MERLOT AND DIVORCE AND DEADLY REMORSE

by Jodi Vaughn

  Guilt stung my heart.

  I felt bad for Carla. She’d trusted a man she’d been married to for most of her life. Not only had he betrayed her, but he had also become a murderer. A monster.

  I shut the curtains tight and relaxed in my dark room.

  I needed to talk to Carla and find out just how much Cal remembered about the night of the murder. And if he remembered me glamouring him.

  As I stumbled into bed, I made a mental note to set up book club and invite Carla.

  With a little persuasion, I could get her to join. And with a little prodding, I could figure out how much they knew about my true identity.

  Chapter 24

  The week seemed to drag by. I had already contacted all the women from book club to let them know that I would be hosting for the second month in a row. Nobody argued with me, and I suspected it had to do with the fact that they all wanted to know what was going on in my life now that I was getting a divorce. Now, all I had to do was try and get Carla to agree to come.

  It was after seven on a Friday night. We had just finished dinner, and the girls were in their rooms. Gabby was reading the new book she’d checked out from the school library, and Arianna was talking to a friend on the phone. It was the perfect time for me to walk across the street to talk to Carla.

  “Girls, I’ll be over at the neighbors’ house. I’ll be back in a minute,” I called out down the hallway to the girls’ rooms.

  “Okay,” Gabby answered back. Arianna did not answer. If she wasn’t still talking on the phone, she had her earbuds in.

  I headed out the front door and down the steps. Instead of walking down the driveway, I walked through our front yard for a more direct path. I glanced over at the failed flowerbed project and noticed that all the petunias were now dead. I would have to replace it soon before the neighbors complained. On the bright side, it no longer looked like a giant dick in my front yard. So, there was that.

  Carla’s mailbox was stuffed full of mail with letters falling out. I bent and retrieved the five pieces that had ended up on the ground. I then gathered up all the mail from the mailbox before heading to her front door.

  I stood on the welcome mat with butterflies in my stomach. I wasn’t sure what to say to Carla. I glanced down and noticed that the front porch had not been swept in a while. The planters on either side of the door were empty of new spring flowers, and the winter wreath of poinsettias and holly still hung on the door.

  That was very unlike Carla. She kept a spotless house, both inside and out.

  I took a breath and pressed the doorbell button.

  I saw some movement behind the etched glass door. Slowly, the door opened a crack.

  “Carla?”

  “Hey, Rachel. Can I help you?”

  “I was wondering if I could come in for a minute.” I glanced over my shoulder at my own house before looking back at Carla. “I have your mail.” I lifted the overflow of letters in my arms.

  She nodded and opened the door wide enough for me to enter.

  I gave her what I hoped was a warm smile and then stepped inside.

  “Thanks for getting the mail.” She spoke quietly and took the letters out of my arms. I took the opportunity and looked around at her living room.

  There were blankets and throw pillows littering the floor. The hardwood looked as if it hadn’t been swept, and there was an odd stench hanging in the air.

  “I would have cleaned if I knew I was going to have company.” Carla ducked her head and hurried over to the couch. She picked up the magazines and tidied them into a pile on the end table before arranging the throw pillows on the couch and folding the blanket.

  I eased onto the couch and waited for Carla to sit, as well.

  She chose to sit in the high-back, plaid chair across from me. Her eyes were red from crying, and her skin was pale from being stuck inside away from the prying eyes of the nosy neighbors. She was still in her pajamas, and she looked as if she’d lost about ten pounds. Ten pounds she didn’t have to lose.

  “I’ve been meaning to stop by, but…” My voice trailed off, and my eyes studied the floor.

  “I know,” she said quietly.

  I looked over at her.

  “I heard about Miles. I’m so sorry, Rachel. I know how it feels to be married to someone you never really knew.”

  “You can say that again.” I shook my head. “I’m sorry I haven’t stopped by sooner. I’ve been a little preoccupied with my own nervous breakdown.” I sighed.

  She gave me a rare smile.

  “Anyway, I just wanted to come over and invite you to book club. I’m hosting it at my house on Monday night.”

  “I appreciate it, but I don’t think I’m up for being around people.” She clasped her hands in her lap.

  “Carla, I understand what you are going through.”

  She looked up at me. “Do you? Miles just cheated on you. Cal cheated on me and murdered his mistress. I have to say, I would choose your life over mine any day.”

  Would she choose it if she knew I was a vampire? Would she think my life was so grand then?

  “I didn’t mean it like that.” I searched for the right words to say.

  “People I thought were my friends haven’t been by to check on me or call. Even my pastor hasn’t bothered to send a letter or a visit. I’ve been cut off by everyone.” She blinked her red eyes, and I could feel another crying session coming on quick.

  I stood and walked over to her. I knelt and took her hands in mine. “I’m here. And I’m not going anywhere. Certain people in Charming are laughing at my pain and reveling in my heartache, but I force myself to get up every day and get out of bed. I put on a good face and dare any asshole to say an unkind word to me. If they do, then I’ll just give it right back.”

  “Like you did to Veronica?” Carla grinned.

