Dirty Little Secret

by Jennifer Ryan

  “Noah . . .”

  God, the way she said his name.

  “It’s late and I’m exhausted. Can this wait?”

  “Ah, thank you. For my room. I, uh, really appreciate it.” He ran a hand through his hair, uncomfortable under her penetrating gaze.

  “How’d that taste coming out of your mouth? You thanking me for anything after John left me half of your ranch and home?”

  “Like horseshit.” Not really, because the thing was, she got it.

  Despite the fact she had to be jealous as hell that he’d grown up here with John, she understood his anger and resentment. She had a side. He had a side. And she was willing to concede that his feelings mattered just as much as hers.

  She laughed, and the sound went right to his belly and tied it in knots.

  Unable to fight it any longer, he closed the distance between them and with one hand sliding to the back of her neck, his fingers buried in the thick mass of silky hair, he pulled her lips to his. She smelled of paint with a hint of flowers, like the ones she’d left by his bed. Their smell teased him all night and made him think of her.

  His instinct was to devour, but he felt her tense and her eyes went wide. Watching her, he brushed his lips against hers. Once. Twice. With barely a touch, he tasted a hint of the sweet grapes she’d eaten.

  She stood perfectly still; her breath washed over his mouth from her slightly parted lips. “I thought we agreed this wasn’t a good idea.”

  “We both lied about that.” He kissed her softly again, lingering over the sweet torment. He could take the kiss deeper, have her wrapped in his arms and begging for him to take her to bed. He saw the hunger to match his own in her eyes, but he also caught the slight hesitation and a trace of—not exactly fear, but doubt.

  About what, he didn’t know. He didn’t believe Roxy was afraid of anything. She’d left her old life and moved to a stranger’s house because a young girl needed her. That took guts, knowing her welcome wasn’t exactly friendly, at least on his part.

  Instead of taking what he wanted, he gave in to instinct and pressed his mouth to hers in a soft undemanding kiss that was warm and sweet and unrushed. He didn’t pull her closer, but enjoyed the feel of her mouth against his, the way her eyes fluttered closed as she sank into the kiss and the moment with him, and the brush of the hard tips of her breasts barely skimming his chest as her breathing deepened. Time stopped.

  He withdrew slowly and she leaned into him, her mouth following his until they broke the kiss.

  Her eyes flew open and studied him.

  “Thank you for putting the smile back on Annabelle’s face.”

  “You’re welcome. She’s a great kid. I like her.” The soft smile told him she meant it. “Good night, Noah.” She stepped back and his hand slid out of her silky hair and across the soft skin along her neck.

  “Night.” He stood rooted to the floor and watched her leave. Aching to go after her, he turned to the coffeepot and poured himself a mug. Cup in hand, he walked to the living room to survey her late-night work and wondered what kept her awake.

  He flipped the switch and the lights came on. It didn’t take but a quick look to see that a soft pale yellow had transformed the once-ugly space. The white casings around the tall windows stood out and made them appear even larger. With the furniture draped in the tarps he’d found in the garage earlier, the room looked unfinished, but better for not having to look at the hideous sofas and chairs. Lisa had the worst taste, but Noah liked Roxy’s. He hoped she got rid of the furniture and bought something that suited the house and was comfortable and nice to look at.

  Noah turned and started up the stairs.

  Did she know how deeply that kiss affected him? He had a hard time not going after her, crawling into her bed and making love to her until his body was sated and she wasn’t his every waking thought. Maybe then she’d stop haunting his dreams.

  Probably not.

  Somehow he knew once with Roxy would never be enough. Like a drug, she’d worked her way into his system and he needed more.

  The office was dark, except for the glow from both her laptops. He flipped the switch and walked to the big desk. The stack of mail and papers he’d left her had been sorted, but it didn’t look like she’d done anything with them. Yet. If she didn’t get to them soon, he’d have to have a word with her. She needed to pull her weight. He needed to be able to trust her to keep up with the accounts and orders.

  He walked around to John’s chair and stared down at the screens. No pictures of a boyfriend. He shoved the relief out of his mind. One screensaver showed a sorrel horse with a golden mane. The other displayed a profusion of blooms in an overgrown garden surrounding what appeared to be a gray stone castle. The colors were brilliant, and the scene, nothing short of breathtaking.

  Annabelle’s words came back to him—she hates the desert.

  “Maybe John did bring you here for a reason. Did he want to pay you back for leaving you? Or did he want to take you away from something and this was the only way?”

  Noah thought about that off and on all day. He ran the brush over his horse, thinking about Roxy and the horse on her screensaver. One from this ranch?

  How come he didn’t know John sent them to her?

  Some of the men working nearby stopped what they were doing and stared out the barn doors. The whispers and nudges started. Roxy must be on her way down. He’d heard the men speculating about her, talking trash, and taking bets who’d get the first date. He’d stayed out of it and let them have their fun. One thing he knew for certain, none of them was going to touch his woman.

  The brush in his hand stopped midstroke and he stood tall and stared into nothing, completely taken off guard at that one simple, yet so complicated thought.

  When the hell did she go from being a thorn in his side to his woman?

