“You. I want you.”
With a soft growl he kissed his way up her body, his fingers never leaving her slick folds, until he held himself over her. “Say it again. Tell me.”
“Please, Zac. I want you.”
He reached over and pulled a condom from the nightstand drawer, put it on, then removed her bra, leaving them both naked. “I want you too, Carmen. Are you sure?”
She nodded, and he lifted her hips, pulling her toward him as he thrust forward, filling her completely. Zac stilled, allowing her body to adjust to his. Moments later Carmen rocked forward, letting him know she needed more.
His expression intense, he set up a steady rhythm, his gaze locked with hers. “You feel so incredible. I thought I’d imagined it that first time. Thought it was impossible. But I was wrong. So wrong. You’re amazing.”
“So are you.”
Carmen met him thrust for thrust, giving herself over completely to this man, this moment, this time together. Sweat sheened his forehead as they both teetered on the brink of climax all too soon. His rough groans of mounting pleasure filled the air and her blood pounded in her veins. No matter what issues they had outside of this room, in bed they fit like two pieces of the same puzzle. She wanted this night to go on forever. She wanted him to bring her to orgasm before she couldn’t take it anymore.
Pressure built inside her, causing her to grind against him even harder, seeking her own fulfillment. Finally her passion crested, and her world exploded into ecstasy. Zac followed close behind her, his back arching as he thrust into her hard one last time and orgasmed.
Afterward, he collapsed on the bed, his eyes closed and his expression relaxed for the first time she’d seen all weekend. Carmen felt so limp she could barely move. Zac’s leg tangled with hers as she turned on her side and laid her hand on his chest.
The sweat on their skin chilled, and he pulled the covers over them, holding her close as she gave him a sleepy grin. “Guess that’ll teach me to get more strikes than you, huh?”
He chuckled, tucking her head under his chin. “Nah. I love having a worthy opponent.”
* * *
Zac wasn’t an idiot. He had known as soon as Carmen snuggled atop him and gave a huge contented sigh that he’d made a mistake taking her to bed again. Not because of their stupid fake engagement, but because this was a woman he respected. A woman who was a friend and a colleague. A woman who challenged him on every level.
A woman he could love.
Dammit.
He didn’t do love. Love meant trust. Love meant risk. After the disaster he’d witnessed in his parents’ relationship he never wanted to leave himself open to that kind of heartache and disappointment. This weekend should’ve been fun. Lighthearted. Low risk. Then he’d gone and opened up to her more than he should have and they’d connected on a deeper level. Now, he’d let her into his life and his heart in a way he’d never let anyone in a long, long time.
She wanted different things. She’d be moving away soon, if she got the job in California. She had a life and responsibilities of her own. Yet he couldn’t seem to stop himself from envisioning a future with them together. Working side by side at Anchorage Mercy, getting married, starting a family of their own.
Except there were still so many things she didn’t know about him—his family, his past...
He should have told her the truth before they slept together again, he knew that, but the time hadn’t seemed right. And then his body had taken over, and his brain had taken a back seat, and...ugh.
What a mess.
He stroked his fingers through Carmen’s curls, savoring their silky feel against his skin. Her hair twined around his hand, as if begging him to stay.
She propped herself up on her elbow to look at him, a slight frown marring her beautiful face. “What are you thinking about?”
Zac realized he had another opportunity at that moment—to let it go or talk about it.
Letting it go would lead to more sex.
Talking about his past would guarantee she wouldn’t want anything more to do with him.
She’d already made it clear she didn’t trust rich people—had no use for them at all after the way her own wealthy father had behaved and the way she’d been treated by those entitled frat boys who’d expected things from her when she’d worked at that luxury resort in Trinidad. Once she found out his father owned this resort, and many more like it, any relationship they might have had would be over.
Torn, Zac rolled onto his side to see her face-to-face. Right or wrong, he wanted them to have the rest of this night together. He’d tell her the truth about himself tomorrow. He would. And if it all fell apart then at least he’d have these precious memories to look back on.
“I’m glad we’re here together tonight.”
“Me too.”
She traced her finger down his chest, making him shiver.
“I feel like I can just be myself with you. I don’t have to impress you. You’re real—normal. Not like some of the men I’ve come across before. Most guys I’ve been out with either expected me to take care of them or tried to impress me with their money. But I don’t care about that. Wealth doesn’t make a man. I learned that lesson all too well with my father.”
Zac hid his wince. Yeah, he’d learned that with his father too.
“Although...” Carmen snorted and gestured to the suite around them. “All of this doesn’t suck.”
“True,” he said. “But this isn’t reality.”
“Tonight it is.” She gave him a sweet, sexy smile.
He wanted to forget—forget the lies and the past and just enjoy what time they had together here in their little private paradise of a bedroom—but he couldn’t.
“Hey, why so serious?” she asked. “We’re supposed to be basking in the afterglow.”
She nudged him with her shoulder and Zac forced a small smile.
