Rush: The Beginning (Black Hearts Still Beat Book 1)

by L A Cotton

  “Go f’ yourself, Goldenboy.” Anger blazed in Molly’s eyes as she stepped forward, glaring up at him. He looked like the typical cowboy; jeans and flannel shirt, Stetson propped proudly on his head, worn snakeskin boots. But what he had in looks, he lacked in southern charm.

  “Easy, tiger,” he chuckled, taking a long pull of his drink. His eyes looked a little glazed, his smile easy, in that liquor-buzzed kind of way.

  “Just go, Josiah. It’s a party; you should celebrate.”

  He advanced toward me, taking the air clean with him. I gawked up at him; Molly scowling over his shoulder. “We could celebrate, darlin’.”

  “Josiah, I really think you should go.”

  He kept coming until my back hit the wall, panic seeping into every cell of my body. “Don’t be such a spoilsport, we’re just talking, havin’ some fun.”

  “I’m not—”

  “Relax, little lady.” He reached out, plucking a curl between his fingers. “I’ve been watching you. The way you’ve got them all wrapped around your finger. But you’re not foolin’ me, Angel,” he drawled the word. “I know your game.”

  “I think she said leave.” A hand came down on Josiah’s shoulder, yanking him back sharply.

  “What the hell, man?” Goldenboy protested to Hudson, who glared at him, a murderous expression on his face. Molly watched on, a mix of desire and concern swirling in her eyes.

  She wasn’t the only one.

  “Hey, hey, what’s going on here?” Colton appeared, forcing himself between the two men, although Hudson was six year’s Josiah’s junior.

  “You need to control your judges.” Josiah scrubbed his jaw.

  “Hudson?” Colton gave the drummer his attention.

  “It’s not the first time I’ve caught him harassing Miss Walker.”

  “Harassin’?” Josiah seethed. “Now let’s not be hasty. It’s nothin’ but a little friendly—”

  “Josiah, go wait over there. I’ll deal with you later.”

  He shot Colton a look of disbelief but stalked away without argument.

  “Evangeline?” The production manager was looking at me now. “Is what Hudson said true?”

  “He... he makes me uncomfortable.” I wrapped my arms around my waist. “But I didn’t want to make trouble, so I tried to avoid him.”

  “I see.” Colton’s jaw ticked. “We don’t tolerate any kind of harassment at Jamesboro County Productions. You should have come to me with this.”

  “I really didn’t think—”

  “The guy is a complete douche,” Hudson interrupted me.

  “He’s also the douche you put through to the final.” Colton reminded him.

  “Yeah, well, I’m beginning to realize what a huge fuck up I made.” Hudson never missed a beat as his eyes slid to mine, shining apology and regret.

  “I’ll deal with Golden, if you promise to stay away from him. You’re supposed to be making us look good, not dragging us through the mud.”

  Hudson tensed. “I fulfilled the terms of my contract.”

  “I know, and we’re grateful. But the show is effectively over, and I know how you guys like to… never mind.” Colton shook his head a little. Their whole interaction was intriguing. Colton was a grown adult, a manager heading up a huge show, and yet he talked to Hudson as if he held all the chips. I couldn’t imagine having that kind of power at the tender age of nineteen.

  It wasn’t any wonder the band had a colorful reputation.

  We’d already drawn an audience. Everyone watching to see what was happening; no doubt wondering if they were witnessing the next Black Hearts scandal. I figured everyone was tied into an NDA like me and Molly though.

  “You don’t need to worry, I’m done.” Hudson’s whole demeanor had changed. His eyes narrowed and brows pinched. This was the Hudson Ryker I’d first met back in Ploughton.

  “Hudson, come on, man, I didn’t mean—”

  “It’s all good, Manners. I have somewhere to be anyway.” His eyes grazed over me and landed on Molly who was as still as a statue at my side.

  “Thanks, for everything,” Colton grumbled, as we all watched Hudson walk away. As if he hadn’t just pulled the rug out from under the show’s production manager.

  “It’s Hudson,” Molly said, checking her cell. “He wants us to meet them.” She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she scanned the room.

