Dustin finished his coffee, then checked his watch and stood.
“Time for me to finish up back at the desk and turn things over to Willow for the day shift. I’ll be around later if you need me. Think about making amends, boy. Time is precious. Don’t waste new opportunities because of old tribulations.”
With that, the older man walked away, leaving Zac alone to stare after him.
Frowning, he finished his food and thought over Dustin’s words. As far as Zac knew, his sixty-year-old father was in fine health. Honestly, the man was stubborn enough to live to a thousand just to spite the world. Besides, Zac wasn’t in much of a forgiving mood at the moment.
He had too many other things on his mind.
Like how to tell the woman he was falling for that he’d been lying to her from the start.
* * *
Carmen’s day had been filled with more seminars and another lunch meeting with Ellen Landon—this time to discuss the staffing requirements of the new clinic and the newly minted outreach program for providing medical care and prenatal services to the low-income and homeless population in and around Big Sur.
When asked for her opinions, Carmen had spoken from the heart about growing up poor, and how that had given her a special insight into the problems of women living below the poverty line. It was an insight she knew Priya would not be able to share, since she’d grown up in a wealthy family near Chicago. Ellen had been impressed, and for the first time Carmen had felt like she had the upper hand on the new position in California.
That alone should’ve made her overjoyed. It was what this weekend was all about, after all. What she’d been working so hard toward for the last two months.
But, unfortunately, all she could think about was Zac.
Waking up alone hadn’t been how she’d wanted to start the day. Since then she’d kept an eye out for Zac in the halls between seminars, but so far there’d been no sign of him at all. If they’d been back in Anchorage she’d have suspected he was avoiding her. Here at the resort, however, there were plenty of fun activities to take up his time. She’d see him eventually, since the big final banquet was tonight.
The banquet where Ellen would announce her choice for the new job.
An odd mix of nervous butterflies and sad disappointment fluttered through her system. The nerves were about the job. She still wanted it. Of course she did. It was everything she’d dreamed of achieving—more prestige and more responsibility, more opportunities to help those in need, more money to help with her sister’s education and her mother’s medical care. It was all good.
Except...
She’d miss Anchorage, the people and the places she’d come to love, including Zac. He was her friend, her colleague, her lover.
Yes, he’d made it clear he wasn’t the type of man to settle down, but the truth was she’d not been with anyone else since their one night together after the holiday party. It wasn’t that she hadn’t had cravings, it was just that they’d all been focused on one man, and she doubted anyone else could measure up to the incredible synergy she had with Zac.
Each time she closed her eyes it was like she was right back there with him, riding that wave of pleasure to its ultimate crest. They hadn’t been able to get enough of each other and she’d loved every delicious minute of it. He was a generous lover, vocal in what he wanted and expecting the same from her. Part of her had thought maybe sleeping with him again might get him out of her system once and for all, but the opposite was true. She wanted him now more than ever. Being with Zac was addictive and she never wanted to stop.
It was like they were two halves of the same whole.
Which both thrilled and terrified her.
Mainly because she wasn’t sure he’d ever admit the same, even though it was obvious he felt it in the way he touched her, held her, knew what she needed before she even knew herself.
Plus, she wasn’t used to relying on another person for anything—including love.
But with Zac things seemed deeper, more permanent than in any of her previous relationships. If you could call what they had a relationship. Okay, maybe not a relationship, but the start of...something. Something more and special and real.
He’d finally opened up to her at the bowling alley, and later on in bed, sharing glimpses of his past, which was encouraging. And though she sensed he was still holding back secrets, the rest would come with time.
Carmen wasn’t one for hearts and rainbows and flower petal romances. She was far too pragmatic. But Zac had well and truly swept her off her feet and now she needed to figure out how to proceed. They needed to talk. She needed to find out what he wanted, since before this weekend he’d made it clear that he was a player.
She wasn’t naïve enough to think a night or two of great sex would change a man. Besides, it wasn’t her responsibility to fix him, no matter how his broken parts might call to her. But things had moved well past the friend zone for her after last night, and she had to know if they had for him as well.
The clock on the wall said her next seminar was starting soon, so she finished up her coffee, then headed into a talk on using a physiological model for the management of the head-to-body interval during vaginal birth. It was another packed room, but Priya had saved her a seat.
“Hey.” Carmen got out her notebook. “How’s your day going?”
“Fine,” Priya said, although her normally perky tone was flat. “And yours?”
“Good.” Carmen glanced over at her and saw her friend was looking a bit green around the gills. “Everything okay?”
“Fine,” Priya said. “Just tired.”
Unconvinced, Carmen dug a packet of saltine crackers out of her tote. “Here. These will settle your stomach.”
“Thanks.”
The lights dimmed and the presentation started, but thoughts of the night before continued to distract Carmen. In terms of her career, she probably shouldn’t even be looking for anything long-term right now, since she was closer than ever to landing the California job. To turn her back on all that over a man who might not even want her in his future was ludicrous.
