An Enemy at the Highland Court: An Enemies to Lovers Highlander Romance (The Highland Ladies Book 5)

by Celeste Barclay

  “Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?” Cairren glared at him.

  “No. That’s not what I meant. I meant that while I’ve made a mess of everything, I am trying. I told you last night, that I know I’m making mistakes, but I can at least make you feel good when it’s just the two of us.”

  Cairren closed her eyes and prayed for patience. “But it’s never just the two of us. You don’t think she’ll know?” She blew out a breath in exasperation. “You do not understand women in the least. If she’s not doing it this very minute, I guarantee you she will at some point tonight and every night coming. Myrna will check your chamber. She will look to see if I’m there or if you’ve left. You will not be able to hide this from her.”

  “She’s not like that.”

  “Oh, and you’re not a fool,” Cairren mocked. “Court is filled with jealous lovers and mistresses who spy upon one another. This Greek tragedy is no different than what is played out every night in Stirling Castle. You may desire me, but you don’t want me any more tonight than you did before we met. You’ll bed me because now that you’ve pledged yourself before God, your honor demands you remain faithful. I’m the only option besides celibacy. Besides, you’d never besmirch Myrna’s honor by treating her as your mistress. You wouldn’t dare steal her maidenhead, even though I’m certain she’s offered. Let me guess. She’s even said she’ll find someone else to do the dishonorable deed, so she’ll no longer be a maiden, and you won’t have to feel guilty.” Cairren watched as surprise and recognition flared in Padraig’s eyes. “I’m right, aren’t I? Do you know why I guessed the truth? Because she isn’t doing aught I haven’t seen other women do to manipulate men. But she’s too perfect in your eyes to sin, so leave. This is the last time I will say it before I scream. My father will butcher you.”

  “I’ll go, but this isn’t over yet, Cairren.”

  “You, me, and a bed is. Goodnight.” Cairren opened the door, and Padraig passed through. She pushed it closed before he could say anything else, and he heard the bar drop into place. He sighed and trudged to his chamber, where another night of restlessness awaited.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Cairren waved one last time as her parents rode away from Foulis Castle. Her mother had kept her tears at bay, knowing that if she cried, Cairren would too. Cairren had sworn to Collette that she would never let the Munros see her cry. She would never show them her weakness. Innes whispered his reminder that if she should ever need to flee, she should head to the Sutherlands. They’d hugged and with great regret on all of their parts, Innes and Collette rode away with the Kennedy guardsmen surrounding them.

  Cairren inhaled a deep breath before turning around. Some people in the bailey overtly stared at her while others were more covert, but she cared not. She was exhausted. She intended to return to her chamber, and if she never left it again, it would be too soon. She entered the keep as Padraig came down the stairs. His hair was disheveled, and he was bleary-eyed. He looked as though he’d barely slept, and Cairren felt a smug sense of satisfaction. When Padraig caught sight of Cairren walking toward him, his eyes darted to the doors leading to the bailey and back to her.

  “Bluidy hell, did your parents leave already?”

  “Aye.” Cairren intended to keep walking, but Padraig stopped her.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude. I overslept.” Padraig ran a hand through his hair, making it stand on end even more. “I had a hard time falling asleep.”

  “That’s a pity. I slept quite well. Good day.” Cairren once again went to step around him, but he caught her elbow.

  “Where are you going?”

  “Where you are not, because where you are, Myrna is sure to follow.” Cairren pulled her arm away, but in time for Myrna to see Padraig holding it when she entered the Great Hall from the kitchens. She cast him a pitying look before walking to the stairs. Padraig turned to greet Myrna, but she watched Cairren walking away.

  “Good morning, my love,” Padraig greeted her.

  “They’re gone, but they left her behind,” Myrna mused.

  “Aye.” Padraig intended to change the subject. “What shall we do today?”

  “Are you actually talking to me?” Myrna batted her eyelashes.

  “Of course, my love. What would you like?”

