Crisis of Faith by Benjamin Medrano (z-lib.org)

by Unknown

  “Maybe so, but let’s look at this a different way,” Kevin said, deciding to abandon subtlety. “We, and I do mean we in this case, have three choices. We can stay here and die when Slaid Damrung manages to hunt us down, we can flee the nation with what wealth we can carry with us, or we can give this a shot, inflict some pain and agony on our enemies, and get a solid start as nobility in another country. Which do you want?”

  For a long moment the room was quiet, and Ruthan crossed his arms, glaring at Kevin wordlessly. Bran sighed, gripping the edge of the table tight, and Kevin stood there, looking back at the two of them fearlessly.

  “That does put it into perspective, doesn’t it?” Bran said softly. He seemed to consider, then continued. “In that case, I don’t think I can just make the decision for everyone else. I want to present the options to them and see what they want to do. If we’re going to do this, I only want those who want to do it involved.”

  “I entirely understand. If we do it, I’m not dragging any of my people with who aren’t willing, either,” Kevin agreed, nodding and keeping an eye on Ruthan as he added, “If you want to gather your people and make a decision, I’ll wait. That said, I’m not sure how much time we have to act. Winter’s coming, after all.”

  “True enough. Ruthan, would you go get the others?” Bran asked, and the other man nodded.

  “Right away, sir,” the man said, giving Kevin a distrustful look as he headed toward the back door.

  Kevin ignored the look, instead finding a spot where he could lean against the wall. He was sure that the discussion would be interesting, especially after the arguments that’d ensued when he’d gotten word.

  In the end, he’d decided that the risk was worth it, even if he wasn’t happy about it. What he wouldn’t give to plant a dagger in Slaid Damrung’s other eye.

  Chapter 18

  Diamond paused as she came around the corner, a book in hand, and nearly ran into Nadis. The archpriestess stiffened slightly as well, pausing as she’d been speaking to Nora. It was a bit interesting seeing the pale-skinned elf alongside Nadis, as Nora looked younger than Nadis, yet had been born millennia before.

  “Ah, hello, Lady Diamond! It’s good to see you again,” Nora said in her strangely accented manner, not seeming to notice Nadis’s reaction. “How are your studies coming?”

  “Studies?” Nadis asked, blinking a couple of times as she looked at Diamond in surprise. “Is that why you’re here?”

  “Yes, as a matter of fact,” Diamond replied, relaxing ever so slightly as she smiled at Nora. “The changes to my magic, along with the links to the other Jewels, necessitated some additional experiments when it came to my magic, and when the academy was recovered… well, Kassandra thought that we were wasting our potential. Besides, it’d been so long since I made significant advances in spellcasting that this is… restful, I suppose. As for my studies, I think they’re going well, Nora.”

  “Good! I was just explaining a few things to Nadis, since she came across a few interesting references in a holy text,” Nora said, looking between them as she added, “I didn’t realize you two knew each other.”

  “Ah, she was the archpriestess of Medaea before me, prior to being captured,” Nadis explained, her voice a touch wary as she looked at Diamond, considering before she continued. “It seems there were a number of rituals that were never mentioned in our records, only in her holy text. Worse, many of the methods to perform the rituals weren’t detailed. Apparently they were considered common knowledge before the Godsrage.”

  “Oh. Oh, one of those,” Diamond said, wincing a little as she shook her head. “Yes, we’ve run into a few of those ourselves, I’m afraid. Did she show you one of the new copies of Marin’s Codex? Volume… four, was it, that dealt with rituals?”

  “Five, actually, and no, I’m afraid that Cortin is currently using the volume, and we don’t have another copy yet,” Nora said, grimacing as she added, “The last attempt at copying it didn’t go well. Sistina was displeased enough by the mistakes she burned it.”

  Diamond flinched at that, inhaling sharply as she asked, “Did she say why, at least?”

  “Only that ‘details matter’, as she watched it burn,” Nora said, sighing softly, and Nadis looked between them in confusion.

