Ben Archer

by Rae Knightly

  “Of course,” Bob clapped his hands together, smiling. “Follow me.” He led the way into a stylish living room with black sofas and a glass coffee table.

  Ben spotted several elegantly dressed people on the balcony which was decorated with white, Christmas-styled lights and candles, while upbeat jazz music played at a decent volume–enough to lighten conversation without drowning it.

  A young woman wearing a tight, one-piece dress entered the apartment with a glass of wine in her hand. With the other, she removed her high-heeled sandals and thrust them aside, then smiled when she spotted them. “Hey, Bobby! There you are!” she called, pattering lightly over to them. “Who are your friends?”

  “Hi, Pearl,” Bob said. “This is Laura Archer. And this is her son, Ben. He’s my nephew.”

  Pearl squealed. “Your nephew? You never told me you had a nephew. Look at him! He’s your spitting image. But much more handsome.” She squeezed Ben’s cheek.

  Ben prayed the dimly lit apartment hid his crimson face.

  “This is Pearl,” Bob said, seeming a bit jumpy. “She works for me.”

  Pearl waved a manicured hand at him. “Yeah, right. I clean up after you, honey.” She rolled her eyes at Laura. “He has such a scattered brain, this one. You’d think he’d be capable of organizing a simple social event, but guess who did all this.” She waved a hand at the decorated balcony.

  Bob wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Yes, all right. I couldn’t do it without you, baby. You know that.”

  She smiled approvingly, then waved her wine glass at Laura, “So, is it just you two, then?”

  “…and Mesmo,” Ben blurted.

  Laura tensed sharply beside him.

  Bob frowned. “Mesmo? What’s a Mesmo?” Then his eyes widened. “Hold on a minute! No cats in my house. I hate cats. I’m allergic.”

  Picturing Mesmo as a cat, Ben snorted before he could stop himself.

  Laura coughed into her hand. “Hum. Mesmo is a friend. And no, he won’t be staying. It’s just the two of us.”

  “I see,” Bob said, raising an eyebrow. Then, addressing Pearl, he explained, “Laura and Ben arrived from the West Coast earlier. They’ll be staying with me for a while.”

  Pearl’s face brightened. “How lovely! I’ll finally have a decent girlfriend to talk to.” She winked at Laura, then turned to Ben. “And you? Have you ever been to Toronto before?”

  “Erm…n-no.”

  “Really?” she exclaimed. “You’ll love it here! There’s so much to do. Have you seen the CN Tower?” She took his hand and skipped lightly to the window with him in tow. “Look! You can see it from here.”

  Ben swallowed and glanced back at his mother who directed a small smile at him.

  ***

  Laura woke with a start. She stared at the darkness, trying to remember where she was. She had only meant to lie down for a couple of minutes, but instead, had fallen fast asleep, fully dressed, in the bedroom Bob had provided for her and Ben.

  A light tapping on the door made her jump. She realized it was the sound that must have woken her. She rolled over and found Ben sleeping beside her, also fully dressed. He hadn’t even taken off his boots.

  She stood and quietly opened the door a crack.

  “Hi,” Pearl whispered. “I didn’t want to wake Ben.”

  Laura nodded, blinking the sleep from her eyes.

  “Hum, I didn’t want to wake you, either, but we ordered sushi and Bobby said you might be hungry. Do you want to join us?”

  Laura turned to check that Ben was still sleeping, trying to figure out what to do.

  “I made Ben a sandwich, earlier,” the young woman said as if reading Laura’s mind.

  “Thanks,” she replied gratefully, not used to having someone take care of things for her. She felt tired, but she was starving, too. Should she step out in her muddy clothes? The idea of mingling with a crowd of well-dressed, casual people was daunting.

  “Um,” Pearl interrupted her thoughts. “Bobby said you didn’t bring any luggage. I thought maybe you’d be more comfortable in this.” She held up a black dress.

  Now, where did she get that from? Laura wondered.

  “Bobby entertains every weekend. I always keep a spare dress around,” Pearl said, seeming to read her every thought.

  Laura accepted it, studying the young woman curiously. “Are you and Bob…” she began.