  “Let’s start with a walk, and then we shall see from there,” Myrna bubbled, and Padraig finally saw the woman he knew, the one he’d fallen in love with. Gone was the anger and spitefulness. He breathed a silent sigh of relief. He glanced back at the stairs once before he left the keep with Myrna. They spent the morning strolling around the loch and even sat together at the dais when they arrived late for the meal and Cairren wasn’t in sight. He inquired later, but she’d requested no tray be taken to her.

  He spent the afternoon playing chess with Myrna and reading in his father’s solar as she embroidered. It was just as it had been before Cairren arrived and turned his world upside down. But he grew concerned when the evening meal came and went, but she didn’t make an appearance, and once again he learned she hadn’t requested a tray. After everyone settled for the night, he went to check on her. He knocked three separate times, but she never answered, and when he tried the door, it was barred. He gave up and sought his own bed.

  And so began their game of cat-and-mouse. They fell into a routine where Padraig caught glimpses of Cairren, but she never joined the meals, and she never lingered in the Great Hall. He had no idea how she spent most of her days because no one seemed to notice if she went anywhere. He only knew that she spent a few hours with Wynda in Cairren’s chamber. He learned that Cairren read to Wynda, who was illiterate, while Wynda sewed. He kept to himself how similar that was to how he spent his time with Myrna in the laird’s solar. Except Myrna seemed to listen only as a courtesy, while Wynda beamed when she told him about the stories Cairren shared and how she adopted unique voices for each character. He’d never seen his sister-by-marriage so vibrant as she was when she spoke about her time spent with Cairren. He was happy for Wynda, and it relieved him to learn that Wynda took food to Cairren, so she wasn’t starving. He tried to be sly and inquire whether Cairren ever asked about him, but Wynda’s smile always dropped as she shook her head. She’d give his arms a quick squeeze, then slip away with some excuse of a chore or duty calling her name.

  By the end of the first sennight, he was driving himself crazy. Never seeing Cairren frustrated him, so he took it out on the men in the lists. He was certain they knew why he’d grown surly and easily riled, but after Denis’s beating, they kept their comments far from Padraig’s ears. None wanted to learn if he would react as Innes had. But at the same time, he felt like a joke before his men. It wasn’t a secret that his wife refused to lay eyes on him while he lusted after her.

  Padraig had heard someone moving about in the passageway each night, and he’d wondered the first couple of times if it were Cairren coming to see him, but when no one knocked, he crept to the passageway. He’d caught Myrna claiming to be going for a drink of water. He wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but he realized Cairren had been right about Myrna checking to see where Padraig was and whether he was alone. She never opened the door and peered in, but he was certain she put her ear to the door. It amused him to picture her tiptoeing down the passageway, attempting to be stealthy, so he chuckled when he’d hear her moving around. She never found what she looked for, and Padraig had convinced himself that he could last without another midnight visit to Cairren.

  But by the tenth night, he could no longer stand it. As he prepared to leave his chamber and traipse through the dark passageways, he wasn’t certain if it was better that Myrna occupied a family chamber, or if it would have been better for her to be on the same floor as Cairren and in a guest chamber. Being on his floor meant it was easier for her to sneak to his chamber, but it also meant there was less likelihood that she would hear anything if he convinced Cairren to open her door.

  His mother had given Myrna a chamber on
the family floor when she first started spending extended visits at Foulis early in their courtship. He’d thought it odd that the chamber wasn’t on the guest floor above, but it had made it convenient for him to steal kisses late at night. Now he realized that had been his mother’s intention all along. He didn’t believe Myrna had anything to do with the room assignment, but he resented knowing his mother tried to manipulate him.

  He made his way to Cairren’s chamber on silent feet, but he cringed when his knock echoed down the passageway. He waited, then knocked again. He pressed his ear to the door and heard movement on the other side, but no one approached the door. He knocked a third time and pressed his mouth near the door jamb. “Cairren, it’s me. Please open the door.”

