A Night of Redemption (The Redemption Saga Book 5)
Page 3
Sawyer began to play with her cellphone, pulling away from him. A moment later, she stood up and went out on the patio. He could see her on the phone now. He wondered who she could possibly be calling. He could count the people she knew well enough to call on both hands.
“I mean, they didn’t need to take his stuff,” Zander complained, looking distraught. “It’s not theirs. It belongs here. In his space. And I…”
“Zander, it’s okay. You know that it’s probably all going to go to Thompson. They’re just doing legally what they have to. It’s okay.” Jasper raised his hands, trying to calm Zander down. Elijah knew what his problem was.
“He knows we won’t steal it!” Zander pointed at the now blank spots where pictures used to hang. “Why would they take those down? This is his space…”
He wanted the condo to be just like James had left it. A psychological way to keep the person in their lives forever. Maybe he would walk through that door one day and everything would be just how he left it.
Elijah groaned, closing his eyes and leaning back on the couch. Someone turned the TV on and sat next to him. He peeked warily.
“I can’t deal with Zander right now,” Jasper mumbled.
“Yeah,” Elijah sighed in sympathy. “He’ll be okay. He doesn’t handle this level of change well.”
“Don’t I know it,” Jasper muttered with a bite Elijah hadn’t expected.
A fracture was appearing between them. They were the two oldest friends on the team, and their different ways of grieving were causing a rift.
Elijah frowned and placed a hand on Jasper’s shoulder. “I’ll talk to him later, but don’t hold this against him. He’s like the rest of us, not thinking clearly.” He knew Zander could be annoying, immature, and a downright pain in the ass, but this? This was abnormal, and caused from a pain so deep none of them could make it through alone. This wasn’t something he should be judged for. This was something they needed each other for. They couldn’t start falling apart now.
Sawyer walked back in quickly, shoving her phone in her pocket. He watched her make a straight shot for Zander, grabbing him when he was in arm’s reach.
Elijah watched the temperamental redhead fall apart the moment her arms were around him. “This is his space,” Zander cried softly.
“Was, Zander. He’s gone, baby. He doesn’t care anymore about the pictures on the wall. It’s okay.” She said it quickly, just holding him. Elijah felt tears flood from the back of his eyes, that pressure he knew they were all trying to push back constantly. “It’s okay. Just breathe. Zander, just breathe for me.”
And he did. Elijah could hear Zander’s gut-wrenching attempts to do that. Breathe. Every single one became a sob.
Zander had a lot of problems, but there was one thing they all knew and even respected about him. He felt deeply. He felt fully and without reservation. It led to recklessness and rash behavior, but the man was honest about everything going on with his heart and it was admirable.
“That’s it,” she murmured. “It’s going to be okay. We’re all here with you. I’m here with you. He’s not hurting. He’s not in pain. He doesn’t care about the pictures anymore. You don’t need to worry about that. It’s okay.”
None of them could do anything except watch the scene unfold. Sombra belly-crawled slowly closer to her Magi and the man. Finally, she bumped her head to Zander’s leg. Zander pulled away and looked down, giving a very weak and shaky smile. His eyes were red and tear-swollen.
And for a moment, things looked better. He scratched the big cat on the top of her head, kneeling down for her to rub her head against his chest.
“The animals are good at comfort without being annoyingly human,” Quinn commented, walking in with his wolves trailing him. The wolves joined Sombra and eventually, the three of them knocked Zander over, who gave up. He just let the animals lick his face and try to rub on him. Elijah chuckled at the scene, his heart feeling lighter again.
Quinn moved to sit on his other side while Sawyer disappeared. It was at that moment when he realized Vincent was no longer in the room. He had no idea where their leader had wandered off to.
“Is she looking for Vin?” Elijah asked his closest friend.
“He’s sitting in James’ office,” the feral Magi told him.
