Cole: The Wounded Sons

by Leah Sharelle

  Steeping forward, Grill laid a hand on my shoulder, then nodded at Kodah.

  “Gabe is right mate, Deke went rogue; he acted like a rookie grunt instead of the commando he trained to be.”

  “Something was going on with him,” Rafe muttered, scrubbing a hand down his face, “something that got him killed and made Ghost make a combat sensitive call.”

  “He fucked up Kodah, not Ghost.”

  Kodah paced around the room like a caged lion looking for an arm to bite off, his shoulders worked, his face thunderous.

  My spidey senses started to tingle, a feeling of dread washing over me.

  Kodah knows. He knows what was wrong with Deke.

  “You gonna share, Ziggerman? Or are you going to continue sitting up on that high horse of yours and blame me for everything,” I taunted my fellow commando and mate.

  “Cole.”

  “Ghost, easy.”

  Gabe and Rafe said at the same time, their tones warning me to back down. Kodah was visibly struggling, that much was certain, but I was done with him laying blame at my feet and mine only. The surprise panel today, and the pressure at home with Dad, and the worry that this was not a good time to leave Oaklee alone at the Club, knowing Dad was suspicious. The last thing I needed now was Ziggerman giving me more grief about something I could not undo.

  “Deke was gay,” Kodah blurted out, shocking the entire room with his surprising outburst. All of us silent and stunned.

  “I found out when I accidentally walked in on him and another soldier.” Kodah suddenly stopped pacing, dropping to the closest bunk, which ironically was the same one Deke used when we came here.

  “He looked fucking gutted when I walked in and saw him, there was no hiding what he was doing if you get my drift. He had no recourse but to watch me looking at the both of them.”

  “What … what, did you do?” Gabe stammered, his expression unreadable.

  Shrugging, Kodah tried to smile, but it was more of a grimace. “I said to him, ‘hope you are using a dinger, mate,’ and walked out.” Choking out a laugh, his head dropped to his chest.

  “Good call,” Bastian piped in, “safe sex is important.”

  “Agreed, in this day and age of transmitted diseases and all,” Rafe agreed, and I couldn’t help the bellow of laughter that burst from my lips.

  “He found me later that day, tried to make light of it, but I called him on it, and he admitted he and his friend were in a relationship.”

  “Who?” I asked, not sure why I needed to know that, but I did.

  “A SEAL, I didn’t ask for his name. I didn’t think it was important. But I think Deke did, and I think he was expecting more questions from me about it, ya know? And when I didn’t ask, I think he got the impression I was disgusted or some shit. That all of you would be too.”

  “That is fucking bullshit, and you know it, mate!” Gabe gritted out, his fists clenching.

  “We,” Gabe said, looking at me then at Bastian, “have family members that are gay. Ford and Lucky are married; for fuck’s sake, we don’t judge anyone’s choices.”

  “Never have and never will,” Bastian growled, looking affronted by the very suggestion we would have a problem with Deke’s sexuality.

  “How long have you known?” I asked Kodah, suspicions raising my hackles.

  Kodah had too good a decency to look contrite. “A few months, give or take. He begged me to keep it to myself until he could find the right way to tell you, or at least that’s what he said.”

  “So, you knew and didn’t say anything, and in the meantime, you give me shit about Oaklee and me.” I didn’t ask, rather I accused, pissed that he turned judgement on me when all the while he was hiding his own great secrets—the ones about Deke and his sister.

  “I gave you shit because I know what a secret does, Ghost. It ate Deke up so bad he fucking died, taking it with him,” Kodah tossed out, glaring at me.

  “And the other one? Monroe? How is that any different to me with Oaklee?”

  “It’s different because I haven’t been there yet. I’m not bedding her and going on with life as if she doesn’t exist, only acknowledging her when we are alone like you are doing. She deserves to be known for her worth, not hidden like a dirty secret.”

  “Fucking hell not this shit again,” Bastian groaned, throwing a can of drink across the room.

