but I don’t ever remember running away from home.
“You were probably furious with me.”
He smirks.
“I think I was more impressed a three year old could bring a whole town to its knees just because she wasn’t allowed to go to school.”
He takes a step into the woods and beckons me to follow him, but I can’t. It’s broad daylight. The sun will shine through the trees and my father will be with me. But doesn’t take away the flashes of Charlie’s stepmother’s rotting corpse, or the awful smell I had to deal with for hours on end.
“I’m your father, Aria. I’m not going to hurt you. I want to show you something, and then we can come right out.”
My body shakes as I take a timid step forward.
There are no bodies here.
Charlie isn’t here.
My father isn’t going to leave me here.
“I can’t,” I whimper. “I’m sorry, Daddy, but I can’t go in there.”
“Because of the grave?”
My head snaps up, and my wild gaze locks on his. How does he know about that? I shouldn’t be surprised. When it comes to my father, he has a way of knowing everything.
I nod, quietly. He ponders this a moment and holds out his hand for me to grab onto. I reluctantly reach for it and gasp when he squeezes my hand tight and leads me forward.
The sunlight filters through the trees, and when we step under the canopy of shade, the heat of the day cools a few degrees. It’s an overgrown mess of ivy-cover trees, and giant, moss covered rocks.
I can’t imagine coming here on my own as a toddler. What could this place offer me, anyway?
Soon enough, the treehouse comes into view, and we climb up. Like he said, faded crayon drawings cover the floorboards. My name is sloppily written, and the scribbles cover every inch of wood.
“I asked why you chose this place, and do you remember what you said?” When I shake my head, he smiles. Like a real, genuine, face lit up smile. “You said you didn’t know.”
A watery laugh escapes me. That sounds like me.
“But we colored as you told me about what you were drawing. You told me you wanted to go to school, and it wasn’t fair the other kids got to go and you couldn’t. You were mad at your mother for refusing to put you in day care…You always had this unbridled passion to learn. Whether it was horses or tending to the crop…even cooking. You loved to learn.”
What does this have to do with anything? And why did he have to drag me all the way out here to show me this?
“When you told us you were accepted to Northwestern, I asked you why you wanted to go there. Do you remember what your reply was?”
“I don’t, but if I had to come up with a guess, it was probably because I wanted to get away and forge my own path.”
He grins and shakes his head.
“You said you didn’t know.”
I groan.
“I had an idea of why I wanted to,” I reply sheepishly. I put a lot of research into going there.
“There’s something I’ve learned about you, Peanut, and that’s you don’t take any shit from anyone, even when you don’t know what you’re doing.” He leans against the wall of the treehouse and smiles. “It’s something I’ve always admired about you.”
I scoff. “Don’t bullshit a bullshitter, Daddy. It’s the one thing you hate about me.”
He considers this a moment. “There’s nothing I hate about you, Aria Louise. Some of the things you do certainly piss me off more than anything, but I could never hate you.”
“Even when I almost killed mom coming out?”
He presses his lips in a hard line and scowls at me.
“I’ve ne
ver hated you. And it wasn’t your fault you came early.”
I scoff and lean my head back.
“You know, ever since I could remember, I didn’t care about impressing everyone. That’s why when the Hunts were making me out to be a dirty slut or the Parkers sabotaging my equipment when it was my turn to run at the rodeo, I never said anything. I didn’t care. I didn’t give a rat’s ass what they thought about me. But for some odd reason, you’re the only one I care about impressing.”
His eyes narrow.
“Chris was always the golden boy. He can’t do any wrong and he was the one who was going to inherit the place. Then there was Annie who is so fucking bubbly and quick witted. She always knew how to charm people and get everyone on her side. And then there was me.”
