by Fanny Finch
Delia wanted to be with her sister, but more than that, she wanted to be away from her station. Having a break, a break of any kind, was worth the pain of separation.
“Would you like to join the Duke and I for a ball on the weekend?” Thea asked out of nowhere.
Delia thought about this. Could she handle it? She was not of their station, but if she borrowed a dress from Thea, she might be able to pretend.
And yet, everyone knew that Thea’s family was not titled. If she went, they would see through her gown and attempts to appear as belonging to them. She could not hide anywhere she went. And what if someone who knew her appeared? Someone tied to her former employer or even tied to the Earl?
It was too great a risk.
“Thank you, but I do not believe I should do well at such an event,” Delia answered.
She saw the disappointment on Thea’s face and wished she could take it back. But going to such an event was not of her ilk. She was not right for balls. She didn’t fit in, except perhaps with the governesses that would sit in the corner with their sherry, wishing they were among the elite.
No, it was wise for her to refuse. It would only make her more inclined to believe that she could be among proper society and that was a fooling thing to believe. She would never be accepted among them. She was hardly even accepted in her own home.
Chapter 24
Doing all he could to remain busy, the Earl scheduled a number of events. He went to more social engagements over the course of the following week than he thought he had ever gone to in all his life before this.
But Miss Caulfield had been gone a full week. He did not know how he could handle another without her. If she didn't return soon, he thought he might lose himself altogether.
Continually, day after day, his thoughts returned to her. Her beauty, her demeanor, her kindness, all of it filled his thoughts.
He wondered if she was enjoying her time in Cambridge. He also considered what sort of family her sister might be married into. Had she managed to find a man with a good job or was she wed to a merchant as her father had been? What sort of husband would Miss Caulfield prefer? A man who would bring her up in society, or a man with whom she could be comfortable and herself?
She could be herself with him. The Earl knew it and wished that she would recognize it as well. But she was so shy and quiet around him that he wondered if he would ever get to know her the way that he wished to. Would Miss Caulfield ever recognize that they could, actually, get closer?
Once more, the Earl became determined. He had to learn more about her when she returned. He had to know what she was like. It was the only way for him to be able to explain to himself why he had become so intrigued by her. It was the only way for him to know if what he felt for her was real or simply his own imagining.
Was he only attracted to her because of her beauty? Or was it all the other things that he continually thought of as well? Her kindness and empathy? He needed answers. It was driving him mad not understanding how he thought of her.
But he still had to wait another week. Another week of missing her, of thinking about her and being unable to escape those thoughts. Another week of wishing that she would come back early and tell him that she didn’t care about their class difference, she wanted to be with him.
Not that a woman of her station could ever do such a thing. The Baron’s concerns had been evidence of that. A governess could never approach her employer and share an affection with him. It was beyond improper. It was wrong.
But was it wrong for him to initiate? Surely it must be an abuse of authority if he tried to express his feelings towards her and she decided she didn’t want them. That had to be wrong.
The Earl could not allow her to be in such a place as to feel that he was manipulating her. He couldn’t bear the thought of her thinking that he wanted to use her.
But he was finally distracted when the Baron Woldorf arrived for the plans they had made for the day. The man was in his riding outfit, ready to go.
“Tea?” the Earl offered, as he always did.
“Yes, please,” the Baron replied.
Before long, Mrs. Andrews brought tea for the men and they were able to sit and relax for a while. They ate a little, just enough to keep up their strength, before readying to go out.
“Mrs. Andrews, please have two horses made ready,” the Earl instructed. Mrs. Andrews nodded and departed, presumably to complain to the stable hands that she was being ordered about as a messenger.
“So how is your governess?” the Baron asked.
“She is doing well. Visiting her sister in Cambridge,” the Earl replied.
“Oh? She is away?” the Baron inquired.
“Yes. Her sister just gave birth. It seemed only right that she should go and visit. But she will return in a weeks’ time,” the Earl answered.
“She is going only for a week?” the Baron continued in his questions.
“Two. She has already been gone for seven days,” the Earl said.
“You have been counting. That is a sure sign of the very thing I told you concerned me. I do believe that she has gotten her hooks into you. Did I not warn you? Or have you already taken a liking to her?” the Baron hinted.
“I have kept count because she is my daughter’s governess and it is very important to me that the two are not separated for too long. I do worry that Grace will not be able to handle another loss of an important woman in her life. She has lost her mother and now her governess is gone away. She does not do well with loss and she should not have to,” the Earl explained, giving a reasonable response.
