Thin Ice

by Renée Jaggér

  Ronan brought out his cell phone and started dialing.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Calling my mother.”

  “Why her? I thought you two had an agreement?”

  “This is bigger than any agreement I have with my mother,” Ronan said. “I told you, if something were to happen to me, she’d be obligated to go to war. I need to tell her what we know so she can work with the vampires to bring Jax in.”

  I slid out of bed and put my hand over his phone, halting his dialing. “You can’t tell her, Ronan! Not yet. Please, you’ve got to let me talk to Jax. Reason with him. If you bring in the fae courts and the vampire higher-ups, they’ll kill him.”

  Ronan frowned and lowered his phone. “If what you say is true, he’s been trying to kill me for the last week and maybe longer.”

  “We’re not at war yet. It doesn’t have to be ‘kill or be killed,’ Ronan. Please. Jax is a good person in a bad situation. Please let me try.”

  He sighed and pressed his lips together, studying the wall behind me in thought.

  I bit my lip nervously. No matter what Ronan decided, I wasn’t going to let them kill Jax. If he was trying to take out Ronan, it was because someone had hired him to do it. He had said he was doing freelance work. Maybe that was his way of admitting he was working as a gun for hire. Whatever the case, my gut said Jax wasn’t the mastermind behind this. Someone else was bankrolling the operation and Jax was just caught in the middle, trying to do what he thought he had to. That was why he’d warned me away from Ronan. I also thought maybe he was the one who’d taken the shot in the parking garage. If he had, that was all the proof I needed to know Jax wasn’t a murderous madman who needed to die.

  “I can give you forty-eight hours,” Ronan told me.

  I almost melted in relief.

  “After that,” he continued, “there won’t be anything I can do. I’m obligated to report this as part of her court. I can stall for a little while, but if she confronts me directly, I have to tell her.”

  “I understand.” I returned to my bed and retrieved my phone, opening the email app to send a hasty message. I just hoped Jax was still willing to meet. He’d said he was leaving town. Maybe if I told him it was important? No, that wouldn’t be enough. I needed something that would cause him to drop everything and fly to Columbus to meet me, and there was only one thing Jax cared about enough to do that.

  My fingers moved over the phone, quickly tapping out the email.

  Hey, Jax. You were right about Ronan. I need your help. Can we meet same place, same time tonight?

  I sent the email. I’d be pushing it for time, knowing we still had to fly east and lose a few hours to time zones, but if I got discharged before lunch, I could make it.

  Jax’s reply came a few minutes later, faster than I anticipated. See you there.

  “The meeting’s on,” I told Ronan, lowering my phone. “But I need to be back in Columbus before six. If I’m late, he’ll get spooked and walk.”

  Ronan pushed up from the sofa. “I’ll go see if I can push the discharge paperwork along a little faster.”

  He left the room and I collapsed against the bed, staring at the ceiling. I’d never considered myself particularly devout, but if ever there was a time to mutter a prayer for luck, it was now.

  Chapter Twenty

  The bar was more crowded than it had been the first time I met Jax. There wasn’t a game on the television either, but they were showing the news and the weather. Typical evening television. Most everyone was drowning it out with their chatter and their beers.

  Jax, however, was in his usual spot, focused on the anchor, who was covering a double homicide on the west side. I stood off to the side in the shadows near the door, watching him for a few minutes. Even knowing what’d happened to him, it was hard to accept that my friend was a vampire. I supposed that accounted for some of his difficulty integrating back into regular society. Not only did he have the normal slew of vet problems when he came back, but he’d also been grappling with a hunger for blood alongside everything else.

  He must’ve felt so alone, I thought. Uncle Sam didn’t have a transition guide for vampires. How many people had he killed to feed his hunger? How often did he need to eat? How much in control of his darker nature was he?

  Jax had nearly let his temper get the best of him the last time we’d met. I’d known he was acting out of sorts, but I hadn’t realized how close to a bloodbath I’d been. If I’d pushed him a little harder, would he have snapped and shown his true nature? I would have to be very careful about how I approached our conversation tonight.