  With a lick of his lips, he remembered the kiss, her taste, the way his insides melted with that simple press of lips. Something had shifted in him. Softened.

  But did she feel the same way?

  She’d warned him that giving in to their attraction would complicate things and potentially make it impossible to work together. But if she started dating someone on the ranch, he didn’t know what he’d do, but it wouldn’t be good.

  As she passed several hands and they stood taller and smiled at her, he wanted to punch every single one of them in the face. He had an unreasonable need to fire them all.

  He wanted to keep every other man away from her, so he could keep her for himself.

  He wasn’t a possessive guy. Until now. And he didn’t like it. Because it made him feel irrational and on edge.

  She walked up to him and he glared down at her, unsettled that she’d tied him in knots without doing a damn thing except walk into the stables.

  If she knew how much he wanted her, thought of her, the effect she had on him, she didn’t show any satisfaction at his torment. Instead, she matched his mood.

  “What now?” She glared right back at him.

  “Shouldn’t you be up at the house doing the paperwork you keep putting off?”

  Every man on the ranch had found a reason to be in the barn in the last two minutes. They had an audience, all of which had their eyes plastered to Roxy’s ass as she stood in front of him, looking defiant and pissed. He had to admit, he loved it when her eyes flashed fire like that.

  “Looks like the boss isn’t happy about having to give over half the ranch to get a piece of that fine ass,” someone whispered, but not low enough.

  Roxy’s eyes went cold.

  She handed him a folder stuffed full of bills attached to checks she’d made out from the ranch account. He’d been so focused on her, he hadn’t even seen the papers.

  “Sign those. I’ll send them out.”

  He took the folder and the pen she offered. While he stood by a cabinet, double-checking all her work and signing the checks, she took up the brush he set down and stroked his horse. Damn if the creatur
e didn’t nibble at her hair and nuzzle her neck when she came close.

  I’m jealous of a horse.

  “Want to go for a ride?” Harry asked, and even Noah heard the innuendo. The only thing Harry wanted Roxy to ride was him.

  “She’s got work to do up at the house.” Noah gave Harry a look that had him backing off instantly.

  Roxy didn’t say a word and ignored them both and kept brushing the horse.

  “Aw, come on, give a guy a chance.”

  Noah stepped away from the papers and stood in front of Harry, hands fisted at his sides so he didn’t wrap them around the asshole’s throat. “You’d do well to remember who she is.”

  “Oh, I know exactly what she is.” Harry’s wolfish grin matched the light of lust in his eyes. He stepped aside, rubbed his hands together, and stared at Roxy’s backside. “I look forward to working with her.”

  The others looking on chuckled at Harry’s blatant attempt to get Roxy’s attention.

  Noah caught the glare Roxy shot at the men over her shoulder.

  All of the gathered guys laughed.

  Something was going on here, but he had no idea what, which pissed him off more because he didn’t like these guys making Roxy feel uncomfortable.

  “Get back to work!” Everyone started and bumped into each other as they quickly cleared out.

  Noah turned to Roxy. “I don’t know what’s gotten into them. I knew having you around might cause some trouble at first, but this was just . . . strange.”

  “Yeah.” She rolled her eyes. “Strange. Just sign the checks. Don’t worry about them. I can handle it.”

  “I guess you’re used to guys hitting on you. But still, if anyone gives you a hard time, let me know. I’ll take care of it.”

  “I can take care of myself.”

  John’s words slammed into his mind. “Take care of her. She’s never had anyone.”

  He took a step toward her and she stepped back. He kept moving and she retreated, until her back hit the stall door.

  “I made a promise.”

  Her eyes went wide and watchful. “What promise?”

  “A promise I intend to keep. If the guys get out of hand, you don’t have to put up with it, or deal with it alone.”

  “Do you mean that? You’ll be on my side?”

  The intense look on her face and the trace of hope in her eyes had him answering with an earnest “Always.”

  He cupped her face in his hands and brushed his mouth against hers, like this morning. This time, he didn’t hold back, but took the kiss deep when she opened to him. He swept his tongue inside, tasted the apple juice he knew she favored and her. God, she was so sweet. He kept the kiss slow, feeling the shyness he’d felt in her this morning, too, slowly evaporate. Her hands skimmed up his sides and around his back to his shoulders. She moved closer and sank into him.

  He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him. Her breasts pressed to his chest, and he tried not to crush her, but he needed her closer. Their tongues tangled together and he traced her bottom lip. She sighed his name and he dived in for more. He slid his hands over her back, pressing her close. He found the hem of her shirt and slipped his hands beneath to her warm, smooth skin, dragging them up her spine.

  Her hands pressed to his chest and she pushed him away, but he didn’t let her go.

  “Noah, stop.” She shoved his hands off her sides and yanked her shirt down. “Enough.”

  He hadn’t realized he was about to drag her shirt off over her head in the middle of the barn where anyone could see them. He stepped close and slid his hands over her sides and held her hips. “I’m sorry. I got carried away. My brain shuts off when I’m near you,” he admitted.