“There’s no point in comparing—”
“There is, Daddy.” A poisonous laugh escapes me. “From the moment I was born, I was a fuck up. I came too early and almost killed Momma in the process. I ran away from home because you guys refused to put me in a day care. In school, I wasn’t charming like Chris or Annie, which made everyone pick on me because I was quiet and weird.” The tears fill my eyes. This hasn’t bothered me like this before. “Chris and Annie went to college an hour away from home, and they came right back. I went to college four states away and had an inappropriate relationship with my boss. Who later manipulated me into moving in with him and beat me within an inch of my life whenever he saw fit. And now? I’m pregnant.”
I sob into my hands as my father watches me uncomfortably.
“My options, suck. I don’t think I could kill something that lives inside of me. And I can’t give it up to some family we don’t know. That wouldn’t be fair. And it wouldn’t matter what I chose because people judge me anyway. Hell, you judge me for keeping it.”
“Aria, I don’t judge you.”
“Yes you do. I’m not perfect like Chris and Annie. I can’t charm the town like they can. I’m an embarrassment. It’s the whole reason I’ve covered up and wore baggy clothes to hide the baby bump I find no point in hiding anymore. I’m tired, Daddy. I’m tired of being the one who makes one bad move after the other. It doesn’t matter how much I try, or try to think what you would do, because I always choose wrong.”
My sobs take over me, now. I wish I was closer to town so I could bother Dr. Nelson, because I’m sure this whole meltdown would buy her a nice long vacation in Hawaii.
“I was upset when you told me you were going to keep the baby,” he admits softly. “But it was mostly because I was scared you’d go back to him.”
Ha! That would be the day.
“I’ve made plenty of mistakes, Peanut. A lot of them. Mistakes your mother has helped me cover up and will take to her grave. My biggest mistake and regret, is not giving you enough credit. You found a way to get out, and you did it by yourself.”
Because that’s who I’ve relied on.
“I’m sorry for being hard on you. Honestly. Your mother tells me I have a knack for pushing people away. I’d like to say I could change, but…”
He won’t.
“Anyway, your brother and sister don’t want to inherit the farm.”
Shocker.
“So, now I’m asking you. When I die, would you like to take over Sage Creek Acres?”
“This feels like a bribe.”
He chuckles. “I’m afraid I wouldn’t be giving you much in return. This is a beast to run. If I didn’t have the three of you, I probably would’ve sold a long time ago. It’s been in the family a long time…I don’t necessarily want to give it to some schmuck off the street. I’d rather it went to somebody in the family.”
“I just got into a partnership with Jo. I don’t think I’ll have the time to do what you do.”
“But you and Derek would—”
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!
“There’s no me and Derek, dad. How did you even know about that?”
He smirks.
Derek has a big mouth.
“I can’t believe he told you,” I murmur, the rage boiling in my blood.
“He didn’t tell me. I saw you walking out of his house way too fucking early a few days ago.”
Oh, god!
“This isn’t happening. Please do not breathe a word of this to Momma. It was a one time—” two time “—thing. It won’t ever happen again, and I don’t want to talk about this with you.”
He shrugs.
“You’ve done worse.”
32
DEREK
Quitting smoking is the pits, but Logan told me it would look better in front of a judge if I was making the effort. But after the last few days, I need a break. I need a moment of nicotine corrupting my insides.
The boys are staying in Aria’s house so they can make the switching out easier. Tanner is spending the night on Annie’s couch since it’s his night to keep watch. I have Zoey for the weekend, and she’s tucked away, sleeping.
The raven haired beauty across the way is in my every waking thought. I’m not sure whether I’m disappointed or impressed she still hasn’t trusted me and hasn’t come back over again.
My heart leaps when her front door opens, and she notices me and starts this way. She’s light on her feet, almost like she’s a dancer. Her small baby bump gets bigger by the day, now looking like she’s pregnant.
“Dr. Hawthorn,” she greets with a teasing smile.
“Aria,” I greet back, scooting over so she can sit with me. I quickly put out the cigarette and push the table with the ash tray with my foot so she doesn’t have to breathe it in. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
She shrugs nonchalant and rests her head on my shoulder.
“Couldn’t sleep.”
“What’s on your mind, Ace?”
“Everything.” Her voice is small.
