My ears perked. It was Mather.
“Are you okay?”
I opened myself to respond, but a growl came out of my snout instead. I cursed at myself.
“I’m coming in.”
There was a moment when the doorknob twisted and turned. I realized he must have a key.
I needed to think – and fast.
Mather opened the door, his mouth dropping open the second he saw me.
I couldn’t help myself.
I lunged.
Chapter 9
Mather ducked out of the way just in time. For a moment, I was mesmerized by his quick reflexes. Then, I shook myself out of it and refocused. I didn’t want to admire Mather right now, not when I was finally a wolf. I turned my body, slipping on the smooth floors. I caught myself just in time, running to the top of the staircase.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t stop my momentum, even if I tried. I wasn’t used to being a wolf. I had to go back and figure out how to control myself the way I used to know how. I toppled down the stairs and only caught myself once I reached the bottom. I’d probably have bruises on my body once I returned to my human form, but I didn’t care. I’d worry about that later.
I headed out the back door, scaring Carlos as I ran through the kitchen. The light coming from the cracked door, the crisp breeze that smelled just like nature right after a heavy storm...
God, I missed this.
The second I was outside, I ran as fast as I could. I hadn’t noticed there were actual woods surrounding Mather’s mansion. I knew he had a big backyard, but to see the trees and the bushes, to see dirt.
I rolled around in it, nipping the air as I did so. This was what I wanted. This was why I was feeling so off.
Birds chirped from nests above me, as though they were welcoming me home. Dew still on the leaves and grass helped cool me down. Even the dirt under the shade the trees provided was soft, full of moisture. Everything about this place was perfect.
I ran as far as I could go. I laughed and shook my head, still unable to reconcile the fact that I had allowed someone to give up such an important part of who I was. I would never let that happen again – no matter what. If it was a money issue, I would figure out a way around it. Suppressing my true nature had been wrong, and again, I vowed I would never do it.
I wasn’t sure how long I had been in the woods. Time was irrelevant to me in this moment. After I had fully bathed in the dirt, with leaves and twigs caught in my fur, after the sun peeking through the high tops of the trees began to dim, I realized I should probably head back.
If I had a home to return to in the first place.
I wasn’t sure how Mather was going to respond to the fact that I had practically jumped him. Then again, would he even be aware of the fact that I was the wolf in the first place?
At that moment, I picked up an unfamiliar scent. It was, however, an animal. There was something about it, something I should probably know. I didn’t understand it.
I turned and found another wolf, heading straight towards me. My entire body tensed up and I clenched my teeth, prepared to attack if I needed to. I even let out a growl in warning for good measure.
The wolf stopped, tilted his head to the side.
Why was that simple gesture so familiar?
The male stopped walking and sat in front of me, waiting. Waiting for what, I didn’t know.
I flared my nostrils, my body relaxing, but only slightly. I wanted to sniff him. I wanted to understand who this wolf was.
When I got closer to him, I realized why he was so familiar: he was a shifter. Like me.
My tail started to wag unexpectedly and I rushed at him. He let me sniff him, happy to have me attempt to know him. He stayed in his position, not bothering to move or even sniff me in return. I appreciated his patience.
Then, without warning, his body began to shift. Standing before me was none other than Callum Mather, completely naked, in all of his beautiful glory.
It took me a moment of trying and inwardly cursing at myself, but I finally managed to shift into my human form.
“I knew there was something about you,” he murmured.
He stepped towards me once. When he saw I wasn’t going to move away from him, he stepped again and again until he was inches from me. His hand cupped my face, his thumb extending out so he could trace my jaw. I closed my eyes, leaning into his touch.
“You are mine.” He said it like it was a fact, like I had no choice in the matter. There was no possession behind it, though I was aware he did want to possess me.
“And you are mine.” I reached out with both arms to envelope him into a tight hug, rubbing his back, pressing my bare breasts against his solid torso. “I didn’t know...”
“You’ve been suppressing your wolf,” he said. “It’s why I couldn’t figure out your scent. It was like I knew you, I knew you belonged to me in some way, but I just couldn’t figure out how.”
“There was a serum Ben made us take,” I explained. I hadn’t realized how affected I was by Ben’s treatment until my voice broke. I took a breath, trying to get a hold of myself. “He didn’t want us changing. It was the only way I could sign my contract- and I needed that contract. I used the money to pay for my mom’s medical bills. With her being a shifter, she doesn’t respond to human medicine the way humans would. And with it being cancer, a very human disease...”
He caressed my hair and I closed my eyes once again, resting my head on his chest.
“I have this sudden urge to kill Ben and play with his intestines like chew toys,” Mather said. His tone was so indifferent, he could have been talking about the weather.
I barked out a laugh of surprise. The last thing I expected from Mather was protectiveness or jealousy. Granted, those were traits typically found in wolves. Perhaps he was just good at suppressing them.
“What?” he asked, a small smile on his face.
I leaned into his body and smiled, shaking my head. “It’s nothing,” I said. “I just... I just didn’t expect that from you.”
