Juntto

by Michael Todd

  Decadence? Like donuts? That’s worked on one woman I know.

  Donuts keep me going, bitch. There’s nothing weak about me. Besides, Juntto has a lot to learn. He hasn’t been here in a long time. Just as I figured he would be, he wasn’t too impressed with the people so far. We’ve just got to focus on the extras.

  Katie heard a bump in the bathroom. And when he gets hooked on decadence, that means he’ll stop trying to take over the world?

  Pandora cackled. Oh, hell no. That man and conquering are like two peas in a pod. That is pretty much the point of his existence.

  Great.

  Pandora smirked. It’s not as bad as you think. It’ll take a while before he figures out his next plan. Who knows? We might all get killed, and then all bets are off anyway.

  Katie scoffed, rubbing her face. Great, I kick the bucket, and he’s good to go. My parting gift to Earth is a bloodthirsty spear-loving Viking with no conscience.

  Seriously, the real threat are his food intake and his liquor bill. Viking warriors are no joke.

  Katie shrugged. I’m loaded. Like, the money just keeps coming in. It’s not like it used to be.

  Pandora wasn’t convinced. You just think you are. That man can eat three times as much as me, and he pays no attention to it. If I were you, I’d…

  The bathroom door flew open, and Juntto came walking out with his shoulders squared and his chin chiseled. He was wearing a pair of white karate pants, no shoes, and a bandana tied around his head. He hadn’t been wearing that when he’d gone into the bathroom. Katie tilted her head to the side, realizing he looked like a young Jean-Claude Van Damme.

  Juntto turned in a circle and put his hands up with balled-up fists. “What you think? Good, no? Now I can kick demon ass in style. And I can even replicate the noise. Aaaayaaa.”

  Juntto kicked the headrest of the empty seat, knocking it off. He reached out and caught it, juggling it for a moment and then tossing it back into the seat. He looked at Katie with a guilty grin. “Sorry, I will replace.”

  Katie rolled her eyes. “As much as I appreciate your love of eighties and nineties cinema, you can’t go walking around looking like a famous person. That will draw more attention than anything else.”

  Juntto wrinkled his forehead. “What you want changed?”

  Katie put her hand to her chin and looked him up and down. “I want you to change your eyes to dark brown, your hair to another color entirely, and stand taller. It’s more intimidating.”

  He changed right in front of her, his hair going bright blond, his back straightening, and his eyes darkening. “Better?”

  Katie sighed. “Yeah, whatever. You didn’t have to lose the pants, though.”

  “You said you wanted intimidating.”

  “That’s sending the wrong signal.”

  Juntto clothed himself again and shrugged.

  Katie massaged her temples. “I just can’t win. I’ve got a shapeshifting action superhero on my damn team now. What’s next? Jackie Chan and Burt Reynolds?”

  Juntto laughed, then stopped. “Who are they again?”

  “Don’t worry about it. At least you’re good in a fight.”

  “And I’ve got dashing good looks.”

  Katie just blinked at him. “Oh, and humble.”

  2

  Angie grunted as she set down a large box of food and beer on the counter of one of the condos that Brock’s team would be staying in. She looked around the place, making sure that everything was okay. She had been working on it since Katie had left, trying to get everything in place. The guys would hopefully be staying for three days of relaxation before heading back to the base. Because of their hard work, Katie wanted to make sure they were comfortable and felt like they were at home.

  Angie started putting away the food for the fourth time. As she situated the beer in the fridge, her phone rang. “Angie’s Mortuary. You kill ‘em, I deal ’em.”

  Katie chuckled. “That’s gross, Angie. And who are you dealing them to? I need to know this, because they may need an ass kicking or two.”

  Angie shut the fridge door. “I never reveal my sources. What’s up?”

  “We’re landing, and I just wanted to find out how everything’s going.”

  Angie looked into the empty box. “Well, the rooms here are set up. They have lots of food, beer, cable, and the clothes you said you wanted me to get for everyone. Everything is pressed and put away in the closet.”