  A moment later, Cairren pulled open the door. Padraig’s body had its usual reaction to Cairren, but after a week and a half of barely seeing her, his body ached to touch her again. His eyes swept over her as she stood before him in her thin chemise. He had only his plaid wrapped around his waist, and he watched her drink in the sight of his half naked body before her eyes jumped to meet his. She stepped back, and as Padraig passed through the doorway, he pulled her into his arms before kicking the door shut. Their mouths fused together as Padraig’s hands roamed over her body.

  When he couldn’t stand the fabric keeping him from feeling her body pressed against his, Padraig yanked the offending garment off Cairren as she pulled his plaid loose. He lifted her, and her legs went around his waist. His fingers bit into the flesh of her bottom as her sheath rubbed against the tip of his sword. He could feel she was wet for him already, and he wondered if she’d been thinking of him as he thought of her every night. He carried her to the bed and followed her onto it as she settled against the pillows. He’d planned to go slowly, reintroducing her to the passion they shared, but their need was too urgent. She cupped his jaw, and their eyes met for a long moment before they returned to kissing, and Padraig eased his cock into her. She moaned as her kiss grew wilder. She moved against him as though they’d been lovers for years rather than one night. Their bodies found their rhythm with little effort, and they were both soon flying over the precipice and crashing into the waves of ecstasy.

  Padraig rolled them, so he didn’t have to fear suffocating Cairren. As they lay panting but sated, Padraig realized he’d spilled his seed into Cairren each time with no thought of pulling out. He’d always been overly cautious in the past, pulling out well before his release, using his hand to finish what he didn’t dare to do within a woman. He also realized they hadn’t spoken a word to one another since she opened the door. He caressed her back and shoulder, but when her breathing slowed and she hadn’t moved in a while, he looked down and realized she’d fallen asleep. He shifted so he could see her face as she slumbered. It was relaxed, and she looked younger. Her flawless skin and features tempted him to run the pad of his finger over her eyebrows, cheekbones, nose, and chin, but he didn’t dare lest he wake her. She was in a deep sleep quickly, and he realized she must have been exhausted. He wondered if this was the first time she’d slept deeply in nights.

  Padraig dozed, but he woke as soon as Cairren stirred. He watched as her eyes fluttered open and realization dawned on her. He held his breath, fearing she might scream or scramble out of the bed. Instead, she snuggled closer, her eyes drifting closed again, but her hand stroked his chest.

  “I’ve missed you, Ren. Not just this,” Padraig was quick to clarify as her eyes snapped open. “I’ve missed seeing you and talking to you. I’ve been worrying aboot you.”

  “I’ve missed you too,” Cairren whispered. But a moment later, she pushed up onto her elbow. “Why do you call me Ren?”

  “Because you’re tiny and look fragile, but in reality, you’re tenacious.”

  “But they’re songbirds. You don’t know if I can sing. I might sound like a magpie.”

  “Even if you did, it wouldn’t change how I see you.”

  “And how is that?”

  Padraig grazed his fingers over her shoulder, sending a shiver along her spine as she waited for him to answer. “As someone people often underestimate. Someone who will fiercely defend and protect those who matter to you. Someone far braver and more resilient than anyone gives you credit for.” Cairren smiled at him, and his heart felt too large for his chest as the warmth radiated from her and took root deep within him. He brought her head down to kiss her, but before their lips met, she pressed her finger to his.

  “I like it. That means a great deal to me, and I like that it’s special between us. Thank you.” Their mouth fused together as tenderness soon exploded into passion. Padraig lifted Cairren to straddle him. At her confused look, he helped her guide him past her entrance. He watched with fascination as she explored different ways to move with him buried deep within her. When she found what she wanted, her head fell back, her hair brushing his legs as her breasts bounced. He kneaded the globes until he couldn’t resist suckling her. She looked down at him, and she’d never imagined a more erotic experience than watching Padraig tonguing her nipple before drawing it into the satin recesses of his mouth as her body rocked against his. His palmed wrapped around her nape as he kissed his way over her collarbone and up her neck until he nipped at her jaw before finally tugging her earlobe with his teeth.

