by J L Lawrence
Her emotions, or lack thereof, were scattered at best. The sparkle in her eyes had dimmed like she hadn’t wanted to return. Angie stepped forward as if meaning to embrace her, then abruptly stopped and latched her hands onto Kate’s temples, uttering a spell. Memories spilled back into Kate’s mind, reminding her of the past and who she’d become.
When had Angie learned complicated magic like that? Xander watched the moments reabsorb into her mind. At least, most of them.
Kate blinked several times. “How did you know to do that?”
“When you did it for Xavier, I asked Rowena about it. She told me to access all your memories, especially from your human years, and lock it away. She said there might come a time when you’d need to be reminded. I guess she knew something we didn’t. Typical, right?” Angie hugged her this time and Kate returned the embrace.
He didn’t want to ruin Angie’s happiness, but something still wasn’t right with this new version of Kate. Her ability for compassion had been reduced, and her sympathy to humans seemed nonexistent. Whatever had happened in the last trial eliminated a piece of her core being. And her humanity had proved crucial to her success so far. What did it all mean?
“Time to go.”
Xavier met his eyes and shrugged. He didn’t know what to make of the new version of the Mystic either. Maybe Rowena could help. “Would you like us to set up the portal?”
“Not necessary.” Before they could ask why, Kate twisted her hand in the air and they appeared back home in the Meadows.
What the…? Xander watched as Angie waited for the effects of travel, but they didn’t come. Kate hadn’t needed a portal to enter. Even Rowena had to enter this realm through a portal. Her powers had become scarily advanced. He didn’t know how to approach her anymore. He needed to get her to the Council and see if they could fix her.
Nikki burst through the study door and pulled him and Xavier into a big hug. Then she threw her arms around Angie. He couldn’t help but notice her actions toward Kate were much cooler than normal. She could see the difference, too. Maybe later he’d ask for her thoughts on Kate’s new persona.
“Sorry, we don’t have much time to get caught up. Ace, Marco, and some humans went out to secure the perimeter around the new base camp. They noticed demons lurking again and didn’t want to take any chances when we relocate. There were more than expected, so they need your help with injuries. They’ve brought them to the training facility. Kate, you’re the strongest and can heal them quickly.”
Angie jumped up. “Let’s go.” She grabbed Kate and pulled her along. Her lack of concern about the injuries disturbed him. She didn’t want to be bothered about the small stuff. Her thoughts swirled around battle strategies like someone had reprogrammed her brain to constantly run analytics. Was this normal? He needed to talk to Marcus and Rowena.
They popped in at the facility as the wounded arrived. Angie’s anguished cry captured his attention. Chris had been severely wounded. A large gash crossed his head, reaching almost to the bone. He had a hole in his side where a demon had probably tried to rip out his heart and luckily missed. A freaking miracle that he’d lived this long.
He expected Kate to rush to his side and heal him, but she didn’t move. Rowena’s expression answered his earlier questions. She met Kate’s eyes and bowed her head. Something had happened during that last trial that stole a piece of her soul. He’d swear to it. Her uninterested gaze and lack of sympathy made him sick.
What if his Kate never came back?
A sharp crack brought him out of his shock. Everyone sucked in a gasp as Kate slowly lifted her head and met Angie’s infuriated glare. She’d smacked Kate square across her cheek. He could see the hand print starting to form. Angie hadn’t held back any of her anger. He braced for Kate’s retaliation and Xavier stepped beside Angie.
Stone-faced, Kate raised an eyebrow. “Why did you do that?”
Her emotionless stare frightened him. Chris groaned, barely hanging on. Rowena hadn’t intervened to heal him, so maybe this was a defining moment for Kate, or a lesson to be learned by all.
Angie pointed at him. “Are you kidding? Who are you? I’d rather have died during your quest than returned with whatever the hell you are. I always defended you when others called you the Ice Queen, but I see it in you now. You’ve become your worst fear. Heal him. Heal him now, or God as my witness, I’ll find a way to destroy you once this is over.”