“Wanna talk about it?”
“Charlie’s been contacting me. I accidentally answered a few weeks ago.”
My muscles go rigid. Why didn’t she say anything?
“Did you tell Nate?”
She shakes her head and sighs. “No, I didn’t. I was afraid he’d take my phone again.”
Going without a lifeline for so long is understandable. Once you get it back, you don’t take it for granted.
“I’ll have Tanner pull the phone records. What did he say when you answered?”
“Nothing of substance. He wanted me to acknowledge him, and I threatened to turn it over to the FBI and he said he was counting on it. I hung up after that. I didn’t want to hear anymore.”
Regardless, letting us know ahead of time puts us two steps closer to figuring out what he’s planning.
“My dad asked if I wanted to inherit the farm. He insinuated you and I could run it with no problems.”
I sit up stock straight.
“What?”
“He apparently saw me doing the walk of shame the other night.”
And he hasn’t killed me yet?
“What’d you say?”
“I turned him down. When the time comes, we’ll figure it out. I’ll probably quit Jo’s place and take this over since I already know Chris and Annie want nothing to do with it.”
“But they help out every day…”
She snickers. “I know. But I don’t think they want the full responsibility falling to them.” She sighs and not so subtly sniffs me, turning her nose up when she smells the smoke on my clothes.
“And what about you?” I ask.
“I figure both Chris and Annie are going to have their own families one day. Jay will too. I don’t have any romantic entanglements in my future. It makes sense.”
My heart from sinks into the pit of my stomach with an audible and painstaking ‘thud.’
I’m falling for her, and she hasn’t even told me her middle name. I’ll make Tanner tell me. But I’m desperate to get off the subject. I want happy times with her while I can get them, especially when it feels like a war is coming my way.
&nb
sp; “If you didn’t attend school for English, what would you have done, Ace?”
Her smile is dazzling. The way her eyes crinkle when her smile reaches her eyes is sexy. And I’m not even mad she’s leaning on me because I could smell her hair all day.
“I don’t know.” That makes her giggle. “I’ve heard it isn’t wise to dwell on the ‘what-if’s.’ So…honestly, I don’t know.”
I can respect that. Asking what-if is a dangerous game. It takes out of the now. It takes you away from what you have around you.
What if I didn’t marry Emily?
Simple. Then I wouldn’t have Zoey.
I have zero regrets with how my life turned out.
“If you didn’t have Zoey, would you have stayed in the Navy?”
Yes.
“Probably. I was used to it, and it gave me the perfect avenue to travel the world.”
“Sometimes I wonder what would’ve happened if I didn’t go to Chicago for school. When I was trapped with Charlie, I used to wonder what my life would’ve been like had I followed Chris and Annie to the college they went to. Would I have taken over the farm already? Would I have been stuck in a loveless marriage with Chadwick Hilton?”
God, I hope not. He’s a tool.
“Maybe our paths would’ve crossed sooner.”
“Maybe. But I doubt you would’ve looked my way.”
“I don’t think so. You’re stunning. I definitely would’ve looked.”
She rolls her eyes. “Thank you for saying that, but I’m going to agree to disagree. I don’t consider myself a person with a ton of strength and courage. Everyone around me tells me that’s exactly who I am. I’ll admit, my time in Chicago has only added to my cynicism and ‘strength and courage.’ I think my confidence in being alone for the rest of my life attracts you.”
Ouch.
“You think I’m in it for the chase?”
She shrugs, keeping her eyes ahead of her. “Yeah.” She turns to me and grins. “Look around you, Derek. Every time you step outside this front door, the women of Sage Creek fawn over you. They flag you down in the middle of the street to help them with their poor, sick, animals because you’re the only guy in town who wasn’t born and raised here. They love your dumb chin dimple and the way your eyes shine when they land on something they like. It doesn’t hurt that sometimes you’re nice. Other times you turn them away which only makes them come back for more.”
Make Me Dream (The Sage Creek Series Book 1) Page 25