Love Like Crazy (Crazy Love Book 1)

by Carmen DeSousa

  Tears poured down her face relentlessly, causing a stitch in my heart. My eyes started to sting, so I had to go. I couldn’t cry in front of her again. I’d get through these two months and then we’d have the summer, and then there’d be an even longer separation, but we would make it.

  I hoped. And just that brief doubt caused me to remain awake all night.

  As John requested, I met Kayla and him for breakfast.

  Kayla’s eyes were bloodshot, and her hair was escaping its ponytail as though she’d rolled out of bed. Light purplish shadows sat beneath her eyes. It looked like she hadn’t slept a wink all night. Of course, who was I to talk? I probably looked like a walking zombie.

  We didn’t discuss much over breakfast, mostly stupid things like the weather and what work I would have in store for me tomorrow.

  John questioned me about all the other things I knew how to do, and I was proud to admit that when it came to construction, my dad had taught me practically everything.

  Seemingly impressed, John nodded as he pushed back from the table and headed for the register.

  I scooped up Kayla’s hand and led her toward the exit. “Please don’t be sad, baby. I hate to see you so upset.”

  Kayla forced her lips upward, then leaned against my shoulder, effectively cutting off my view of her face. She hadn’t said two words over breakfast. Concerned that she’d start crying inside the restaurant, I escorted her to John’s truck.

  After paying, John met us outside. “It’s good that your father taught you all about construction. Really saves money when you don’t have to call someone to fix a toilet or leaky faucet. It amazes me how many young men nowadays don’t even own a toolbox.”

  I nodded. “Yes, sir. That’s what my father said.”

  John shook his head and offered me his hand, but as the last few times, pulled me in for a half-hug. “Call me John, please. It sounds so formal you calling me sir.” John touched Kayla on the shoulder. “I have a couple emails to return before we start driving, so take a few minutes and say goodbye.”

  Although I felt uncomfortable with Kayla’s father so close, I needed to kiss her one more time. I closed my eyes and concentrated on the texture of her lips, the way they molded to mine, the sweet scent of her freshly washed hair, and even the salt from her tears, so I could replay it over and over.

  “I love you, Kayla.”

  She nodded, biting down on her lip, then wrapped her arms around my waist. “Why does it hurt so much?”

  “I don’t know, baby, but it sure does.” I pulled back. “You have to go. We’ll see each other soon. Okay?”

  She pushed out a ragged breath. “K … I love you too.”

  I pulled her against me one more time. One more kiss. One short but desperate kiss, praying it wouldn’t be my last kiss, then opened the passenger door and helped her climb up into the F250.

  I closed the door, and just like that, she was out of my reach. She waved as her father merged the truck into traffic, but then she was out of my sight.

  As quickly as Kayla had infused herself into my life, she was gone.

  The days wore on dreadfully, one into the next.

  Other than work and school, I couldn’t remember what I used to do without Kayla. My social life nose-dived into oblivion. Not that it had been much of anything before, but now if I tried to hang out with a friend who had a girlfriend, I felt like a stray mutt begging for scraps. And my other friends were worse. The ones who weren’t dating anyone did nothing but talk about hooking up and partying and pushed me to do the same. Kayla and I talked every night, but she sensed my grief. She insisted that I needed to go out and have fun, and that brought on a new wave of emotion as I wondered what she was doing for fun. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust her. I did. I was just lonely.

  Even kayaking, my first love, couldn’t eradicate the ache. I’d paddle out most evenings after work and watch the sunset and long for Kayla to be with me. The subtle sounds of the waves hitting the boat used to calm me, but now the monotonous thud reminded me of how boring everything was without Kayla.

  Wanting to feel closer to her, I looked up her school schedule online and thrilled to see that we’d made it over halfway. I scanned all of the year-end events, wondering if Kayla was in any of the groups or activities. She’d never mentioned any. I hoped she was enjoying her high school experience more than I had.

  Chapter 14 - Kayla

  I moped around every day after school until my dad came home, and then I pasted on a smile for him.