“I suppose so. But I cannot deny that I still have my concerns about her. You know that I’m right to. After Lord Conmeyer, surely you can see how easy it is for a man to be caught up in the affairs of his household,” the Baron said, using a double entendre to express his worry.
The Earl knew that his friend was just looking out for him, but he was still bothered by all of the suggestions. It was unfair to pin this character on women like Miss Caulfield and governesses when it was the duty of an employer to ensure that he was respecting the women who worked for him.
But the Baron was set in his thoughts and the Earl could not be bothered to continue refuting them. Whatever the issue was, he would move on, knowing well that the relationship between himself and Miss Caulfield had been entirely professional thus far.
“My lord, the horses are ready,” Mrs. Andrews said, popping her head back in the room to let them know.
The gentlemen stood and made their way outside into the fresh air. It was another beautiful spring day, with no rain to speak of. Rare, but lovely.
The Earl mounted his steed just as the Baron did the same. They planned to spend a few hours out, just enjoying the morning and the air.
The Baron continued in his conversing about men having to be wary and the Earl was growing tired of it. Already he could not get Miss Caulfield out of his mind and now his friend was talking so much about her that he could hardly stand it.
“And you? What of you? How has your revenge plan been going?” he asked with a laugh, interjecting into the Baron’s worried speech.
“My revenge plan?” the Baron laughed in reply.
“Yes. How has it been? Have you wounded the man yet?” the Earl asked.
“I have not,” the Baron answered. “I am not a bad man. I do hope you know that this scheme of mine is not in any way to wound him. Merely to ensure that he understands the consequences of his actions against me,” the Baron reasoned.
The Earl of Dulshire nodded. He knew nothing of what it was that the Baron had intended. But he knew his friend well enough to believe that he was not actually trying to destroy the man who had hurt him. Any man would be angry at having the love of his life taken from him.
“And still you have found no other woman who has taken your fancy?” the Earl asked.
“I don’t believe I ever shall,” the Baron said.
“But what—”
Just as the Earl began to speak, there was the sound of a shot in the distance. Probably hunters. Whatever it was, his horse did not like it and the Earl was stunned in that moment when the beast took off running.
“My lord!” the Baron called after him in concern.
The Earl held tightly, trying to pull on the reigns and bring his steed to heel. Instead, the horse revered back on his hind legs, knocking the Earl off so that he landed hard on the ground.
The Earl of Dulshire cried out in pain. His foot had met the ground at an odd angle and he heard a crunching sound upon the impact. The Baron rode up quickly behind him, but the Earl was still groaning from the agony.
His lungs felt as though they might burst from the impact of the fall and he wondered if his entire body had come to pieces. But nothing was so painful as his ankle.
“Call…for the…doctor,” he begged through ragged breaths.
“I’ll be back swiftly,” the Baron promised, riding off to get help.
He was back soon and promised that the doctor was on his way. It was another thirty minutes of lying on the ground before the doctor finally arrived.
“My lord, please, let me have a look,” Doctor Fielding instructed.
The Earl allowed Doctor Fielding to move his foot but he cried out again in pain from the movement.
“It could be worse, my lord. A sprain, maybe broken. I’ll need to take a closer look, but we ought to get you to my office so that I can set it properly,” Doctor Fielding said.
The Earl nodded, agreeing to the decision even though he knew that it would be painful.
After a few hours, he was returned home with his ankle in a brace. Mrs. Andrews practically screamed upon seeing it and fell into an overdramatic weeping.
“Please, Mrs. Andrews, calm yourself. I am quite alright,” he said.
When Grace came to see what all the commotion was about, with Miss Amy beside her, the child began to weep as well, fearing the worst.
“I’m alright, Grace. Come here. I’m alright,” he said, trying to soothe her. Grace quickly escalated and became hysterical, seeing how upset Mrs. Andrews was. She believed it to be a far more serious incident and the Earl could not pacify her.
“Grace, dear, I am alright. I promise,” he said again, smoothing her hair as he held her tightly.
“No! You are going to die like mummy and I’m going to be all alone!” she screamed.
The Earl’s heart broke at this. He had never imagined how she might respond to him being sick or injured. Her mind immediately went to the possibility of him dying as her mother had died.
“Grace, no. I am not going to die. I fell, that is all. Everything is just fine, I promise you,” he said again, trying to soothe her.
“Honestly, my dear. I was distracted and tired. That is all. I was not paying attention. And the horse got frightened. We all get frightened, do we not? So did he. And he ran off but he knocked me from his back. Yes, my dear, it could have been worse, but I am fine. I will not die,” he said again.
