Mistress Nell: A Merry Tale of a Merry Time

by George Cochrane Hazelton

  CHAPTER XVI

  _Ods-pitikins, my own reflection!_

  Upon the fine face of the King, as he entered Nell's drawing-room, wasan expression of nervous bantering, not wholly unmixed with anxiety.

  The slanderous Adair and his almost miraculous escape had not longweighed upon his Majesty's careless nature.

  As he had not met Adair until that night or even heard of him, his hearthad told him that the Irish roisterer could scarcely be a seriousobstacle in the way of Nell's perfect faith, if, indeed, he had met Nellat all, which he doubted. His command to the guard to follow andovertake the youth had been more the command of the ruler than of theman. Despite himself, there had been something about the dainty peacockhe could not help but like; and the bold dash for the window, thedisarming of the purse-proud Buckingham, who for many reasons displeasedhim, and the leap to the sward below, with the accompanying farewell,had especially delighted both his manhood and his sense of humour.

  He had, therefore, dismissed Adair from his mind, except as a possiblesubject to banter Nell withal, or as a culprit to punish, if overtaken.

  His restless spirit had chafed under the Duchess's lavishentertainment--for the best entertainment is dull to the lover whosesweetheart is absent--and he had turned instinctively from the ball toNell's terrace, regardless of the hour and scarce noticing his constantattendants.

  The night was so beautiful that their souls had found vent in song.

  This serenade, however, had brought to Nell's window a wide-awakefellow, who had revealed himself in saucy talk; and the delightedcavaliers, in hope of fun, had charged jeeringly that they had outwittedthe guard and had found Adair.

  It was this that had brought the anxious look to the King's face; and,though his better judgment was still unchanged, the sight of the knaveat the window, together with the suggestions of his merry followers, hadcast a shadow of doubt for the moment upon his soul, and he hadreflected that there was much that the Irish youth had said that couldnot be reconciled with that better judgment.

  With a careless shrug, he had, therefore, taken up the jest of hislawless crew, which coincided with his own intended purpose, and hadsworn that he would turn the household out of bed without regard topretty protests or formality of warrant. He would raise the questionforthwith, in jest and earnest, and worry Nell about the boaster.

  "Scurvy entertainment," he began, with frowning brow.

  "Yea, my liege," explained Nell, winsomely; "you see--I did not expectthe King so late, and so was unpresentable."

  "It is the one you do not expect," replied Charles, dryly, "who alwayscauses the trouble, Nell."

  "We were in bed, Sire," threw in Moll, thinking to come to the rescue ofher mistress.

  "Marry, truly," said Nell, catching at the cue, "--asleep, Sire, soundasleep; and our prayers said."

  "Tilly-vally," exclaimed the King, "we might credit thy tongue, wench,but for the prayers. No digressions, spider Nell. My sword is in afighting mood. 'Sdeath, call forth the knight-errant who holds thyerrant heart secure for one short hour!"

  "The knight of my heart!" cried Nell. "Ah, Sire, you know his name."

  She looked at his Majesty with eyes of unfailing love; but the King wastrue to his jest.

  "Yea, marry, I do," laughed Charles, tauntingly, with a wink at hiscompanions; "a pretty piece of heraldry, a bold escutcheon, a daintyponiard--pale as a lily, and how he did sigh and drop his lids and smirkand smirk and dance your latest galliard to surpass De Grammont. Askbrother James how he did dance."

  "Nay, Sire," hastily interceded the ever-gallant Rochester, "hisHighness of York has suffered enough."

  York frowned at the reference; for he had been robbed of his lady at thedance by Adair. He could not forget that. Heedless of his royalty,bestowed by man, she, like the others, had followed in the train of theIrish spark, who was royal only by nature.

  "Hang the coxcomb!" he snarled.

  "'Slife, I will," replied Charles, slyly, "an you overtake him,brother."

  "His back was shapely, Sire," observed Rochester, with quaint humour.

  "Yea, and his heels!" cried the King, reflectively. "He had such daintyheels--Mercury's wings attached, to waft him on his way."