  When Padraig sat up and pressed their bodies together so that every part from their mouths to their hips melded into one, Cairren felt her release burst through her. She buried her head against his shoulder to muffle her cry. But it was only seconds later that their mouths were searching for one another. Padraig kept her tucked tightly against his body as he repositioned them, so he could watch himself sliding in and out of her slick heat. Cairren’s hands roamed over his shoulders and chest, trailing over the ridges of his abdomen before wrapping around his back. Once more, their bodies pressed together, now slick with their sweat. Cairren tried to slow her body’s response, fearing it would all be over too soon and not knowing if it would ever happen again, but the feel of every thrust and surge of Padraig’s cock chipped away her resistance. Her body went taut, and Padraig couldn’t control himself either. As her core squeezed his shaft, he gave in and release carried them away.

  “I don’t want to stay away from you any more, Ren,” Padraig whispered.

  She was slow to respond, as though she cautiously considered her response. “I don’t want you to either. But it must remain a secret.”

  “I hate that you’re right.” Neither said more after that. There was little they could say that didn’t reopen fresh wounds. It was shortly before dawn that Padraig crept back to his chamber.

  Another fortnight passed, but unlike before, Padraig sneaked into Cairren’s chamber every night, where he remained until the first rays of sunlight threatened to peak over the horizon. While he never slept deeply between their bouts of coupling, he awoke more refreshed than he could ever remember after a full night’s sleep. Nothing changed for them during the day, and Padraig continued to only catch glimpses of Cairren some days, but every night she asked how his day was, and every night she steered their conversation so he never had a chance to ask about hers. She never mentioned Myrna or the arrangement they had. They talked about their childhood and shared stories. They talked about their interests and where they would travel if they could go anywhere. Padraig helped Cairren learn more Gaelic while she corrected his French. They’d created a small haven for themselves, and they both cherished it.

  Chapter Seventeen

  After a month, Cairren feared she would begin climbing the walls if she didn’t escape her chamber for longer than an hour or two a day. When she’d initially adopted her plan to spend her life hiding away in her chamber, she didn’t anticipate how soon boredom would monopolize her days. She spent a few hours with Wynda each day, and they were growing to be close friends. She found the woman bright and witty once she grew more confident around Cairren. The only bone of contention was she would never admit to when Duncan abused her. Cairren knew each time
it happened, but when she asked, Wynda found excuses for being clumsy.

  “I need more fresh air,” Cairren said as she stood by the arrow slit. “Would you care for a walk?”

  “Perhaps another day, but not today,” Wynda smiled. “Mary asked, if you can call it that, for me to make another batch of candles for the upcoming Samhain feast.”

  Cairren nodded. It was yet another reminder that the day Padraig and Myrna had planned to marry was rapidly approaching. She’d noticed the past couple of nights, Padraig arrived tense and on edge. It didn’t take long before he relaxed and was solely attentive to her, but she suspected that the impending feast was troubling him. She didn’t know if it was Myrna or his mother or something else that was causing the problem, but he wasn’t himself. She suspected that in part it was his own unhappiness that he wouldn’t be marrying Myrna as they planned. It made it hard to welcome him when she was silently reminded that she was only worthy of Padraig’s time and attention when they were in bed. Otherwise, nothing had changed. He didn’t care about her beyond their mutual pleasure. He still pined for another woman. The woman he spent most of his day with.

  “Then I shall go for one and describe all the flowers and animals to you tomorrow.” Cairren grinned as she and Wynda left her chamber. They parted in the passageway, and Cairren slipped out to the bailey. She approached the guardroom near the gate and knocked on the door.

  “What?” A guard barked at her. His aggressive response took her aback, but she plastered her courtly smile onto her face and proceeded.

  “Good morn. I’d like to take a walk beyond the bailey wall. Please send two guards to escort me.” Cairren infused authority she didn’t feel into her voice while trying to be polite.