2. You can work on getting better. Better at presenting the business opportunity, better at talking to people, better at mastering your mindset, better at attracting team members.
Time Is the Great Equalizer
If you consider the leaders in your company or this industry as a whole, they may appear far ahead of you. It may seem like you can’t get to where they are. It’s true that you can’t leapfrog your way to the top in a week or a month, but you can get there over time. Time is the great equalizer in our industry. Work your numbers, talk to as many people as you can, and continue to develop yourself as a human being and as a leader until you bring in five true leaders.
Action Step
Look at the lists of leaders and potential leaders you made in Chapter 8. Who are the distributors in your downline that you’ve been working with diligently yet they’re not growing, they’re just sucking energy out of you. Make the decision today to LET THEM GO. Stop trying to force something that isn’t there. You’re not doing yourself or them any favor by continuing to try to motivate them into action.
Chapter 10
THE BUILD-TO-LAST
MENTORSHIP SYSTEM
Leadership is unlocking people’s potential to become better.
— Bill Bradley
Have an Upfront Understanding with People You Mentor
When you mentor people one-on-one, you must have an upfront understanding with them. During the recruiting and “getting started right” processes, you will already have laid the foundation for this understanding.
When someone first starts, you want them to know that you’ll have an employee-employer relationship for the first few months. Distributors are not actually my employees, but their following my guidance sets them up to succeed. I also want people I mentor to know right away that I’m reliable. Many of us haven’t had people we can depend on, so I want those I mentor to know I’m not going anywhere. I also want to know from them that they’re not going anywhere and that their word is good. I make it clear right upfront that I’m going to match their efforts. They walk, I walk. They run, I run. They do nothing, I do nothing. That upfront mentor-mentee understanding needs to be in place before we start working together.
Be a Professional Mentor
As a “professional mentor,” I’m available one-on-one, not just in groups. I’m available via text, phone call, direct message. I’m available if people want to meet face-to-face. In our weekly or monthly check-in call, it’s me and the person I’m mentoring, one-on-one. I also randomly touch in on a daily basis with the leaders I’m developing. I send them texts and social media messages, and sometimes I’ll just pick the phone up and call. That’s the availability and commitment I make as a professional mentor.
For this to be workable for me and my family, I also establish clear boundaries from the start: when I’m working, I’m working, and when I’m off, I’m off. Today, as I write, I have five young kids at home. My business is set up so I don’t work weekends and I don’t work nights. At those times I’m with my family. I’m structured in this regard, and it’s important for you too. Schedule your business hours and stick to them. That way you’re able to be fully present and energized outside of work, and when you come to work, you’re fully present and energized at work.
Mentorship Time with Your Leaders
I break down my business hours into three categories:
1. Recruiting
2. One-on-one mentoring of leaders
3. Group work with the team
In this section we’ll focus on working with your leaders. On specific days my sole focus is building leaders. When you’re first starting out, this will be no more than one day a week. As your team grows, you could eventually devote two or three days a week to cultivating leaders.
When you’re working with leaders, that’s all you should be doing. You’re not recruiting. You’re not building your website. You’re not working on social media. The hours I dedicate to mentoring my leaders fall into two categories: dedicated days for one-on-one mentoring calls and small chunks of time on non-mentoring days.
In addition to my dedicated hours, I spend time thinking about my leaders. For example, during my morning routine. On days I work with my leaders, I’m particular about getting my mind in the right space. I visualize my calls. I visualize how the day is going to go. I visualize my leaders not as they currently are, but as they can be. Even on non-mentoring days, I still spend time during my morning routine visualizing them at their highest possible level.
Structuring One-on-one Mentorship Calls
I connect with everyone I mentor on a weekly or monthly basis. We meet by phone, video conference, or face-to-face, for half an hour. I schedule weekly check-ins with leaders I’m running with. For those who have leadership potential but are not building aggressively at the moment, we do monthly check-ins. I also schedule monthly check-ins for those leaders who I have already mentored to the point they are running their own teams and don’t need me as much anymore.
The structure for mentorship calls is as follows:
Catching up. The first five minutes we’re connecting on a friendly, human level with a little chitchat. It’s not serious, just catching up.
Transition. When it’s time to transition from chitchat into actual mentorship, I say something positive about what they’re doing and share my excitement to talk with them. It’s an important part of the conversation because it prevents us from getting caught up in too much chitchat and clearly indicates it’s time to focus on business.
Review key performance indicators (KPIs), highlighting the positive, addressing the negative. KPIs are specific, quantifiable, actionable benchmarks we can measure to determine whether or not leaders are on track to meet their goals. Ideally we set a mix of two personal and two team KPIs for a total of four. In the beginning, there might be three personal and only one team KPI because the leader’s team is not yet that big.