  Katie let out a sigh of relief. “Good. And how about the stuff for the base?”

  Angie grabbed her clipboard and flipped through it. “Three new beds, plus enough new linens for everyone in the base, check. Dishes and cookware to feed a multitude of people, check. Delivery of groceries to fill the kitchen, check. Then the little odds and ends I had shipped to them. Everything is accounted for, as far as what you asked me to send. Oh, and I ordered the new SUVs for the team, but they’ll take a couple of days. They should be there by the time the guys arrive, though.”

  “Excellent. You’re a gem. I feel like I can trust you with just about anything.”

  “Why do I feel like you’re going to drop something on me here?”

  Katie laughed. “Because I am, but I’ll talk to you about that when I get there. In the meantime, I need more stuff sent to the base. You got a pen?”

  Angie produced a fountain pen, seemingly out of thin air. “Always.”

  “Okay. I want a barbeque pit, the kind with a smoker attached. We’ll need several more fridges and deep freezers so that we can buy food in bulk. I’m thinking we can build another kitchen. We’ll need doubles of all appliances. Then get with Korbin and figure out what combat stuff we need to include for the guys. I want the whole shebang.”

  Angie scribbled it all down. “And we are paying for this?”

  “Good point. Get with the general on this one. Work out a budget with them, and we will cover the rest. If he has a problem with it, remind him we’re housing some of his guys, too. I’m pretty sure he won’t.” Katie hoped he wouldn’t, at least.

  Angie saluted the phone. “Ten-four, Captain. Now hurry up and get back here. You guys need some R & R.”

  Katie watched out the window of the SUV as they passed by the tall buildings of New York City. Pandora was in a good mood. Ahh, back home. And look, your human counterparts are starting to prepare for the fall season. Little decorations up everywhere. I don’t really understand why they don’t just leave them up all year round. Pumpkin spice themselves into comas.

  Then it’s not as exciting when the season comes. It’s only for a short period of time, so that makes it special. As far as pumpkin, I like it in my pie, and that’s about it. Katie stared at a Starbucks as they passed. The windows were plastered with pictures of different pumpkin spice products. Drinks, cookies, and more drinks.

  They pulled up in front of the condos and began to unload. Katie called to the guys, “Hey, stop in the lobby, okay? I want to just go over a couple of things with you.”

  Juntto trotted up next to her, and Katie rolled her eyes at his Jean-Claude Van Damme look. “You want to talk to me, too?”

  Katie nodded. “Yes, but upstairs. Just stand by the concierge’s desk, and I’ll be with you in a second.”

  “Concierge? Who’s that? That’s the little soldier over there?”

  “He’s not a soldier. He’s like…an assistant.”

  Juntto’s eyes sparkled. “A servant?”

  “No! He’s just a person you’re going to quietly stand next to. And for God’s sake, try not to touch anything, okay? As a matter of fact, don’t speak, touch, or do anything.”

  They walked through the doors. Juntto split off from the group and grumbled as he approached the desk. “Treats me like child. Damn angels in disguise.”

  The concierge beamed at him, “Can I help you?”

  “I’m not to speak to you, servant. You do the same. Avert your eyes from my glory.” The concierge waited for a moment, then realized the man who
looked a little like Jean-Claude Van Damme was serious. He looked away as casually as he could.

  Katie heard the exchange, but nobody was bleeding so she thought it had gone well. She did her best to ignore Juntto as she approached the soldiers. Brock gave her a smile she couldn’t help but return.

  “All right, boys, you have the same rooms as before, and the doorman will leave the keys with you as he takes you up. I just wanted to talk to you about something. I think it’s important for you to remember that Juntto was being Juntto.”

  Turner, Brock’s second, grumbled. “He did some terrible things, Katie.”

  “I’m not saying it’s okay, but I need you guys to give him a clean slate. Judge him by what he does in the present, not his past. Can we do that?”

  Brock turned to his men. “That we can. God knows not all of us have good pasts.”

  Eddie, a short soldier covered in tattoos, piped up, “I got one of those sold-drugs-in-high-school pasts, not murder-tons-of-people pasts.” His partner in crime Sean snorted laughter.

