Gun Mage 4: Surviving a Post Apocalyptic Magic Earth

by Logan Jacobs

  We arrived at a pleasant little room that didn’t have an obvious purpose. There were a few armchairs in one corner, a dining table without chairs in another, and a collection of silk flowers in heaps around the room. At first, I thought the plants had simply been abandoned in the room, but then I spotted a few vases on a counter and a second glance at the plants revealed that they were organized by type and color.

  The room also had a second door, though it was neatly hidden. It was only when Tessa pressed a small crystal on a panel that I saw the slight crack between the edge of the door and the wall. The door swung open without a sound to reveal a well-lit and carpeted staircase that smelled of cinnamon. I could see framed pictures as well and hear a faint tinkling that reminded me of windchimes.

  “Oh, this is much nicer,” Darwin declared as he drew in a deep breath of the scented air.

  “There’s another panel at the bottom next to the door,” Tessa stated. “Just press that and the door will open.”

  “Thank you,” I said fervently as I shook her hand.

  Darwin and I stepped into the stairwell and the door closed silently behind us. We started down the stairs in our heavy, snow sodden boots, but not a single sound escaped the thick carpet. I could still hear the windchimes, though I had yet to figure out where the sound was coming from.

  “Much better,” Darwin sighed as he stopped to admire one of the pictures.

  The picture was of a woman with brown hair and brown clothing seated in front of a scene that looked vaguely like a town in the background. She looked ordinary enough, but there was something mysterious about her smile, like the two of us had just shared a great secret. Or maybe a great joke.

  “The Mona Lisa,” Darwin murmured as he studied the painting. “Not the original, but a pretty darn good copy.”

  “It’s a famous painting?” I asked.

  “Probably the most famous, at least in pre-magic times,” Darwin sighed. “Everyone knew this painting, even if they’d never seen it in person. There’s a lot of reasons why people talked about it, especially art historians, but I’ve personally always thought it was the smile that draws most people in.”

  “It’s really the only thing you notice,” I replied. “You can’t help but wonder what she’s smiling about.”

  “Exactly,” Darwin agreed.

  We admired the painting for a few more moments, then started down again. I started to pay more attention to the artwork, then stopped at another one that had caught my attention. It showed a train emerging from a fireplace, complete with the plume of smoke. Aside from the train, the fireplace and its surroundings were quite realistic, right down to the clock that sat on the mantelpiece.

  “Magritte, I think,” Darwin mused.

  “That’s what this one is called?” I asked as I tried to make sense of the scene.

  “Oh, no, sorry, that was the artist,” Darwin said quickly. “I don’t remember what the name of the painting is, but it’s definitely by Magritte.”

  “It’s so different from the Mona Lisa,” I noted.

  “Well, four hundred years will do that,” Darwin agreed.

  “They were painted four hundred years apart?” I asked. I still found it difficult sometimes to understand just how long humanity had been around before the meteorite hit.

  “That’s nothing,” Darwin snorted. “The Great Pyramids have both of these beat by a few thousand years.”

  “Do you ever wonder what the world would be like today if the meteorite hadn’t hit?” I asked.

  “All the time,” Darwin confessed. “But I can’t go back and change it, so I tell myself to forget it and move on whenever I start to get too depressed.”

  I stared at the painting for a few more moments, but we were near the end of the stairs, and Darwin was apparently feeling the need to move on and not get too depressed. He took a last look at the Magritte, then started down the last few steps without me. I shrugged, still not sure what the meaning was but intrigued nonetheless, and followed after the ex-trooper.

  We found the small crystal as promised and a soft touch opened the steel door. Like its mate upstairs, it opened without a sound to reveal a small fenced-in area surrounded by tall shrubs. The bushes were still thick with leaves despite the winter cold and served as an excellent shield against prying eyes. A small break in the fence line was the only exit, and after we’d squeezed through, we found ourselves just below the clock tower.