Personal recruiting KPI examples:
Number of new customer sign-ups in a week
Number of new personally-sponsored distributors in a week
Number of business presentations in a week
Number of invites in a week
Team KPI examples:
Number of new distributors coming into your downline in a week
Number of rank advancements in your entire downline in a week
Number of personally-sponsored distributors sponsoring another distributor in a week
Number of personally-sponsored distributors rank-advancing in a week
During the previous week, we would have set KPIs for this week. When we’re on the call together, I want to know if the leader I’m mentoring hit her KPIs or not, what worked, and what didn’t work during the week. At this point in the conversation, I address any negatives and accentuate any positives.
Set KPIs for the upcoming week. In the beginning I set KPIs for those I mentor, but eventually they set their own KPIs.
A good ending. I want leaders I mentor to leave the call feeling excited to go out there and take action, and I want them to know I believe in their ability to succeed at the highest levels. I end my one-on-one calls saying, “Tell me again about your vision. What’s your ultimate dream for you and your family?” I want them to repeat that to me each time we talk.
*BONUS* 8-minute audio and accompanying PDF detailing this call available at www.KeithCallahan.com/book.
One-on-one Daily Check-Ins
On days that are not dedicated to working with my leaders, I want to connect quickly. I’ll usually spend 15 minutes and send out supportive, inspirational messages to people I’m mentoring.
These connections are less formal than our dedicated weekly call. These text messages, phone calls, Facebook messages, a quick card or note, and the like, are meant to keep the energy, excitement, and personal relationship going. I continuously let my leaders know I believe in them, I’m here for them, I’m running with them, and I’m not going anywhere.
&
nbsp; Group Mentorship
In addition to one-on-one mentorship, I also work with my leaders in a group. There are two main ways I do that:
A weekly video conference for my leaders to come together, inspire each other, and share leadership principles.
An online social-media forum (currently a Facebook group) where we’re in communication throughout the day, again, inspiring each other and sharing leadership principles.
Action Steps
1. Make a list of those in your downline that you want to mentor one-on-one, and print a copy of my mentorship calls template for each person. Mentorship calls template available at www.KeithCallahan.com/book.
2. Set up one-on-one mentorship calls with the leaders and potential leaders on your list.
3. Conduct your first mentorship call with each leader, setting KPIs for the upcoming week.
Chapter 11
BUILDING TRUST
True leadership stems from individuality that is
honestly and sometimes imperfectly expressed...
Leaders should strive for authenticity over perfection.
— Sheryl Sandberg
In order to develop the leaders around us, we must gain their trust. Following is the process I’ve developed, refined, and use to gain the trust of leaders I mentor.
Our Job Is Developing Human Beings
As leaders of leaders, our real job is developing human beings. Uncovering human potential. Bringing out the best in people. Meeting them where they are and seeing where they can go. Helping them see themselves not as they are but as they can be.
In an earlier chapter, I made the distinction between “a leader of leaders” and “a leader of followers.” A leader of followers doesn’t do the work of truly developing other human beings, whereas it’s the core of what leaders of leaders do. We go deep with those we mentor to develop their potential, shift how they look at the world and solve problems. We work with their thoughts, their habits, their daily practices. We work to increase their self-esteem. We recognize their dormant potential, and our job is facilitating the emergence of that potential.
Not everyone is willing to do the work of realizing their potential. For reasons we’ve explored, not everyone will become a leader on your team. Leaders are rare. Leaders want to grow at a deep, core level. They want to change. In order for you to guide someone through this growth process, building trust is imperative.
Trust Is the Foundation of Successful Mentorship
When you’re mentoring people who want to run with this business, you’ll know. They’re doing all the work, all the daily activities, reaching out, following up, presenting the business. They’re ready to build to the next level. In order to get there, they have to grow as a person. For me to help them grow, I need to be able to speak truth into their lives and have them receive it. This is where trust comes into play. Until they trust me, they won’t be willing to share their REAL internal blocks or receive my guidance.
Six months ago, a distributor in my downline (not personally sponsored) connected with me. Let’s call her Nina. For two years Nina had consistently brought in new distributors and customers. She was earning $250 to $500 a week, but she didn’t have any working distributors on her team. She was ready to take her business to the next level.
Nina and I started one-on-one calls. She was eager and constantly reaching out to me, but not yet willing to open up about what was going on inside. The work we do as leaders is not all that different from being a life coach or therapist, from my perspective. When I start working one-on-one with new people, they’re usually focused on question like: “How do I start doing this?” or “How do I talk to this person?” or “What would I say in this situation?” or “How do I get better at advertising on social media platforms?” They want to know how to do the activities better. What I want to get to, though, is real personal growth. To do that level of work together, we must establish trust. I needed Nina to trust me so I could speak truth into her life. Without that trust, I can’t mentor people to help them develop into the leaders they’re capable of being.
Eventually there was a bond of trust between Nina and me. Once we started talking about what was really going on – her fears, her limiting beliefs, her self-esteem, the lacks and limitations she placed upon herself – everything opened up for her and her business flourished.