They all settled down, aimlessly watching the TV. Zander got up, the animals following him, and reclined in front of the couch, his head between Elijah and Jasper’s thighs. The pack of animals sprawled out around him, almost making a conscious effort to keep touching the redhead. Silent comfort. “Sorry about that,” he mumbled.
“You’re fine, Zander.” Elijah ruffled his hair, making him jerk away. He laughed louder at that response. After messing with Zander a little more and the laughter died, he went back to watching the television.
There were shots of the funeral. They had all known it wasn’t a closed affair. The timing of James’ death, and the reason, had made it a WMC state affair. He’d been a hero, truly. The world had been watching. People talked about what was said. Clips of Thompson and Vincent flashed before them. Excerpts of what was said.
Someone even commented about how Sawyer was a pallbearer while he wheeled behind the group, out of place in a way, but part of the group anyway. He’d wanted to do it himself, but he felt Sawyer was the only replacement he could accept. He was glad someone he loved stood in for him.
And she deserved it, too.
There she was, in the front with Jasper as the two shortest members. Marching to the slow beat of the music. A commenter made the astute statement that if anyone knew how much James believed in second, and even third, chances, it was her.
She belonged there.
Elijah couldn’t think of a better replacement for himself.
“VINCENT, STOP!”
Speaking of his replacement. Sawyer’s roared order echoed in the living room. Jasper quickly turned off the television and jumped up. Elijah and Quinn were the next up and moving. Zander untangled himself from the animals, following behind them.
Elijah heard more as he entered the back hallway.
“I’m not stopping until he’s dead. Don’t try to make me.” Vincent sounded pained, like a wounded animal.
“We fucking talked about this. We have other things to get done first. You can’t-” Sawyer was angry. He considered that. No, not angry, just frustrated. Tired.
“I WANT HIM DEAD!” Vincent roared. Things clattered in the room, like they were shoved off something, probably the desk. “HE DESERVES IT! I’M NOT GOING TO REST UNTIL HE IS!”
Elijah slammed to a stop, grabbing who he could to stop them. Quinn and Zander. He had his hands on Quinn and Zander. He watched Jasper stop, paralyzed, in front of the office door.
This was about Axel, which meant it wasn’t their place.
Elijah would follow orders. He would work his hardest to help Sawyer in her task. But it wasn’t his place to get between those two when it came to that man. It wasn’t any of their places. This was a wound between them.
The silence was deafening. He wondered what Sawyer could be thinking, what could be racing through her mind. Surely she felt the same. He figured she was more than ready to drive a blade into the man’s chest.
But he also knew she wanted them to be better, to be more ready. To rest and heal and grieve. He knew that she was patient and would want them hunting at their best. They weren’t close to that.
“And I’ll do that for you,” she said evenly, finally breaking the sick silence. Elijah’s gut churned. Emotions were too high, and yet she said that so evenly. “For you. For me. Fuck, for the WMC. For Henry and James, absolutely I’ll do that. But you need to do this for me. You need to stop for right now. You need to step back. Just for a moment.”
He couldn’t miss how her voice broke right there at the end.
“Sawyer…”
“No, Vincent.” She shut him down swiftly. “You need to rest. You haven’t in days. You can’t tell me it’s helpi
ng, either. You’ve lost weight and look like hell. You can’t do this to yourself.”
“Why not?” he demanded angrily. Angry enough that Elijah winced.
“Because he doesn’t deserve it.”
“He doesn’t deserve this?” Vincent’s voice was rising again, back into an angry yell.
“He doesn’t deserve you. He doesn’t deserve knowing he put you in this place. He doesn’t deserve the victory of it, knowing he’s made you destroy yourself without needing to even lift a finger in the effort.”
Elijah slumped against a wall. Zander joined him, wide-eyed, and Jasper backed away from the door slowly. He wasn’t sure why any of them had jumped up, hearing Sawyer yell like that. The idea that she needed them to help with their leader? Either way, it had given them front row seats to Vincent imploding and Sawyer trying to hold him together. Elijah had already tried more than once to get the man to sleep. They all had, but none of them touched the Axel subject.