No. They needed to talk. And as soon as she could get some alone time with him, they would. If not today, then tonight—at the banquet.
CHAPTER TEN
THE EVENING FINALLY ARRIVED, but for Zac it felt like anything but a party. After avoiding Carmen and his parents for most of the day, and running the conversation he’d had with Dustin over and over in his head on an endless loop, he felt the burden of the secrets he was keeping weighing heavier than ever on his shoulders.
He should tell Carmen the truth.
He wanted to tell Carmen the truth.
He would tell Carmen the truth when the right time came.
Which wasn’t now.
After the big announcement about who was to get the new job in California maybe.
In Zac’s mind, Carmen was a shoo-in. She was more than qualified, had the practical experience, and most of all she truly cared about her patients and her coworkers. She deserved it. And he intended to do everything he could tonight to make sure she got it—even if it meant losing her forever.
Zac adjusted his black bow tie in the full-length mirror in the suite, then stared at his reflection. Elegant, refined, the designer tux would provide excellent armor for the evening ahead.
We all stumble sometimes. It’s what we do afterward that counts.
Exhaling slowly, Zac walked over to the dresser to grab his cufflinks—small ovals of sterling silver engraved with his initials. They were one of the few things he’d taken with him when he’d left this place—a gift from his mother on his high school graduation. They’d cost more than some people made in a week. A reminder of everything he’d left behind.
He slid them into place, then tweaked his cuffs to be sure they were secure.
Moments l
ater Carmen emerged from the bathroom, and he turned to face her...
“Wow,” was all he managed to say, taking in the silver beaded lace evening gown that clung like a second skin to all her glorious curves.
Zac swallowed hard against the tightness in his throat. She wore her hair up again too, with a few loose curls hanging around her neck and face. All he could think about was holding her, kissing her, feeling her beneath him, surrounding him as she came apart in his arms.
Carmen put in her earrings—small, sparkling studs—then walked over and turned her back to him. She gave him a coy smile over her shoulder, the glint in her lovely eyes saying she knew exactly the effect she had on him.
“Can you zip me up please?”
Zac did as she asked, his hands far less steady than he’d like. Finished, he stepped back—away from her and her sweet jasmine scent, away from temptation. Because if he didn’t keep his distance now they’d both end up back in bed and miss the dinner entirely.
“Are you ready?” She grabbed her tiny purse from the top of the dresser, then gave him a hesitant smile. “We don’t want to be late.”
“No.” He shook his head. “I mean, yes. I’m ready. But before we go...” He took her hands, his pulse pounding in his ears and his skin prickling with heat.
Tell her.
But he couldn’t. Not yet. This was her big night.
He’d wait until after the ball, when they were alone, when he would be able to suffer the humiliation and pain of her walking away in private.
She looked up at him, so beautiful, so trusting. He wanted her more than he’d ever wanted any woman in his life, but he’d never be worthy of her.
He cleared his throat. “You look amazing. You’ll get that California job and take the entire state by storm. I’ll be in Anchorage, cheering you on.”
Something flickered in her eyes, gone before he could catch it. If he didn’t know better, he’d say it was longing. But then she put on the brave, professional smile he knew so well from Anchorage Mercy and gave a decisive nod.
“Thank you. Let’s get downstairs.”
The event planners at the resort had certainly outdone themselves with tonight’s décor. Zac took it all in as he escorted Carmen into the dining room. LED lights projected a gorgeous display of deep blue, purple and rose colors onto the vaulted ceiling, making it resemble an abstract stained-glass window. Long swathes of white tulle were draped between the columns in the room, stretching from each column to the large chandelier at the center of the space.
The tables had been arranged in semicircles before the stage, where the podium sat ready for the presentations and the big announcement later in the evening. Towering centerpieces of white lilies and roses graced each white-linen-covered table and a tasteful string quartet played in one corner. There was also DJ equipment for later, when the dance floor would open again.
Seemed his father had thought of every detail—again.
Zac’s steps faltered and Carmen gave him a curious glance.
“Okay?” she asked, her expression concerned. “You seem more jittery than me tonight.”
“I’m fine.”
He resisted the urge to fidget with his tie again and scanned the area. Lots of the guests were milling about, talking or laughing or catching up with colleagues they saw only perhaps once a year. No sign of his parents yet, which was a relief. If he’d been here with anyone other than Carmen he would’ve left, but he didn’t want to let her down.
Jaw set, he led Carmen to their table, near the front of the space, held her chair for her, then took the space beside her. Ellen and Liz were there already, as were Priya and Lance.
Zac greeted them all, noting that Lance wasn’t acting like his usual outgoing, gregarious self. He seemed hyper-focused on Priya. Doting, even, with his head bent toward her and his arm around her protectively. Zac wanted to ask him what was going on, but the master of ceremonies for the evening had taken the podium to welcome everyone and announce that dinner was served.