  “All right.” The tone in Brock’s voice shut them up. “Nonetheless. We’ll give him space to prove himself.”

  The guys nodded and grumbled agreement. Katie and Brock shared a brief look, then he took his men to the elevator.

  Katie let out a deep breath and turned to Juntto, waving her hand at him. He glared at the concierge for a moment, then followed her. The two of them entered the empty elevator and rode up to her floor. Katie watched him out of the corner of her eye. The Leviathan looked wildly at the elevator. “No elevators the last time you came here?”

  “Why have you put me in this prison?”

  “It’s moving. We’re going up.”

  “You have wings. We could fly. I wish to fly.” Juntto reached out to touch the glowing buttons, but Katie slapped his hand.

  “Just let it go, Juntto. You can’t just touch everything you don’t understand. You could blow yourself up.”

  He pulled his hand back quickly as the doors opened and marveled, “The prison was a portal to another world.”

  “No, idiot. We just went up a few stories.”

  Angie grinned as she met them in the hall smiling. “Hey, guys!”

  Katie hugged Angie briefly. She gestured to Juntto, who was carefully stepping out of the elevator. He suddenly jumped free and whirled on it as it dinged and the doors closed.

  “Juntto!” Katie gestured for him to join them. “This is Angie, my right hand. She’ll show you to your room.”

  “She’s your servant.”

  Together, Katie and Angie blurted, “No.”

  Katie grimaced. “She’s my friend. I am going to put my things down. Follow Angie. Respect her, or you’ll end up with another bullet in your dick. Get it?”

  Juntto shrugged. “Yeah, I got it.”

  Angie and Juntto watched as Katie disappeared into her apartment. Angie turned and gave Juntto her best smile. He eyed her suspiciously. She kept the smile as she walked him down to the condo across the hall. “This is going to be your place. There used to be someone else living here, but the owner decided to sell. They didn’t like the attention Katie was getting, and they were worried.”

  Juntto looked around the condo. “This is a palace. What could worry one who lived in this place?”

  Angie set her clipboard down on the table. “I’m assuming a demon invasion or something. Either way, I bought it at a reduced rate as an investment of sorts. We can use the privacy up here, and the condo will always sell for more than what we purchased it for.”

  “I see.” Juntto obviously did not see.

  Angie showed him into the living room, trying her best to treat him with respect and not fear. He turned to her and put his arms out. “I accept this palace. It is very pleasing to me.”

  Angie smiled and reached into her bag, pulling out a tablet. “Here. This is a computer—a tablet really. You press the little green, red, and yellow ball and then type whatever you’re looking for into the search bar. I’ve pulled up several tabs already. You just select what you want like this, okay? I need you to search for clothes that you like. Just go through the clothes and add them to the basket. I’ll take over when you’re done and purchase them for you.”

  Juntto wrinkled his nose. “This technology is strange.”

  Angie chuckled as she went to the kitchen counter and organized her notes. “It can be. And we will need to take you shopping in public before you leave, too.”

  Juntto plopped down on the overstuffed couch and grabbed the remote. “Ah! Some of this technology is coming to me.” He held it up and clicked on the large flat-screen television. His eyes roamed down to the flowered material under him as he ran his hand across it. “By Crtagul’s frozen tits, this furniture! Who in the world picked it out? Was it you?”

  Angie smirked. “The people I bought it from sold everything in the place except for their personal items. I left all the furniture and cleaned everything else out.”

  “I need a man’s chair. A throne of iron and wood.”

  “The couch is fine for now. There are sheets in the cabinet and on the bed, and the towels in the bedroom, and any other linens are all brand-new. There is also food in the fridge and beer and wine on the shelves. I wasn’t sure what you liked.”

  “Tequila.”

  “I’ll look into that. I got you soda and bottled water as well. This is your residence while you are here, and we should be good until you leave. Of course, if you run out of something, just let me know.”

  “Did you get him soap? The man needs some soap,” Katie called as she walked into the apartment. “He smells like a bear dipped in foot fungus.”