“Listen.” She held his hand and toyed with his fingers. “I have no fantasies about money. I’ve seen the best and worst it can do and I’m careful. My mother and sister and I live frugally, and I don’t depend on others to give me what I need. If that’s a problem for you, then I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s not a problem, I just...” He exhaled slowly and held her closer. “Honestly, it makes me respect you even more.”
“Good.” She smiled. “A lot of men are threatened by an independent woman. I’m glad you’re not one of them.”
Zac couldn’t seem to look away from her. Carmen was gorgeous, no doubt. But now he also saw her inner strength and determination, her confidence and intelligence, and that made her even more beautiful. She worked hard and she deserved the best in life.
His heart squeezed tighter in his chest, and that was when he knew he was a goner—which only scared him more. Still, he pushed past the fear, because she deserved this moment even if he couldn’t give her forever. No matter how he might wish otherwise.
“Thank you.”
She took a deep breath. “For what?”
“For tonight. For being my friend. For everything.”
It didn’t cover even half of what he needed to say, the things he needed to tell her, but it was all he could do at the moment.
“You’re welcome.” She gave him a surprised smile, then raised a brow, the glint in her lovely eyes positively wicked. “You ready for round two?”
Zac felt the blood in his body divert southward. Yep, his heart was definitely a goner where this woman was concerned, and he was well and truly terrified.
He was also not moving out of this bed for anything in the world—not until he had no other choice. He leaned in and kissed her deeply. “More than ready.”
CHAPTER NINE
ZAC WAS UP before Carmen the next morning. Which was good, because if she’d rolled over and smiled at him he’d never have wanted to leave her side. And he needed
to go. Needed to get some space and clear his mind.
The fact was, last night was messing with his head. This was supposed to be a fun weekend. No commitments. No strings attached. And while it had certainly been fun, feelings were stirring inside him. Feelings that shouldn’t be there—tenderness, longing, satisfaction, sweetness. Feelings beyond like and nearing...
No. He wasn’t going there.
They were friends. Good friends. Friends with benefits.
But the more he got to know Carmen, the more he wanted from her.
He went into the bathroom and pulled on his swim trunks, careful to be quiet and avoid waking her. Then he went back out into the bedroom to grab a clean pair of jeans and a T-shirt from his bag, to put on after his time in the pool. There were changing rooms downstairs and he didn’t plan to come back to the suite until after she’d left for the day.
It was avoidance, plain and simple, but then “mornings-after” weren’t exactly his thing.
Usually he was long gone by the time the sun rose on his flings. It was only being honest, really. He wasn’t cut out for relationships—not with the example his father had set for him—and he always told his partners that up front.
He’d told Carmen that too, but something about this weekend with her had changed things. Made him think that maybe he’d been lying to himself all along. Made him wonder if perhaps settling down was what he wanted and needed, but he wasn’t brave enough to try for it. Because if a man like his father had been seduced into cheating, who was to say Zac wouldn’t make the same mistake? And the last thing he wanted to do was hurt Carmen. She’d been through enough in her life already.
Torn and twisted inside, he let himself out of the room and headed downstairs. Sleeping with Carmen again didn’t feel like just another one-night stand. Being with her felt like champagne and breakfast in bed. Like lazy Sunday mornings reading the paper.
Like a “forever” kind of thing.
Too bad he was just a “right now” kind of guy.
Aren’t I?
This early in the morning there weren’t many people up and about at the resort, so he had the pool to himself. For half an hour he did laps, working out some of the tension that had been building in his muscles for days and hoping the time alone might do the same for his jumbled mind.
By the time he’d finished and pulled himself out to sit on the edge of the pool, he was out of breath and shaking from exertion—and still remembering Carmen upstairs in bed, tousled and tempting as hell. Instead of racing back there, like he wanted, he jumped back in the water to put in another twenty minutes.
But even the burn of his body as he pushed it to its limits didn’t stop the sound of her gasps as he’d brought her to climax again and again, the taste of salt from her skin, the feel of her exquisite breasts in his palms.
There was no doubt the two of them fit perfectly—in and out of bed.
She’d been a delight at the bowling alley—laughing and teasing and pushing him to do better, to be better, because she was so good. He still couldn’t quite believe he’d opened up to her as much as he had about his past and his father—more than he had with anyone else in recent memory. And even with all she’d told him about herself he wanted to know more. He wanted to know what she ate for breakfast, what toothpaste she liked, how she got her hair to stay in those perfect curls, who had been her first crush and could he possibly be her last...if he was brave enough to try?
Damn.
He dunked himself underwater, then rose to swipe his hand over his face. Enough. Brave or not, all this was pointless. Because after this weekend he’d go back to his life in Anchorage and she’d most likely be moving to California. Nothing would change, because nothing could change.
Zac climbed out of the pool and grabbed his towel from a nearby chair. He dried off, then headed into the changing rooms to shower and pull on the clothes he’d brought.
Wishing things were different would get him exactly nowhere. He didn’t like to think about his father or his upbringing often, but in this instance his father’s words rang true.