  We stopped long enough to orient ourselves, then picked our way through the snow toward the street. We could still hear a few chants from the front of the building, but the crowd size sounded considerably smaller. There were still plenty of uniforms, though, and a lot of weaponry on display.

  “Hope the girls had an easier time looking for a hat,” Darwin observed as we hopped over the snow piled up on the curb to wave down a passing carriage.

  “I’ll be happy to get mine back,” I admitted. “I didn’t realize how cold it was until I didn’t have it.”

  The carriage we’d spotted swerved over to the curb and sent a wave of icy slush along the sidewalk. Darwin and I both jumped back to avoid the worst of the spray, but we both had little rivulets of muddy water down our fronts.

  “Sorry about that,” the driver called out cheerfully. “Where to?”

  “The Green Parrot,” I replied as I brushed off what I could and climbed inside.

  Darwin followed me in, and we settled into the seats a mere second before the carriage jerked forward and joined the flow of traffic. This carriage wasn’t quite as nice as the one we’d ridden in before, probably because it was a good deal older. We bounced around in the back, but the seat cushions were thick enough to keep us from suffering too much damage. There were no books or mints, either, though someone had tried to spiff the place up by painting flowers and vines over the interior wood. It was cheerful, at least, and as the carriage left the desultory air of the Tower Block behind, the painting started to work its magic. I soon had Darwin trying to explain once again about the George Foreman grill and the burned foot, and we laughed all the way back to the Green Parrot.

  As we stepped out from the carriage, I spotted the two bays being led around the corner and pointed them out to Darwin. The older man nodded as he paid the driver, and then we started up the steps to the inn as the carriage pulled away in another splash of water.

  “Magda!” I declared cheerfully when I spotted the clerk at the desk.

  “Oh, hello,” Magda replied as she tried not to appear startled by our noisy entrance.

  “Hello!” Emma yelled out as well.

  “We just saw the horses being led to the stables,” I added.

  “Yes, your lady friends just returned a few minutes ago,” Magda quickly assured me. “They had several bags.”

  “So much for not buying a lot,” Darwin snorted.

  “They did say they would pick up supplies,” I pointed out.

  “Well, I guess we should go see what this new hat looks like,” Darwin sighed as we started to walk toward the stairs.

  “New hat!” Emma added. “Bring me biscuits!”

  I was still grinning as we arrived at the second floor landing and I turned toward my room. Darwin followed me, and I realized he was serious about checking up on Freya. I tried to look more serious as well as we made our way to the dark little hallway, though I kept hearing Emma’s voice insisting that we bring her biscuits. It was a struggle not to grin, and Darwin shot me more than one puzzled look as I swallowed a snicker or two.

  We squeezed down the hallway together, and I stopped in front of Freya’s room and knocked on the door. I could just hear the sound of voices from inside, but after I knocked, there was nothing but silence. A moment later, the door opened and Freya peeked out at us.

  “Oh,” Freya said in relief. “I thought you were the stableboy here to deliver yet another update on the horses.”

  “Did something happen to the horses?” I asked.

  “Absolutely nothing,” Freya
assured me as she opened the door to reveal Sorcha sitting on the edge of the bed, “but he wanted us to know that he’s taking very good care of them.”

  “He has a crush on Freya,” the Irish mage added.

  “Ugh,” Freya protested as she stepped back so Darwin and I could step into the room. “He’s just a kid.”

  “So are you,” Darwin replied as he walked over to the window and looked outside.

  “Well, how did it go?” Sorcha demanded. “Do we have passes?”

  “We do,” I assured her, “for all of us plus the horses and Barnaby.”

  “And what did you offer in return?” Freya asked as she sat down next to Sorcha.

  “We offered to help protect the train during the trip,” I replied.

  “With guns,” Darwin added when neither woman responded.

  “You… told him about the guns?” Sorcha gasped. “Are you insane?”

  “Hex showed the man the Colt revolver he was carrying,” Darwin explained.

