Hazel
I wake up with an excruciating headache. When I lift my head from my pillow, my room looks like a madman went through it. Or just a girl scorned by her father, best friend, lover… Shit. My thumbs dig into my throbbing temples. Memories of last night evade my mind, and the pain in my gut almost has me expelling the booze still sloshing in my stomach. After I kicked them out, I came up here and lost it. I tore up my room, cursing my dad and Violet. The worst part was when it started to click why Gabriel was so insistent I get out of the house. I came to one conclusion: he knew about them and didn’t tell me.
The fire inside me ignites all over again. How did it happen? And right under my nose. All the times Dad came to visit. Was it for her or me? The calls. The accusations that made me feel like shit because I wrongfully accused Dad of paying more attention to her. The whole time, he was.
I swipe an angry tear away and get up. I’m wobbly on my feet and in need of a hot shower. I check my phone to see I’ve missed a bunch of calls from Dad and Violet. Not a single one from Gabriel.
He denied us because of how wrong it would be. How my dad would take it. All along, my father is doing the one thing Gabriel was too cowardly to admit. I’m so hurt. So ashamed. So…alone.
I climb into the shower, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My eyes are puffy, not to mention my pale complexion. My tears mix with the hot spray as I crumble to the floor, falling apart all over again. By the time the water runs cold, I still don’t feel at ease. My phone continues to ring, but I ignore each call. Violet attempts to call, but I give her the end button. Continuous texts from my dad, begging me to talk to him. I delete them just as fast as they come in.
When my phone pings and I see Gabriel’s name, I debate swiping to delete without even reading it. But I give in and open it.
Gabriel: Where’s your head at, little bird?
I type out a million replies: I’m lost. I hate you. How could you? I need you.
I delete them all.
I climb back in bed and wrap myself in my blanket, hoping it will swallow me whole.
I wake up hours later. The beeping of my phone pulls me out of my slumber. I reach for it to check the time. Shit, I’ve been sleeping all day. Well, depression and your world blowing up in your face can be tiring. I sit up and check my phone—nothing else from Gabriel or my dad, and just a missed call and voicemail from Violet.
I don’t know why I’m such a glutton for punishment, but I press the button and listen to her voicemail. Shouting through the line jolts me fully awake. Her voice becomes low, garbled, then high again. Muffled static takes over, and I almost hang up until I hear the terror in Violet’s voice break through. It’s then I realize she’s not talking to me, but to someone else—our psychology professor.
“I’ve invested a lot of time in you, Violet. It’s about time you let me take care of you.”
“What are you talking about? We don’t even know each other.”
“I’ve watched you since the first day of class. It wasn’t by accident that I ran into you at that party. I cared enough to track you down. Because I knew how special you were. I put in the time. I gave you the proper space and time it takes when courting a girl…”
“This is insane. I never showed interest in you. Slow down. You’re gonna kill us.”
What the hell? Did she mean to record this? Not hang up the call? What the hell is she doing with him? There’s panic in her voice. And every few seconds, she yells for him to slow down.
“Never showed interest? All the times you stayed after class to talk to me! Gave me your number! Danced with me!”
“You got my attention, Hazel gave you my number, and it was just a dance. Jesus, this is insane! Pull the fuck over!”
“NO!”
“Jim, slow down!”
Holy shit, Violet was right; this guy is a total nutbag. My nerves are shot, worried for her. Shit, what time was this? I pull the phone away to see she left this almost an hour ago. Oh my god, Violet…
“You are one ungrateful bitch, you know that! You looked at me with those eyes—those fuck me eyes. Don’t fucking lie to me and tell me you didn’t lead me on.”
“You’re crazy. You’re horribly mistaken if you think I’m into fucking psychopaths. Pull the fuck over before you kill us! Jim, please, slow down. There’s construction and—JIM, WATCH OUT!”
Screams. Shattering glass. Crunching steel. It becomes too much, and I lean forward and vomit.
