Journey to the Unknown

by Jacqueline Francis

  “Oh, God…Kevin…”

  A few seconds later, his hand tightened over hers as he reached his own orgasm. He dropped his forehead against hers. He was trembling. It might have been her. She couldn’t distinguish between their bodies at that moment.

  He stayed on top of her until they felt somewhat normal again, his lips and tongue lazily tracing along the side of her neck. After a long while, he lifted off her and she felt a strange emptiness as he slowly pulled out of her. “Give me a second.”

  He walked to the bathroom to dispose of the condom and she stretched out her numb legs before getting under the covers. When he returned, he pulled on his boxers before he shifted one single bed next to the other and climbed in beside her. It was a little weird because she didn’t know if they should cuddle or hold, so instead she simply stared up at the ceiling.

  “I didn’t know sex was like that,” she said.

  “It’s not.” He tugged her arm until she moved her head onto his chest and then he wrapped his arm around her. “It’s just like that with you.”

  She smiled, lightly caressing her fingers across his skin. He placed his hand over hers and she felt his breathing begin to slow. It may have been because of the constant fighting, or him not sleeping at all last night, or even the emotionally draining afternoon, but he fell asleep within minutes and she was alone with her thoughts. Maybe this had started out because they’d both needed comfort, but it didn’t end that way. This was so much more. One of her objectives for this road trip was to have a few one-night stands, meaningless sex. It was supposed to be mechanical, but what happened between them was anything but. He made it mean something, something she wasn’t entirely sure she would be able to let go of at the end of this road trip.

  November, 25

  Amarillo, Texas

  Kevin woke up in an empty bed. He’d never woken up with Jasmin in the room because she always snuck out at the crack of dawn to workout. Today was no different, but the sound of running water told him that she was already back and in the shower. He moved to sit on the edge of the bed and dropped his head into his hands.

  Last night they went past the point of no return. This was exactly the type of complications he’d been trying to avoid. He didn’t know what the next step should be, which path he should choose. He’d never been that vulnerable around anyone before. Perry’s death was a loss he’d carried by himself for three months. He’d told her the things that hurt him to the depths of his soul and now he felt completely exposed. His first instinct was to close up and shield himself from her. But he didn’t know if he could do that again.

  He cared about her too much, and if anything, last night had solidified that even more. He still had his doubts. The guilt and pain hadn’t eased because of one night, but it felt so good to let it go for a while. Just a little. Just so that he didn’t feel it every single second. Being around Jasmin did that. She didn’t take it away, but she made him forget. He just had to keep reminding himself that this was temporary. It would end soon and he would go back to being miserable, but until then there was no reason to keep hurting her.

  She walked out of the bathroom and completely avoided eye contact when she saw him. She was feeling as vulnerable as he was. They were definitely in this together.

  “So I was thinking that we could have breakfast at the Little Texan,” she began nervously, “and if we get on the road early enough, we could still do some sightseeing in Oklahoma. It won’t be too dark by the time we get there and…”

  She was rambling on about nonsense and he realized that she was giving him a choice to opt out, treat it like a one-night stand if he wanted. But that wasn’t what he wanted.

  “Are we gonna pretend last night didn’t happen?” he cut in.

  She froze for a moment. “Last night was sort of…unexpected and I’m not sure what to make of it. We were both in a weird place and…that’s not us. We don’t like…emotions and we don’t cry. We’re them big dick motherfuckers…well, at least I am. Yours is just kinda…average.”

  He chuckled, shaking his head. He’d missed this. “That joke’s a little offensive now that you’ve…actually seen it.”

  She gave half a smile, her eyes darting to his boxers, and when she noticed that he caught her doing it, she flushed and immediately looked away. “My point is that if it was about comfort for you—”

  “It wasn’t.”