  I waited for a lull in the music to go over to him.

  “Surprised to hear from you so soon,” Jax said without turning his attention away from the television. “You seemed pretty smitten with your new job.”

  “Things aren’t always as they appear.” I slid onto the stool. Instead of ordering my normal beer, I opted for a Coke. I knew my stomach could handle that, but beer would be a gamble.

  Jax lowered his bottle. “You look pale.”

  “I’ve been sick.” I considered how much to tell him and then decided to throw caution to the wind. This wasn’t some monster. This was Jax. I had to treat him like the man I knew was still in there somewhere. Otherwise, what was the point? I turned in my seat to face him, folding my hands in my lap. “Actually, I just got out of the hospital.”

  “Yeah? What for?”

  “Iron poisoning.”

  Jax’s whole body went rigid, but he still didn’t look at me.

  “Of course, if I hadn’t been testing Ronan’s food, he would’ve drunk that smoothie you slipped him. Since he’s full fae and not half like me, he’d be dead. What happened, Jax? Did you decide the gun was too risky after you missed the first shot?”

  He turned his head slowly to regard me, admitting nothing.

  I decided to press the issue from a different direction. “How long have you been a vampire?”

  Jax snorted. “How do you know about that?”

  “Was it in Iraq?”

  He turned away.

  “Come on, Jax. I was there. I saw the bodies. I saw what happened to you. You shouldn’t have survived. It was always a mystery how you did.

  Jax’s lips tipped up into an uneasy smile. “I didn’t think I would, you know? Even after, when I got home, nothing was the same. The world had changed. I’d changed. There was nowhere I belonged. Not even the vet groups I joined helped. They didn’t understand the hunger. You can’t imagine what it was like, living with that.”

  I tried to imagine it, but he was right. I couldn’t wrap my mind around what it was like to be in his shoes. Oh, I could picture it, but even with as many details as I could provide, I couldn’t recreate the loneliness, the confusion, and the hunger he was talking about. “Have you killed anyone, Jax?”

  “What do you think?” He picked up his beer and chugged it before dropping it heavily back on the bar. “What choice did I have? It wasn’t like being a vampire came with an instruction manual. I had to figure it out for myself. I tried to resist, but you can’t. If you go too long without feeding, the hunger just takes over. It makes you kill. After the first time, I figured there wasn’t any point in trying to stop myself. I thought for a long time the police would find me, put me in jail. At least then, I’d get three square meals and a roof. Spent the better part of eight months hiding and looking over my shoulder. I knew how. Hiding, tracking, surviving at all costs… Even killing. We were outfitted to be what I became, except when I needed help, they told me to shut my trap and sent me home.”

  “Your wife, did she know?”

  Jax threw his head back and let out a bitter laugh. “I doubt it. She wasn’t creative enough to make that assumption. Oh, she knew I’d changed. She knew I was stronger, faster, and meaner, but she was gone long before I could show her who and what I really was.”

  “You don’t have to be a killer, Jax. You can still choose a differe
nt path.”

  He laughed again and gestured for the bartender to bring another beer. “That’s where you’re wrong, Callie. This is who I am now. There’s no other way for me to be. Don’t you get it? I’m a predator, a killer. There’s no going back for me.”

  I studied Jax’s face and his body language. He seemed to believe what he was saying, but I didn’t buy it. The Jax I knew had to be in there somewhere. All I had to do was figure out how to reach him. “What about outside the club the other night? That was you, wasn’t it? In the parking garage?”

  The bartender set another beer down in front of Jax and popped off the cap. He gave me a look, silently asking if I needed anything, but I shook my head, and he scurried off to the other end of the bar.

  “Leave it alone, Callie,” Jax said and picked up the beer to take a long pull.

  I put my arm on the bar and leaned toward him. “Why were you tailing me? Protecting me? Why warn me about Ronan if you didn’t care?”

  He ignored me, pretending to examine the beer bottle.