  After Hudson’s, and subsequently, Colton’s, intervention, Josiah had disappeared and the rest of the night had gone without a hitch. I’d only stayed for Molly after it was clear Rafe would not be coming. But my best friend had seemed preoccupied most of the evening.

  I didn’t need to ask to know why.

  “You want to go?”

  “Don’t you?” She pouted.

  Did I?

  Rafe hadn’t texted me again and Hudson hadn’t mentioned him. It was almost as if he’d disappeared off the face of the Earth.

  My stomach knotted.

  I wanted to see him again, I did. But I also knew it was probably a bad idea.

  When I didn’t answer, Molly said, “I’ll tell him no.” She stared at her cell longingly. “We can go back to the room and order room service—”

  “Tell him yes.”

  I’d officially become that girl. But I couldn’t leave Camdena without seeing Rafe one last time.

  The knot tightened.

  “Okay.” Molly fluffed her hair, a mischievous grin painted on her lips. “Let’s do this.”

  We left the party with little fanfare. Joelene had collared me, insisting on swapping numbers, certain she could help me, ‘figure out a plan’; whatever that meant. I’d politely smiled and mumbled something about exhanging numbers before we left and then gotten the heck out of there.

  “I think it’s this way,” Molly grabbed my hand and pulled me down the quiet hall.

  “Boo,” Hudson jumped out from around the corner startling me. Molly simply rolled her eyes, unaffected by his surprise appearance. Rafe lingered behind him, offering me a weak smile.

  My heart sank.

  “Wondered if you’d come,” Hudson mused, letting his gaze rake down my best friend’s body again.

  “So where are we going?” Molly ignored his blatant appraisal of her and started down the opulent hall.

  “Is she always such hard work?”

  “Molly is—”

  “Already bored of waitin’,” she called out. “I thought you guys were supposed to know how to party?”

  Hudson smirked at her. “Don’t wish for things you can’t handle.”

  I frowned at his cryptic response, but then Rafe finally spoke. “Hud, man, maybe this isn’t such a good idea.”

  Hudson slung his arm over my best friend’s shoulder, glancing back at us. “Lighten up, Hunter. Besides, Molly and Eva are cool chicks, right? You can keep a little secret?”

  Secret?

  I internally analyzed his strange choice of words while Molly practically foamed at the mouth. “Of course we can.” She stared up at him with stars in her eyes.

  “Should we go?” I asked Rafe, who looked visibly uncomfortable at the fact Hudson was leading us toward the elevator.

  “Eva, I...” his gray eyes slid to mine. “Fuck.” he grumbled under his breath.

  “Maybe this isn’t such a good idea.” I went, ready to move away, to tell him goodbye, but his hand circled my wrist, his touch sending a thousand bolts of electricity shooting through me. My gaze dropped to where he held me, before slowly lifting back to his. Rafe looked down at me through thick black lashes and smiled.

  “You should come. I’m not ready to say goodbye yet.” His voice reverberated deep inside me.

  Truth was, I wasn’t ready to say goodbye either. I liked Rafe. Liked that he knew music. Like that he didn’t push me to do anything I didn’t want to do.

  But most of all, he seemed to see the real me. And I liked that he liked me for me. Not because I twirled my hair and batted my eyes or spewe
d Black Hearts facts and stats at him. He seemed to like me because I didn’t know all those things.

  Because I was different.

  “Okay,” I said quietly, walking a little closer beside him, our hands dangling between us, almost touching.

  “Aww look,” Hudson shouted over, uncaring that we were in a hotel hall where anyone could see or hear. “They’re almost holding hands.”

  “Fuck off,” Rafe mouthed at him and I smothered a laugh. “Sorry about him. He really doesn’t know when to—”

  “Rafe?”

  “Yeah, Eva?”

  “It’s fine.” Our eyes locked, understanding and a million other things passing between us.

  We had almost reached the elevator when Rafe grabbed my hand and stopped me. “Before we go up there, I just want you to know...” he hesitated.

  A beat passed.

  And another.

  Tension descended between us.

  He blew out an exasperated breath. “I’m sorry, okay? I wanted to be there for you today, to tell you how amazing you were. That song was… wow, Eva. The way you laid it all out, it was amazing. But something came up, and I had to...” He ran a hand through his hair. “Well, you’ll see.”