  “Or…if you maybe got caught up in the moment…and one thing led to another…If you regret it…or if you didn’t really want to do it…”

  It was that stupid pity make-out comment that had her bouncing through these various levels of insecurity. He fought the shame and forced his eyes up to meet hers. “Jasmin, last night was hard for me, but I don’t regret anything that happened. Being with you…I couldn’t possibly regret it. And I want you to know that I’ve never wanted anything…or anyone more in my entire life.”

  That was all she needed to hear. She smiled and visibly relaxed. “So…how…how was it?”

  It was natural for her to want reassurance after her first time, but he couldn’t understand why she needed it. He thought the answer was pretty obvious. “It was…awkward…and amazing. How was it for you?”

  “Awful,” she replied instantly. “Absolutely terrible.”

  “I guess I misread those orgasms…or the sexy way you whispered my name every time I made you come.”

  Just remembering it had his cock stiffening beneath his boxers. She saw it. It was impossible not to. A blush rose to her cheeks, not pink, not red, crimson and he had to hold back a smile when she couldn’t keep eye contact anymore.

  “I told you I didn’t want my first time to be special and then you had to go and make it…incredible and…beautiful. You should be ashamed of yourself.”

  “I’m a despicable human being.” He stood up and she became nervous again as he walked towards her.

  “But we were in a weird place yesterday, so…I guess I forgive you.”

  “Thank you. I feel better already.”

  “Maybe…maybe there’s a way we could rectify this…horrid event.”

  He grabbed the front of her sweater and tugged her towards him. “I’m listening.”

  “If you want…we could…we could do it again.”

  “Fuck, yes.”

  He didn’t need to be asked twice. His mouth claimed hers, raw and hungry. He gripped the edge of her sweater and yanked it off. She was still nervous and he was really trying to restrain himself, but it was incredibly difficult now that her tits were exposed, the lacy cups of her bra barely leaving much to the imagination. Using his body weight, he shoved her onto the bed. He tugged off her bra strap and felt her body stiffen as his mouth moved down to her collarbone.

  “Kevin…”

  He shut his eyes and groaned inwardly. That wasn’t a moan. He was moving too fast again. Being with someone with no experience wasn’t easy and he needed to learn how to pace himself. He could tell by her tone that she was going to start talking.

  “Yes, Jasmin,” he said, keeping his mouth against her shoulder.

  “I’m a little nervous.”

  “I know.”

  “I just wanna slow down a bit. You’re excited…and that’s a good thing. I wouldn’t want you to be…not excited. I think my body just needs a little more time to get to that level of…excitement…and then…it could be…exciting for both of us.”

  “Okay. But going forward, maybe we should put the word excite and all its variations in the box.”

  “Is this awkward for you too?”

  “It is now.”

  “I was thinking…maybe we should play around with some dirty talk…to ease the tension.”

  He was glad that she still couldn’t see his face because he cringed just hearing that. “You’re actually making awkward sex…more awkward. Dirty talk shouldn’t be planned. And you already know this about me. I prefer not talking at all.”

  “I’ve done some research on it and if we want thi
s time to be…a little rough and nasty…I really think it will help set the mood.”

  That was the worst idea ever, but she was new at this and he didn’t want to discourage her, so he lifted his head to look down at her. “Okay,” he said, feeling a little apprehensive. It was the word research that threw him off. “What did you have in mind?”

  “Well…how do you feel about the word…cunnilingus?”

  “I feel like it shouldn’t exist.”

  “Okay.” She searched her mind for another one. “What if I said…I wanna milk your cock?”

  His eyebrows creased. “Am I a cow?”

  “That one doesn’t work for you either, huh? Uh…oh, this one is good. I want you to fuck me…with your penis.”

  That one cracked him up. Laughter rolled out of him and he dropped over onto his back beside her. Clasping his hands over his forehead, he gritted his teeth, not knowing whether he was frustrated or amused.

  “Where did you read that shit?” he asked, lifting his hands to look at her. “Flaccid dick dot com?” He let out a deep breath as his laughter subsided, simultaneously trying to let go of his pent-up sexual energy. “Maybe we should try this again later. I only have one condom left anyway, so we’ll buy more after breakfast and then maybe…by tonight, you won’t be so nervous.”