  “…together?” Pearl finished. She rolled her eyes. “Oh, God, no! We’d get into each other’s hair all the time. He’s so unpredictable. It drives me crazy.”

  She’s trying too hard, Laura realized.

  Pearl locked eyes with her. “What about you? I guess you and Bobby have quite a history?”

  Laura dropped her eyes. “Yes. But that was a long time ago…” She let the phrase hang. Then she smiled at Pearl. “Thanks for the dress. We won’t be staying here long–a couple of days at the most. I’ll make sure to return it to you before we leave.”

  Did a wave of relief pass briefly before the woman’s eyes?

  Pearl grinned, “Well, go on then. Try it on. We’ll be waiting for you.” She waved as she turned to leave.

  Laura closed the door and let out a long, shaky breath. Her heart pounded in her chest. Had this been a bad idea? Something in the back of her mind told her it was, but she had no choice. Ben worried her more than she cared to admit. The events that had taken place on the Kananaskis Mountains were excruciatingly fresh in her mind. She needed a place where she could watch over him and make sure he hadn’t come out with permanent injuries–physical or mental.

  “That goes for me, too,” she thought sarcastically, heading for the attached bathroom.

  The hot water from the shower triggered a flow of emotions, and she found herself sobbing as she let go of the stress of the past days. She cried for Ben, she cried for Tike, and she cried for Mesmo, who hadn’t given a sign of life since their escape from the mountain. She wished she could go back in time and do things differently.

  By the time she stepped out of the bedroom wearing the cocktail dress, she had resolved that, from now on, she would do whatever necessary to let things end well.

  “Ooh, look at you!” Pearl quipped when Laura stepped onto the balcony. She took Laura’s hands and extended her arms so she could see the dress better. “It suits you perfectly.” She placed her arm through Laura’s own and directed her into the crowd. “Come on, I’ll present you.”

  CHAPTER TWO

  An Honest Conversation

  Laura sagged into the living room couch as soon as the last guests entered the elevator. She had put on a false smile and made polite conversation well into the night, thankful that her years working as a server in bars and restaurants had taught her the appropriate social manners to survive through the evening.

  “Bye, honey,” Pearl said as she kissed Bob on the cheek. The young woman waved at Laura, who returned the gesture. Then the elevator swallowed her up, and Laura was left alone with Bob Manfield.

  He removed his dark jacket, threw it to a chair, then sagged into the couch opposite her with a plastic water bottle in his hand. He crossed his ankle over his knee and rested his arm on the back of the couch in a relaxed stance. “So,” he said after drinking a sip of water. “Here we are.”

  Laura noticed an unruly mesh of hair sticking out from the back of the man’s head, and felt a pang of recognition. She cleared her throat and gestured to the apartment. “Is this yours?” she asked, her mind still in a polite-conversation mode.

  Bob nodded with a gleam in his eye. “Yup. It’s all mine. I bought it a year ago. I still have unpacked boxes in storage, though. It’s been too busy, what with my business expanding and everything…”

  Laura wasn’t really listening. Facing Bob in flesh and bone after so many years destabilized her. Sure, his brown beard and nice outfit were new, but for the rest, he hadn’t changed a bit, which didn’t help the pile of unresolved emotions she felt for him.

  She real
ized he had stopped talking and was staring at her, so she said hastily, “You’ve done well for yourself. I’m happy for you.”

  “Are you, really?” he replied with a touch of scorn.

  I don’t need this right now, Laura thought. Out loud, she said, “Yes, I am. Really.”

  She rested her elbows on her knees and rubbed her arms. “I’m sorry I called you out of the blue like that. I didn’t mean to crash in on you, but things didn’t work out the way I had planned.”

  Bob placed the bottle of water on the table and shrugged. “It’s ok,” he said. “I already knew you were coming.”

  Laura stiffened. “You did?” Her voice rose in alarm.

  He waved a hand at her. “Calm down, baby. There’s nothing to worry about.” He locked eyes with her. “Your dad warned me you’d come.”

  “My dad?”

  Bob grinned. “Yeah, I know, right? I’m sure I pulled the same face as you right now.” He leant back on the couch and crossed his knees again.