  “Um, may I ask what you’re talking about? I do remember Marin’s Codex was considered a definitive resource on magic, but I don’t know much more since Yisara has never owned a copy,” Nadis replied slowly, frowning a little.

  “Marin’s Codex isn’t a single volume, it’s nine, as a matter of fact. Also, calling it the definitive resource on magic would be giving it a bit too much credit. It was the foundation of a great deal of research, yes, but not definitive. Other magi made advances over what it contained,” Nora explained patiently. “That said, it’s an amazing work for building a proper foundation. Better yet, Sistina translated it accurately into modern elvish, which removes an enormous barrier for those who wish to use ancient magic.”

  “As to why she’s so upset at inaccurate translations, Sistina is… personally invested in the content of the books,” Diamond said delicately, clearing her throat as she added, “Apparently, before she died originally, she was Marin. She wrote the books, became an angel, was kidnapped and turned into a demon, then ended up being turned into a tree by happenstance. Her memories are fragmented, but some of her original nature persists even now.”

  Nadis opened her mouth, then shut it again, blinking at Diamond, then asked incredulously, “An angel, really?”

  “Yes. From what was said, she was an angel of Balvess, a god of magic who died in the Godsrage. Unfortunately, Irethiel’s predecessor decided that she’d make an excellent subordinate and stole her,” Diamond said wryly. “That’s why she knew so much about the brands to begin with. She’d had one, once upon a time.”

  “I… see. I wasn’t aware of that,” Nadis said, looking like she was digesting the information, and not entirely sure how she should react. After a moment she murmured, “I do wonder why you kept it quiet, though… it seems like important information.”

  “Queen Calath and Beryl were both informed, as were their agents. If you weren’t told, either it was an oversight or, more likely, they didn’t think it was important,” Diamond said, shrugging calmly.

  “Ah, well, it certainly clears up a few questions that I’d had in the back of my mind. I do find it a little disturbing that Sistina was a demon, but…” Nadis’s voice trailed off and she shook her head. “No, that doesn’t really matter. I’m just surprised, I suppose.”

  “I can’t say as I blame you,” Diamond said, thinking back and smiling. “I probably wouldn’t have reacted well when I heard about it if it hadn’t been for Sistina rescuing us from Jared. That was… well, many tears of relief were shed at the time, I can tell you that much.”

  “Um, would the two of you like some privacy?” Nora interjected, looking at Diamond. “It feels like this is something private.”

  Diamond looked at Nadis and quirked an eyebrow, though suddenly she found herself hopeful. This was the first time they hadn’t met in a formal manner, and she realized they hadn’t really had a chance to talk about what had happened. It was up to Nadis, though, and Diamond didn’t want to push, not after things had been going reasonably well during the meetings.

  “I… think I’d like that. Thank you for your time, Nora. It’s been a fascinating experience talking to you,” Nadis said, nodding graciously to the woman, who smiled happily in return.

  “It isn’t a problem at all! I’ll be over there when you’re done,” Nora replied, gesturing at a nook with numerous brightly colored tomes on a table, as well as a frustrated-looking human man studying a book. “It looks like Anthony needs some help, anyway.”

  Diamond and Nadis watched her go, then Diamond gestured at a nearby table. “How about there? I’m not sure there’s many other places in the city with more privacy… except maybe Sistina’s cavern, but the trip there is punishi
ng.”

  “How so?” Nadis asked, stepping over to the table in a wordless agreement to Diamond’s suggestion, and she followed, taking a seat across from Nadis, setting her books on the table gently.

  “It’s at the center of the mountain, down at about the same level as the base. So your choices are to trek through dozens of levels of the dungeon, as Sistina doesn’t believe in giving shortcuts to her heart, or taking a stairwell from the palace,” Diamond said, shaking her head. “It’s… a painful climb. If my body hadn’t been strengthened by my time here, I probably couldn’t manage it.”

  “Ah, yes… that would be problematic, wouldn’t it? I was a touch incredulous about the difficulty of the climb to the palace, so that would likely be far, far worse,” Nadis murmured, pausing for a moment before asking, “Why have you retained the name they forced on you? I was told that the mind control was undone.”

