Lamekis

by Charles de Fieux

  The Houcaïs and the Court were astonished at the wondrous change that had just happened to me. It was unanimously agreed that I was a Grouil-grou-gran and it was useless for me to defend my humanness. The order was given to send me here until my death. The Queen, who thought the prank was unforgivable, demanded that I be imprisoned here because in my story I emphasized how deep it was, hoping to heighten the horror and to illicit more and more sympathy for Clemelis’ imprisonment. The reason why she chose this for me was that since it was so deep, I would be less of a threat and seeing that I was possessed by the Bar-bu-fou, they could not take too many precautions.

  Whatever the case may be, they imprisoned me here like you see, but they probably won’t leave me here for long if they continue to think I’m a Grouil-grou-gran because, Lamekis, you know the law. There’s no appeal—after the gil-gan-gis I’ll have to die. And that will be the end of all my adventures. Oh Vilkonhis, why did you pull me out of the chaos just to make me so miserable?

  Zelimon unearthed

  Sinouis finished up there and started crying like a suckling calf. I did my best to comfort him. “You and I are in the same situation,” I said, “we’re on the same run and the Heavens are tired of our bad luck: they gave us back our old shapes and reunited us. That’s a sure sign that things are about to change. For myself, I have nothing but thanks to give as far as I can tell by what you just told me. I figure that Clemelis is back at the Court.”

  “Don’t kid yourself,” a voice came out of the closet. “All chained up as I am, Clemelis is still my slave and she won’t get out of it until I am free.”

  We trembled at these words. Who could have spoken them? I got up to find out. In spite of the weight of my chains, I dragged myself to the closet and what a shock! It was Zelimon whom I thought I had taken revenge on, whom I had bitten so many times and whom I thought was reduced to dust. Oh Heavens, always what you least expect, you neglect to anticipate. But what was I saying? Oh great Vilkonhis, aren’t you omnipotent? And when you decide on a miracle, who are we to doubt it?

  In spite of my growing rage at the sight of the traitor who kept giving me so much trouble, I thought I should hide it to try to find out what air Clemelis was breathing.

  “I’ll tell you about it,” he continued, “but it will do you no good. I’ll say nothing you want to hear. But it’s different for the adventure that kept me alive. It will upset you and that’s good enough for me tell it.

  “Know, then, that I pretended to die, but I didn’t. I saw the awful risk I was taking, but I had to try. I was very lucky to be wearing the cuirass otherwise your rage would have completely annihilated me. All this surprises you, but it’s nothing compare to what came next. Stick out your tongue, Lamekis, I’m going to strike you with blows as deadly as you thought you’d struck me. I heard everything and judging by the story of your Sinouis, you were thinking that Clemelis had not given in to my advances. Don’t believe it, Lamekis. I possessed the treasure that you are so jealous of. I admit that it was to you that she gave in, but what does it matter? I enjoyed it all the same. Don’t be fooled by assurances to the contrary—a woman would never confess such deeds. That’s the truth. Believe it if you want.”

  The way the villain told me this so succinctly affected me and threw me in a rage. “Well, Sinouis,” I turned to him, “what am I think of your story?”

  “That Zelimon is a wretch,” he replied, “worthy of the most horrible punishments. He knows very well that he has to die and his black soul wants to drag down all his enemies in its wake. Could it be that you still dare to doubt the wisdom of your most respectable wife? After getting back your original form? Isn’t this decisive and convincing proof in her favor?”

  There was nothing to say to that and it calmed me down, but it did not remove the worries I had about Clemelis’ fate. Zelimon seemed so wicked and not so very scared of death that I had reason to believe that he would die without ever saying what he did with her. Sinouis felt likewise and the traitor did not stop telling me the same thing.

  Later we learned from him how he had dealt with the orders that the Houcaïs pronounced against him. He said everything could devastate us. One of his people had met the fleeing hunter and had informed him right away. He said he had no doubt that the servant had met with Clemelis, was won over and was going to tell everything at the Court. Considering what might come up, the first thing he did was to check on Clemelis, transfer her that very night from her prison to another and hide himself at a reliable friend’s house. But since he was a wretch, his friend was like him and to get in good with the King he gave him up to an officer sent from the Court to arrest him. He was sure that he was going to die, so he swore and blasphemed to high heaven that Clemelis and us would all die with him.