  “He came here about six months ago. He was waiting for me in the lobby.” Bob chuckled. “I thought he’d come to give me a good beating, I’ll tell you! But no, it turns out your old man wanted to have a chat, face-to-face. I invited him up, and he sat right where you are now. He told me, basically, that you and Ben were going to need help and that I wasn’t to ask any questions but that I was to give you any assistance you needed. And boy, did he make it clear that I was to accept.” Bob laughed out loud.

  Laura burst into tears. She pressed her hands to her face hurriedly. This was the last person she wanted to show weakness to, but the mention of her dad hit her hard. It was as if Bob had pointed out that her dad was sitting right next to her and she hadn’t even noticed.

  Bob fell silent for a second, then said, “Hey, baby! What’s the matter? I didn’t mean to…” he broke off, his voice thick.

  When she finally felt calm enough to peek through her fingers, he was holding a box of Kleenex in front of her. She plucked a couple of tissues and blew her nose. “I’m not your baby,” she said gruffly, trying to recover some dignity.

  Bob plopped on the couch with his arms resting on his knees, the box of Kleenex hanging loosely in his hands. “Right. Sure, bab…er…” He sighed and shook his head, then said. “How is the old man, anyway?”

  Laura pressed the tissues to her face and hiccupped. “He passed away, not long ago,” she managed. “Heart attack.”

  Bob gasped. “Oh, baby, I’m sorry,” he exclaimed. He seemed genuinely crestfallen. “I don’t believe it! The old oak, gone? Jeez’! No wonder you’re so upset.” He pushed the tissues over the table to her side.

  They both stared at it for a long moment.

  “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked gently.

  Laura shook her head. “No.” She spoke in a final tone, then straightened. “We won’t be staying long, Bob. We just needed a place to land on our feet, then we’ll be off again.”

  “Now wait a minute. I agreed to take you in. And on your own terms at that. But now that you’re here–and that Ben is here–you can’t go disappearing on me. We have an opportunity here...”

  “Stop it, Bob!” Laura snapped. “You promised over the phone you wouldn’t go there.”

  “No, you listen here, little lady.” He pointed his index finger at her. “Come now, Uncle Bob? Are you serious?” He snorted. “Ben looks like a smart kid. How long before he realizes Robert and Bob are not brothers, but one and the same? Jeez’, baby, everybody knows Bob is a diminutive for Robert.” He slapped his leg. “Uncle Bob! How did you come up with such a stupid thing?”

  Laura glanced in the direction of the room where Ben was sleeping. “Sh! Ok, ok,” she whispered through gritted teeth. “It was a dumb idea. I was desperate. But Ben can’t handle the truth right now, Bob. Please, trust me! You promised you’d go along with it.”

  Bob stared at her in obvious irritation, then said with determination, “I want Ben to know I’m his dad.”

  Laura bit her lip hard. Her mind scrambled for a reply, but she felt so drained. She couldn’t handle another drama.

  Bob glared at her, and when she didn’t answer, he said, “What? Am I not worthy? Is that what you’re thinking?”

  Please, not now!

  Bob fidgeted in apparent anger. “Come on, say it, then! It’s not that hard!”

  Laura’s exhaustion turned to anger. Didn’t he understand that this wasn’t the right time, nor the right place? Emotions bubbled inside and threatened to explode.

  He leant forward and stared at her with hard eyes. “Say it!”

  “You promised you’d watch over Ben!” she burst. “You said you’d only be gone for five minutes, but you were out for five hours, drinking with your buddies. What kind of a dad gets into a car without a driver’s license, crashes into another car, then runs off in a panic?”

  Bob didn’t move an inch. He waited to make sure she was done, then said in a low voice, “Now that wasn’t so hard, was it?”

  They glared at each other.

  A candle died out, leaving a smell of burnt wax.

  “Look,” Bob said. “I can tell you haven’t read a single letter I sent you these past eleven years…”

  “Thirteen,” she corrected.

