Only the Lost

by Amanda M. Lee

  “I have a plan,” Aidan interjected, his eyes fierce. “I’m going through that gate and I’m getting her. If you think you can stop me ... . You raised us to take care of her, to protect her. You can’t stop us from doing that now.”

  Cormack was clearly at a loss. “We’ll all go through that gate to get her if it’s necessary. We need to think first. We need to figure this out before we act. We have to ... call Griffin.” He choked over the last bit, and the ache that had begun to dull in the pit of my stomach ripped into a fresh wound. “He doesn’t know. We have to tell him.”

  “No!” Braden immediately started shaking his head. “We have to get her back. Then we’ll tell him after the fact. He’ll fall apart if he knows what happened.”

  “I can’t help that,” Cormack shot back. “Aisling is his wife. He has a right to know. I ... the baby is at the office daycare center. We can’t leave her there long. I needed to run out and I just left her there. It wasn’t safe to bring her to the island and … I just left her.”

  “He’s right,” I offered when I thought I could say the words without bursting into tears. “Griffin needs to be informed. While we’re waiting for him to arrive, we’ll discuss plans to get Aisling back. We have to work together. That means talking things through before reacting for a change.”

  Aidan’s glare was dark when it landed on me. “You don’t get to decide what we do to get back our sister.”

  Braden moved in front of me and met his brother’s accusatory gaze. Nothing had been said, but I knew they blamed me. I could feel it ... and I understood the reaction. It was my fault. All of this was my fault.

  “Let’s take this one step at a time,” Braden growled. “Call Griffin. After that ... well ... we’ll figure things out. Aisling isn’t gone. We won’t let her be gone.”

  If love was powerful enough to bring the youngest Grimlock sibling back, she would already be here. Unfortunately, it wasn’t.

  GRIFFIN WAS FULL OF FURY WHEN he stormed into the gate room. Cillian met him on the main floor and filled him in. Cillian was the calmest Grimlock, so the others assumed he would have the most soothing effect on Griffin.

  They were wrong.

  “Where is she?” He practically spit the words he was so worked up. “I’m not playing around. I want my wife now.”

  Cormack moved away from the computer Brett was operating. They’d been reviewing the data from the most recent gate malfunction, comparing it to the previous instance. His face, usually a master class on aging gracefully, looked craggy and caved in. The loss of his youngest child would likely kill him, I realized. Oh, he wouldn’t kill himself, but he couldn’t deal with the loss of one of his children. Life would simply run him over if we didn’t get Aisling back.

  “We don’t know where she is,” Cormack replied. His voice sounded stronger than he obviously felt. He had realized he had to hold it together for his son-in-law’s benefit. Aisling would want it that way. She wouldn’t want Griffin to feel as if the world was against him. She would want her siblings and father to rally to hold him up.

  That’s what they all intended to do.

  “How can you not know?” Griffin gestured toward the gate. “Is she in there? Is that where she is?” He moved to start up the stairs, but Cillian and Redmond cut off his approach.

  “We’re assuming she’s in there,” Cormack replied, drawing Griffin’s attention back to him as the detective gripped his hands into fists at his sides. “We’re trying to work out how to get her.”

  “How? You just walk across and find her. It seems pretty obvious.”

  “There is a question whether one can survive crossing the gate,” Brett explained. “She might already be gone. If so, who does it benefit for anyone else to sacrifice himself in a vain search to find her?”

  Griffin’s glare was sharp enough to cut glass. “She is not dead! Stop saying that!”

  “She’s not dead,” Cormack reassured him, shooting Brett a quelling look. “We won’t allow that sort of negative thinking. We just don’t know what to do. If we cross over, there’s every chance we’ll never be able to return. I’m willing to do that to find Aisling. However, the rest of you ... .” He left the sentence hanging.

  “No, I’ll go over.” Griffin was firm. “You stay here and I’ll cross over. If we can’t come back, then ... at least we’ll be together.”

  Cormack’s eyes glistened as he shuffled closer to Griffin and rested his hand on the discombobulated man’s shoulder. “Is that what you really want?”