“Why not?” He seemed affronted by this. When I glanced up to see if he was being serious, his eyes sparkled with mischievousness. “I’m being serious, Jade.” He laughed. “You’re mine.” His voice was low, sending a lightning bolt straight to my pelvis. “I will do anything I am able to in order to protect the people I love. If I found out anything hurts those few people, I will rip them to shreds. No one should have forced you to suppress your wolf. Why agree?”
“I didn’t have a choice,” I said. I made sure to keep the defensiveness out of my tone. It wasn’t his fault my mother had cancer. It wasn’t his fault we had been excommunicated from our pack. It wasn’t his fault for anything happening in our lives. “With my mom... There was no way we could afford any kind of treatment, and I wasn’t going to lose her. Not when...” Tears accumulated in my eyes before I realized it and I hurriedly blinked them away. The last thing I wanted was to cry in front of Mather, especially when I was happy.
He squeezed my shoulder, trying to give me the reassurance I so desperately craved.
“I don’t know much about your mother,” he said in a soft whisper. A light breeze tickled our skin and the hair on my body stood straight up to attention. “I’d like to.”
I tilted my head back up, not sure I believed him. No one really asked about my mom, not even my friends, not even Janet. It was as though they were too afraid to bring her up, as though words were what was killing her and not some illness.
When he gave me a genuine smile in response to my inquiring look, my heart fluttered.
So I told him everything I could. I told him about how stubborn she was, how important it was to her to set an example to me and that was why she left the pack, why she refused to marry someone she didn’t love despite the sacrifice. I never resented her choice, though I was frustrated that that was how the pack decided to respond. I was surprised that he hung onto every word, he asked questions that didn’t feel obligatory, t
hat he wasn’t afraid of handling me and any emotions that might come with talking to me about such a sensitive subject.
“I think I’d like to meet her,” Mather said when I was finally finished. “One day.”
“Yeah...” I let my voice trail off. “When she’s better.” I forced myself to say when, not if. “I just... I mean, she’d be really excited to meet you. She’s never told me directly, but I do think she’s worried that I’m never going to find a mate because of her decision to leave her pack. Well, it really wasn’t her decision, was it, if they basically told her she had to leave unless she married – I mean, I guess that technically means she was free to make her choice –“
“Jade.” Mather squeezed my shoulder with his hand and my stomach burst into butterflies. “You’re babbling.”
I knew it.
God.
However, when I looked over at him, I saw his a small smile on his lips. He was amused, but not because he was laughing at me. His eyes were soft, filled with wonder, but I couldn’t say for sure what that was.
“You’re cute,” he said, moving his hand from my shoulder to pinch my cheek.
“Uh, anyway.” I looked down, playing with the blades of grass underneath me. My face warmed with redness at his statement. “My mom worries I won’t find someone I, uh, care about. She doesn’t say it because she doesn’t know what’s going to happen to her because of this disease. But she wants to be a grandma. I think it would make her happy, knowing I have someone in my life –“
“You want to have babies with?” Mather teased.
I turned even redder. “Oh my – that isn’t what I meant.” I bit my bottom lip, shaking my head. “I swear, I’m not, I’m not trying to scare you off. I’m not trying to rush things or anything like that. I just –“
Mather gently placed a finger on my lips, silencing me. “You don’t have to worry about that,” he said. “You can talk to me about anything you want. You can’t scare me off, Jade. You can’t push me away. If you need time to yourself, if you need space, I will gladly give it. I will not be your keeper. But I will always be waiting for you to return. However long you need.”
My lips turned up into a small smile. “Thank you,” I murmured.
“You don’t have to thank me,” he said through a gentle chuckle. He pulled out a wildflower and tucked it behind me ear. “It’s about respect. And I respect you. To go back to your comment about kids, when you’re ready to talk about them, I’m here. I don’t mean we’re going to have them right away – unless that’s something you want – but we can talk about them. I want kids too. I would be honored making your mom a grandmother – once she gets better, of course.”
“You think she’ll get better?” I asked. I couldn’t contain the hope in my voice if I tried.
Mather paused, reaching out to play with my hair. “I think your mom is a fighter and always has been – from the limited information I have of her,” he said. “I think that if she found out you had a man who loved you, she might fight harder, knowing the possibility of grandkids was in her near-future.”
Chapter 10
Love?
Mather loved me?
I didn’t think such a thing was possible. And yet, lying with him under the full moon, our bodies completely naked, I couldn’t help but understand it.
“I love you too,” I told him. I was surprised by the honesty in the words.
This was what it meant to find my mate, I realized. I didn’t want to admit it, but I had been worried about the whole mating for life thing. As a wolf, it was expected that I would find my mate within the pack. Typically, that was true. However, I saw what happened on the other side of the coin. I saw what happened when the pack forced things to happen for the good of the pack. I saw my mother stand up for herself and I saw the repercussions of that. It was why I avoided being part of a pack at all – my identity would be forgotten because the pack would have to come first.
That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. But if I didn’t comply with what the pack wanted...
My mother had been excommunicated, and that seemed like a blessing.
Still, it left me wondering if I missed my opportunity to find my mate. I couldn’t help but think I would be destined to either be alone or tangled up with some human who wouldn’t understand what I was, who I would have to hide my true self from. The thought of doing something like that scared me which was how I wound up being single for such a long time.