  If we were at all able to take revenge on this villain, we would have killed him on the spot. But we were chained in such a way that it was impossible for us to follow our instinct.

  The orders from the Court should have arrived any day to decide our fate. They finally came and we were taken to the capital to be handed over to the law for our trial. Zelimon was pardoned on behalf of his father’s rank and the urgent appeals of his friends. They let him go on the condition that he bring Clemelis to the Queen and he acquiesced when he learned that Sinouis and I were bound to die in spite of our innocence. We were foreigners. That was enough for everyone to abandon us. Besides, to save the villainous Zelimon we had to be found guilty. All they had to do was to declare us Grouil-grou-gran and possessed by the Bar-bu-fou; there was no pardon and we had no hope.

  Sinouis and I waited in a dungeon until they took us out to give us the gil-gan-gis and so to torture. We were helping each other to resign to the divine decrees when the officer who was transferring us came up and was very polite, which was a good omen for us. “Don’t worry,” he said, “on my word you have a strong lawyer in Clemelis. She brought the Queen along to ask the King to pardon you. He promised to grant it provided that you prove that you are innocent of being Grouil-grou-gran.”

  We breathed easier at this good news. “Praise be to Vilkonhis,” Sinouis shouted. “If we’re going to appear before the Houcaïs, we have nothing to fear. Innocence will glory and crime will grumble.”

  “Clemelis is alive and free,” I said, “that’s enough for me. I have nothing more to fear.”

  We were transferred to a room that was as pleasant as the last was glum. “Wait here for new orders,” the officer said. “If the King wasn’t sunk in melancholy, you would appear before him today, but it shouldn’t be long. While waiting, pray to the Heavens to take away the cause of the King’s grief.”

  I asked the gentleman if it wasn’t indiscrete to fill us in on the reasons for the Houcaïs’ affliction. “They’re quite reasonable,” he said to me. “No one better than you knows Falbao, the wonderful dog who was given to the King, who saved his life so many times and has never left his side…”

  “Wait!” I interjected. “Has some sinister accident befallen him?” I was as desperate and grief-stricken as the King. Besides the fact that I, too, loved this tender dog, I knew how he felt because of what happened to my friendly animal294 and how sore these kinds of losses are.

  “Thank the Heavens,” the officer continued, “that Falbao is not dead. The Houcaïs would die himself. No, Lamekis, he lives, but has lately fallen into a lethargy that they fear is the beginning of the end. The King has summoned all the doctors of the kingdom, but not a one of them so far has been able to heal him. All agree on the cause of the sickness (it’s lethargy), but no one can cure it. Only one, an Ethiopian, guarantees that the skin of a snake from the South Pole can cure him. But at the same time he agrees on how difficult it would be to get it and that has caused the King great worry and fear. The Court, who loves him, shares his fright, but no one now is willing to prove his respect and affection at the price of his blood.”

  While the officer was telling us all this, I had an idea that turned out to be fruitful. I remembe
red, when I was changed into a snake and cast onto Earth, that I was near one of the poles, but I could not remember which one it was. The affliction of my transformation had erased part of my memory. Nevertheless, I was risking nothing by offering to heal Falbao. My snake’s skin still hung onto my body and was so extraordinary that it might have the necessary power for the cure. I told the officer my idea and he thought it feasible. We left to report it, telling ourselves that if I healed Falbao, I would rise from the depths of misfortune to the heights of favor. Sinouis felt the same and broke laughing hilariously at the idea of seeing a near end to his misfortunes. “So!” he cried out. “I’ll still be able to enjoy life? Ah, Lamekis, is there any greater good? Isn’t the grave frightening? And so, can I imagine that I will see my home again after being gone for so long? Oh father and mother, will you recognize your poor son? Won’t his dreadful owl’s beak scare you?” This thought saddened him for a moment, but the next melted his sadness. Never were we so weak and so attached to life: I had waged war on it and he accepted in good faith.