  Bob raised his eyes. “All right, twelve, thirteen, whatever. The point is, if you’d read any of them, you’d know how often I repeated those very phrases to myself, day in, day out, night after night, going over what I’d done, wishing I’d reacted differently, hating myself every single minute for my stupid reaction.”

  “But you turned a deaf ear on me. You visited me only once in my five-year jail term, and it was to tell me you gave Ben your dad’s surname instead of mine, that you told Ben I’d died in the crash and never to contact you again.” His pale face trembled with rage. “And I felt so bad I fell for it and agreed.”

  He intertwined his fingers, their knuckles going white. “And then, it came to me one day. I was wasting my life away–waiting, hoping, praying–for you to forgive me. But I realized, the only one who could forgive me was me. If I were ever to move forward, I would need to make my own peace, stop looking back and live my life. I figured, no-one was badly hurt in the crash. I paid my dues. So I forgave myself, respected your wish and moved on.”

  He waved his arms at the apartment. “You could have been part of it, you know? But you chose not to. And I wonder, sometimes, when are you going to get over it, Laura?”

  His eyes dug into hers, forcing her to look down.

  In her haste to find a safe place to hide, Laura had conveniently discarded the thought that this conversation would take place. How wrong she’d been! Had she really thought Bob would let them stay with him without attempting to resolve their decades-old fight?

  If it hadn’t been for Ryan Archer’s contact list, Laura realized she would never have ended up here. Dad, why did you leave me Bob’s number?

  But it was too late now. The day she had always dreaded loomed before her.

  Ben is going to hate me.

  Bob’s stance softened a little. “If you think I no longer care about what I did, you’re sorely mistaken. I still think about that crash every day. I was irresponsible and young, I know that. But I’m a grown man now, I’ve learned from my mistakes. I would never turn my back on you or Ben like that again. You’ve got to believe me.”

  Laura studied his face and saw honesty reflected in it. She had shut him away from her life the minute she had learned he had been responsible for the crash, disgusted by his narrow-minded escape after his botched hit-and-run.

  We were so young!

  They had met in high school. They had been carefree. And then Ben had come along…

  She stood and brushed at the folds in her dress. “I don’t know if I can ever forgive you, Bob, but that’s my problem, not Ben’s. It would be selfish of me to continue keeping him from his dad.” She took a deep breath. “So, I agree. We’ll tell him, together. But please, Bob, give me a
week, two at the most. There’s something I need to take care of, first.”

  I have to save Mesmo.

  ***

  Ben woke, feeling rested for the first time in a long while. He had had a deep, dreamless slumber, no Tike or Bordock to torment him. He stretched, then realized his mother lay fast asleep next to him. He got out of bed as silently as possible, then took a long, refreshing shower. After days spent on the freezing Kananaskis Mountains and travelling day and night across the country, the hot water felt glorious.

  Having to wear his same clothes satisfied him much less, however, but, with no other option, he stepped into Bob’s living room with his torn jeans and dirty hooded sweater.

  He blinked at the bright light coming in from the windows and ruffled his wet hair, before realizing Bob was sitting on a stool at the edge of the kitchen counter, working on his computer while sipping on a cup of coffee.

  “’Morning, squirt.” Bob said, turning to face him. “Did you sleep well?”

  Ben noticed his uncle’s hair was as disheveled as his own, which was a bit of a relief. He smiled and replied, “Hi, Uncle Bob. Yes, thanks.”

  “I think your mom’s going to be knocked out for a good while yet. She went to bed pretty late. We had a lot of catching up to do.”

  Ben felt a pang of envy at having been left out of the conversation. He would have liked to learn everything he could about his newly-discovered uncle.

  “You must be hungry,” Bob said, getting off the high stool and opening the fridge. “Ah, you’ll have to forgive my manners. This is a typical bachelor’s fridge. Not even an old piece of cheese in sight.” He straightened and pursed his lips. “How about we get a decent plate of eggs and bacon? I know just the right place!”

  Ben wanted to hug the man. “Yes, thanks.”

  “Okey-dokey. Get cleaned up, and we’ll head right out.”

  Ben’s face drooped.

  Do I look that messy?

  Bob put his hands to his hips. “You don’t have anything else to wear, do you?” he said with half a frown.