  Moving quickly, I launched myself at Kodah, only to be intercepted by Ammo’s massive frame. His arms banding around me, squeezing the breath from my lungs.

  “I fucking told you if you say anything about Oaklee again, I would beat the crap out of you,” I roared, fighting against Bastian’s hold on me. Fury overwhelmed me, my darkness rising to the surface.

  “Enough of this shit, Kodah!” Gabe roared. “Cole is aware of what his situation is; what you don’t seem to understand is your continued beef with him is infecting this team. It is time for you to stop dwelling on what Cole is doing and start focusing on what you are going to do.” With a nod to Bastian, Gabe signalled for him to let me go, his eyes narrowing at me in warning to stay put.

  For now, I will, but I wasn’t making any promises that Kodah wasn’t going to feel my fists hitting his face. Soon.

  “With Monroe, you mean?” Kodah asked with a low growl, his posture guarded as he watched me closely.

  “That, yes, and what you are doing to the team. I need to know that when we go out there, all my men have the same level of backup we have come to depend on for years. Second-guessing Cole and questioning his decisions is not going to fly under my command, mate.”

  Kodah glared at Gabe, the tension doubling in his body language.

  “What are you saying, Tank?” Kodah’s head whipped around to look at Gabe, his look incredulous at what Gabe was suggesting, and honestly, so was I.

  “Get right with everything, or I will have no other choice but to relieve you of your dagger beret. This team is on notice; you heard the panel, the Sons are being watched. I will not let something I have worked hard for fail because of some schoolyard bullshit. Is that clear, Corporal?”

  I waited for Kodah to answer, hating that Gabe said what he said, but I understood it just the same. Team FIVE’s existence was hanging in the balance, and I feared we were about to implode.

  Kodah looked crushed, Gabe’s ultimatum hitting him where it hurt the most. The very thing that he cherished the most.

  Our brotherhood.

  A wave of understanding washed over me; Kodah didn’t deserve to own all the heat, I was just as guilty as he was. His talking shit about Oaklee landed on him, yes, but I was in a similar position of secrecy as he was.

  About to come to his defence, the sound of shrilling beepers going off put a stop to it.

  “Fuck!” I bellowed, reaching for my pager at my waistband, Gabe’s mobile going off at the same time, walking off while he answered the call.

  “So much for two months off,” Bastian complained, stabbing a thick finger at his device and tossing it on the bed. “Wren is going to crush my balls off if I miss too much of this pregnancy.”

  “Tell me about it,” Rafe grumbled, “Peyton will cut me off forever if I don’t make it home before she gives birth.”

  “Millie is going through the terrible twos early, and Bunny is not going to be happy,” Grill mumbled worriedly.

  I didn’t join in on the complaints; my mind too busy reeling with the news on Deke and leaving Oaklee for the first time. Going on a training exercise was one thing, but deployment was a whole different kettle.

  Fuck.

  This was not the time to be leaving her with so much up in the air. I promised her that I would be talking to Dad when I got back in nine days. I worried if the unknown timeframe was going to upset Oaklee; she had a hard time when I freaked out with the whole Doc incident. Admittedly, I didn’t handle that as well as I could have, the vision still plagued me, if I was honest. Oaklee on the back of another man’s bike, not something I needed to be focusing on when I
was about to deploy, however. I wouldn’t be able to stop worrying about Oaklee in Ballarat with my father, though.

  Knowing she loves me helps the nerves of leaving but does nothing to stop the anxiety. On our last night together before I left for Sydney, our lovemaking was the best of my life. Oaklee taking me into her mouth and giving me oral just about blew my mind, as well as blowing my load down her throat. We said goodbye sweetly, just the two of us, dawn breaking around us. Oaklee cried a little, but she held herself together like a trooper, even insisting I take photos for her so she could see what the base looked like compared to Queenscliff. That made me nearly choke on my spit, but I still pulled out my phone when we rolled up to the gates this morning and snapped a few shots and texted them to her.

  Fuck, I loved her, fucking miss her so much.

  “Right, gear up, boys, we have a flight to catch,” Gabe announced, coming back to the group with his game face firmly in place.