Get over it, son.
Intent on doing just that, after he was dressed Zac decided to hit the resort restaurant for breakfast. Usually, when he was at home and working, he ate on the run. He never knew when a call would come in and he had to be ready in a moment’s notice. Today, though, he planned to order the most elaborate thing on the menu—just to burn up some time. Whatever took the longest to cook, that was what he’d have. Then, once he’d eaten, he’d stop by the front desk, just to confirm that Carmen had gone to her seminars for the day before returning to the suite.
It wasn’t that he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands to himself—though the idea of keeping her in bed all day was more than appealing. Nope. What kept him out of the room and away from her was the very real and terrifying possibility that she’d want to talk more, find out more about him. Because that was the thing about secrets. Once you opened the door even a little the whole mess had a tendency to spill out.
He berated himself again for not being honest with her up front, even though it would do him little good now. What was done was done, and the only way to move was forward.
Get over it, son.
He rounded the corner and halted at the entrance to the restaurant. It was Saturday, and he’d forgotten they only served a buffet breakfast on the weekend. Damn. That cut out any prep time for his food. Fine. He’d eat slowly. It was all good.
The hostess showed him to a table for two in the mainly empty dining room, then directed him to help himself at the buffet.
He was doing just that when a familiar voice said from beside him, “Morning, boy.”
Dustin.
Zac glanced at the older gentleman and smiled, grateful for the distraction. “Good morning. How’s the arm?”
“Better. Thanks to you and your lady friend.”
Dustin let him see the bandage, then toasted him with his cup of coffee. Zac’s father had always given the employees complimentary meals during their shifts. A perk of the job, his dad had always said. Treat people right and they’ll do the same for you.
Too bad his good judgment hadn’t carried over to his marriage or his family.
“Where is the lovely Carmen this morning?” Dustin asked, picking up several slices of bacon with a pair of tongs while Zac loaded his plate with hash browns and eggs.
He rolled his shoulders to ease the knots between his shoulder blades and forced a smile he didn’t quite feel. “Carmen’s not my lady friend. She’s just a friend. And she’s still in the room, as far as I know.”
“I see... But she is lovely, though.” Dustin cocked his head, as though he saw right through the BS, then headed toward a table not far from Zac’s. “Why don’t you join me?”
“Sure—if you don’t mind?”
“If I minded I wouldn’t have asked.” Dustin chuckled and walked away.
Zac followed the older man to his table, where there was already a pot of coffee and a carafe of orange juice waiting. They sat down and started on their food.
“Seen your parents yet?” Dustin asked.
“Nah.” Zac halted mid-bite and shook his head. “Had a near miss Thursday night, but I managed to get out of the banquet room before they saw me.”
“You know you can’t outrun them forever, boy?”
Yeah, Zac knew. But if he could just avoid a confrontation this weekend, that would be great. He didn’t want to ruin things for Carmen. Didn’t want to deal with all the pain and hurt and regret himself, either.
He stared down at his plate, his appetite plummeting. He felt like the walls were closing in on him and he didn’t like it one bit.
“Maybe you should just talk to him,” Dustin said, watching Zac over the rim of his coffee cup. “Get it over with.”
“No.” He pushed arou
nd a mound of potatoes with his fork. “I’ve got nothing to say to him.”
“Really?” The older man remained silent for a moment, then said, “My employment anniversary here is coming up next month. Been at the Arctic Star for twenty-nine years. Almost as long as your father has owned the place.”
“Congratulations.” Zac didn’t look up, even though he could feel Dustin’s gaze on him. This wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have right now.
“I still remember that night you tore out of here after talking to your dad that last time. He was devastated after you left—kept trying to get ahold of you, but you wouldn’t take his calls. I think he aged a hundred years in a month back then. Hard times.”
Well, at least that last part was right. “Hard” didn’t begin to describe the anger and betrayal Zac had felt after learning of his dad’s affair. He’d spent sixteen years idolizing the man, following in his footsteps, wanting to be just like him. To have all that demolished over one stupid, thoughtless decision had been something he just couldn’t forgive and forget.
Of course the media circus that had followed the story breaking hadn’t helped either. The stupid tabloids had brought it up over and over again, rubbing their family’s faces in it. In fact, it had been after reading a particularly heinous smear piece about his father that Zac had wrecked his car and put his date in the hospital. He’d thought he could outrun the rage and embarrassment, but that hadn’t been the case.
It was never the case. Problems had a way of following you until you dealt with them, once and for all.
“He’s missed you terribly,” Dustin said. “We all have.”
“Yeah, well... He should’ve thought about that before he did what he did.” Zac shook his head. “Please don’t preach at me about forgiveness. What he did was wrong and now he has to live with the consequences. I know my mother was able to move past it, and I respect her decision, but I’m not there yet.”
“Not disagreeing with you there, boy. Infidelity is an ugly thing. But we all stumble sometimes. It’s what we do afterward that counts.”
A Weekend with Her Fake Fiancé Page 12