  “Are you asking if I want to be with your daughter? Um ... yes. She’s my wife. I love her. I’ll cross ten worlds to find her if I have to.”

  “That’s not what I meant.” Cormack paused, choosing his words carefully. “If you go over, you could find Aisling and be together for all eternity. I know you would be okay with that. Have you considered what you would be leaving behind?”

  It was only then that realization dawned on Griffin’s handsome face. “Lily,” he muttered under his breath.

  Cormack nodded. “Lily. It’s not just you and Aisling any longer. You have a child. You need to take care of her.”

  Griffin looked legitimately torn. “But ... she’s my wife.”

  “I know. But she’s my daughter. It makes sense for me to cross over. I’ve lived a full life. If we can cross back, I’ll bring her with me. If we can’t ... then you all should know that we’re over there together. We’ll be with your mother. We’ll be waiting when you all ... .” His voice cracked before he could finish.

  “No.” Redmond immediately started shaking his head. “We need you on this side in case you can shake information out of Renley. You’re the only one who will be able to pull that off. I’ll go. You told me when she was born that she was my responsibility. I’ll go over and be with her.”

  “No. I won’t allow that.” Cormack was firm. “The rest of you have lives that still need living here. I’ll go.”

  Griffin looked numb as he dropped his head in his hands and sank to the floor. He was torn between the two most important things in the world to him. He didn’t know the right thing to do. Nobody did.

  I finally found my voice. “It should be me,” I volunteered, causing every head in the room to snap in my direction. I barreled forward before I lost my nerve. “I saw the vision of what happened to the others,” I reminded them. “That was for a reason. Maybe the gate was trying to tell me something. I think ... I think ... I think I’ll be able to get them both back.”

  Braden was already shaking his head. “No way. You’re not going over.”

  “I have to agree,” Brett offered. “Oliver would not be happy if you sacrificed yourself for him. In fact, he would be downright apoplectic.”

  Braden was fervent as he grabbed my wrist. “You definitely need to stay here.”

  “I think that’s probably a good idea,” Griffin agreed, lifting his head and meeting my gaze. There, for the first time since I’d met him, lurked something dark and hateful. “You’ve done enough. I don’t want you to go after my wife. It has to be someone who loves her.”

  My heart threatened to implode at his words. I did love her. It wasn’t in the same way he ... or her brothers ... or her father did, but I loved her. Every contrary inch fascinated me even as I wanted to strangle her. She’d almost become a sister to me. I couldn’t explain that to him. He didn’t want to hear it.

  “You can’t blame this on her,” Braden challenged, stepping in to shield me from Griffin’s anger. “She didn’t cause this.”

  “Didn’t she?” Griffin’s voice was hard. “She knew the gate was dangerous and yet she decided to put my wife in this room. She did that even though there was no way to predict what would happen when the revenants arrived. Obviously they were drawn to the island because they knew the gate was going to malfunction.”

  Cillian lifted his head. “I hadn’t really thought about that, but it makes sense. The gate called to them. Then something else happened and they were cut ad
rift so they didn’t continue with whatever mission they had planned. We need to figure out why they came to the island.”

  Everyone ignored him.

  “Izzy recognized the noise,” Griffin continued. “Cillian told me. She knew there was trouble. What did she do? She pushed Paris out of the way and let Aisling walk headlong into danger. She’s responsible for all of this.

  “Don’t bother arguing with me, Braden,” he continued with a hiss. “It’s true. Izzy chose to protect Paris. She probably wanted Aisling gone. We don’t know that she hasn’t been controlling what happened at this gate since she was a child.

  “Aisling told me the story.” He got angrier with each word. “Izzy heard noises from the gate, whispering, and something passed over. It was probably one of these things. Her parents ended up dead and she survived. How do we know that she’s not the cause of all of this?”

  It never occurred to me that the thing that came through the gate the night my parents died was a revenant. In hindsight, that was ridiculously stupid. I may not have called to the creature but it made sense. All of it made sense.

