Afereki’s deferential treatment of Moanasina in his bar was the first sign Ronan had that the woman he was surely falling in love with – was special, in some mystical and unexplained way. The next indicator came the first morning he woke up in her bed. She lay next to him asleep, her hair a wild thatched tangle spread out on the pillow. She slept with a half-smile on her face, as if she were dreaming good dreams. Or savoring lingering memories of their night together. Ronan hoped so! Unwilling to wake her, he slipped from the bed and dressed quickly. He knew she had no food in her cupboards and he was determined to go buy breakfast in town and have it back before she awoke.
He opened the front door slowly, trying not to make a sound – and almost tripped over the coconut frond woven baskets on the doorstep. What’s this!?
There was a basket filled to the brim with hot baked taro and breadfruit, various leaf wrapped bundles of baked savories. Another basket had young coconuts, husked and cleaned, ready for drinking. A smaller basket held a domed steamed pudding, beside it a jug of sweet custard and a container of coconut jam.
Ronan looked around, but there was nobody in sight. Whoever had delivered the food, was gone. He was still trying to make sense of it, when Moanasina came up behind him and slipped her hands around his waist. “There you are. I was looking for you in my bed.”
He turned to embrace her. She was warm and soft against him, and her kiss was languorous and filled with promise. He wanted to sweep her up in his arms and carry her back to bed. But first…
“Somebody left all this food on your doorstep,” he said. “I was going to buy us breakfast in town, and tripped over these baskets.”
Moanasina didn’t look surprised. “Yes, they bring food every day. Can you help me take it inside please?”
“Who brings you food every day?”
Moanasina chose a niu coconut and pierced it with a knife so she could drink. “People.”
“But why?”
“Because they want to.” She refused to be drawn into his questions any further, and he eventually put his curiosity aside. He reasoned that there was much about Tongan culture and customs that he didn’t know. Tonga had nobles and royalty. Perhaps she came from such a family? He told himself that she would feel comfortable enough telling him more – one day.
It was harder for Ronan to shelve the next ‘unusual’ indicator.
It happened the day they took a shortcut through town to get to the boat jetty. Moanasina preferred to avoid crowds and so they always took trails through the bush, and stayed away from the main road. But they were running late for the tide, so going through the cluster of shops and houses was the quickest option.
Ronan had to lengthen his stride to keep up with her. When Moanasina was in the water, then she relaxed and sank into an easy stance. In the sea she was home. But on land, she moved like she was in a hurry. She strode with purpose and single minded intensity, never looking right or left to admire the scenery. Stroll was not a word in her vocabulary.
They were walking down the dusty street when a woman carrying a baby approached them. Hesitant but still determined to speak to Moanasina.
“Please,” she said with timid pleading in her voice. “My baby. Can you see her?”
Moanasina frowned, impatient and brusque. But she stopped and held out her arms. “Show me.”
Standing behind the woman was a young man – her husband? Worry sketched on his face. He nudged his wife forward. “Go. Show her.”
The young woman took hesitant steps forward and handed her child to Moanasina. She carefully peeled back the light blanket that covered her snug and secure. Ronan tensed, steeling himself for some kind of deformity or terrible illness. But no. All he saw was a tiny human, barely newborn, perhaps only a few days old? The baby crinkled her face at the touch of the light, wriggled and yawned, a tiny perfect ‘O’.
Moanasina smiled the briefest of smiles as she gazed down at the bundle of perfection in her arms. In that image, Ronan saw a life stretched out in front of them. Forever love, babies, a family, grandchildren, forever walks along a forever ocean...
“Born four days ago,” said the mother. “We are fishermen. One day she will be too, god willing. I mean, as the Ocean wills.” Her words died away and the husband muttered under his breath at her, and took her hand in his. For strength. Solidarity.
What happened next would be etched in Ronan’s memory always. Which made no sense because it was the most mundane of things. Yet also, the most epic.