  She pulled her bra strap back on and sat up. “Do we…need condoms? I mean…I’m on the pill…and you’re…”

  He knew what her question was without her asking it. His last test was four months ago and he hadn’t been with anyone since then. “I’m good…All good on my side.”

  “So…do we need it?”

  He’d never had unprotected sex before and he was a little skeptical about it, because the thought of it felt very intimate. Then again, Jasmin was a lot of firsts for him too. “I guess not.”

  She smiled and took his hand. “I’m sorry I ruined the mood.”

  “It’s okay. I don’t want to rush you into anything. Sometimes I just get a little ahead of myself.” He turned his head to give her his full attention. “Why are you so nervous around me?”

  “I don’t know,” she replied with a shrug. “I guess these last few days were very confusing for me. You were so cold…and then last night you changed. I don’t really understand what happened.”

  “Nothing changed,” he said, gently squeezing her hand. “This is still a bad idea. Every thought racing through my head is telling me that I should stay away from you, but…you make it so hard to listen.”

  A smile stretched across her face. “I can definitely relate to that.”

  She leaned down to kiss him, but chickened out at the last second. Lifting his hand to her face, he brought her down the rest of the way and kissed her. The feel of her lips was something he could never get tired of—fleshy, alluring softness. His tongue played with hers, drawing her in until her reservations melted away. Very slowly this time, he moved his other hand up to cup her breasts, his thumb massaging her nipple over her bra. She gasped, but didn’t pull away and he took that as a sign that he could go a little further.

  “Climb on top of me,” he whispered.

  Her eyes widened. “What?”

  “Strip down and climb on top of me.”

  She thought about it for a few seconds before she stood up, and she was hesitant as she slowly kicked off her sneakers. As she shimmied out of her sweatpants, his eyes were drawn down from her toned stomach to the sexy tattoo on her hip. She was about to climb back onto the bed when he stopped her.

  “All of it.”

  His wandering eyes didn’t do much to settle her anxiety and her hands trembled a little as she took off her underwear. Never in his life did he have to practice that kind of restraint. The sight of her naked body already made his palms itch, but he needed to take it at her pace, give her control until she felt more comfortable. She crawled across the bed and straddled his hips.

  The only barrier between them was his boxer shorts and he groaned when he felt her heat through the thin material. “Kiss me.”

  She lowered her lips to his and his hand slipped behind her to undo her braid, allowing her long hair to fall over her shoulders. As their lips caressed and their tongues explored, he took one of her hands, slid it down his chest and into his boxers. She broke the kiss and stared at him as he closed her fingers around his cock.

  She was more excited than nervous now. “It looks like I got your dick on H again, Kevin.”

  “Yeah.”

  “What…what should I do?”

  “Whatever you want. You’ve given me your body, Jasmin. Feel free to take mine.”

  He removed his hand and his eyes shut when she began to move hers. Slow and uncertain at first, but as his breathing elevated so did her confidence. Gripping him tighter, she quickened her pace. He kissed her again, threading one hand in her hair and using the other to caress her, running it over her breast and down her stomach. He loved the feel of her, the contrast between hard and soft. Moving lower to between her legs, he felt her wetness coating his fingertips. And when he slid his fingers inside her, she lost it. Her tongue plunged deeper into his mouth, her hand moved faster up and down his cock. Her responsiveness drove him wild. He met her halfway, thrusting into her hand. She took as much as she gave, grinding her hips against his palm.

  She only let him enjoy it for a few minutes before she pulled his hand away and began an unhurried descent down his body, leaving open-mouth kisses on his chest and abs until she was tugging down his boxers.

  “You’re gonna have to help me with this too,” she said, looking up at him.

  “I don’t think you need it.”