  “You don’t want to go there.” Braden’s fury was on full display. “I know you’re upset — we’re all upset — but you can’t blame Izzy. She’s not the one who ... this isn’t her fault. I can’t sit back and watch you attack her.”

  “You don’t have to sit back and watch anything, Braden,” Griffin replied dully. “You’re probably happy your sister is gone anyway. This is what you’ve always wanted. You hated her and now she’s gone. I bet you and Izzy had this planned.”

  “Griffin, that will be enough of that,” Cormack warned. “Izzy is not to blame for this. We’ll figure this out. You need to have faith.”

  “I think I’m all out of faith.” His shoulders were heavy as he moved toward the door. “I want to see Lily. Where is she?”

  “At reaper headquarters, in daycare. She’s safe.”

  “I want her.” Griffin was so forlorn I thought I might fall over as the weight of his angst hit me smack in the face. He was a normal human, so he wasn’t good at shuttering. Every emotion was on display ... he would fall apart before the evening was over. “I want my daughter. I want her right now.”

  “We’ll get her,” Cormack promised. “Son, this isn’t over. We’re going to figure things out. I ... we’ll come up with a plan.”

  “I want my daughter now. I want my baby.”

  With that, he walked out of the room without even looking over this shoulder. He didn’t look at the gate. He’d made his decision. He was going to protect his daughter because it was the right thing to do, but the loss of his wife would leave Griffin Taylor a broken man. There would be no coming back for him.

  A quick look at the remaining Grimlocks told me there would be no coming back for any of them.

  Twenty-Five

  Braden didn’t leave with the others. He was steadfast in his refusal, even though I could’ve used a bit of breathing room. He understood we had data to explore and secluded himself in a corner.

  There he sat and stared at the gate.

  It wasn’t much of a stretch to figure out what he was thinking. He was worried about his sister, wondering if she was already gone. He was regretting every nasty thing he’d ever said to her, thinking back on all the horrible things she’d said to him.

  He was picturing the moment on the crumbling balcony. I could see the memory in the forefront of his brain.

  “Oh, that’s not true.” The half-wraith Lily Grimlock turned smug as the sound of frantic footsteps became obvious. “I think someone would be happier if I stayed. Isn’t that right, Braden?”

  Angst rolled over Aisling’s furious face. “You should go back downstairs, Braden,” she said quietly. “I’ve got this.”

  Braden’s tone was hard to decipher. “What exactly have you got?”

  “She plans to kill me, Braden,” Lily hissed, adding a bit of panic to her voice to manipulate him. “She wants to hurt me. Don’t let her hurt me.”

  “I see.”

  Aisling risked a glance at Braden. “She’s not our mother. You know that. Deep down, you understand. You saw our mother downstairs.”

  “That was a trick,” the creature spat. “Whatever you saw, it wasn’t your mother. I’m your mother. You know that.”

  Braden remained silent, so Lily talked to fill the gaps.

  “Think about all the time we’ve spent together since I returned, Braden,” she wheedled. “I listened to all your stories, commiserated with you about how your father always favors Aisling. Do you want to know why I did that? Because you were always my favorite.”

  Aisling’s expression was fierce. “You know that’s not true, Braden. Dad loves all of us. Sure, he spoils me because I’m the only girl, but you can’t possibly believe that he doesn’t love you. That’s just ... ridiculous.

  “He’s spent the better part of the last few months worrying about you above everyone else,” she continued. “He knows how much Mom’s death gutted you. He doesn’t want it to happen again ... but there’s no choice. This is not our mother.”

  “I am your mother!” Desperation rolled off the thing claiming to be their mother. She knew this was her last shot. “You need to let me go, Braden. I promise I won’t hurt the family. Aisling simply doesn’t understand what I was trying to do. She’s hated me from the second I returned, resented me. I’m not a threat. You know that.”

  “That did it.” Aisling raised the letter opener clutched in her hand and stepped toward the Lily monster. “I won’t let you hurt my brother. We’re finished here.”

  Lily retreated. The only place to escape was the ramshackle balcony. It was small, and she managed only four steps before she backed into a wall. Aisling gave chase, ready to plunge the letter opener through her heart, but Braden grabbed her arm.