  “Oh, that’s an interesting tactic,” Freya declared a few moments later. “Scare the heck out of the man you want to ask a favor.”

  “It got us the passes,” I pointed out. “And Joker Riley was definitely not scared. If anything, he looked excited.”

  “But he could be reporting you to the Magesterium even now,” Sorcha protested.

  “It wasn’t great, but I think Hex had the right read on the guy,” Darwin replied as he finally turned away from the window. “Joker Riley is too interested in the guns and the idea of hiring us on full-time to report us to the mages.”

  “He wants to hire us?” Freya snorted.

  “He said he would make an offer if things went well during this trip,” I explained.

  “You told him we were heading west, right?” Sorcha pressed.

  “Ye-es,” I stammered as I glanced at Darwin. “I did say that but he seemed to think he could make us a really good offer that would make us want to stay.”

  “No, thank you,” Freya said emphatically. “I’m not taking my chances in any more of these towns. From now on, I’m a rolling stone.”

  I glanced at Darwin again, but the old man shrugged and then smiled at his granddaughter. Sorcha caught the look I cast toward the older man, and gave me a raised eyebrow, but I didn’t want to discuss Darwin’s possible departure from our group until the ex-trooper had made up his mind. I shrugged as well and remained quiet, though I suspected Sorcha would corner me soon enough.

  “So, how about you?” Darwin asked. “Did you find a hat?”

  “Did I!” the rabbit woman declared as she bounced to her feet. “But first, thank you, Hex. I know you must have been cold outside without this.”

  I accepted the return of my own hat with a grin and plopped it onto my head. It felt good to have it back on, and the trace of Freya’s scent, something spiced and exotic, that still clung to it only added to my enjoyment.

  “I will never volunteer my hat again,” I said solemnly.

  “Hopefully, you won’t have to,” Freya replied as she opened the armoire and pulled out a box.

  The rabbit woman set the box on the bed, and with a flourish, pulled the lid from the box. The first hat she pulled out was made from a thick cotton that the woman at the store had assured them was waterproof. It had a wide brim, but snaps on either side of the crown meant the brim could be folded up when necessary. Freya had opted for one in a dusky green with a decorative maroon leather strap.

  “And best of all, I can fold it up and toss it into a bag and it won’t lose its shape,” Freya announced as she turned around so we could admire the hat from every angle.

  “It looks great,” I assured her.

  Darwin pulled the hat from her head when she stepped too close and studied it carefully. Freya watched impatiently as her grandfather picked at the stitching and rubbed a finger along the fabric.

  “This is a good hat,” Darwin conceded. “It should last forever.”

  “Thank you,” Freya said primly as she retrieved the hat and returned to the bed. “Now, for really cold weather, I have this one.”

  Freya pulled a second hat from the box, and I tried not to laugh when I saw it. It looked like a ball of gray fur, not unlike the color of Barnaby’s coat. The mutant pulled it on, then carefully tucked her hair and ears out of sight. Though it looked like some animal had wrapped itself around her head, I had to admit that it also looked warmer than anything I owned.

  “And I picked this one out just for you, gramps,” Freya continued.

  “Just for me?” Darwin asked in puzzlement as he stared at the fluffy hat.

  “It’s an antique,” Sorcha explained. “It’s from the pre-magic era. The woman said that even though it looks and feels like fur, it isn’t. She said they’re just as warm as real fur, but she’s had a hard time convincing her customers of that.”

  “Faux fur,” Darwin mused as Freya removed the hat and handed it to him. “They really could make fake fur that felt just like the real thing. This one is a good example of that. If you didn’t check the label, you’d never know it wasn’t fur.”

  “Will it keep her warm?” I asked.

  “Oh, absolutely,” Darwin said as he pulled the furry ball onto his own head. “Heck, I might even have to borrow this one.”

  “I really like it because I can tuck everything out of sight,” Freya said as Darwin turned to admire himself in the mirror that hung near the armoire.

  “I’d say you had a successful day, then,” I laughed.