As the entire street stilled and held its breath in a collective hush, Moanasina closed her eyes, a slight dip of her head to the side, listening, searching. The world went quieter still. No-one moved. Birds stopped singing. Bees paused. The wind died down. In the quiet, the distant murmur of the sea could be heard sharp and clear. The air had a salt tang to it. She was searching for something, and then it seemed, she found it. A thread of azure being. She tugged gently and then it came with a rush surging all about them, like a burst of exhilarating white surf. The ocean. It was there, but it wasn’t.
Moanasina smiled again. Eyes still closed as she welcomed an old friend. Then she pressed her forehead against that of the child, and whispered brief words in Tongan that Ronan couldn’t understand. But they were words that had the mother cry out with a little sound of joy, as she and her husband clutched each other tightly. Moanasina opened her eyes then, and gently blew on the baby’s face. Still the baby slept on.
And then it was done. She gave the child back to the couple who were now in tears, and brushed away their babbled thanks.
The whole thing couldn’t have taken more than a few minutes, but it seemed that the day had stopped for a pocket of eternity. There was a crowd around them now and all looked like they were just waking up from a hundred-year enchantment. The crowd parted to let them pass and people bowed their heads, murmuring words Ronan couldn’t understand as they went.
When he looked back, Ronan could see people clustered around the happy parents, congratulating them and hugging. As they continued on their way to the boat, Ronan waited for Moanasina to say something, explain what had happened. But nothing. Finally, he broke.
“What was that?” he asked.
Moanasina was busy with the ropes and gave him a look of puzzlement. “What’s what?’
“Back there? With the baby?”
“They wanted a blessing for their child,” said Moanasina. “Because she’s newborn and hadn’t been blessed yet.”
“Yes I got that bit,” said Ronan wryly. “But why?”
“So the ocean will know her and keep her safe.”
Moanasina continued getting the boat ready and then cast off, clearly expecting him to do his part. But he wouldn’t. Not until he got to the bottom of this.
“You’re doing that thing again,” he said. “Where you’re either deliberately keeping secrets from me, or you think I know something, but I don’t. Which is it?”
“Not a secret,” said Moanasina. “Everyone on the island carries my mark.” She frowned. “Well, almost everyone. I didn’t give it to Tafale and his friends.” A short laugh.
Ronan was afraid to ask what happened to Tafale and friends, because then Moanasina might get sidetracked and never explain to him what she meant.
“So let me get this straight,” said Ronan. “What you did back there to the baby, you’ve done that to everyone on this island? Adults too?”
A careless shrug. “Sort of. Whoever asks me to.”
“And why do they ask you to?” said Ronan.
“This is an island of fishers and the ocean can be dangerous. Whoever I speak for, is kept safe. The ocean knows them as one of mine.”
“There’s several hundred people on this island.”
“Yes. And they are all mine. Almost all of them. The ocean knows this. Niua has not lost a boat or a single soul to the sea and her creatures since I took her under my care. Not only that but they have had good harvest and the sea has been generous,” Moanasina explained.
“There was opposition at first when the marine sanctuary was proposed. And people didn’t understand why we needed to go one hundred percent renewable energy. But now they see. When they respect the ocean and commit to her care, then they’re protected.”
She said it so matter-of-factly. Like it was an obvious truth and anyone who didn’t know about ocean promises and blessings – was an ignorant fool. Ronan wanted to say, not for the first time, that he didn’t understand. That what she spoke made no logical sense.
But he didn’t. Because he knew that she would go silent and put up the wall, an impenetrable coral reef that breathed and pulsed with secrets. As she cast off the rope and set their course for the whale sanctuary, standing tall at the bow, her hair a fierce tangle in the wind, he knew that he would love her through all her mystery. That he didn’t need to know or understand all that she was. He loved her still.
They were in their special place. A cliff-side cave, only visible when the tide went out. It wasn’t deep, just a bare cleft in the rock wall that bore the battering of ocean, day in and day out. She had brought him here one day, laughing with the repressed delight of one showing off her secrets.