  “No.”

  “Braden, we have to do this.” Tears filled Aisling’s eyes. “I know you think she’s our mother, but she’s not.”

  “Don’t let her murder me, Braden.” Lily turned shrill and there was a momentary glint of mayhem flitting through her eyes. “I’m your mother. I love you. She’s trying to separate us. If she kills me, she’ll win.”

  “She’s not going to kill you.” Braden’s voice was hollow as he forced the letter opener from Aisling’s hand. “I’m going to do it.”

  Shock washed over the room as Braden grabbed the letter opener and raised it.

  “Braden!” Lily screamed his name at the same moment a ripping sound caused Aisling to jerk her head to the left.

  The rotting floor finally gave way and the balcony tipped forward. The desolate chairs left from better days flew forward and broke through the weakened balusters, causing the balcony to jerk as it buckled.

  Braden pitched forward and Aisling scrambled behind to catch him. Things happened fast, and she missed with her first grab, skin touching skin before he slid further away. Somehow she managed to grab his hand with her second attempt, and even though his body went over the edge she held tight, planting her feet against the balusters and praying that they wouldn’t give and take them both over the edge.

  “I’ve got you!” Aisling gasped as she fought Braden’s weight. He wasn’t large, but he was well-muscled, which made him heavy. “Don’t let go.”

  “Aisling, look out!” Braden yelled out the same moment Lily grabbed her other arm in an attempt to stop herself from sliding over the edge.

  Aisling bellowed out her frustration as she struggled to hold steady.

  “Son of a ... !” She gritted her teeth as she fought to keep her grip on Braden. “Somebody help me!” she screamed, knowing there was no way she had the upper body strength to pull Braden to safety. That was doubly true now that her mother’s added weight worked against her.

  “Let me go, Aisling,” Braden instructed, his voice cracking. “If you don’t, we’ll both go.”

  “I’m not doing that.” Aisling looked determined as she met his gaze. “We’re both g
etting out of here. I’m getting married the day after tomorrow. You’re going to be there with me.”

  “I might survive the fall,” Braden offered, choking on the words. “If you hold on we’ll both be hurt … or worse. There’s still a chance I’ll make it.”

  “Listen to your brother,” Lily snapped. “Let him go. If you do, you’ll have the strength to pull me up.”

  Hatred washed over Aisling’s features. “I am not saving you.” She jerked her arm, grim satisfaction rolling across her face as Lily’s fingers slid down her wrist. The desperate creature dug its nails in. “A parent is never supposed to outlive her child. That’s a lesson you simply haven’t learned.”

  Aisling yanked her arm away from Lily again. This time, the soulless creature couldn’t maintain its grip. Its eyebrows flew up its forehead as its fingers slid down Aisling’s hand. For one long moment — it seemed an eternity — it was as if the monster floated there, accusatory eyes blasting Aisling with a lifetime of hate and disgust. Then it plummeted, rapidly falling out of sight. Aisling didn’t watch the fall. She was already focused on Braden … and there was no need to look.

  Her hand was bloody from Lily’s fingernails, but that didn’t stop Aisling from wrapping both of her hands around Braden’s wrist. “We’re going to make it.”

  “Aisling, you have to let me go.”

  “No! Somebody help me!” Aisling screamed.

  “Aisling!” Griffin’s voice echoed throughout the darkness behind them. He sounded close. The shocked look on his face when he poked his head over the threshold of the rapidly faltering balcony wouldn’t be forgotten. “Baby.” He dropped to his stomach and crawled until he wrapped his arms around her waist. “Hold on.”

  “We need to get Braden up,” she growled. “I don’t have the strength to pull him.”

  “You won’t be doing it alone,” Cormack announced, appearing near Griffin. “Redmond, I want you to hold Cillian’s legs and lower him on the other side of Aisling. Aidan, I’ll hold you. I want you to each take an arm. Aisling can’t hold on much longer. Then we’ll all pull at the same time. Everybody got it? Good. Go.”