  “I noticed. This isn’t the time or place.” She turned her head to stare down the long aisle between the stalls. He followed her gaze and saw one of his men, Harry again, standing down a ways watching them. “Please, sign the checks.”

  Without another word, he stepped away and went through the checks, verifying them against the many bills and signing them. When he got to the feed store, he checked the bill twice before turning back to her. “The check is twenty-five percent less than the actual bill, but you’ve noted a change in the price on several of the items.”

  “They’ve been overcharging the ranch. I called and negotiated a new rate.”

  He tipped his head and narrowed his gaze. “I’ve haggled with the manager a dozen times and he never budged. How did you do this?”

  “I told him that I could order the supplies online from a supplier in Vegas, who’d charge me the same as he’s charging the ranch for the same supplies with shipping.”

  “You bluffed?” he asked astonished.

  “Hell no. I buy the feed for my horses from a very reputable supplier. I’ve established a relationship with them. They’d not only supply my ranch, but this one and be happy to take my business.”

  “I’ll bet,” he said offhand, making her glare. “I just meant you’re beautiful, and your voice . . . I bet old Mr. Cooper at the feed store kept you on the line just to listen to you.”

  Her lips pressed into an irritated line. “So I get my way because of the way I look and sound, not because I gave him a sound argument for giving us a fair price?”

  “Um, I . . .” He didn’t know what to say, because he’d jammed his whole foot in his mouth.

  “Sign the damn checks.”

  Two things occurred to him. Whatever ground he’d gained in getting closer to her, he’d lost. And although she had to know how beautiful she was, this wasn’t the first time someone attributed her accomplishments to her looks and not her smarts.

  “Roxy, I’m sorry.” He held up the updated bill. “I appreciate that you took the initiative and saved the ranch money. You did a really good job.”

  “I can’t help the way I look.” Her soft voice drifted off as if she were telling a secret to the wind.

  No, she couldn’t. And it made him think. She never dressed to show off. Her clothes fit her well, but they weren’t revealing.

  Roxy didn’t put herself on display, yet she drew every man’s eye because she was just naturally beautiful from her heart-shaped face down to her long, toned legs.

  “You don’t use your looks to your advantage. I’m sure in most situations you don’t have to. You know I want you.” His blunt statement made her cheeks pink with embarrassment. “Some women would take advantage of that and use their body to get me to fall in line. Not you. When I kiss you, you hesitate for a split second, and then it’s like you give yourself permission to give in, let go, and you fall into me. It’s sexy as hell and makes me want you even more.”

  Lost in thought, trying to put his words together to tell her how special those intimate moments between them felt, he didn’t notice how still she went.

  “There’s confidence in the way you carry yourself. You know who you are and you don’t apologize for it. You stand up for yourself and others. Look at the way you sized up Lisa and took on being Annabelle’s guardian. I have no doubt you’ll protect her from any threat, including any to her sweet heart. You took one look at Annabelle and saw yourself. I don’t know what your life was like with your mother. I’d like to know everything about that and you. But whatever you’ve been through, it’s made you strong and independent.”

  “Stop.”

  “I’m just getting started. I know those things about you, but there’s so much more I have yet to discover. And I will, because you live here now. And you’re right, we need to learn to work together and trust each other. So I want you to know, I see more than the gorgeous package, Roxy. I see you.”

  Tears glistened in her eyes. “You say that now, but when you find out all those things you want to know and about my mother, you’ll change your mind.”

  “Nothing will make me see you any different than I see you right now.”

  The look in her eyes was so raw and pleading and miserable. He read the resignation that despite his words to
the contrary, there would come a time when he’d forget this moment and see her in a different light.

  He didn’t understand completely, but he knew she was hiding something and it had everything to do with her mother.

  To seal his vow to remember this moment, he slipped his hand behind her head, drew her close, and brushed his lips over hers. He took the kiss deeper, trying to erase whatever it was that cast a shadow over her life and made her so unwilling to release control to the point that she had to consciously let her walls down and step into his arms.

  He trailed kisses along her jaw, kissed her cheek, her nose, and her forehead. She stepped away, but kept her hands at his waist, gripped in his shirt. Progress. She didn’t put more than a small space between them.

  “Please, Noah. Sign the checks.”

  “Retreating,” he teased to coax her out of her somber mood.

  “Catching my breath. You’re easy to deal with when you’re running cold, but hot, you’re a handful.”

  “Honey, I’m just warming up.”

  “Lord help me.” The unshed tears washed away and she finally smiled.

  He needed to see the light come back into her eyes, because seeing her near tears tore at him. If she actually cried, it might break him in two.

  “Noah! He’s about to jump,” one of the men shouted from a nearby stall.

  “Shit.” Noah made a run for the stall door, grabbing a rope on his way. He ran through the stall to the outside corral just as his nemesis jumped the fence and made a run for it across the pasture. Before he could make another move, Roxy came flying out of the barn doors on his horse, riding bareback, a rope in one hand. She chased the beast down, jumping the next fence no more than five strides behind him. Before Houdini made it to the next fence, she roped him in, an expert move that thoroughly impressed him and the men who’d gathered to watch her fly across the pasture, her black hair streaming out behind her like the horse’s tail.