Her words finally resonated with Kate. Somewhere deep inside, their bond still existed and she could hear her plea for help.
Kate rolled her eyes. “He’s just a human. We can get more. Why should I waste an ounce of my power for those we’ll only sacrifice anyway? It isn’t worth my time.” She sighed as Angie’s face turned a new shade of crimson. “But if it means that much to you, fine.”
She held out her hand, but Angie grabbed it. Kate tilted her head in confusion with a strange look in her eyes.
Angie pointed down at Chris. “No Kate, not that way. Use your hands. Do this for me, please?” Angie opened her mind and poured all her memories of them into Kate. It broke through Kate’s hardened shell enough that she dropped to the ground beside her dying friend.
The moment her hand touched Chris’s blood, emotions stormed her body. Xander gasped from the impact, but stayed connected to her. Tears flowed down her cheeks as she repaired his side and closed the wound. Then she laid her hand across his forehead, healing the wide gash.
Her tears fell across his face, finishing the process and waking him. He reached up and pulled a strand of her hair. “I knew the whole Ice Queen thing wasn’t real. Thanks for saving me, even though it took you long enough.”
She smiled and kissed his cheek, then quieted his mind, so he could rest and finish healing.
“Humans are so very fragile,” she muttered under her breath. Her emotions created a whirlwind in her mind. “And so was I once.”
Xander helped her to her feet. His heart lightened when her gaze rose to meet his, and her brilliant blue swirling eyes had returned. For the first time, he believed in fate’s design. If Angie hadn’t joined them, where would they all be? If Xavier hadn’t stepped out of the shadows, would they have made it this far? And Kate’s parents, what if they had raised her in this world? Would she be as strong? Could she have completed the trials? In his heart, he knew the answer and had a greater respect for the grand design. He didn’t have to like it, but he respected it.
Kate wrapped Angie in a huge bear hug. “Thank you for setting me free.”
“Anytime. I’m always on board to smack the shit out of you when you need it.”
Kate’s laughter rang out like music to his ears. “Just don’t make a habit of it.” She winked.
Rowena cleared her throat. “I’d like to have a quick debriefing before we head our separate ways.” She pointed at a conference room to the side.
They all had questions, so he nodded and followed Kate inside. Xavier looked as stunned as the rest. Zane’s silence wasn’t helping. No one seemed to understand what had happened or how she broke free.
“Kate, tell us about the third trial. Your mind shut down from all of us like you’d been wiped off the planet. For a few moments, you disappeared from Micah’s visions, giving us all a major shock. Where did you go?” He hadn’t realized things had gotten that scary when she’d been encased in the strange mist at Drombeg.
“I had to face myself. The first part involved killing demons. I had to choose a path. One gave infinite knowledge and looked like the Faery Realm. The other option looked like the dark forests of Hell and held unspeakable horrors. I chose door number two.”
“Why?”
“The mystical being guiding my journey told me the dangers of the lighted path. People had been stuck for years amazed by the knowledge within. No one wanted to stay long on the other path, so it became the quickest option to return to Angie and save her.”
Nothing else had to be said about her choice. They all knew she wo
uldn’t have considered any other path.
Marcus leaned forward and took her hand. “We understand. What happened once you entered the dark entrance?”
She hesitated not wanting to remember. He didn’t blame her. “The first part went quickly. I killed several demons and tapped into powers I didn’t even know I possessed. My last battle with a thorn demon, I had to fight as a human. Challenging but with my training, I found a way. When I defeated him, it felt great like I had finally brought justice to all the victims I couldn’t save as a human.” Her voice trailed off and her eyes darkened.
Xander held his arms around her shoulders, and Rowena took her other hand. “What happened next, Kate?” she softly said. “You need to face it.”
“I…” She stopped and took a deep breath. “I had to confront myself. What I’d truly have to sacrifice to save an entire world. The darkness disappeared and opened to a never-ending desert. It stretched out before me like a vast endless ocean. My human body remained. I had no powers or abilities. I felt every pain, doubt, and fear running through me. I thought I’d failed when I could go no further and collapsed.” She couldn’t continue so she showed them by placing her memories on the screen until her final battle cry rang out, freeing her from the mystical test.