  “Where?” I asked immediately.

  Please don’t say the jungle, please don’t say the jungle.

  “The Democratic Republic of the Congo,” Gabe replied, smirking. “Sorry, Ghost, I know how much the humidity messes with your hair.” Then pissed he himself laughing when I flipped him the bird.

  “Seriously, you have half an hour to get your gear in order and ring your women before we leave. We are catching a ride to Darwin, then straight to Africa.”

  “Official or under the table?” Rafe enquired, his phone in his hand.

  “Totally black, no contact, no record.”

  “So, no help either,” Bastian surmised correctly. I hated these kinds of covert missions. Not that we couldn’t handle them, but they were getting annoying. The brigadier and major general busted our arses not an hour ago, practically putting us under the microscope for what he called our privileged and favoured treatment, and yet who gets called up to go under the radar? Fucking Team FIVE. Again.

  “Five weeks, taking out some militia causing civil unrest, and generally pissing off the peacemakers.” With a roll of his eyes, Gabe picked up his laptop and headed for the bathroom.

  “If I am going to tell Devon we might have to postpone the wedding, I’d better do it on Skype. That way, I can look at her while she calls me every name under the sun,” he muttered, disappearing into the bathroom.

  The rest of the team dispersed to various corners of the room to make their calls, Kodah stalking out of the barracks slamming the door behind him.

  “We’ve got trouble brewing, Ghost,” Rafe said quietly, looking at the door with a foreboding expression. My gut was telling me Rafe was correct in making that assumption, but there was more than just trouble brewing with Deke, something worse.

  “Let’s not worry about something that may not happen, mate, just what is going on now.” Grabbing my phone off my bunk, I swiped it open and found my Temptress in my contacts. Making the first call to her to inform her of a mission was not going to be fun; while I was used to shipping off to war-ravaged parts of the world, Oaklee was yet to experience a deployment as my girlfriend, and that’s what was making me nervous.

  How was she going to cope in my absence?

  Will it trigger a setback in her eating disorder?

  That was my biggest concern, that and my father.

  Putting the phone to my ear, I listened as it rang three times. Then the sweetest voice in the world hit my ears.

  “Hey, honey. I miss you.”

  And just like that, there was light again.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  OAKLEE

  “I’m telling you, Thayer, he knows!” I whisper yelled into the phone.

  “How does he know? Did he say something to you?” Thayer asked, in the background I could hear the Eagles playing. Thayer was a throwback; she loved old school music, doing her washing at laundry mats, eight-track tapes … and, of course, bikers.

  “Well, not out loud, but I know he knows something Thay. He looks at me all the time, and his scowl is scarier than normal.”

  I was sitting in the breakroom at the bookstore, and my most reliable worker was looking after the customers, which there was a steady stream of thanks to the new Willow Rose release. Readers have been filtering in all day to purchase a copy of Love Gone Wrong, as well as hoping for a glimpse of Willow herself. Unfortunately for them, my boss liked to keep a low profile the majority of the time, only making an appearance at scheduled signings.

  “If his scowl is anything like your hunky boyfriend’s, then I understand your fear,” Thayer joked. “But, babes, you do have a solution, you know, like telling Creed.”

  “Yes, Thayer, I am aware; Cole will tell him when he gets back. Creed and Memphis would already know by now, but Cole got called up and pushed that conversation back,” I explained again for the hundredth time.

  A low growl came over the line, followed by a string of colourful and Thayer-inspired curses. “Hell’s bells Oaks, that is bullshit! You are grown-ups, aren’t ya? I don’t get why Cole is so worried about his father’s opinion on this.” Thayer’s voice reaching a record level of screeching as she let her view on the matter known. Again.

  “We don’t have the same type of parents as Cole does, Thay,” I replied, trying to placate and steer her off one of her rants. That wasn’t what I needed right at that moment. “His father actually cares about his sons and daughter, not something either of us is accustomed to or understand.”