  Something was wrong, that much was obvious. It was written all over his face. But I didn’t have time to ask because their bodyguards ushered us all inside the elevator and doors pinged closed, taking the air with them.

  Minutes later, we arrived at Rafe and Levi’s suite. It was the same one we’d hung out in last night, except now it was full of people. People I didn’t recognize. Guys with piercings and tattoos and faux hawks, and girls scantily dressed in leather and latex, denim and silk. I stalled in the doorway, Rafe bumping into me. “Sorry,” I threw over my shoulder.

  “Listen, if you want to get out of here and—”

  “Rafe, bro, get over here,” a voice boomed over the music, “Kendall has a party trick she wants to show us.”

  Rafe’s expression darkened, flitting from me to the room and back again. “I’ll be right back, okay?”

  “I—” but Rafe was already moving around me, melting into the sea of people.

  “Molly...” I called, but Hudson was already guiding her towards the kitchen counter, the one lined with bottle after bottle of liquor.

  I moved deeper into the room, my eyes adjusting to the dim light, cutting through the smoky haze lingering in the air. People were sprawled over the huge sectional, laughing and drinking. But the guy Rafe approached held court.

  I saw the resemblance immediately.

  Levi Hunter looked even more devastating in person. I knew he was one year older than Rafe, but from the way he howled at something the guy beside him said, the way they high-fived and fell back in fits of laughter, he seemed younger. Almost childlike.

  Rafe leaned down to whisper something to his brother and Levi’s eyes narrowed, his head shaking in disagreement. Then his black eyes drifted out over the room... landing on me. “You,” he barked. “You the chick who has my brother tied up in knots?”

  Rafe shot me an apologetic look, but it did little to quell my racing pulse. Everyone had stopped to see what—or who—had caught Levi Hunter’s attention, the rumble of laughter and chatter drowned out by heavy silence.

  “What’s up? You a mute or something?”

  “Leave her al—” Hudson pulled Molly into his side and whispered something in her ear, silencing her.

  Everyone kept staring.

  Kept waiting.

  I wanted to disappear, to evaporate into smoke and shadows.

  But Levi’s assessing glare pinned me in place.

  “Well?”

  Stepping forward, I sucked in a shaky breath. “I’m Evangeline Walker. It’s nice to meet you.”

  You could hear a pin drop. Everyone waiting on tenterhooks to see how the rock god from Philadelphia would respond to the small-town girl from Lyme.

  “Is that right, Angel?” He glanced up at Rafe. “I like her, bro. She’s got... charm.”

  Laughter exploded around me as Levi and his friends mocked me. Indignation burned through me, tears welling behind my eyes. Rafe threw his brother a murderous look before making a beeline for me, but I hurried away, going straight for the balcony door.

  “Eva,” he called after me as I spilled out into the balmy night. “Fuck, I’m sorry about Levi. He’s...”

  “An ass?” My eyes slid to his.

  “Among other things. Shit,” he dragged a hand down his face. “I knew it wasn’t a good idea to bring you here.”

  “So why did you?”

  I didn’t belong here. It was exactly what I’d known and refused to believe. This was their world and I didn’t fit in here.

  I never would.

  “I wanted to see you again.” Rafe stepped closer to me. He went to reach out for me but hesitated, jamming his hand in his jeans pocket. “But it isn’t like I could ask you out on a date like a normal guy.”

  “You want to take me on a date?”

  He lowered his eyes, looking up at me shyly. It made him appear so angelic. A dark dangerous angel more like.

  “You caught that, huh?”

  “And where would you have taken me?” I moved an inch closer. “On this hypothetical date?”

  “I—”

  “Everything okay out here?” Hudson and Molly appeared. She came over, her big hazel eyes silently asking me if I was okay. I offered her a small nod.

  “Sorry about Levi, Eva,” Hudson added, surprising me. “He can be a real asshole.”

  “Hudson assures me he won’t upset you again.” Molly grabbed my hand, levelling him with a hard look. “But we can leave if you want to?”

  “Aww, come on, babe. Don’t be like that. I said sorry. Don’t leave. Not yet. It’s your last night in Camdena,” he said. “You should make it a memorable one.” Hudson winked at her and she practically melted into a puddle.