No one spoke for a full minute. In addition to seeing the scene unfold, she’d let them feel her emotions during the whole thing. Camilla’s eyes overflowed with tears and even Micah appeared visibly moved. She’d purposely severed a piece of herself to embrace the power to save them all. She’d become the phoenix in addition to the Mystic. A double dose to atone for mistakes of the past.
Guilt consumed him. She shouldn’t have had to make that journey alone. He should’ve been there at least as her guide.
Angie filled them in regarding the final visit from Cass and revealed another secret. “Cassius knew what you’d sacrificed. He reminded me about the strength of our bond and that the blood between friends would be stronger than your transition. When you seemed so disconnected, even after I gave you our memories, I took a chance that the blood of a friend would bring you back to us. I asked Rowena and the others to trust me and allow only you to heal Chris. I had to take the risk and believe in you.” She stopped before voicing her last thought that at least Kate seemed mostly back to normal. He agreed.
Like him, she sensed something was still missing. At this point, he’d take mostly normal and worry about the rest later. Her mind had reopened to him and her internal warmth and compassion had returned. Good enough for now. Angie’s insistence with the healing made more sense. She’d become skilled at hiding her thoughts behind the protective shield of the Mystic. The surprise in Xavier’s expression provided further proof of her increased abilities.
This time Nikki didn’t hesitate when scooping Kate into a massive hug. Rowena leaned back in her chair and exchanged a glance with Marcus who nodded in return. Then she stood. “I think we’ve all had enough adventure for at least a few hours. Tristan, if you’ll finish up the current training session, I’d appreciate it. I sense they all need some recovery time after this last occurrence.” He stood and exited. Micah popped out returning to his solitude. The rest remained after they left.
Xander suspected Rowena had a lot more on her mind, but decided not to share with them yet.
They returned home. It wasn’t cold, but he started the fire anyway. Sitting in the study, they listened to the fire crackle and allowed their minds to decompress from the last several weeks.
Xavier broke the silence first. “Tomorrow I’ll go and collect our things from Ireland.”
Before he finished the sentence, Kate nonchalantly waved her hand and all their things appeared in the middle of the room.
“Ok, maybe not.” He shrugged and leaned back.
“No one leaves the Meadows until the Rising. In a few days we’ll move to the new location to arrive early and prepare, but we stay protected until that time. I’m not even sure if I’ll travel to the shadows for now. Zane is aware of everything, but there’s not much more they can give. Their traps are ready. We must accept their involvement will be minimal and find another way.”
He couldn’t wait to hear this. “What way would that be?”
Her gaze drifted. “I’m thinking it’s time to tap the potential of a new realm. And I know just who to ask for help.”
Everyone leaned forward hooked on her words, but she settled back against him and closed her eyes. “All in good time. The answer’s always been right in front of us.”
Great. She’d become cryptic like all the prophecies she hated. He’d worry about it later. Wasn’t like he’d be able to change her mind anyway. He’d take the moment of peace and be thankful. It wouldn’t last long. It never did.
After sitting for a few more minutes, they headed to their room. Everyone else followed them out. Something still poked at the back of his mind. Some piece of Kate wasn’t in place. He’d spent countless hours in her mind getting to know and understand the life she’d led and obstacles she’d overcome. So what could be missing? She had her love of humans back.
Never thought I’d be happy about that one.
He froze. All the compartments she’d once had full of life’s not-so-pleasant experiences, including all the victims from her FBI days, were gone. The pain and caution those had provided completed the person she’d become. Chris’s blood had returned all the good, but what happened to the bad? It had to be somewhere. What would happen if it returned? Or worse, what if it didn’t return?
A chill and fresh new wave of fear traveled down his spine. Cass warned them that she still had one more test to pass. Would losing part of her memories prevent her from embracing the light?