  His voice was hoarse with anticipation and his entire body went rigid. He grasped her hair, lifting it away from her face so he could watch those thick, sexy lips wrap around his cock. He’d always been a visual guy and watching her take him deeper into her mouth had him gripping the sheets. She experimented with different techniques, swirling her tongue, licking, using the changes in his breathing to guide her. But when her cheeks hollowed, her mouth became a vacuum, sucking him hard until he felt like he was going to pass out.

  He wasn’t going to last much longer if she kept doing that. He hoisted her back up, grasping her thighs so she could straddle his hips again.

  “I want to be inside you,” he said, impatiently pressing his tip against her entrance.

  Wanton heat flashed in her eyes. She was as hot as he was, and she shifted her hips, taking him in a little deeper. Slick, silky and so deliciously tight, she whimpered as she lowered herself. This was very different to the night before. Her body was willing and pliant, offering no resistance and the feel of her bare skin made restraining himself that much harder.

  Keeping his hands on her hips, he began slowly rocking her against him and then he let go, allowing her to find her own rhythm, do what felt good for her. She took her time, learning what she liked, what he liked. But learning soon turned into something more primal. Up and down and back and forth, she chased her own pleasure and he loved every second of it.

  Her nails scraped down his chest and she nipped his earlobe with her teeth. “I love your body,” she whispered breathlessly.

  His palms pressed up her thighs, his fingers squeezing her perfect, juicy ass. Somehow he found his voice through his own ragged breathing. “Even my average-sized penis?” he replied with a teasing grin.

  “Especially that…fuck…” She rode him harder, her hips moving faster and faster, her firm tits rubbing against him. “It’s…so…average…”

  He felt her clenching around him. She was nearing her peak. He gave her no warning, just flipped her onto her back and buried his face between her legs. He’d never been the type to indulge in cunnilingus (as she so put it). Sex was usually a quick, ten-minute, in and out sort of thing, but every part of her seemed to call to him. It beckoned, begged: Kevin…put your mouth on here. And this was the body made by the legendary Alfred. Who was he to say no?

  He ate her out, tasting
every part of her. His tongue probed and penetrated, alternating between moving inside her and sucking on her clit. She went wild—writhing, moaning, grabbing his hair. He was relentless, not easing up until she burst, the sweet taste of her orgasm lining his tongue. She wasn’t a screamer. Every time she climaxed, she whispered his name, like her pleasure was a secret that was only supposed to be shared between the two of them.

  He barely gave her a chance to catch her breath before he was moving up. An ecstatic gasp filled the air as he entered her again. His hips hit against her as he shoved himself in to the hilt. Her muscles contracted around him, gripping him like a vise. Restraint be damned.

  “Fair warning,” he said, looking down at her flushed face. “I’m not gonna be gentle.”

  After the first, solid thrust, her nails pressed into his shoulder and with every thrust thereafter, he felt them dig deeper until it felt like she broke skin. He didn’t care. He fucked her hard, his strokes short and shallow. It didn’t take long to realize that Jasmin liked it a little rough, because her hands moved down to his ass, forcing him to go deeper every time his cock rammed into her.

  “Ohhhh,” she moaned, shifting her hips in rhythm with his. “I like that.”

  A groan was the only thing he could get out. Her pussy tightened around him, signaling another orgasm, and he slowed down just a fraction to kiss her.

  “Say, Kevin, I’m coming,” he said against her lips.

  Her back arched off the bed. “Kevin…I’m coming.”

  It was that aching whisper that sent him over the edge. Her pleasure was his and he owned it. With a low groan, he drove himself deeper, coming so hard his body spasmed. Sweaty and huffing, he dropped his head onto her shoulder, kissing her collarbone until he’d emptied himself completely. “That was incredible.”

  “Yeah,” she agreed, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I think this puts me in the sex-goddess category.”

  He smiled against her skin. After the last few days, listening to this nonsense was like music to his ears. He knew he’d missed this, but he didn’t realize how much until that moment.