Sawyer jumped into it with both feet.
Then she stormed out of the office, nearly running into Jasper.
“Fuck!” she snapped, startling. “Shit. Sorry, guys. Let’s go watch a movie. I’ll come back here to check on him if I need to.”
“I can,” Elijah offered.
“No. I will.” She sounded certain and looked unmovable on the topic. “It’s for me to do.”
They shuffled back into the living room, and she chose some really bad comedy that did get them laughing. Weakly, but laughing.
Halfway through the movie, Vincent walked out, looking broken and lost. She just waved a hand and he sank in front of her, his head between her legs as he sat on the floor. He watched the movie with the rest of them. He didn’t laugh, but Elijah was just glad to see him there.
Their Italian fell asleep in less than ten minutes. Sawyer played with his hair with one hand, and held Quinn’s hand with her spare one. Elijah stretched an arm over Quinn’s shoulders and played with her hair. Zander and Jasper enclosed Vincent on the floor, leaning on the outside of her thighs. Animals sprawled all over the room. Elijah glanced at the glass door to the patio. Kaar sat on the rail, looking inside, his head tilted to the side. It was as if he’d come back just to watch Vincent sleep.
And they all watched the dumbest movie they had probably ever seen. It wasn’t any good, but for the first time since James died, they all sat in the same room and spent the moment together.
Elijah closed his eyes and leaned on Quinn more. Tomorrow they had more work to do. Today, he could just enjoy this and pretend like nothing was wrong.
3
Sawyer
Sawyer put herself in charge the next day, making sure the guys all woke up and got showered and bathed for the meeting. She cooked breakfast, Jasper jumping in to help her when he realized.
For a weird moment, life felt so normal, even though they weren’t home and everything was wrong. They were never going home. That was something she hated, and now it was time to start worrying about it.
“After the meeting,” she mumbled. Everything was steps.
“What?” Jasper frowned as he flipped bacon.
“I was thinking about everything we need to do. New place, getting the animals adjusted. Our stuff back home. We can’t stay in this condo forever.” She snapped her fingers, remembering something else. “I promised Vincent yesterday that me, you, and Zander would jump on the Dark Web and dig around for Axel stuff. If either of you know how, we can set up alerts on certain sites if he’s mentioned or anything. Could give us a lead on something, and it’s something Vincent doesn’t have to think about.”
“Yeah, we have a lot to do. We can set that up after this meeting. Thompson wants to talk to us today about the living situation too.”
“Yeah, I know.” She sighed. It was time to get them all out of James’ space. Zander’s outburst made that apparent the day before. They were already rattled by the funeral. She’d thought she’d gotten Vincent to a good place, but he’d broken the moment they walked back into the condo. The space had driven him back over the edge again and she had to fight with him to get back into the world around him.
She was thankful the guys hadn’t stormed in for that argument. It was for her to deal with. Axel was a subject only she could safely push Vincent’s buttons with. He wouldn’t listen to anyone else.
And Zander? She was the best one to say what needed to be said. She wasn’t going to leave it up to one of the other guys, not while they hurt so much.
She felt the weight on her chest. It had started before the funeral and it seemed to be growing. She would carry them. She could do that. She was strong enough. She would jump between them when they needed it, making sure each was okay. They deserved that from her, for giving her all the hope and joy and love they had offered her in the short six months they’d had together.
As she thought about that, the rest of the team wandered in. Zander walked to her and kissed her cheek, with a groggy good morning. Elijah and Vincent just fell into their spots. Quinn checked the fridge for their animals’ breakfasts and she smiled.
“I got it,” she told him, picking up two of the three full bowls on the counter. Huge servings of raw beef, unseasoned. A meal that would get them through the day, in case things got too busy to feed them dinner. “I think we should take them today.”