  “And we haven’t even told you about the supplies we found,” the Irishwoman added.

  “That’s right,” Freya replied. “We’ve got food and medical supplies, some more fire sticks, and something called a compass.”

  “Oh, we could definitely use one of those,” Darwin declared. “I had my old boy scout one for years until your father dropped it into the lake during one of our early fishing trips after the meteorite hit.”

  “Yeah, dad might have mentioned that a time or two,” Freya noted. “I’m pretty sure you never let him forget it.”

  “We also picked up some special feed for the horses that’s supposed to keep fresh for a really long time,” the mage added. “And it all fits into a small little bag.”

  “Mmmm,” I said more skeptically. I’d seen similar miracle feeds advertised in almost every cow town I’d ever passed through, and I’d never seen one that was anything more than ordinary feed.

  “We also have special biscuits for Barnaby,” Freya added as she pulled a small cloth bag from the pile and passed it over to me. “Sort of a thank you for saving me from getting trampled.”

  “And what’s special about these?” I asked as I opened the bag and peered inside.

  “They taste good,” Freya said. “To dogs, anyway.”

  “They’re like mint candies for dogs instead of horses,” Sorcha added.

  I sniffed at the small round objects in the bag, but all I could detect was a vaguely fishy odor. I couldn’t see anything especially yummy about the hard pellets, and I wasn’t sure Barnaby would get all that excited about them, but at least Freya wasn’t so dead set against the dog’s presence anymore.

  “I’m sure he’ll be happy to have them,” I replied as I closed the bag.

  “So,” the ex-trooper declared, “a good day all around so far. Why don’t we head back to the tea room for some sandwiches and maybe some of those chips?”

  “I don’t know,” Freya said slowly. “There are all these restaurants nearby.”

  “Pffft,” Darwin snorted. “No one wants to go back outside right now. And besides, I want to let Viv know how things went.”

  “Oh, right, Viv,” the rabbit woman huffed as she rolled her eyes.

  “I think that’s a grand idea,” Sorcha interrupted.

  “So do I,” I replied. “Freya can show off one of her new hats, and we can thank Viv for her help. I should probably take Barnaby out real quick, but then I’ll meet you in the tea room.”


  Our plans set, I stepped across the hall to retrieve the Weimaraner. The dog was sitting by the window where he had a good view of some of the local squirrels. It was hard to believe that we’d been under attack from similar rodents just a few days before, and I shivered as I remembered being pelted with anything and everything the bushy tailed attackers could get their paws on.

  Barnaby hadn’t been with us then, and so he watched the scurrying creatures without a worry in the world. I set the bag of dog treats on the desk and peered out the window with him for several moments. When the novelty had worn off for me, I walked back to the door and whistled for the dog. The Weimaraner reluctantly gave up his position by the window and followed me slowly through the warren of hallways and then down the steps to the lobby.

  Neither of us wanted to spend much time outside as grey clouds began to fill the sky and the first flakes of snow started to fall once again. Barnaby tended to his business as quickly as he could, and then we scurried back to the inn and up the stairs to the room. Barnaby made a beeline for the bed, where he positioned himself in the exact center of the cover so he could stay warm and still watch the squirrels.

  “Don’t destroy anything,” I warned the dog as I stepped back into the hall.

  I found my way back to the tea room, where Freya and Sorcha sat with their heads together over two steaming cups of tea. Darwin was nowhere to be seen, and I wondered if he had gone in search of Viv.

  “I’m surprised you didn’t go with the big fur ball,” I said as I stepped to the table.

  Freya grinned at me from beneath the brim of her green hat and gave me a wink.

  “It was tempting, but I thought it might be a bit too warm to wear inside,” the mutant replied.

  “It’s also not the most inconspicuous hat one could wear,” Sorcha added as I sat down.

  “Why would you want to be inconspicuous?” I teased as I poured a cup of the tea.

  I sipped the tea, and while it was tasty, I was a bit disappointed that it wasn’t Viv’s special version.