My hands shake as I attempt to dial her number. It goes to voicemail.
I dial again.
And again.
“God, please no.” I throw myself out of bed and dash downstairs to my car. I call dad, but he doesn’t answer. “Fuck!” I cry. I dial Gabriel. When he answers, I recognize the familiar jazz music playing in the background.
“Are you with my dad?” I ask.
“I am. Where are—?”
I hang up.
I race to the club at an ungodly speed and burst through the doors. Clara is at her position and tries to stop me, but I barrel past and rush into the back of the club.
“Excuse me, miss, you can’t be back here!”
I keep going, passing a long bar until I spot my dad and Gabriel in a private section.
“Hazel? What the fuck!” he pops up, his mouth hanging open.
“Dad, I need to talk to you.”
“How the fuck did you get in here?” I quickly glance at Gabriel, debating selling his ass out too, but I don’t have time. My entire body is trembling.
“Listen, something’s happened. I didn’t answer… I should have, but I was so mad. I’m still so mad, so I wasn’t picking up her calls.”
“Whose calls?” His voice a mixture of confusion and concern. “Whose calls, Hazel?”
“Violet’s. She kept calling and calling, and I kept silencing her. But the last one…” I choke on my own words. “Shit, Daddy. If I had just answered!”
Panic begins to resonate in his tone, and his eyes become wild with fear. He grabs me, forcing the words out of me. “Fucking spit it out.”
“Her last message…she left a super long voicemail. I wasn’t going to listen to it, but…” I lose it all over again and start to cry. “It was her and Jim. They were arguing. She was in his car, and he was going on about some crazy shit. He wouldn’t stop. She kept yelling at him to slow down, then—” I stall, the horrific sounds replaying in my mind. Dad shakes me again. “Her screams…I think they…I think they got into an accident. The voicemail hit the max time limit, and I don’t know! I tried calling her back, but nothing.” I can’t continue. I fall apart in my dad’s arms and sob.
His body starts to shake, and he pulls me away from him. “Gabe, take Hazel. Get her the fuck out of here. Take her home.” Gabriel stands and wraps me into his arms. My dad gives me a quick kiss and tells me it will all be okay before he runs out of the club.
I turn into Gabriel’s shoulder and sob. A ripple of fear quakes through me.
“Your father will help her. Don’t worry. He’ll take care of it.” His words turn my blood hot with anger. I push out of his arms and slap him hard across the face. A few gasps sound around us, and he grips my arm, dragging me away. I fight his hold the whole way to the elevator until he tosses me inside.
“Calm down.”
My chest is heaving, and I can’t catch my breath, but I’m too out of control to care. “Fuck you! How dare you! You knew, and you didn’t tell me!”
The doors close, and I go at him, my arms thrashing out, only for him to restrain me. “You bastard! How could you!” I scream and kick, trying to fight him off me, but it’s no use. He’s a giant and I’m no match for his strength. He takes me by the nape and drags me out of the elevator. Fighting in his grip the whole way down the hall, he pushes open a door and throws me into a room.
“Calm the fuck down, Hazel.”
My hair whips in my face as I spin around. “No, fuck you! You knew. How could you!” My chest
rises and falls in short, shallow pants.
He eats up the space between us, his grip back and strong around my neck. “How could I have what? Told you your father was doing the exact thing I was—falling in love with someone untouchable to him? That just like me, he found solace and comfort in someone he shouldn’t have? Do you think we planned this? Do you think they did? Life is fucking cruel, pet. And in this sick world, people fall for the ones they aren’t allowed to. Your father is just as much of a victim to your roommate as I am to you.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” I snap. I’m so sick of his read-between-the-lines bullshit.
“It means I want something I can’t have.”
My throat tightens with emotion. “But you can have me.”
“Can I, though? For how long? Until we get caught, and I lose everything? Until you destroy your relationship with your father? I’m not your hero. I’m not your destiny. I’m the villain. You’re just too naive to see that.”