  “We can stay,” I said, wondering if I’d completely lost my mind. But it was a big suite. Staying out of Levi’s way wouldn’t be too difficult.

  “Excellent, I’ll get us all some drinks. Molly...” Hudson flicked his head as if she should join him, a knowing smirk on his lips.

  When they left, Rafe let out a soft chuckle. “Is it me or did you get the impression they were giving us some space?”

  “Hudson definitely needs to work on the art of being discreet.” I smiled weakly. “So who are all those people?” I glanced back at the suite. The party was raging on inside, the heavy bass of the music drifting out to us.

  “Groupies... roadies... stragglers my brother picked up on the ride here.”

  “Is it always like this?”

  Rafe’s brow furrowed as he swiped his tongue over the silver ball in his bottom lip. “Levi likes the spotlight. I know it sounds strange, but he needs the attention. It helps him...” He let out a heavy sigh. “Do you really want to spend what limited time we have left talking about Levi?”

  Rafe was in front of me now, his eyes gazing down at me with such adoration it knocked the air right out of my lungs.

  “I want to know about you,” I said with complete honesty. “And Levi is a big part of who you are.”

  Pain flashed across his features and Rafe inhaled a sharp breath, his eyes shuttering. When they opened again, fixing on my face, his torment had been replaced with a note of sadness. “I wish we had more time.”

  “We have all night,” I whispered, the words full of promise and intent.

  Even if I wasn’t entirely sure what I was offering him.

  If someone had told me a month ago, that tonight I’d be sitting in Rafe Hunter’s penthouse suite, partying with the rest of Black Hearts Still Beat, I probably would have asked who the hell they were talking about.

  But like an unforgiving storm, Rafe Hunter had swept into my life and obliterated all my walls. Walls I thought were so strong, so reinforced from my battle with cancer, that I never saw him coming.

  “Go again,”
Damon Donnelley, electric guitarist and one fourth of Black Hearts, lined up his quarter. “Shit,” he rasped as he missed.

  Smirking, I lined up my own penny and flipped. It hit the rim of the cup and promptly fell inside. “And that’s how it’s done.”

  “Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?” Molly plopped down beside me, her drink sloshing over her cup. I eyed her and she groaned. “It’s my third. Maybe fourth.”

  “Are you sure I can’t persuade you to celebrate with something a little harder than soda?” Damon asked me for the fifth time since we’d joined him and another guy called Jack, who I’d learned was a roadie on their tours, playing quarters.

  “I’m good, thanks.”

  “How’d you get so good at this game?” Rafe’s warm breath danced over my neck. He wasn’t kissing me, but I could imagine his lips brushing my skin, the cool sting of his piercing there. My breath shallowed and he chuckled. “Eva?”

  “Y- yeah?”

  His hand slid over my knee. “Come back to me,” he whispered.

  I shook my head, trying to focus. Damon caught my eye, giving me a knowing smile. He was so different to the others. Like sunshine on a rainy day, he was warm and kind and so easy to be around. He also seemed to be pissed at Levi which earned him extra brownie points with me.

  The Black Hearts front man was busy on the other side of the room, entertaining a rapt audience, and knocking back shots of liquor as if it was going out of fashion. With every shot, every clink of a glass, Rafe’s expression grew more and more uneasy, but when I’d asked him if everything was okay, he’d simply deflected by touching me. A slight brush of his hand against my thigh; a ghost of his lips over my forehead. Despite his unease about his brother’s behavior, he seemed completely at ease being with me in front of everyone. And although I didn’t know any of these people, I knew that through their eyes, it looked like me and Rafe were together.

  At least, for now.

  No one questioned it, no one dared to mock or tease. No one except Hudson, but as I was quickly learning, that was Hudson’s MO; to make jokes, usually inappropriate ones filled with sexual innuendo. Much to my surprise, he also had no problem being intimate with Molly in front of his bandmates and the rest of the people crammed into the penthouse. I didn’t want to think about how often he did this, picked a girl to bring into their inner circle, because every time the thoughts infiltrated my mind, I couldn’t help but ask the same of Rafe. I wanted to believe things were different with us, but after seeing a glimpse of their world, how easily the girls offered themselves up to guy after guy, it was difficult to trust my instincts.