How do you know when you’ve built trust with a person? Most often, it’s during the conversation when she feels safe enough to expresses true emotion – anger, sadness, fear, desperation, hopelessness. Maybe she’s ready to quit. Maybe she thinks it’s too hard. Eventually she surrenders. There’s a surrender of the mind to the heart. A surrender of the ego self to the higher self. That might sound “foo foo,” but it truly is a surrender of control. It comes about with crying, frustration, giving up, and then – once someone fully surrenders and says, “I’m willing to do whatever it takes” – that’s when we have the trust. That is when our work together really starts.
Modeling Behavior
Your leadership position isn’t one of title or authority. It’s a mentoring-by-modeling position. You have to do what you say you’re going to do. You have to do what you’re asking others to do. You have to walk your own walk, go through your own stuff, grow into and express your own personal human potential.
Be all in. You have to be 100 percent in, no questions asked, no back door, no escape route, no way out. All in on your business. All in on yourself. All in on the person you’re mentoring. All in on the company you’re with. All in on our industry. You cannot fake being all in. If, in the back of your mind, doubts creep in (and you entertain them), you will lose your credibility and your influence over the people you mentor. They can feel it. They’ll know it. If you look at the best leaders – in business, in sports, in the military, in politics – they’re all in on the mission, on the cause. That’s what you must model.
Be vulnerable. You also want to be vulnerable. You don’t have to be perfect. Nobody can relate to that. Talk about your fears. Talk about your insecurities. When you’re mentoring people, tell stories about how you went through similar experiences to theirs. Your vulnerability increases how much they’re willing to share with you. As you share limitations and areas you’re working on, those you mentor will feel safer sharing worries, limitations, and areas they’re working on.
Paint the Vision
Painting the vision is about getting people to see themselves not as they are but as they can be. Letting them know what’s possible for them in this business. Letting them know how big an opportunity this is. Getting the “leaving a legacy” vision in their minds.
Paint that vision over and over. Paint the vision that they’re capable. Paint the vision that they can do it. Together, paint the vision of what their life is going to be like…when they make that first X amount of dollars. When that credit card is paid off. When they get to say goodbye to their boss. When that extra thousand dollars is coming in each month.
Paint a vision both short-term and long-term – after they’ve passed on. You’re helping them to dream a big, beautiful, bold dream of what life can be like. I help people paint their vision of doing what they want, when they want, with who they want.
Your belief holds the space for their vision until they believe it. At least once every time I talk to one of my leaders, I let him know I believe in him. When I end a mentoring call saying, “Tell me your dream again,” I visualize it as he tells me. I can see his dream and feel it in my own heart. I know it’s possible for him.
My Mentor Helped Me Paint the Vision
On an early phone call with my mentor, Craig, he asked where I saw myself going with this business. I shared that I wanted to make $1 million a year.
Craig: How is it going to feel, Keith, when you make your first million?
Me: A dream fulfilled! I’ll be able to tithe and support causes my wife and I care about. I’ll be able to provide for my family without any worries.
Craig: I can
’t wait to celebrate it with you. I believe it, brother. I know you can do it.
Those words came from his heart. Craig truly believed in me and my ability to do it. Imagine the power of that for me. The power of a mentor I respect really believing in me. Without his belief I wouldn’t have had the courage to go after my dreams.
Never underestimate the power of simply believing in the person you’re mentoring. We all need someone who believes in us.
Consistency
Trust is built over time. It’s not a matter of a couple of phone calls. When someone needs you and you are there, trust is built. When you show up to every call. When you’re present – emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually – trust is built. When you say you’re going to do something and you do it, trust is built.
Day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year, you’re there showing up. You’re not perfect, but you’re there. You make mistakes, but you’re there. You get frustrated with them and they get frustrated with you, but you both continue to show up. That builds trust over time.
Be a Mentor First and a Friend Second
One of the biggest mistakes I see would-be leaders in our industry make is emphasizing friendship over mentorship. Don’t get me wrong, I am dear friends with almost everybody I mentor. We’ve gone to each other’s weddings, laughed with each other, cried with each other, vacationed together. We’ve visited each other’s newborn children in the hospital, like close friends do. But when we initially began working together, I was their mentor first. As a professional mentor, my goal is not to become their friend. That is secondary. My goal is to mentor them to achieve their goals.
Say What They Need to Hear, Not What They Want to Hear
During another early call with Craig, I shared how excited I was about this business and couldn’t wait to start working with him. I shared my million-dollar-a-year vision and all the things I wanted to accomplish. I went on and on, talking about my goals, my dreams, my desires, my work ethic, and how much I was willing to do. Craig listened to me ramble on for half an hour, and then he said, “You know what? We’re in the business of helping people. You just told me all the different things you want to accomplish, all the goals that you want to achieve, and I didn’t once hear you talking about how much you care for other people and how much you want to help other people. To be honest, I don’t even know if you do, because I never heard it.”
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