While they ate, several presentations took place, and Zac kept a watchful eye out for his father. The thought of playing cat and mouse with him all night had lessened his appetite significantly, though the food was delicious—as always. Sweet potato, coconut and coriander soup for the appetizer, followed by pan-fried duck breast with black cherries and basil polenta, and finishing with raspberry mousse and homemade chocolate-dipped shortbread.
Lovely as the meal was, though, Zac could’ve been eating cardboard for all he tasted it.
“This resort has been lovely,” Ellen said as the waiter cleared away their plates. “I’d definitely come back here for a vacation. If I can tear my wife away from her practice.”
Liz laughed, finishing her last bite of raspberry mousse. “I think you could twist my arm. Besides, we should have more free time after this new position at the clinic is filled.” She looked over at Carmen, then Priya, giving them each a wink. “Isn’t that right?”
“Yes, ma’am,” Carmen said.
Priya nodded and gave a wan smile.
Yeah, there was something definitely off with those two. Zac couldn’t put his finger on it, but the shadows beneath Priya’s eyes suggested that she hadn’t been sleeping well. He’d have to pull his buddy aside later and ask. Maybe it would distract him from his own problems.
“Oh, look.” Ellen raised her chin toward the opposite side of the dining room as some of the diners began to get up and mill around the room and the buzz of conversation filled the air. “Here comes the owner. We should tell them how much we’ve enjoyed the venue this year. Oh, but the MC is waving us up to the stage. If you’ll excuse us?”
Both she and Liz left before Zac’s parents could come over and he felt the earth disappear beneath his feet. If he could’ve sunk beneath the table he would have.
Instead, he stood and excused himself. “I need some air.”
“You can’t leave.” Carmen frowned up at him. “They’re going to make the announcement soon.”
“I won’t be long,” he said, tossing his napkin on the table and stepping back—just as his father approached their table.
Damn. Too late.
They locked eyes for the first time in twelve years and Zac saw his father’s expression shift from recognition to determination in a matter of seconds. Zac opened his mouth to speak, but the words stuck in his throat. Vaguely he was aware of Priya excusing herself and heading to the restrooms with Lance following close behind her. Time seemed to slow.
His father continued to stare at him, but his mother was still speaking to a woman at another table nearby. Pulse racing, Zac fisted his hands at his sides and forced himself to stand his ground. This moment had been a long time coming and the air around their table seemed to crackle with tension.
“Son,” his father said, his cool tone edged with wariness.
Fresh anger sizzled beneath Zac’s skin even as he battled to keep it under control. This was not how he wanted things to go down. Not here. Not now. Not with so much on the line for him.
Carmen glanced between Zac and his father, frowning. “Son...? Zac, what’s he talking about? Do you know this man?”
“I did. Once,” he said, his jaw tight. “But he has no right to call me that anymore.”
His mother turned at that moment, to see her son and her husband facing off across the table. Her bright smile faltered as she took Zac’s father’s arm. “Please, Zac. It’s been so long since we’ve seen you. Can’t we talk about this? Finally put it behind us?”
His father spoke again. “Yes. That’s what I want too, son. I’m sorry about what happened all those years ago. It was never my intention to hurt you,” his father said, his voice beseeching. “But things are different now. I’m different. Please give me a chance to talk to you, to explain things—”
“Zac?” Carmen said, her eyes widening. “A
re these your parents?”
Chest aching, Zac stepped away from her. “Yes.”
Hurt flickered across her lovely face as she put the pieces together. “Your father owns this resort? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I don’t tell anyone about my past.” His sharp tone reverberated through the space between them. “Why would that be any different this weekend with you?”
Even as the words emerged he regretted them. He had opened up to her more than he had with anyone else. He had even intended to tell her the full truth about himself eventually. But it was too late to take back his statement now, if the way the color had drained from Carmen’s face was any indication.
He wanted to apologize, wanted to scream to the huge pine rafters above that he loved her, that none of this mattered to him anymore. All he cared about was her. But it was too late.
Frustrated, he lashed out at his father again. “What exactly are you going to explain to me, huh? How you’re a reformed liar and a cheat? How you’ve moved past your deception and made a new life for yourself with my mother? How you regret throwing away your family, your flesh and blood, and the love of a woman who worshipped the ground you walked on for one night of pleasure? Sorry, but I’ve already heard it and I can do without the replay. There was a time I worshipped you, trusted you, loved you. But no more. Because not a day goes by that I don’t worry I’ll turn out just like you. Does that make you proud? Is that the legacy you wanted to pass on to your son? Loneliness? Isolation? Embarrassment? If so, then congratulations. Because of you I don’t trust anyone. Because of you I sleep around and never commit to anyone. Why should I when I could end up cheating on them just like you did my mother?”
The truth cut like a razor on Zac’s tongue, but he’d been holding it in far too long.
His father’s face had gone ashen. “Please, son...”
“Stop calling me that!” Zac pulled away when Carmen reached for his arm.
“Zac, please... Step outside with us into the hallway, where we can discuss this in private,” his mother pleaded. “Your father has atoned for his mistakes. He’s not the same person. Give him a chance—”
A Weekend with Her Fake Fiancé Page 13