  "This is moonshine madness!" exclaimed Nell, with the blandest of blandsmiles. "There's none such here. By my troth, I would there were. Nay,ask Moll."

  Moll did not wait to be asked.

  "Not one visitor to-night," she asserted promptly.

  "Odso!" cried Charles, in a mocking tone. "Whence came the Jack at thewindow--the brave young challenger--'Would ye raise honest men fromtheir beds at such an hour?'"

  A burst of laughter followed the King's grave imitation of thewindow-boaster.

  "Sire!" sighed Rochester, in like spirit. "'Do you think this avintner's? There are no topers here.'"

  Another burst of merry laughter greeted the speaker, as he punctuatedhis words by catching up the wine-cups from the table and clinking themgaily.

  Nell's face was as solemn as a funeral.

  "To your knees, minx," commanded James, grimly, "and crave mercy of yourprince."

  "Faith and troth," pleaded Nell, seriously, "'t was I myself with helmetand mantle on. You see, Sire, my menials were guests at Portsmouth'sball--to lend respectability."

  "Saucy wag," cried the Merry Monarch. "A ball?--A battle--which wouldhave killed thee straight!"

  "It had liked to," reflected Nell, as she tartly replied: "A war of thesex without me? It was stupid, then. The Duchess missed me, I trow."

  "Never fear," answered Charles, with difficulty suppressing his mirth;"you were bravely championed."

  "I am sure of that," said Nell, slyly; "my King was there."

  "And a bantam cock," ejaculated Charles, sarcastically, "upon whose lips'Nell' hung familiarly."

  "Some strange gallant," cried Nell, in ecstasy, "took my part beforethem all? Who was he, Sire? Don't tantalize me so."

  She smiled, half serious, half humorous, as she pleaded in her charmingway.

  "A chip from the Blarney Stone," observed the King at length,ironically, "surnamed Adair!"

  "Adair! Adair!" cried Nell, to the astonishment of all. "We spent ouryouth together. I see him in my mind's eye, Sire, throw down thegauntlet in Nell's name and defy the world for her. Fill the cups. We'lldrink to my new-found hero! Fill! Fill! To Beau Adair, as you love me,gallants! Long life to Adair!"

  The cups were filled to overflowing and trembled on eager lips inresponse to the hostess's merry toast.

  "Stay!" commanded the King, in peremptory tones. "Not a drop to acoward!"

  "A coward!" cried Nell, aghast. "Adair a coward? I'll never credit it,Sire!"

  She turned away, lest she reveal her merriment, as she bethought her:"He is trembling in my boots now. I can feel him shake."

  "Our pledge is Nell, Nell only!" exclaimed the King, his cup high inair.

  With one accord, the gallants eagerly took up the royal pledge. "Aye,aye, Nell!" "Nell!" "We'll drink to Nell!"

  "You do me honour, royal gentlemen," bowed Nell, well pleased at theKing's toast.

  She had scarce touched the cup to her lips, however, with a mentalchuckle, "Poor Adair! Here's a health to the inner man!" when her eyefell upon one of Adair's gray boots, which Moll had failed to hide, inher excitement, now revealing itself quite plainly in the light of themany candles. She caught it adroitly on the tip of her toe and sent itwhizzing through the air in the direction of poor Moll, who,fortunately, caught it in midair and hid it quickly beneath her apron.

  The King turned at the sound; but Nell's face was as woefullyunconcerned as a church-warden's at his hundredth burial.

  The wine added further zest to the merry-making and the desire forsport.

  "Now, fair huswife," continued Charles, his thoughts reverting to Adair,"set forth the dish, that we may carve it to our liking. 'Tis a daintybit,--lace, velvet and ruffles."

  "Heyday, Sire," responded Nell, evasively, "the lard
er's empty."

  "Devil on't," cried Charles, ferociously; "no mincing, wench. In theconfusion of the ball, the bird escaped my guard by magic. We knowwhither the flight."

  The King assumed a knowing look.

  "Escaped the guard?" gasped Nell, in great surprise. "Alas, I trow somepetticoat has hid him then."

  "I'll stake my life upon't," observed James, who had not been heard fromin some time but who had been observing the scene with decorous dignity.