“This is where I come to think,” she explained as she swam ahead of him. “It’s so beautiful, see?”
He looked upward to where she pointed and was awed. Instead of gleaming black rock, the roof of the cave was a glittering array of spangled color, that lit up the interior like a magical wonderland.
“What is it?” asked Ronan.
“Some kind of crystal I think,” said Moanasina. “Come here.”
There was a narrow strip of sand at the back of the cave, where Moanasina threw herself down, so she could look up at the star-filled cave roof. Ronan joined her and together they lay for a while, side by side, listening to the gentle lap of water on the rocks, and luxuriating in the sheer beauty of their surroundings.
“It’s like the night sky in here,” said Ronan. He rolled over and propped himself up on his elbows so he could gaze down at Moanasina. “So beautiful.” He couldn’t resist kissing her then. A soft, sweet kiss tender with promise and hope. It deepened though, as she reached up to pull him to her, with a hunger that sparked an answering fire in him. A groan as he fisted a handful of her hair and then they were pulling at each other’s clothing, impatient and searching. For a time, the world faded away.
Much later, they sat on the strip of sand, replete. She lay her head back on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her, and together they looked out over the sparkling water.
“The ocean is so beautiful. I could stay out on the sea forever,” said Ronan.
“Sometimes I’m afraid that I will,” she said softly.
“What do you mean?”
Somewhere in the diamond scattering of black water, a fish leapt, splashed, a reminder they shared this vista with many others.
“When you spend so much time with her, the ocean can make you part of her.” A shrug. “There were times I wouldn’t have minded. I’ve been alone for so long and she’s been my home. They’re all my family. Some days as a kid, when things got bad over there, on land, I’d swim out as far as I could, and then just drift. Let Vasa Loloa wash over me. Sometimes it was hard to find a reason to come back, y’know?”
Ronan’s arms tightened around her instinctively, as if afraid she would slip away in a melt of sea foam right then and there. She half-turned, raised a hand to caress his face and for a moment they shared a look that told of an ocean of meaning. Then she turned away, back to face the expanse of night before them. Her voice took on a subdued tone. “Then there’s the times when I feel like I don’t have a choice. The ocean is powerful and jealous. She knows me, feels my gift, and she calls me. Wanting me to join her. Forever. I’ve never told anyone this but there’s been a few nights when her call is so strong that I go to her in my sleep.”
“You mean a dream?”
Moanasina shook her head. “No. I’m asleep in my bed in the house and then something wakes me, and I’m on the sand, walking into the water. And my head, it’s filled with the sound of her voice, telling me to come that she needs me and that I will be complete and happy when I am with her permanently.”
Ronan was filled with dread, a catch of his breath and a knife to his chest. Moanasina sleepwalking? Out into the ocean? She could have drowned. Been swept away.
“That decides it,” he said grimly.
“What?” Moanasina slipped from his embrace and turned to face him. The crystals lent a silver aura to her skin so she looked almost ethereal. She was so beautiful that it hurt.
He purposely kept his tone light, knowing that too much emotion scared her. “There’s only one way to fix your problem. I’m never letting you sleep alone again.”
She smiled. A shy light of delight in her eyes. “Oh really?” she teased. “You sure you’re not just trying to dolphin your way into my bed?”
“I’m sure.” Ronan reached out to lightly tug her to him, wanting the reassurance of the feel of her. Only when she was enveloped in his arms, firmly pressed against him again, did he feel some measure of security. “I can’t have you sleepwalking and getting into trouble. What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t watch over you and keep you safe?”
She arched an eyebrow at him. “You? Keep me safe?”
“Okay,” he amended. “Maybe not other assorted ocean dangers. Just from land threats. And from mysterious siren calls. I may have to tie you up like in the stories.”
There was a sad look in her eyes.
“What is it love?” he asked. “Tell me.”