The fight in me dies. I exhale a quivering breath, holding back tears. “But I want you to be. What’s so wrong with that?”
He stares at me as if he genuinely has no answer for me. His chest expands, and I prepare for another blow of devastation. “And how do I tell your father I want you too?”
The weight of his words is too much. I crumble to the ground, my heavy tears blinding me. His large frame scoops me in his arms. He coerces my weak legs around his waist and presses my back to the cold wall. “No more tears, little bird. I can’t take it.”
“Then stop causing them.” He seizes my wrists, bringing them above my head, and I prepare for my punishment for acting out. But it never comes. He presses me harder into the wall and captures my mouth. This kiss is anything but gentle or calculated. Gone is the man in control. In his place is a man who demands and consumes. The tension drains from me as I submit to his feverous embrace.
“I don’t know what’s right and wrong when it comes to you. I can’t make a clear decision.” He breaks away, his teeth grazing the tip of my shoulder. Desire floods through my veins. Releasing my wrists, he drops his free hand and slips it underneath my dress and between my legs. His fingers dig into my thigh, and I welcome his rough touch. I wait for them to slip beneath my panties, but they don’t.
“Tell me what I should do? Tell me how I make you mine without burning the entire world down around us?”
I thrust my hips, forcing his hand to slide closer to my sex, yearning for his touch. I want the thickness of his finger to take what belongs to him. Mark me, inside and out. My sex throbs with urgency, and I push up against him, becoming impatient. “Just have faith,” I answer him.
His low, sexy laugh sends another wave of tremors through me. “The faith you seek is the death I’m avoiding.”
“I can’t guarantee no one will get burned, but weren’t you the one who taught me there’s pleasure in pain?” There’s a spark between us that ignites the inferno inside my belly. The way he stares at me as if he’s touching my soul.
“You are and will be the death of me, little bird.”
“Then at least let me promise you I’ll make it worth it.”
The fire in his stare threatens to burn me to ash. He swallows my moan with his mouth, consuming my every breath. His hands are wild, dominating my entire body, and I drown in his fervent need. His fingers dig deep into my flesh, making his mark, and I accept it because there is not a single part of me he doesn’t own.
In the blink of an eye, he drops my legs. He doesn’t give me a moment to gather my bearings and flips me around, pressing my chest against the wall. His front is pressed snug against my back, his cock hard against my ass. A shiver of anticipation travels down to my toes. I’ve woken the beast.
His fingers slide up my nape, threading into my hair until his grip is full, and he pulls back. His mouth claims the skin at my shoulder as his teeth graze my heated flesh. I welcome the pain and wait for him to bite down. The anticipation overwhelms me, and I arch my neck to the side, giving him full access.
“No matter what happens, you will always be mine. Do you understand me?”
“Yes, Master,” I breathe. He tugs harder.
“Say my name. I want you to say my name when I make you come.”
“Yes, Gabriel,” I moan, granting his wish.
His teeth latch onto my shoulder, and I whimper in pleasure. He pushes up my dress, tears it over my head, and strips me of my undergarments until I’m completely bare for him. His clothes are gone just as fast, and he enters me.
I expect his ruthless side, but I get the opposite. Inch by glorious inch, he slides in and out of me, slow and meticulous. With one hand still locked around my hair, the other reaches for my breast. He massages my nipple, then works lower, sliding down my belly and past my sex to strum my clit.
“You’re mine,” he hums, pulling out and sliding back in. “I’m tempted to take you home and chain you to my bed and have you anytime I want. Keep you as my little captive. No one but me gets to relish in your beauty.”
I melt in his arms, barely registering what he’s saying. My legs spasm, and I’m seconds away from collapsing. I can’t handle the slow, gentle side of him. “Gabriel, more. I need more,” I beg.
His low, sexy growl fills my eardrums, sending another spiral of flutters to my core. My pussy throbs for him.