  "Sire, you would not injure Adair," pleaded Nell, now alert, with allher arts of fascination. "You are too generous. Blue eyes of heaven, andsuch a smile! Did you mark that young Irishman's smile, Sire?"

  Her impudence was so bewitching that the King scarce knew whether itwere jest or earnest. He sprang to his feet from the couch, where he hadthrown himself after the toast to Nell, and, with some forcefulness,exclaimed:

  "Odsfish, this to my teeth, rogue! Guard the doors, gallants; we'd gazeupon this paragon."

  "And set him pirouetting, Sire," sardonically suggested James.

  "Yea, to the tune of these fiddle-sticks," laughed Charles, as heunsheathed his rapier. "Search from tile to rafter."

  "Aye, aye," echoed the omnipresent Rochester, "from cellar to garret."

  Before, however, the command could be obeyed, even in resolution, Nellmoved uneasily to a curtain which hung in the corner of the room andplaced herself before it, as if to shield a hidden man.

  "Sire," she pleaded fearfully, "spare him, Sire; for my sake, Sire. Heis not to blame for loving me. He cannot help it. You know that, Sire!"

  "Can he really be here?" muttered Charles, with clouding visage. "Saucywench! Hey! My blood is charging full-tilt through my veins. Odsfish,we'll try his mettle once again."

  "Prythee, Sire," begged Nell, "he is too noble and brave and handsome todie. I love his very image."

  "Oh, ho!" cried Charles. "A silken blind for the silken bird! Hey, St.George for merry England! Come forth, thou picture of cowardice, thouvile slanderer."

  He grasped Nell by the wrist and fairly dragged her across the room.Then, rushing to the curtain, he seized its silken folds and tore itcompletely from its hangings--only to face himself in a large mirror."Ods-pitikins, my own reflection!" he exclaimed, with menacing tone,though there was relief as well in his voice. He bent the point of hisblade against the floor, gazed at himself in the pier-glass and lookedover his shoulder at Nell, who stood in the midst of his courtiers,splitting her sides with laughter, undignified but honest.

  "Rogue, rogue," he cried, "I should turn the point on thee for thistrick; but England would be worse than a Puritan funeral with no Nell.Thou shalt suffer anon."

  "I defy thee, Sire, and all thy imps of Satan," laughed the vixen, asshe watched the King sheathe his jewelled sword. "Cast Nell in theblackest dungeon, Adair is her fellow-prisoner; outlaw Nell, Adair isher brother outlaw; off with Nell's head, off rolls Adair's. Who elsecan boast so true a love!"

  "Thou shalt be banished the realm," decided the King, jestingly; for hewas now convinced that her Adair was but a jest to tease him--a Rolandfor his Oliver.

  "Banished!" cried Nell, with bated breath.

  "Aye; beyond sea, witch!" answered the King, with pompous austerity."Virginia shall be thy home."

  "Good, good!" laughed Nell, gaily. "Sire, the men grow handsome inVirginia, and dauntless; and they tell me there are a dearth of womenthere. Oh, banish me at once to--What's the name?"

  "Jamestown," suggested York, recalling the one name because of itsfamiliar sound.

  "Yea, brother James," said Nell, fearlessly mimicking his brusqueaccent, "Jamestown."

  "Savages, wild men, cannibals," scowled Charles.

  "Cannibals!" cried Nell. "Marry, I should love to be a cannibal. Arethere cannibals in Jamestown, brother James? Banish me, Sire; banish meto Jamestown of all places. Up with the sails, my merry men; give me thehelm! Adair will sail in the same good ship, I trow."

  "Adair! I trow thou wert best at home, cannibal Nelly," determined theKing.

  "Then set all the men in Britain to watch me, Sire," said Nell; "for,from now on, I'll need it."

  The King shook his finger warningly at her, then leaned carelesslyagainst the window.

  "Ho there!" he cried out suddenly. "A night disturbance, a drunkenbrawl, beneath our very ears! Fellow-saints, what mean my subjects fromtheir beds this hour of night? Their sovereign does the revelling forthe realm. James, Rochester and all, see to 't!"