Realizing that Grace would not be pacified, the Earl was not surprised when she ran off, wailing in despair. Miss Amy went after her, hoping to calm the child. The Earl knew there was little else he could do. He hoped that with time, she would be calm.
But when dinner came and Grace refused to see him, the Earl knew that he was not going to make matters better on his own. His only option, was to write to Miss Caulfield and beg her to return.
Dear Miss Caulfield,
I trust that you are enjoying your time in Cambridge. Please forgive the intrusion of this letter on your visit, but I fear I must inform you of a very difficult thing that has occurred here.
As I was out riding with a dear friend, the Baron Woldorf, my horse got spooked. This resulted in my being thrown from the beast and hurting my ankle. I am quite alright, but Grace is very upset and I am unable to pacify her. I fear that I must request your immediate return upon receiving this letter. Please come and help me to bring peace for my daughter who believes that I shall die and leave her an orphan.
I thank you for all that you do and look forward to seeing you.
Your Friend,
Mark Collingridge, Earl of Dulshire
Chapter 25
The peace of the countryside had not ceased to bring Delia joy. It was as though every morning she woke up fresh. Initially, she had believed that it would grow dull, but rather she had come to enjoy it more and more each and every morning.
Delia knew that she had only a short time left. She had been enjoying her time with Thea, Edward, and the Duke who had returned from his business and was spending a few days in the home.
She knew well that she would have to return in only six days. While she wanted to go back, wanted to see the Earl of Dulshire and his daughter, she was terribly nervous to do so. She was reluctant to go back knowing what awaited her.
Now that she had finally confessed to herself that she cared for him, Delia recognized that being with the Earl would be a challenge. She would have to navigate her feelings and how they might get in the way of her position. And with Thea knowing her thoughts, she was even more frightened by the prospect that something might happen between them to mar her reputation with men.
Delia had been cautious enough to ensure that nothing else could hurt her good name. But this would be more than enough to destroy her.
She went downstairs and joined Thea again. This time they were in the drawing room and Edward was taking a nap while Thea worked on some of her sewing. She was still rather skilled. Delia had been working hard for years to become the seamstress that her sister was. But she was still far from such talent.
“Here, this is a better stitch for that,” Thea said, trying to show Delia a new method that she had never tried before.
They worked diligently and enjoyed tea all the while. She was delighted to hear that their good friend Margaret would be coming to visit that day.
Margaret had recently been courted by the son of a fisherman who sold his goods in their small town. Delia was excited to learn more of how the courtship was progressing and if Margaret would soon be married as a result of it.
“She loves him so deeply,” Thea laughed. “I always knew that the moment she found the right man, she would be entirely lost to the rest of the world.”
“Yes, she is a woman who is rather passionate about love. Do you think it is him that she loves or simply the idea of marriage that she is so utterly obsessed with?” Delia asked in reply.
“With Margaret, one never can tell,” Thea answered.
They continued to talk about their friend when a knock on the door interrupted them.
“Yes, come in,” Thea called, not looking up from her sewing.
“A letter for Miss Caulfield,” the maid said.
“Thank you, Anne,” Thea replied as the maid handed Delia the letter and departed.
Delia was surprised. She had not imagined to get a letter while she was here. In fact, the Earl and his household were the only ones who knew that this was where she was going.
The letter had been addressed to Miss Caulfield in Cambridge, but Delia still wondered how they had gotten the letter to the correct place. She had not shared enough with the Earl to have given him specifics about her residence with the Duke of Sandon.
Seeing that it was from the Earl of Dulshire, Delia was immediately curious what he might have to say to her that could not wait until her return.
Thea was eyeing her with deep curiosity and Delia tried to ignore it. She didn’t need her sister bothering her with all of her suspicions about the Earl having feelings for her.
When she read the letter, however, Delia stood up, desperate and concerned.
“What is it?” Thea asked, suddenly very worried herself.
“It is the Earl. He has been injured. Oh, Thea, he fell off his horse. He needs me to come back immediately,” Delia said.
“Is he alright? What does it say?” Thea asked.
Delia han
ded the letter to Thea and she read it.
“It does not seem so bad at all. He says here that he is fine. Yes, you must return, but do not fret so. He is okay,” Thea said, trying to calm her.
“No, you do not understand, Thea. The Baron. He is a horrid man. The Earl believes him to be a friend, but he was in love with the Earl’s wife. He loved her long before she married and became the Countess. I have already noted that the Baron is trying to cause problems for the Earl, but this is simply too great a coincidence to not have been intentional,” Delia surmised in desperation for her sister to understand.