  I always tried to have dinner ready and waiting. I knew he saw through me, but he tried not to bring up the subject of what I should do or where I should go, so it surprised me when he asked me about going to prom.

  “Dad,” I whined. “Why would I want to go to prom?”

  “Because that’s what young ladies do at your age. You don’t have to go with anyone, just go with your friends. Girls can get away with that.”

  “And what about Jesse? Do you suppose he’ll be able to get away with going by himself?” I sneered. I knew my father meant well, but this was Jesse’s senior prom and he’d miss it. How could I go when he wasn’t?

  “I insist you go,” my father demanded, undeterred.

  “Dad! You’re serious? You can’t make me go to prom.”

  “Yes, I can, and tell you what, I’ll pay for everything. Pick out your dress and whatnot, and I’ll pay for it all.”

  “No, Dad!” I said obstinately, and I rarely talked back to him disrespectfully.

  “Trust me, Kayla. Jesse’ll understand. I know you love him. But if you miss these times in your life, you’ll never get them back. I’m sure Jesse went to his junior prom, so he’ll understand. He’s a smart boy.” My father’s tone was adamant, and he never changed his mind when he decided something. “Besides … your mother would have wanted you to go.”

  “I can’t believe you brought Mom into this!” I slammed my chair back and bounded up from the table, retreating to my room. “I’ll clean up the dishes later,” I called down the stairs, attempting to sound respectful. But how could he force me to go to a dance? If my mom were alive, I’d want to go. It’d be fun to shop for a dress and makeup. But she wasn’t, and nothing would ever change that.

  Since I was crying, I decided to wait a few minutes before I called Jesse and tried to explain. Not that he’d be upset. I knew he wouldn’t be. He’d mentioned several times on the phone that he hoped I was enjoying the end of the school year.

  I held the phone in my hand, contemplating how to tell him this ridiculous piece of news. It wouldn’t be like I would go with anyone. I’d just go long enough to make my dad happy, then leave. The phone buzzed in my hand and I nearly fell out of bed. Since it was too early for Jesse’s call, I glanced at the screen to make sure it wasn’t one of my girlfriends, whom I’d pretty much ticked off because I’d been so distant.

  To my delight, it was Jesse. How did he do that? I sniffed back my tears. “Hey … I was just thinking about you.”

  “Aren’t you always thinking about me?” he said smoothly, seemingly in a much better mood than he normally was when we spoke. Although we tried to talk about our days, and how much we missed each other, I always sensed his sadness. Even though he acted happy, I could always hear the despondency in his tone.

  “Of course I’m always thinking about you, but something kind of happened tonight and I’m pretty ticked off at my dad right now.”

  “Don’t upset your father, baby. You have to be the respectful daughter you’ve always been or he won’t let you come to Florida in a month,” Jesse responded, without a hint of concern for my mood.

  Even though he couldn’t see me, I rolled my eyes. Respectful? Humph! How could I respect my father if he forced me to do something so unreasonable? And why hadn’t my boyfriend asked why I was upset? “Did you have a good day or something? You sound … happy.” He didn’t just sound happy, he sounded cheerful, an unusual occurrence.

  “I did,” he sai
d in a singsong voice. “I picked up a few contracts today, but I also looked at my calendar, and realized I made it over halfway, and I haven’t died yet, so I’m pretty sure I’ll still be breathing when you get back here.”

  I couldn’t suppress a laugh. “Ah … see. I told you that you weren’t dying the other night.”

  He laughed back, but then the line grew quiet. “It feels like it sometimes,” he said softly.

  “I know. Hey, you got me off track. I need to tell you why I’m upset.”

  “So, tell me. What did your dad do to upset you? I thought he walked on water.”

  “Hah! As if!” I knew Jesse wouldn’t be jealous, but I would be. I wouldn’t want him to go to prom without me, although I wouldn’t tell him so. That Morgan chick would probably hang all over him. I took a breath, then decided just to spit it out. “Well, you might not be so happy either, when you hear what my dad is forcing me to do.” I paused and pulled in a deep breath. “He’s making me go to prom! Can you believe it? Using his parental powers to make me go to a dance! It’s unheard of. It should be against the law to take advantage of parental authority like that.”