Moanasina whispered the darkest fears of her heart. “Sometimes, I’m afraid. What if one day she doesn’t let me go? What if I get lost out there?”
Ronan cradled her face in his hands. “Look at me. If you’re ever lost out there? I promise. I’ll find you and I will bring you home.”
The next months were the happiest of Ronan’s life. He was in love, he was doing work that he loved, and incredibly, the woman he loved was an integral part of that work. They spent their days out at sea, surveying the marine life. If the days were busy, the evenings were bliss. Ronan would bring dinner and after a shared meal, he would give Moanasina a reading lesson. Then they would finish with a jam session on the beach, Ronan on the guitar and their voices melding under the stars. Sometimes Moanasina would dance for him on the white ribbon of sand, and her dolphin family would leap and splash in the star-bejeweled lagoon. Every night he fell asleep with Moanasina in his arms.
Ronan quickly learned what topics not to ask her about. Things like family, her early childhood and how it is that she knew so much about the ocean, how it is that she could seemingly communicate with the whales and dolphins they tracked - were shrouded in mystery. But Ronan didn’t care. They were minor details in the grand love story being written every day they spent together. Ronan could see the rest of their lives together, like a clear line of sight to the distant horizon. They could get their own boat. Work on marine conservation.
To live, love, work and breathe with Moanasina and the ocean was the perfect song Ronan wanted to sing. Nothing could come between them.
Until the day it all came crashing down.
She sent him a message. We need to talk. Meet me at the house at 5pm.
He slipped his hand into his pocket pulling out a small velveteen box. Flicking it open, he eyed the sparkling blue sapphire set in the silver band. It was the perfect ring. Perfect for her.
She was waiting for him inside and as always, seeing her made him light up inside. He went to embrace her and she stood cold and still in his arms.
“Let’s talk outside.” Her face was expressionless. He followed after her and caught sight of a suitcase on the sofa bed.
Ronan was confused. “Are you going somewhere? Is everything ok?”
“Everything’s fine.”
They sat at the wooden table outside and the familiar setting with all its memories gave Ronan confidence. He reached acro
ss the table and took her hands in his. A deep breath. “There’s something I want to ask you. We haven’t known each other that long, and there’s still so much more I want to know about you. More I want us to share. I’d love for you to meet my family. I want to meet the sisters that you’ve talked about. But right now, I’m certain of one thing already. That I love you. And I want to be with you forever.”
He gave her a brilliant smile before going down on one knee in the grass, holding up the ring. “Moanasina. Will you marry me?”
“No, Ronan. I can’t.”
It was the fact that she didn’t even hesitate before saying the words, that hit Ronan even harder than the refusal.
“I understand this is fast, a surprise. Hey I can wait if you need more time to think about it.” He stood up and ran his fingers through his hair in a familiar anxious gesture.
“No, it’s not about timing,” she said, cutting him off. “I can’t marry you ever. Not today, or tomorrow, or next year.”
“I didn’t realise you felt that way about marriage. He snapped the ring box shut and put it back in his pocket. “Let’s just forget I mentioned it and we can pretend this embarrassing conversation never happened. Give my ego some time to recover and then this can be something we laugh about.” He grinned at his own attempt at cracking a joke.
But she didn’t smile back.
“We can’t get married. Because I’m engaged to marry someone else. The marriage was arranged when I was a child.”
“What? Who are you marrying?” he asked, confused.
“A noble from the Tongan royal family. Soon. And I’m going back to stay with my sisters so I can prepare for the wedding.”
Her words were a crashing wave that knocked the air out of him.
“What about us?”
“There is no us. Look, what we had was fun and I’ve enjoyed the last few months. But that’s all it ever was, fun. Be real Ronan. We come from very different worlds. We could never last.”
“I don’t believe that. Many couples from different cultures are able to build a life together. My parents are an example of that. So long as we love each other enough, we can find common ground. We could make it. I know we can.”
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