  I was expecting to see Clemelis again at any moment. The idea of delighting in her yearned-for presence enraptured me. At last she appeared. How could I describe how I felt? She was accompanied by Milkhea. Our reunion was long; hugs and kisses exchanged with laughter and tears again and again—we could not stop. “Oh my dear husband, is it really you at last?”

  “Oh my dear Clemelis, you’ve been given back to me! Are you faithful to me?”

  “Oh my son!”

  “Oh my mother!”

  “How happy we are!” Those were the only things we could find to say. Our emotions did the rest. There was no end to our outpourings.

  Lodaï, the chief minister, who held the highest rank in the empire with Boldeon, came to put some order in our reunion. He hugged me tightly and after showing me his joy at seeing me again, he took me aside and asked me if I was really sure that my snake’s skin was powerful enough to heal Falbao. I answered him that even without being totally certain, I had a lot of faith in it. “If the cure is as strong as your trust in it,” he said, “by saving yourself, you’ll save everyone. Falbao is a lot worse this evening. The Houcaïs is in tears and the whole Court is suffering. We shouldn’t wait any longer to cure him. The Monarch wants me to take you to his room. He still thinks you’re a Grouil-grou-gran, but he pardons you on behalf of the Queen, Clemelis and all those concerned with your fate. As for your Sinouis, he will obey the law: if he doesn’t prove his innocence, I fear for his fate. His owl’s beak is decisive. I don’t know how he will be able to defend himself against an accusation with such convincing proofs. As a friend I advise you to abandon him. The King wants it and between us, he’s right.”

  Sinouis did not miss a word of our conversation and screamed out in fear of his imminent arrest. He ran up to Lodaï. “Really,” he cried, “truly, honestly and sincerely, I’m not a Grouil-grou-gran. If my poor nose is guilty, cut it off. I’m ready for the most heinous punishments.”

  Lodaï motioned for him to leave. “He was a Grouil-grou-gran when he dropped out of his mother’s belly and he will be one when he drops into the grave. This unlucky friendship has plunged you into tragedy and you will only be really happy when he has suffered the severity of the law.”295

  The minister was obstinate in his opinion and did not give me time to respond. He led me straight to the Houcaïs. I pitied him in his present state: he was crying bucketfuls and clasping Falbao tightly in his arms. Falbao’s dying eyes presaged his near future. The King motioned me to approach, put one hand on my knee and showed me Falbao with the other. The Queen and the whole Court encouraged me. I did the same and whistled at the King. He gave me permission to speak, so I asked if I could touch Falbao. It was granted. I put my hand on the friendly animal’s head. His eyes opened and stared fixedly at me; he wagged his tail and showed that he recognized me. The Houcaïs was surprised and said aloud that the reaction boded well—it had been a long time since he had done as much. But if this surprised him, it was nothing compared to what happened next. Falbao, who had stopped staring at me, suddenly lifted his head, stuck his nose out and sniffed me all over. Then even more suddenly he got up and jumped on me. I was almost thrown backward.

  The King cried out in joy, “Ha! Falbao is saved!”

  I had no doubt that my snake’s skin was the secret cause of the marvel. With this in mind I took off my clothes and stood there naked. The wonderful dog no sooner saw the skin than he grabbed it with his teeth and greedily gobbled it up.

  The Queen and the ladies, who took a strange pleasure in this spectacle, all asked me at the same time how I came to possess such a precious, miraculous treasure and if it was easy to find skins with virtues like this. The Houcaïs, in his joy at seeing Falbao back on his feet (his bowing and jumping proved his total recovery), cried out that he owed his life to me and he would grant me anything I asked.

  “Two things,” I answered instantly. “The pardon of a friend accused of being a Grouil-grou-gran, but is not; and the punishment of that wicked Zelimon.” They were both granted. Besides this the Houcaïs named me his chief Bilthou-car296 and I was greeted as such right away.