  I grabbed the bottle and slammed it on the bar so hard, I was surprised it didn’t break. “Stop bullshitting me, Jax! You can’t save my life and then act like you don’t give a shit! There’s still some part of you that does give a damn about right and wrong. Drop this job against Ronan. We can talk about the rest.”

  He smiled at the ceiling and shook his head. “Talk it out. Why does every damn person want me to talk out my problems? As if a friendly chat with a licensed therapist somewhere is suddenly going to make my bloodlust and fangs go away.” He turned to glare at me, the look so sharp I flinched. “You don’t get it, Callie. People like you never will.”

  “People like me?”

  “Sheep,” Jax clarified. “You live by taking handouts from your betters, never aspiring to be anything more. Well, you can keep on taking orders from your precious pretty-boy boss if you want. I’m not going to step aside just because you’ve involved yourself. You know the stakes. Walk if you want, or don’t. I’m done trying to help you.” He stood as if to leave.

  I jumped up and got in his way. “Who hired you to kill Ronan?”

  Several heads turned, having heard my accusation. If I kept pushing, maybe someone would call the police, and they’d hold Jax. I could get the cops to arrest him for attempted murder. There had to be enough evidence, right? Probably not. Vaughn seemed like the sort of person who could make criminal charges go away if he greased the right palms, and I wouldn’t put it past the other vampires either.

  Jax tried to sidestep me. I put a hand on his chest and stood in his way.

  “Move,” he barked.

  “You two, take it outside,” the bartender shouted. “Don’t make me get Security.”

  I ignored the bartender and kept moving into Jax’s way every time he tried to step around me. He was a good head and shoulders taller than I was, and I was sure he could take me in a fight, considering he had fangs, super speed, and super strength, and I was unarmed. That didn’t mean I was going to back down. I had to get through to him.

  “Was it Vaughn Meyer?”

  Jax rolled his eyes, turned quickly, and started for a side exit.

  I chased after him. “It was him, wasn’t it? Why? Does he want a war?”

  He suddenly stopped and whirled to face me. “For the first time since I’ve been back, I have a family, Callie. A place where I belong. They’ve never asked anything of me until this, and it’s the most important job they’ve ever given me. I’m not going to let them down just because you like your cushy new job.”

  “It’s not about that, Jax. It’s about doing what’s right.” I spied Security moving away from the opposite doors, pushing through the crowd and heading our way. I was running out of time. “A war will hurt everyone.”

  His expression hardened. “We’re soldiers, Callie. War is our profession. You might’ve forgotten that, but I haven’t.”

  Security reached us, two big guys with shaved heads and USMC t-shirts. “Gonna have to ask you two to leave.”

  “We were just going.” Jax took a step forward.

  I knew it was pointless, but the only thought in my head at that moment was to stop him. If I let Jax walk out of that bar, I was letting him throw his life away. Ronan would call his mother, and either the fae or the vampires would kill him. There’d be nothing more I could do to save him.

  I pulled my fist back and hit him with a sucker punch right in the mouth. Jax’s head jerked to the side, and I waited for Security to grab me and escort me out. For someone else to step in on his behalf. For anything to happen. For a beat, nothing did. Then Jax turned back to me, his eyes blood-red and his fangs showing for all to see.

  “Holy shit,” muttered some nearby patrons as they took a step back.

  One of the bouncers grabbed Jax, while the other moved to take me by the arm. Jax spun on him, grabbed the big man’s wrist, and yanked him forward, throwing him off balance and exposing his neck.

  “No, Jax!” I shouted, but I was too late.

  Jax bit into the bouncer’s neck.

  The bar patrons closest to us screamed and stumbled away, racing toward the exit. The bouncer who was supposed to escort me out gave up and ran for the closest door. Chaos erupted in the bar while Jax drained the life from an innocent man as if he were trying to prove his point.

  Maybe he was right and he was beyond saving.

  I’d failed to reach my friend. No, more than that, the laughing, joking soldier who I’d once called my brother was gone, and in his place was a terrible monster who didn’t want to be saved.