  “Exactly.” I lifted my chin. “The other girls in book club want you to come. They wanted me to host it at my house so you would feel a little more at ease while attending. These are good people, real friends who are thinking about you right now. Look at it as a chance to have some genuine relationships.” I leaned in closer. “And as far as your church pastor not coming to see you, I wouldn’t grace the door of his establishment again. You can come to church with us on Easter.”

  “Thanks, Rachel.” A tear escaped and ran down her cheek. “Those are the first kind words I’ve heard since this thing happened.” She shook her head. “I’ve had people ask me how could I not know what my husband was capable of. They don’t believe that I didn’t have anything to do with it.”

  “Then those people are not your friends. And you are going to make new friends.” I stood, and she stood with me.

  “I can’t tell you how much this has meant to me.” She shook her head and dabbed at her eyes with her slender fingertips. “What book am I supposed to read?”

  I frowned. “I forgot.” I shook my head. “To be honest, Carla, only a few of us ever read the book. It’s more about time with girlfriends and wine. Lots and lots of wine. But I will check and see what book we are supposed to be reading and let you know.”

  “That would be great. I might even read the book. It would give me something to occupy my mind.”

  I nodded.

  “So, how is Cal doing? Have you been to see him lately?” I shifted my weight and held her gaze.

  “I see him tomorrow. His attorney brought in a hypnotist. He’s been seeing him for a couple of sessions, but he’s not remembering a whole lot about the night of the snowstorm.” She studied the ground. “That’s the night investigators say he killed that girl.”

  “I see.” I slowly nodded.

  “I don’t know how much longer I can stand to visit him. One day, I feel so sorry for him. And the next time I visit, I want to never see him again. I’m hurt, angry, and…”

  “Devastated.” I offered up the word from my own experience.

  “Yes.” She lifted her gaze to me. “Pretty much.”

/>   “Well, if you ever need anything, let me know. Us single women have to help each other out.”

  She blinked. “Do you really mean that, Rachel?”

  “Of course, I do. I understand your situation better than anyone. Whatever you need, I’ll do it.”

  “Well, there is one little thing.” She bit her lip and studied the floor.

  “What is it?”

  “Would you go with me to see Cal?”

  My mouth dropped open. I wasn’t sure if Cal seeing me would jog any memories of me glamouring him into forgetting the night of the snowstorm. On the other hand, if I went, I could judge his reaction at seeing me.

  “I’ll go.”

  “You will?” Carla jerked her head up to meet my gaze.

  “Yes.” I nodded firmly.

  She threw herself into my arms and hugged me tightly. Shocked by the intimate gesture, I awkwardly patted her on the back. I’d never known Carla to be a touchy-feely kind of woman.

  When she pulled back, she wiped a few tears from the corners of her eyes. “Thank you, Rachel. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

  I gave her one last smile as she walked me to the door.

  On my way back to the house, I kept wondering if I had done the right thing. There was only one way to find out how much Cal remembered, and that was to ask him myself.

  Chapter 25

  “So where do I park?” I clenched the steering wheel as I pulled into the jail parking lot. I was nervous about seeing Cal again that I’d barely heard a word Carla had said on the drive over.

  “Over there. That’s visiting parking.” Carla pointed out the window.

  I complied and slid my Volvo into the space between an old pickup with a missing tailgate and a rusted eighties Camero.

  I killed the engine and grabbed my purse.

  “They don’t like you to take purses in. They’ll search it to make sure you haven’t smuggled in a weapon.” Carla shook her head.

  My stomach twisted. I certainly didn’t want to bring any attention to myself while visiting jail. “I”ll just leave my purse in the car then.” I grabbed my keys and shoved my purse under the seat.

  Carla was already out of the car and I knew I couldn’t put this off any longer. I got out and locked the car. I met Carla at the front of my car.

  “It’s okay, Rachel. I know visiting jail for the first time is a scary experience.” She patted me on the arm. “Besides we won’t be alone in the room with Cal.”

  “We won’t?” My chest clenched. I was hoping that if Cal did remember me taking his blood, that I could somehow get Carla out of the room long enough for me to glamour him.

  I hadn’t planned on having guards with us.

  “They always have at least two guards in the room with him. They say its protocol.”

  “I see.” I tightened my grip on my keys and followed her to the front door.

  The whole jail was surrounded with a high cyclone fence with razer wire on top.

  We walked through the metal detectors at the front door and stopped. There was a line of people waiting for visiting hours to began.

  “Is it always this many people?” I pulled my baseball hat down over my eyes and stood in the corner away from the sunlight. I had worn jeans and a dark shirt with tennis shoes.

  “Yes.” She leaned against the wall beside me.

  I cringed. I was careful not to touch the walls and I was pretty sure I was going to burn my shoes when I got home.

  A large metal door swung open and a guard walked out. He was large with a buzz cut and a scar over his left eyes. Those black eyes scanned the room before landing on me.

  I swallowed hard and tried to hide behind Carla. I didn’t want to stand out but I knew in this crowd I wasn’t exactly blending in.

  Slowly the crowd began to move toward the guard and Carla got in line. I reluctantly followed. The people were walking through another set of doors with another metal detector in a single file line before being herded down another hallway.