  Sighing, Thayer hummed in agreement. “I get that, I do. And in a way, I understand Cole wants to speak to his father in person. But Oaks, I won’t lie to you, I don’t like it, and I am worried about you.”

  “Why?”

  “Oh, come off it, Oaklee,” Thayer scoffed, “Cole has been gone only two weeks and already I have noticed a weight loss on you. Him leaving you with everything up in the air, dealing with it on your own, what are you going to be like when his deployment is up? Hell! What if he has to stay longer? You did say that was a possibility.”

  Trust Thayer to hit the nail on the head, to see the bigger picture, and generally be a pain in my arse.

  Tossing a scowl at the uneaten sandwich, I reached for the water bottle and chugged down half of it. Stalling before answering my friend and filling my stomach to get rid of the hunger cramps.

  “Don’t think you are fooling me, Oaklee Jane Banks,” Thayer growled, working herself up into lecture mode. “I know you better than anyone, so don’t try and hide your fear from me. I also know that somewhere there is an uneaten lunch, and instead, you are filling up on water.”

  Immediately, I looked around for either a hidden camera or Thayer herself.

  “Damn it, Thayer, will you get out of my head!” I seethed, annoyed at her and myself. Her for seeing too much and me for being so bloody transparent.

  “I will if you will!” she shouted back at me, her voice almost at shrill volume.

  “This is not the way to deal with your problems, Oaks, and you know that. Your health isn’t something to mess with, babes.”

  Tears threatened to spill as I listened to my bestie tell me something I was quickly forgetting. The overwhelming need to control something in my life was starting to consume me, a familiar and unwelcomed notion.

  Being away from Cole sucked, but I could handle it. It wasn’t as if I haven’t ever been alone before, but the scrutiny from Creed … that I wasn’t sure of.

  My job meant the world to me, but Cole was my future. I was so freaking in love with him, the very thought of losing him brought an ache to my chest. And a sinking feeling in my stomach that wouldn’t quit, other than the hunger pains.

  Hearing the voice of Memphis at the front of the shop, I said a hurried goodbye to Thayer, promising to catch up with her soon, then hung up.

  Hastily dumping the sandwich and wrap into the bin, I took a few seconds to hide it further in the bottom of the waste bin, covering it with an old newspaper and a few empty drink bottles, old tricks resurfacing.

  Twisting my hands together, I
yanked my hoody from the back of the chair and quickly put it on to cover the thinness of my upper arms that was appearing again. To me it was noticeable, and obviously to Thayer, others I wasn’t sure though, so it was better to be safe than sorry. I didn’t do well with uninvited questions about my weight at the best of times. Giving them a visual and a reason to ask, not a good idea.

  Jogging out to the front, I stopped short when I saw half of the Flock standing with Memphis. Thanks to my friendship with Wren, Devon, Peyton and Addy, I was spending more of my free time at the compound with them, which meant I was getting to know the older ladies of the Souls. So far, I was holding my own, but damn if they weren’t an intimidating group of women. I thought Thayer was bad, she had nothing on the Flock. Shit, they would chew Thayer up and spit her out.

  “Hey there everyone,” I called out, grimacing at the wobble in my voice.

  Four heads turned my way, and four sets of eyes travelled over my face, down my body and back up again, this time narrowed and wary. Memphis stepped forward with the help of Rainn, who was whispering something in her ear.

  Rainn scared me, she out of all them, didn’t come at you with gentle bullshit. She called it like it was, and so far, I had escaped her method of interrogation, but I had heard stories about it from Devon and Wren.

  Like I said, Rainn scared me.

  Casting a worried glance over the ladies, I forgot to school my expression, as Memphis lifted her hands to my face and traced her fingers over my lips, forehead and cheeks, she even touched my neck, down to my collar bones and back up again.

  “We need to talk. Now!” Memphis declared, taking her hands away and folding them across her chest.

  “Umm, I am sort of working, boss,” I hedged, shifting my feet nervously.

  “That’s why I am here,” Mia chirped, stepping forward, “I am taking your spot while Memphis, Rain, and Charlotte take you to lunch.”