Terror gripped his heart as he finally acknowledged the likelihood that he’d lose her in this battle. Too many obstacles were in their way. Time slipped away like sand through an hourglass.
Scooping her in his arms, he forced the thoughts aside and decide to make every moment count. He pushed her back onto their bed and proceeded to show her how much he loved every single inch of her.
* * *
Angie turned and tucked her head under Xavier’s chin. He kissed her forehead. “Been a rough couple of days, huh? I still can’t believe you slapped Kate. I don’t know anyone else with the guts to do that. I wouldn’t dream of it.”
“I’ve never feared her. She rattled me for a minute or two, but I know her heart. She’s still not whole. I’m sure Xander’s told you the same. It breaks my heart to see the memories of her crawling through the desert desperate to save me. To save the world.” Kate’s love knew no boundaries, and she’d offer everything on the battlefield. It’d cost her just as much. Everything.
That future she couldn’t change. Trust is all she could offer and would place it all in Kate’s capable hands. The future between her and Xavier wasn’t as clear. “What happens when this is over? Assuming we win and live of course.” She hated to have this conversation again but needed reassurance.
Sighing, he pushed himself up and scooted back to rest against the headboard. “We enjoy each other and the second chance at life we’ve been given. What else is there? We’ve talked about this at length.”
“No, I mean details. What do you see for us?”
“We’ll stay in the Meadows for a while to help restore all the realms and repair damage. It’s hard to know how long. Depends on who survives and what’s needed of us. Eventually, we’ll enter the Human Realm, move into the apartment that Kate kept for us, and spend time in New Orleans in the mansion that Xander bought for Kate as an anniversary gift.” He winked and held a finger up to his lips.
Angie wanted more. She couldn’t see the future past all the battles and death anymore. “How will we leave them? You know it’ll take years to clean up the mess from this battle, especially with the Shadow Warriors still needing help. If you turn human, who will help your brother track all the demons that escape?”
She reached up, cupped his cheek, and looked deep
into his eyes. “I think you should reconsider converting to humanity. Stay with me as long as you can. I bet Kate will be able to maintain my appearance till the end. Then devote yourself to the reason you were born. A warrior with a great destiny to serve the Mystic. We’ll still have a long life together and children. At least think about it.”
He took her hands and lowered his forehead to hers. “Angie, I didn’t decide this lightly. Without you, I’d fade back into the shadows. Those scars run too deep. I’d only cause Xander more pain by watching me suffer again. My life stopped existing until you. I’d made my peace and planned to cross over once Xander found Kate. But he found you, too, and it changed me. Our lives will be amazing, and we will decide when it’s time to leave the magical world behind to embrace our new life together. Yes, we’ll die as humans, but I’m okay with that.”
Tears slid down her cheeks. A part of her still didn’t believe that this is what he wanted. He’d settled for a new future but it wasn’t fair. “But what kind of life will it be? What will the world look like with everything we know? Would we ever be safe from that world?”
“A life that holds beauty and wonder. We’ll make a home together and have a couple children. Whether they are human or magical, we’ll raise them and love them. And we’ll know they have guardian angels always watching out for them. They’ll never be alone, and their destiny may be greater than ours. Look how yours turned out. What else are you searching for? I can’t give you an absolute guarantee what the future holds, but does it matter as long as we’re together?”
She continued to sniffle, but began to feel better. She needed to lay all her fears out on the table. “I’d like to see a happy ever after that doesn’t come with strings or crossing over to the Eternal Realm. I don’t want to witness more death that I know is inevitable. I’m not sure I can survive watching Kate confront Braxus. I dread the moment he strikes, and she doesn’t get back up. I have faith she’ll take him down with her, but my deepest fear is that she can’t survive this. Look what it’s done to her so far. How many more lives will it take? I try to hang on to the good and moments of happiness, but I feel the clock ticking inside her. We’ll be moving to set up our camp soon. She knows it’ll be compromised. They are searching for every trace of us, which is easier in a world full of technology.”