  “It was. I’m no longer forced to forget that my name was Visna, or that Ruby was Antessa. However…” Diamond paused, then sighed softly, looking down at her hands as she explained. “My memories were altered, Nadis. I don’t remember being called Visna in any of the memories of my childhood, growing up, or even on my ascent to becoming the archpriestess. As far as I’m concerned, everyone called me Diamond for all that time. I know that isn’t true, but it doesn’t change what my memory claims.”

  “O-oh,” Nadis said, blinking a few times, and obviously debating on what to say, but after a moment Diamond smiled slightly.

  “That said, truthfully I rather like the name. Diamond is… pretty. It suits me,” Diamond said, reaching up to stroke a glittering strand of her hair. “Besides, I love the way that Sistina and Phynis smile when they say it.”

  “Love… well, of course. You did marry them, after all,” Nadis said, regaining her poise as she smiled, though there was an uncomfortable edge to it. She paused, then spoke softly. “I don’t understand you, Diamond. I don’t… know how to relate to you anymore.”

  “I don’t think we ever could relate to one another,” Diamond replied calmly.

  Nadis looked up sharply at that, anger on her face for just an instant. “Why would you say that? We got along well before Kelvanis invaded!”

  “No, we didn’t,” Diamond disagreed, shaking her head gently as she spoke in the same level voice. “You and I barely interacted. We exchanged letters, and I made decisions from the depths of Our Lady’s temple. You were in the middle of Yisara, speaking with the faithful day after day. It’s easy to seem to get along from a distance like that, but we were in such different positions that I don’t think we could ever truly relate to one another.”

  Nadis’s eyes narrowed, but the archpriestess didn’t say anything immediately, instead simply staring at Diamond. Eventually she asked, “What are you getting at? I thought you wanted to talk to get along better, not to antagonize me.”

  “Antagonize you? Oh no, of course not!” Diamond said, smiling suddenly as she chuckled softly. “No, what I’m saying is that I think that me being the archpriestess and staying there was a mistake. I had no concept of what the faithful were truly dealing with. I got reports of the war with Kelvanis, but do you truly believe that I understood them? Do you think that I could honestly understand the gravity of the situation without speaking with some of the victims personally?”

  Diamond paused, looking at Nadis as the archpriestess inhaled, then exhaled, obviously considering what she’d said. At least she didn’t look angry, which was a good sign.

  “I’ve been thinking about it frequently for a long, long time. I don’t think that I should have been the archpriestess. I may have been a good spiritual leader… but I didn’t lead. I wasn’t there when people needed me the most,” Diamond continued at last, letting out her breath as she sat back. “You should have been truly in charge… but we were following traditions. Traditions that now feel uncomfortably out of place, if you ask me. The revelations about Medaea startled me.”

  “You didn’t seem startled at the time,” Nadis murmured, looking at Diamond oddly, now. Diamond wasn’t quite sure what she was thinking, but it was a good sign, she hoped.

  “That’s because I knew a little, if not the details. I’d gone to speak with Tyria the previous day, and she told me that both sides were wrong about her,” Diamond said, thinking back on the encounter and smiling, recalling her own shock in sardonic amusement. “I asked her what we were wrong about, and she told me I’d have to wait and hear at the same time as you, as she wasn’t going to show favoritism. It gave me a chance to at least brace myself, which helped when things turned out to be… well, even more shocking than I expected. I never thought that we’d been following a goddess of the dead.”

  “Ah. As for her nature, that much was a shock, even if she didn’t explain the differences fully. It was… well, fascinating to read about some of them, and they also explain some of the oldest tales of the faith,” Nadis said, visibly relaxing as she shrugged. “Still, I don’t think that calling her a goddess of the dead is exactly right, either. Ensuring those who die are honored feels a little different to me, as does her former focus on ensuring that they’re avenged when necessary. I’m not entirely comfortable with it, but I feel I can understand it.”