  Jesse laughed. “That’s all? That’s why you’re mad at your father? What’s the big deal? Go. I happen to agree with your father. It’s a rite of passage, something all high school students should experience.”

  “Are you going to yours?” I growled.

  “No, but my dad isn’t forcing me. That’d be the day,” he said through a chuckle.

  “Humph! So you’re just telling me to go, is that it?”

  “That’s not what I said, Kayla. I said it’s no big deal. I trust you completely, and if your dad is happier with you going to prom, then you should go. But will you do me a favor?”

  “What?” I asked, frustrated. Now I was angry with both of the men in my life.

  “Pick out a really nice dress and email me a picture, and then when you come for graduation, I’ll get a tux and we can go out and pretend it’s our prom night. No one will know. Some of the schools run later here anyway. Won’t that be fun?”

  Again … how did he do that? Somehow, Jesse could calm me down in seconds. “I guess so… Tell you what. I’ll get the dress, go to prom, get my picture, and leave. Dad didn’t say how long I had to stay.”

  “That’s my cowgirl. Feel better?”

  “Yes.” I sighed. “But only ’cause I’m gonna see you in a little over a month. You’ll be waiting for me when I get off the plane?”

  “Thirteen-foot gators at the gate couldn’t keep me away. Now go make up with your father and Facetime me before you go to bed. I want to see your beautiful smile tonight.”

  “Okay … and, Jesse … thank you for being so smart. I love you.”

  “I love you too. Call me back soon, okay?”

  Comforted by the notion that I was going to wear the dress for Jesse’s requested picture and again in Florida in a few short weeks, I found one that would match the prom theme but was still casual. I didn’t have any nice pictures to give him when I was in Florida, and all the ones we took were with his phone and I was almost always dressed in shorts and a T-shirt with my unruly hair pulled back in a ponytail or tucked beneath a baseball cap.

  Since it was the night of my prom, and I had no one waiting for me, I also took longer than usual fixing my hair and doing my makeup. I blow-dried my hair until it was impeccably straight and finished it off with a flat iron. I wondered what he’d think of me with straight hair. Not that it would stay that way in Florida. The humidity would have it curling up in hours. I applied makeup, which I rarely did, since I usually had no one to impress. But again, all I could think about was that Jesse had requested a picture of me.

  I hoped that my dad would be home before I left. He was the one who’d insisted I go to the stupid prom, so the least he could do was see me off. A pang of longing for my mother slammed me in the chest. She would’ve been good at these special occasions. It wasn’t that my dad didn’t try; it was just different. Like tonight. He should have known to be here. He cared enough to force me to go to a silly dance, but now when I needed him for support, he was out working, as always.

  It was six. I had told him that I planned to leave at six thirty to meet my friends. Maybe he decided to stop and get something to eat, since I’d also informed him that I wouldn’t be cooking dinner.

  I started down the stairs, feeling ridiculous. “This is stupid,” I grumbled to the walls, something I did entirely too much. But since I was usually home alone, it filled the empty void that used to be my mother. The last thing I felt like doing was going to prom alone, but I needed a picture. As I headed toward the storage closet for the tripod, my phone rang — Jesse’s ringtone. I ran to the foyer table and snatched it up. “Hey!” I chirped, attempting to put on a smile for him. Even when he couldn’t see me, he always knew when I was upset, the reason I insisted he always call first if he wanted to Facetime. The last thing I wanted was for Jesse to see me after I had one of my emotional time-of-the-month breakdowns, or if I’d just finished cleaning the horse stalls.

  “Hey, cowgirl!” he chirped back, his tone sounding happier than normal. “Ready for your big night?”

  Although he couldn’t see me, I shrugged. “I’m ready, but not really ready. I decided —”

  “Well, guess what?” He cut me off. “Our song’s on the radio right now, so if you’re ready early, like you usually are, we can listen together.”