  Juntto leaned down with a furrowed brow and sniffed his armpits. “Hey, it’s not so bad.”

  Angie looked at Katie with a confused look and shook her head, walking out of the room. Katie glanced around the place, making sure everything was as it should be. She plucked the remote from his hand and clicked off the television.

  Juntto looked at her standing over him. “Do humans treat all of their prisoners in such a luxurious manner?”

  Katie scoffed. “No, you should see the prisons. But that doesn’t apply to you.”

  “True. I am your slave, correct?”

  “You are a vassal, not a slave. Pandora told me that I need to consider your type when I am deciding what to do with you. While you are here on Earth, we have Earth customs.”

  Juntto picked up a frilly pink throw pillow. “I see that.”

  Katie ignored him. “I’m willing to give you a very restricted second chance and accept your fealty. If you fuck it up, I’ll cut your head off, and we’ll see if you can grow it back.”

  Juntto pouted and sat back on the couch. “Such a bloodthirsty angel.”

  Katie shook her head. “No, just being real with you, Juntto. Regardless of whether I come to terms with what you are, you are exactly what we don’t want here: a bloodthirsty Leviathan with no conscience and a willingness to hurt anyone and everything you come across if it suits you. I accept your fealty, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be prepared for the worst. These people you see around me all the time? They aren’t slaves or servants, they are family. I will protect them and the other innocent humans with my life.”

  Juntto looked at her strangely, as if the idea were foreign to him. “Right. Well, I have clothes to pick out, and I would like to get caught up on my news. See which emperor is reigning supreme these days.”

  “Good luck with that.”

  Juntto grumbled and turned the television back on. “Thanks for the stuff.”

  Katie put her head down to hide the smirk. She walked to the door but stopped in the doorway. “Oh. You need to be ready by eight a.m. tomorrow. If you need help with an alarm, we can do that. Angie will pick you up. Your job is to get what she tells you that you need and make sure she is protected if she can’t handle a situation. She is not normally on the fighting side of the team. Most importantly, no killing unless they try to
kill either of you. You will be walking through crowded city streets filled with innocent beings. Here in the big cities, if we find ourselves in the middle of an attack, we instantly try to steer it away from the people. You should keep that in mind.”

  Juntto looked at her, bored. “Right. Do what the Angie lady tells me, don’t kill, and protect her. Got it.”

  “Right. Besides, killing involves paperwork, and I hate paperwork more than I hate most demons. Except for Moloch, of course.”

  Juntto grunted in agreement. “Yes. Fuck Moloch.” He thought for a moment, then studied the remote. He muted the television. “Wait. What is this paperwork?”

  Katie tapped her foot for a second and walked over, sitting on the coffee table in front of him. She leaned forward, putting her elbows on her knees as if she were going to tell him something secretive. “On Earth, we try to kill as few as possible, so they set up a system of penance. A punishment, almost. If you kill outside of an assignment, no matter who is in danger, you are sentenced to the desk.”

  Juntto oohed. “That doesn’t sound fun.”

  Katie nodded somberly, trying to keep a serious face. “No, it’s not. Suddenly, in front of you, there are hundreds, maybe even thousands, of forms to fill out. You write and rewrite what you saw, over and over again. You can’t stop until you are done, but you never really know when you are done. And you only get stale coffee and old donuts the entire time.”

  “No steak? No tequila?” Juntto’s eyes grew wide, and his lip quivered. “What fresh hell is that? It sounds like one of Lucifer’s creations.”

  Pandora was cackling inside Katie. Oh. Oh my God. This is the best thing ever. Tell him there’s a man who comes around and watches over your shoulder.

  Okay.

  Tell him the man watches and puts his dong on your shoulder until you’re done.

  I’m not saying that.

  C’mon! He hates being managed.

  Katie cleared her throat. “I’ve heard they got the idea from him. They have a slave driver known simply as ‘the Captain’ who comes around and watches over your shoulder. He doesn’t say a word, just reads every word you type.”