  Before leaving the King to go into the room assigned to me, I begged him to allow Sinouis to defend himself in his presence and before the whole Court. It was granted. They sent for him and barely had he entered the room when Falbao jumped on him and ripped away his owl’s beak. The King spanked himself at this sight and we all did the same, but an even more wondrous event froze us all in terror. The owl’s beak that Falbao had thrown on the ground immediately started spinning around, stretching out and growing taller until there suddenly appeared before us the figure of a man.

  “Greetings, Houcaïs. Greetings, Lamekis. Scealgalis be praised forever. I am the philosopher Dehahal (I had already recognized him), come to announce to you a never-ending happiness. Lamekis would have been granted immortality if he had asked to forgive his cruel enemy Zelimon. Know, then,” he turned to me, “that there is more glory in forgiving than in punishing.” With that he disappeared.

  We were all flabbergasted by this wonder when Boldeon entered and threw himself at my feet. “Oh Lamekis,” he cried, “have pity on my poor son. Give him back his original form and after that you can do what you want with him.”

  I did not understand what he was saying. Later we learned that Zelimon had been transformed into an owl, the most hideous kind you can imagine. In spite of Dehahal’s advice, I held onto my bitterness and secretly rejoiced. I decided that if the Heavens made me master of the traitor’s fate, I would never turn him back to the way he was before.

  Conclusion

  Oh you mortals, for whom I tried to write my story, forever bless the Creator of the Universe and thank him with me for all the graces that he gave me. I have ruled this great kingdom for a long time and my rule has been mild and peaceful. I wage war to make a lasting peace. Without pretending to have the mysterious marks of a great politician, my works have proved that those of my predecessors were but shadows of mine. The kingdom of the Abdalles under my ministry has become an ocean that all the other seas and rivers of the Earth empty into. Without using violence I brought down pride, suppressed reckless opulence, cut off useless members and uprooted forever the shrubs of future rebellion. Under my reign the Kings of the Abdalles have truly become Kings. Blessed be the Almighty forever. It is he who has performed these miracles. I am only lucky to be his instrument and I will be glorified forever for this.

  APPENDIX

  Preface to Part 3

  The welcome that the public has given to the first two parts of this work makes me hope that the rest will be received with the same gratitude. The design is so new and the fiction so extraordinarily elaborate that I can confidently assume that it will receive the same honor.

  I will not take the time here to answer a number of letters that have been written on the matter, for example that they see a hidden purpose that I never dreamed of. A number of pe
ople who have done me the honor of reading my book have spent their time paying attention only to this. I can say with the utmost sincerity that my works are as virtuous as they are entertaining and I have always kept my writings far from that dangerous venom that some books are infected with only to slip in some ambiguous reference to the state or religion. Anything like this is absolutely foreign to my way of thinking. I respected everything that is forbidden. A few critics will no doubt take issue with this statement, but I do not think my reputation will change. I would rather be praised for simplicity than make a name for myself among those detestable conspiracies whose only satisfaction is in this frivolous benefit. Peace is on the side of a subject who is submissive to the civil laws; anxiety belongs to those other minds that rear up only to get famous for kicking against authority.

  But let’s get back to Part 3. I think I should advise the readers to skip the notes the first time through. The subject itself is so abstract and calls for so much attention that it should be read through without stopping. I will advise them, too, that one reading will not be enough to understand the matters that are dealt with.

  Everything here is mystery and secret. It is only with constant attention that one can manage to find the key. If any reader is fortunate enough to succeed, I beg them to please communicate it to me—I lost it a long time ago and would be ever so happy to find it again.

  I think I should also state that this work bears the sacred talisman of the most mysterious cabal. If my readers wish to take me at my word, they will never leave their houses without this wonderful book in their hands. It will keep them from harm, bestow wealth, prevent unwanted or unpredictable accidents, give spirit to those without any and tone down those with too much. But its greatest attribute is to give peace to the soul and a lot of money when there is real need. It is an incontestable fact and cannot be doubted.