  I couldn’t resist smiling. “I love it when you call like this. You’re so romantic, Jesse. I was waiting for my dad, but I’ll wait in the truck so we can listen together. Hang on … just grabbing my keys and stuff.”

  He laughed as I fumbled for my keys while trying to hold the phone. “Sounds like you have your hands full. You need help carrying everything?”

  “No, I was just grabbing the camera — Wait! What did you say? Was that a statement or a question?”

  “Would you like some help?”

  I opened the door and gasped. Then almost fainted. Standing there, looking as gorgeous as I’d ever seen him, was Jesse. Decked out in a tux, his hair carefully gelled, wearing the most breathtaking smile, he was more handsome than I even remembered. Unable to speak and with my eyes too full of water to see clearly, I stumbled forward, falling into him. His arms enveloped me at once, steadying me. I didn’t want to move — ever. I didn’t want him to leave — ever. We could stay this way throughout eternity, locked in each other’s arms, and I’d always be happy. In Jesse’s arms, I felt like I was in another world, as though nothing on earth mattered. Just us.

  “Ahem!” Just like that, I was back on earth. The sound of my father clearing his throat reminded me that I only had a little while with Jesse. Reluctantly, I glanced up, but I refused to move out of his arms.

  Behind Jesse was my father, standing tall and proud. “Are you gonna let the boy come into the house?” my father grumbled, walking around us.

  Jesse didn’t move either. He held onto me as if his life depended on our embrace. “Surprise, cowgirl,” he whispered in my ear. He pulled back a few inches and I immediately felt the loss of his warmth. “You look incredible. Your hair is different, but I like it.” Then he shot a teasing glare. “And why are you looking so good?” He pulled me into the house and shut the door behind us.

  “Your picture,” I said. “I’d just decided I wasn’t going and was setting up the tripod to take the picture here when you called.”

  “You wouldn’t have dared,” he challenged. “You promised.”

  Chapter 15 - Jesse

  Kayla threw herself at me again, kissing every square inch of my face, ending with my lips.

  “Wow, maybe we shouldn’t go,” I offered, but took her hand in mine and led her back to the door. I was aching to get her alone. “Thank you, John,” I called. I knew he had left us alone, but I assumed he’d want to hug his daughter goodbye.

  Sure enough, John appeared around the corner, camcorder in hand. “Okay, kids. Just a
couple seconds, and then you can leave.” Kayla handed John her camera. “Say cheese,” the gentle giant of a man said as he juggled the camcorder while snapping pictures. Kayla may have lost her mother, but her father was one of a kind.

  “Here,” I said. “Lemme take some of you and Kayla.”

  “Nah! I’ll just look like a big oaf standing next to a princess.”

  “Don’t be silly, Daddy.” Kayla draped her arms around her father. “You’re the king.”

  “You can take my truck, Jess. Kayla’s truck always smells like horses.”

  Kayla twisted the upper part of her body, lowering one shoulder in one of her sweet and silly gestures that I loved. “At least my horses always smell good!”

  John lifted his brow, then tossed a set of keys. “Trust me. Take my truck.”

  I snapped up the keys before they hit the floor. “Thanks again, John!” I didn’t wait another second to escort Kayla outside. I wanted to get her in the truck where we could be alone. I held open the passenger door, then lifted her by the waist into the truck. “Whew! Baby! I’m so glad I’m here. You look —” My eyes trailed the length of her form-fitting strapless dress. “Oh, man! I don’t have the words to describe how good you look.” Not that I ever would have admitted it, but I would have been horribly jealous if she’d gone to prom alone. As fast as I could, I ran around the front of the truck and hopped into the driver’s side.

  Kayla just stared at me, arms crossed, eyebrows furrowed, but I saw her mouth edging up at the corners. “So, you and my dad tricked me?”

  I reached for her hand, anxious to pull her into my arms. “I couldn’t bear for you to miss your prom because of me.”