“Me too. I wish they could have gone yesterday, but…”
“Funerals aren’t a good place for animals,” she agreed. It had been hard, leaving her girl in the condo again, but it had been necessary.
“We’ll get them out and moving around today.” He smiled at her, taking the bowls. She grabbed the last one, Sombra’s, and put it down by itself in the kitchen. The wolves were fed in the dining area with everyone else, but Sombra was food possessive.
Breakfast was quiet and finished quickly. Then everyone came alive, finished getting dressed, and they loaded up.
She hated that the day felt nearly normal.
She wanted to go home. This wasn’t supposed to be normal. Normal was their remodeled plantation house. Normal was an early morning run through the woods with wolves on their heels. Normal was the gym and the garage.
New York, James’ condo, and the IMPO headquarters weren’t supposed to be normal.
“Where’s this meeting?” Zander asked.
“In Thompson’s office. He and I agreed doing it at the firm wasn’t going to work. We’d rather be in a place we all know,” Vincent answered patiently. She eyed him. He looked healthier already. The night of sleep had done him good and she knew he’d slept through the night. She’d fallen asleep right next to him in bed to make sure.
She tried not to think about how he moved away from her the moment he realized they were cuddling. She had slid in to give him a more pleasant wake up. She hadn’t been thinking sexually, just easy. Soft. Careful.
And he’d jumped away from her like she was on fire.
She sublimated to get out of the SUV before it stopped, reforming to breathe in the crisp winter air. It wasn’t normal either. It used to be, but she missed the clean air of Georgia. There had been no touch of city smog at their plantation home.
“Y’all have a good meeting,” she told them as they unloaded. Vincent glared at her, probably for her stunt to get out of the vehicle.
“And where will you be?” he asked sharply.
“Getting stuff done for you,” she answered. Things she could do without him. She’d texted and talked to Thompson about it the night before. He’d checked the will. She wasn’t addressed in it and there were things she could start for the team that they didn’t need to worry about. Not yet, anyway.
They just had to make it through this meeting on their own.
“That doesn’t answer the question,” he retorted. The entire group was just waiting for the Vincent and Sawyer stand off to end.
“I don’t answer to you.” She crossed her arms. “I’ll be safe and you can know all about it afterwards. When you are done with this.
This is more important to all of you right now and it’s going to stay that way.”
“Of course you don’t answer to me,” he mumbled, looking away.
She reached out and poked his chest. “Don’t be an ass. Let me do this, Vincent. You go with the guys and get through this, and I’ll be waiting on the other side. I’m not going anywhere or doing anything dangerous.”
He met her eyes again and nodded slowly. She moved to touch his face and he stepped away, walking swiftly away from the group. She hadn’t been able to say the words on the tip of her tongue. She had wanted to tell him that she loved him.
She watched his back with wide eyes. While she wasn’t paying attention, someone touched her back.
“Give him time. He’s not in a good place,” Quinn whispered to her.
“I know.” She knew better than most. She collected her feelings and put them all away except one. She smiled to the rest of her men. “Love you guys. You can do this. I’ll see you later.”
Quinn smiled kindly at her, kissing her cheek. Then he followed Vincent. Elijah followed suit, then Zander and Jasper.
She waited for them all to enter the building, then pulled a set of keys from her pocket. She turned them over in her hand. They would be mad at her for this, but this was for her to do. She hadn’t lied to them, though. It wasn’t dangerous.
She went to James’ car, left there since the morning after he died. It was being turned over to Thompson and he already had custody of it. He was letting her drive it for the day. He’d had someone drop the keys off at the condo building and she picked them up before she woke up any of the guys.
The drive was quiet, with Sombra sitting in the passenger’s seat, just watching the world pass by, not giving Sawyer anything about how the big cat felt. She kept the radio off, her thoughts focused on her task. She had interviews to get through. When she parked at the prison, she knew the first one was already prepared.
“I’m here for Missy,” she told the guard at the reception desk. “The doppelganger.”
“Of course, Miss…”