  “A fair point, I suppose. How are your people dealing with the discussions, anyway? I know I’ve been worried about them, and how they might react,” Diamond said, leaning forward again, relief rushing through her at Nadis’s reasonable response. “While I might not feel suited to being a member of the priesthood anymore, I find that I’m rather heavily invested in trying to prevent you and Elissa from coming to blows.”

  “As much as I may dislike her, I have to admit that seems… unlikely. She’s kept calm and reasonable even when I’ve provoked her. I haven’t done it consciously for the most part, but I have,” Nadis admitted, taking a deep breath. “The others are… reluctantly dealing with the issue, even when they aren’t happy about it. Honestly, I suspect an enormous part of the problem is how different Tyria’s appearance and name are from what we’ve been taught.”

  “Oh?” Diamond asked, blinking in surprise, not having expected that aspect of the discussion. She remembered Tyria stating she might take a new name early on, but she hadn’t anticipated her appearance being the problem.

  “The faithful have followed Medaea for decades if not centuries, you know that. The name is ingrained in their minds, and as such it’s something which the people are comfortable with. Conversely, Tyria was introduced to them initially as a goddess of slaves, something which they’ve despised with every fiber of their beings,” Nadis explained, hesitating for a moment, then continued. “As for her appearance… well, I suspect it comes back to the same issue. Our statues were all patterned off an early sculpture based on Medaea’s actual appearance, so people know it and are comfortable with it. Tyria doesn’t fit that image, and instead was made into something to suit Kelvanis. Don’t you think that the faithful would be reluctant to see a constant reminder that she was hurt by them? Controlled like that? It’s also why I’m so leery about her connection to Sistina.”

  “That makes far more sense,” Diamond said, sitting back as she began thinking, a slight frown on her face. She hesitated for a bit, debating on what to say. Finally, she let out a sigh as she looked at Nadis. “I… well, on a personal level I feel that she shouldn’t need to change if she’s comfortable as she is, but that’s partially selfish, due to what happened to me. You make some excellent points, really. The problem is… I don’t know what’s fair.

  “As for her connection to Sistina, I think that’s a much more difficult subject. You see—” Diamond began, but at that moment the doors opened and Desa stepped into the chamber, a grim look on her face as she glanced around and spotted the two of them.

  “Diamond, Archpriestess, there you are! I’m glad you’re together,” Desa exclaimed, ignoring a couple of annoyed looks thrown her way by people who were studying. “If possible, please come with me. The prisoner
s finally talked, so we have a little more information. Finally.”

  Diamond blinked in surprise, then relief rushed through her. She’d begun to wonder if they’d ever learn who Elissa’s assailants truly were, which made the news a relief. But then she looked at Nadis in concern, opening her mouth just as the other woman stood.

  “It appears that we’ll have to continue this discussion later, Diamond,” Nadis said, her voice firm, and a slight glitter in her eyes. “As useful as it is, I believe it’s best to find out who tried to frame my church now.”

  “As you like. We’re coming, Desa,” Diamond agreed, standing as well. She did hesitate, before regretfully leaving her books behind.

  She could always pick up her studies later, in the end.

  Chapter 19

  The room was rather full, which was part of why Tyria was keeping herself concealed. Elissa, her guards, the priest Ollie, a couple of the city’s guards, a golem, and the prisoner were there, along with Albert Windgale. Even more importantly, Tyria knew that Diamond and Nadis would be there any moment, which would make the room even more heavily crowded than it already was.

  The prisoner was the leader of the people who’d attacked Elissa, Tyria knew. Feldan Soarlik was a normal-looking human, with brown hair, brown eyes, and had a fair amount of stubble from his stay in the jail so far. He also had a hint of power around him that Tyria recognized, though she wasn’t going to act on her knowledge. Like she’d told Diamond before, acting in the mortal world capriciously was dangerous, and she wasn’t about to do anything that would cause the greater gods to come after her.

  Her gaze flicked to the side as the door opened to reveal a guard, followed by Nadis, another guard, Diamond, and finally Desa. Diamond and Nadis looked a little more at ease in each other’s company than they had that morning, which improved Tyria’s mood slightly, though it was minor compared to the worries currently plaguing her.