But this? With Mather?
Destiny did exist. I had found my mate even though I didn’t have a pack. And he had found his, even though he didn’t belong to one either. We just couldn’t see it because I couldn’t shift.
Mather pulled me into a deep kiss, his hand still holding onto mine. We only broke apart so we could breathe. His eyes took me in, sculpted my face. There was such an intensity in them that I could not help but look away. My cheeks flooded with warmth. I didn’t know why I was suddenly shy but I was. It was almost embarrassing.
“Don’t do that,” he said in a voice just above a whisper. “Don’t hide yourself away from me. Not anymore.”
My eyes fluttered until they looked at him again. He cupped my cheek with his rough hand – at least I understood why they were rough now. His lips curved up into a smile and I couldn’t help but grin in return.
“What?” I asked. “Why are you smiling like that?”
“Because I finally found you,” he said. His fingers danced across my jaw before they dropped to my throat. “I knew I would, I just didn’t think...” He shook his head. “I knew there was something about you.’
He dropped his hand even further so it ghosted across my collarbone and traced the outline of my breast. I threw my head back and shuddered, my eyes closing on their own accord. He continued to touch me, following the curve of my body until he found my waist.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he murmured, more to himself than to me.
I wanted to respond in kind, but all I managed to get out was a small whimper.
Without warning, he flipped me so I was on my stomach. He placed his other hand on my other hip, arching my back so my butt was in the air and my upper body was pressed into the grass. My knees were spread open. I could feel the grass stick to my skin.
He ran his hand down my back, following my spine until it touched my ass and then slapped it. My eyes snapped open and I let out a moan.
He slammed his hard cock into my folds so hard it hurt. I clenched my jaw together. I didn’t want him to stop. I didn’t want him to think I was weak.
I spread my fingers in the grass, digging them into the dirt. My nails filled with the moist soil. I needed to hold my balance, keep myself strong.
“Touch yourself,” he commanded. “Touch yourself for me.”
I lifted one hand and brought it between my thighs. “Yes, sir,” I said.
He stopped abruptly but did not pull out of me. He molded his chest to my back, one arm wrapping around me to stop my own pleasure.
“Not sir,” he said, his voice gentle. “When we’re outside the room, you can call me anything you want. The only place you must address me as sir is that room.”
I nodded my head, warmth spreading through my body. He resumed his pace; I began to touch myself once more.
I wasn’t sure why I was smiling. Obviously the sex was great, but it was more than just good sex.
This was what it felt like to have sex with someone you love, a voice whispered into my mind. This was what it felt like to be with your mate.
My fingers increased their pace on my clit. I could feel my orgasm building. Based on his breathing, I knew he was almost ready to release himself inside of me – I didn’t think he actually used a condom. The thought made me shiver with delight. He was marking me, claiming me as his own, and I wanted that.
It hit me like a wave crashing into the shore. I didn’t even have time to warn him. He didn’t need one. His grip on me tightened and he kept up his pace, not hesitating for one
second. I twitched and spasmed around his cock, completely out of control, completely helpless.
My head was light, so high in the sky, I was lost to everyone else. Mather grunted and I could tell he was close. Part of me didn’t even care. I know that was selfish, but I couldn’t help it. My entire body was composed of sensitive nerves. I couldn’t even take a breath without some kind of mixture of pain and pleasure overtaking myself.
I reached up, scratching Mather’s back. It wasn’t as passionate as it could have been, pre-orgasm, but I was doing my best. He probably didn’t even need my encouragement.
When he finally released himself inside of me, he shouted my name. I hoped no one was around to hear. Not just now, but when we started. I sure as hell hadn’t been quiet, and I hadn’t cared until just now. My body turned red just thinking about Carlos cleaning the kitchen with the window open to let in a nice breeze and hearing all of the sounds Mather and I had been making.
“Jesus Christ,” he said. “So that’s what it’s like to make love.”
I momentarily forgot my concerns so I could turn on my side and face Mather. “You’ve never made love before?” I asked, surprised.
He shook his head, his eyelids drooping. He pulled me close to his body and I clung to him, hook my ankle around his and resting my head on the crook of his shoulder. It was silly to think, but it almost felt as though his body was made for mine. I wondered if he felt the same way about me. Would it be cheesy if I hoped he did?
“I never saw a reason to,” he said. The sun was high over us now, warming our bodies. It was probably almost lunch time. “Even when I was young, I never wanted to get attached to anyone, especially when all anyone ever said was that I should be expecting to find my mate once the transition took over. I had my fun, of course, but nothing more than that. And once I was an adult, and created my own company, I needed something to ground me, to remind me that even with this beast inside of me, even with the market being the way it was, I could be in control of something.”
“That’s why you like inflicting pain on the girls?” I asked in a voice just above a whisper. I wasn’t planning on talking about this. I wasn’t sure if it was too early or if it would be one of those subjects we didn’t actually address – which would have been fine. But since he brought it up, I didn’t see the harm in it.
Bound to Change: A Limited Edition Spring Shifter Romance Collection Page 82