“So fucking perfect,” he breathes, powering into me. My tits rub against the wall as he hammers into me, taking everything that belongs to him. My heart. My body. My soul. Bright lights shoot behind my eyelids, forcing me to hold onto the wall as my orgasm blasts through me. His cock swells inside me, his hot cum filling me.
Gabriel holds me as my body goes limp, giving me a few seconds to come back to reality. His warm breath pants against my shoulder.
When my feet float back to the ground, he pulls out and cleans me up. I am physically and emotionally drained. I close my eyes, resting my head on his chest. I barely register him picking me up and laying me on the bed.
“I probably have to go, don’t I?” I question.
“You’re not going anywhere.” He lies down next to me and pulls the covers over us. “I’m sure your father is occupied, which gives us some time. Close your eyes. Rest, little bird.”
“I don’t want to. I’m afraid this is a dream, and you’ll be gone when I wake up.”
He lets out a low chuckle and kisses the top of my head. “Don’t worry. The only thing you’ll wake up to is my cock in your sweet pussy. I will never get enough of you. Now, get some sleep.”
I inhale his manly scent, memorizing it, and expel a long sigh, feeling safe in his promise. I close my eyes. All the messed-up stuff that’s happened fades into the back of my mind as I fall asleep.
Hazel
Gabriel keeps his promise. I am pleasantly awoken to him deep inside me, whispering sweet little praises into my ear. Once he wears me out, he cleans me up and kisses me deeply, knowing today is going to be hard. I woke up to a text from Dad that Violet is in critical condition and he needs me. She needs me.
“I feel like a total hypocrite.” I nuzzle my nose into Gabriel’s chest.
“You’re not a hypocrite. You’re human. You reacted the exact way any person would if they found out what you did.”
“I just can’t fathom it. She’s my roommate. How could she do this to me? How could he?”
Gabriel pulls my face away from his chest and cups my cheeks. “How could I do this? How could you?”
“That’s not fair,” I retort.
“Isn’t it? Aren’t we doing the same thing, little bird?” I have no response for that. Because he’s right. “Allow your father the opportunity to explain. And keep your own situation in mind. Sometimes you can’t control destiny. Someone once told me that.”
I chuckle at my words being thrown back at me. “I’m scared. What happens if she doesn’t pull through? This is all my fault. What if I had just listened? I made her leave.” My bottom lip starts to quiver at
the thought of losing Violet.
“Don’t go there. Be strong for your friend. Be strong for your father. You need each other right now.”
I stare into his eyes. “And what about us? Where do we go from here?” Can I handle the rejection if he chooses to let me go? I hold his steely gaze, waiting, searching for a sign that he wants to keep me while preparing for the worst. He leans forward, fusing his lips to mine, his gentle kiss worrying me. The last time he was this gentle, he tried to set me free.
I don’t realize I’m holding my breath until he finally pulls back, his eyes shining with devotion. “We find a way to make us work. I’m a selfish man, but we both clearly have a death wish.” I burst out into laughter as his lips twist into a playful grin. “Let’s just say you’re my little bird, and I have the perfect cage in my home with your name on it.”
I return his smile. “I’d like that.” He catches me off guard and spanks my ass, kissing me quickly.
“It’s time to go.”
“I know.” I need to head to the hospital. I can’t imagine what my dad is going through right now. Gabriel walks me to my car. Before I leave, he makes sure to reiterate his rules. Two nights a week, I’m in his bed, and always on the weekends. My heart pitter-patters with excitement as I force myself to climb into my car and drive away from him.
Still feeling high from our night, I’m relishing the possibilities of our future. But the closer I get to school, the more my anxiety takes over. I try to call my dad, but it goes to voicemail. I’m worried that when I get there, it will be too late. That I won’t be able to tell Violet how sorry I am. I’m a horrible friend, and I’m just as guilty for falling for someone I have no right to. If what she’s doing is wrong, what I’m doing is worse. I spend the remainder of the drive rehearsing my speech and praying to any higher power she pulls through this.
Sweet Little Lies Page 10