  I took a step back. Every instinct in my body screamed I should run. Jax was dangerous and he’d be coming for me next, but I couldn’t convince myself to move.

  He dropped the bouncer’s lifeless body to the floor and turned to hiss at me, blood still dripping from his fangs. I was certain he was going to attack me next, but the sound of a shotgun chambering a pair of shells echoed through the bar behind him.

  “I don’t know what the hell you are,” spat the bartender, “but you’d best get out of my bar.” He aimed the gun straight at Jax.

  Jax crouched, preparing to jump the bartender, but froze when he heard sirens closing in. He hissed at me one more time before shoving me aside and running through the door into the parking lot, practically tearing the door from its hinges on his way out.

  I ran into the dark parking lot after him, hoping to find him and stop him before he could hurt anyone else, but the lot was empty. Only a few cars remained. I searched between them, but there was no sign of Jax. Wherever he’d gone, I was sure I hadn’t seen the last of him. He wasn’t going to give up hunting Ronan.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  I drove back to the loft, more pissed off than anything. The drive was a blur, and I was still on an adrenaline high when I came through the door. It was late, but not late enough that Sam would be in bed. I didn’t bother trying to be quiet as I headed for the freezer in search of ice. My knuckles had turned a nice purple color and begun to throb from where they’d connected with Jax’s face. Stubborn bastard had one hard head. We were out of ice, so I settled for a bag of frozen peas. Just how long had those been in our freezer anyway?

  I dropped the frozen peas onto my fist and leaned against the counter with a sigh.

  Sam emerged from their bedroom wearing a white tank top, lowrider jeans that left the top of their boxers visible, and a sideways ballcap. It was what I’d always called Sam’s Bieber Breakdown look. “What the hell happened to you?”

  “Would you believe me if I said I was in a bar fight?”

  Sam looked me up and down. “You? Boring, well-behaved Callie Hart was in a bar fight?” They snorted. “I’d hate to see what the other guy looks like.” Sam opened the fridge and got out a beer.

  He’s fine. More than fine. He’s probably out there right now eating some poor bastard, I thought but didn’t say it out loud. Not only that, but he knows where I live. I studied Sam for a minute,
drinking their beer in peace. At any minute, a vampire could knock down our door, sweep into the place, and tear out Sam’s throat. There’d be nothing I could do about it, especially if I wasn’t there.

  I lifted the peas and sighed at my bruised knuckles. They’d be a nice shade of purple in the morning and swollen. “Sam, there’s something you should know. My fight at the bar was work-related.”

  “Your boss lets you drink on the job?”

  “No, it’s…” My voice trailed off as I considered how to break it to them. It might be too much to ask Sam to believe in vampires, but maybe I could make them see the danger another way. “Someone’s been trying to kill Ronan. They’ve tried a couple of times and almost succeeded. Shot at him once and then tried poison, which I got by mistake.”

  “Holy shit! That’s intense!” Sam lowered their beer and blinked. “Callie, are you okay?”

  I shook my head. “I almost died. It was mostly luck I didn’t.” And my weird genetics, I thought but left that out too. “But this job—it’s more dangerous than I thought it would be, and maybe not just for me. The people who are after Ronan know my face. They know where I live. They could come here, Sam. I don’t think you’re safe.”

  Sam dismissed it with a shrug. “There’s building security here. Cameras and a doorman. We also live several floors up. Nobody’s going to be climbing through our windows unless they can fly.”

  “These people don’t have to climb through windows to get to you, Sam.” I tossed the quickly defrosting bag of peas on the counter. “They could grab you off the street when you’re getting a coffee or break in and wait for you to come home. They can be anywhere at any time, and you wouldn’t know it.”

  Sam shrugged again. “So I’ll get some pepper spray and have Campus Security walk me to my car. Hell, you can pick me up from class if you’re so worried about me. I don’t think anyone on campus would be stupid enough to pick a fight with you.”