  “Any weapons on you?” The guard with the scar stared at me.

  “No.” My voice cracked. “Just my keys.” I put them in the tray before walking through a metal detector. On the other side I reached down to pick up my keys. The guard covered his hand over mine.

  I froze and looked around for Carla. She was already making her way down the hall, leaving me alone.

  “I’m sorry. Am I not supposed to take my keys with me?” I looked up at him and tried to calm my nerves. “This is my first time here and I don’t know the rules.”

  “You need to watch yourself.”

  “Excuse me?” I jerked my hand away from his and stood.

  “We don’t get many visitors in here looking like you. You need to be careful.”

  “Oh. I thought the prisoners wouldn’t be left alone with us.” I wasn’t really worried about Cal attacking me. I knew I could take him.

  “I’m not talking about the prisoners. I’m talking about the guards. We have some dirty guards in here. Don’t be alone with them.”

  I looked around and then looked back at him. “Does that include you? Since I’m now apparently alone with you.”

  He narrowed his eyes and held my glare. He picked up my keys and held them out.

  “Thanks.” I took them and shoved them in my jeans pocket.

  “This way.” A female guard appeared and waved me down the hallway where I’d seen Carla disappear.

  I looked back at the male guard and he nodded. “Go on.”

  I quickened my steps to keep up with the female guard.

  “She stopped at the end of the hallway and opened a door. I saw Carla sitting at a desk waiting on me. Cal was no where to be seen.

  “This must be your first time here.” The woman said.

  “It is.” I looked from Carla to her. “Is it safe to be in there with…”

  “With a suspected murdered?” She deadpanned. “Of course not. But that’s why we have three guards with him during his visits. Don’t worry. You’ll be protected.”

  I nodded and headed inside the room. The walls were made of cinderblock and painted an old funky green color. The doors were steel and once I stepped inside, I almost started to hyperventilate at how closed the space was. I was like a mouse in a metal box.

  “I thought you left me.”I eased into the wooden chair besides Carla.

  “I’m sorry. I thought you were right behind me. I tried to go back out of the room to find you but they wouldn’t let me leave.” Her eyes widened slightly. “You didn’t have any trouble out in the hallway did you?”

  “No.” I didn’t want to the warning I got from the guard. It would just made her afraid to continue visiting Cal. Or worse, she’d force me to come back with her.

  The door opened and I stiffened in my seat. Cal walked out, his hands and feet both cuffed. He shuffled into the room and then stopped when his gaze landed on me.

  I held my breath for his reaction.

  He said nothing. And then shuffled to his chair across the table from us.

  “Hi Cal.” Carla said softly. “Rachel was kind enough to come with me today.”

  “Really?” He trained his gaze on me and blinked.

  “I hope I’m not intruding on your personal time together. I know that you must look forward to your visits with Carla.” I tried to read his expression but I couldn’t. He was flat and stoic. I wondered if he had been put on medication.

  “How are you today?” Carla said breaking the silence.

  “Good.”

  “I heard you had your first hypnosis session with the psychiatrist.” Carla leaned forward a little.

  “I suppose I did.” He looked back at me.

  “Did the doctor tell you anything Cal? Did he manage to help you remember the night of the … accident?” Carla lowered her voice on the last word.

  “I don’t remember.” He continued to stare at me.

  “How many times will they hypnotize you?” Carla asked.

>   I jerked my head toward her. “Wait. They are going to do it more than once?” I felt my eyes go wide.

  “That’s what the doctor said.” She narrowed her eyes in concern. “Why? Don’t you think it’s safe?”

  I could have hesitated but I didn’t.

  “I’m not a doctor but I can’t see how continuing to hypnotize someone won’t have dire effects.”

  “What do you mean?” Carla asked.

  “I mean how many times have you seen people who thought they were kidnapped by aliens after they were hypnotized? I think messing around in someone’s head is a bad idea. Plus do you have this doctor’s track record? I mean does hypnosis even work?” I crossed my arms.

  “But the attorney says Cal needs this to remember.” Carla insisted.

  I shrugged. “Like I said. I’m not a doctor.” I stood. “Why don’t I step out and let you two have some private time. I know you have a lot of things to discuss.”

  Carla nodded.

  Cal looked up and me and cocked his head. “Rachel.”

  “Yes?” I froze.

  “I think you’re right. I don’t want to be hypnotized anymore. I might have to remember something I don’t want to.” His lips curled into a slight smile.

  It made the hair on my neck stand up. I shoved my hands in my pocket and hurried out the door and out to the safety of my car.

  Chapter 26

  The day had arrived for the girls’ soccer games. I had stayed up the night before since I could no longer sleep at night and focused on getting everything ready. I had my chair with the canopy, drinks and snacks for the girls, I’d picked out my outfit, and got my coffee cups ready to hide my blood.

  I would heat up the blood and then put it in the coffee cups so I could sip unnoticed.

  I knew better than to take a tumbler again. Veronica would fuel the rumor mill that I was drinking wine at the soccer game. I didn’t need that. I needed to keep everything looking normal, especially since my behavior had been brought up during mediation.