by Odette Stone
I woke up a second time. I thought I had heard Jackson come in, but he hadn’t come upstairs. On my way downstairs, I found him standing in Alien’s room. He stood in the middle of the room, his hands on his hips as he took in the mural.
The nighttime scene depicted little bear in bed, leaning up against father bear, who sat in bed with him and read him a bedtime story. Mother bear folded clothes and listened with a smile on her face. Grandma and grandpa bear looked on from the doorway with smiles on their faces. I had wanted the father bear and little bear relationship to be predominant in the mural.
He glanced at me in the doorway, but he didn’t speak. His face was blank, but the intensity in the way he studied the mural belied his disinterest. What was he thinking? Did he remember his mom when he looked at these childhood characters? I had wanted to honor his relationship that he had with his mom, but the amount of emotion that I could feel him hiding was catching me off guard.
He turned his attention to me. “I see that Alien’s crib has arrived.”
“I haven’t had a chance to put it together,” I lied. As if I had any intention of building that thing myself.
His head whipped over to me. “You think I’m not going to man up and build our kid’s crib?”
“Oh, well. If you want to.”
“Damn straight I will.”
I had to turn my face away, to hide my smile that threatened to give away my game.
His lips twitched. “Did you just play me?”
“I would never.”
He grabbed me around the waist. “I walked into that.”
“Well, it worked.”
He slapped me on the ass. “So, there are a bunch of guys that want to go out tonight.”
“Okay.”
“Wives are included.”
“I can make that work.”
Chapter 33
Despite our joking, there was a distance between us that made my heart ache. Instead of finding that place where we were in sync, we felt like two polite strangers.
The day passed, and then we took a taxi to the bar. I wore a cute little yellow sundress and a pair of flats, coupled with a jean jacket.
“MacDog!” Someone yelled across the bar. Hand in his, I followed him across the huge bar, looking around. There were pool tables in one corner. There was a stage where a band was setting up. He led me to a couple of tables that were pushed together, filled with faces that were starting to look familiar.
“Emily,” Lauren called, “Come over and sit here with us.”
I pulled my hand out of Jackson’s hand and made my way over to Lauren. I glanced over my shoulder. He stood there, watching me. I recognized a few of the women from the Scentsy party. They made room for me to sit with them.
“Thanks,” I smiled. Jackson made his way over to where the men played darts. He laughed at something one of them said. He needed this. This was his community. These people were his comrades, his fellow soldiers and he needed to meet with them socially. I understood that, and I wanted that for him.
As the night wore on, everyone around me, including the wives, seemed to consume copious amounts of alcohol. If I wasn’t pregnant, I was pretty sure I would be flat on my face by now. As it was, I was potentially the only sober person in the entire bar.
The women huddled down on one end of the table discussing school politics. The men passionately competed at darts and drank their faces off. I felt all the muscles in my body tense when I noticed Harper approach the men. She was wearing a short jean miniskirt that was halfway up her long, lean legs coupled with a white, button up shirt that was open far enough to show plenty of cleavage and tied around her midriff. Her long blonde hair was sexy messy.
“I was telling the math teacher, there is no reason to punish Ben with extra homework. He needs help not more work.”
Harper walked right up to Jackson who was about to take his turn at the dart board. He looked down at her and said something that made her laugh. I felt my cheeks flush. Something ugly crawled in my stomach.
“Well, did you hear what the gym teacher did to the grade six class? They had to do boot camp in the rain. Those kids were freezing. I phoned the teacher and told her that this wasn’t BUDs training, this was physical education.”
Jackson finished tossing his darts and walked back to the high table. Harper followed him. He took a sip of his beer. I watched as she took the bottle from him and took a drink off his beer. She talked with a huge smile on her face. She said something that made them both laugh. I watched as she leaned down on the table, pushing up her cleavage, so it was spilling out of her shirt. She looked ridiculously sexy.
It was Jackson’s turn to shoot again, only this time he gave Harper his darts. He looked over her shoulder as she took her aim and tossed the dart. She apparently made a great shot because she turned around and gave him a quick hug.
I wanted to puke. Instead, I stood up. On unsteady legs, I walked to the washrooms. I washed my hands and stared back at my reflection. My belly beneath my loose dress looked less like a baby and instead I just looked short and chubby. My face was chalk white.
I couldn’t compete with that. Harper was everything I wasn’t. She was tall, curvy, sexy and blonde. I was a short, pregnant and a shy redhead and I felt so low, I could barely deal.
It didn’t matter how much he told me there was nothing between them. Those were all lies. The moment those two came together, sparks were flying off them both. He was committed to me, but I knew in my heart that he loved her.
I dried my hands on a paper towel and straightened my shoulders. Jealousy burned in my gut. My husband was in love with another woman, and I hated my life.
I weighed my options. Runaway? Leave the bar? Pick a fight? Been there, done that. Nothing made a difference. Now it was time just to accept the truth of the matter. At some point, I knew in my heart, that he would leave me for her. I wasn’t going to solve anything tonight. My goal was to make it through the evening in one piece. I would smile, laugh, and pretend to be happy. Right now that was the only strategy I could think of.
I walked back towards the tables when someone grabbed my arm.
“45 calories.”
Despite my mood, I smiled. “Burger guy.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Watching everyone else drink, you?”
“Same.”
“You’re not drinking?”
He shook his head. “BUDs is too intense. We have tonight off, and tomorrow when they put us through the most insane exercises, I would rather not be hung over.”
His discipline impressed me. “Good for you. Is it going okay?”
“It’s what I expected.”
He looked behind him. “My pool partner just took off after some chick. Wanna play a game?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I’m a terrible pool player.”
“Just play a round with me so I can hold the table.”
I glanced over to where Harper and Jackson were engrossed in their dart game. My teeth ground. “Sure. Why not.”
I kept my back to Jackson and Harper. I didn’t want to see them. It made me feel too bad. Mark racked up the table and then let me take the first shot. As promised, I was terrible.
“Tell you what, I’ll give myself a handicap,” Mark offered.
“What is that?”
“I have to sink all of my balls and two of yours.”
“That sounds like cheating to me.”
“Not at all. It'll even the playing field a bit.”
We started to play. I could barely hit the white ball, much less hit the other balls with the white ball.
“Want a tip?”
“Sure.”
“Hold your cue like this,” he leaned over the table and demonstrated. “And you look down the cue like this. See how this creates a line?”
I leaned awkwardly over the table. He moved beside me and adjusted my elbow, my hand and then my fingers around the cue.
“Loosen up your grip her
e, you’ve got a death grip,” he teased.
I started to laugh. “I can’t help it.”
“I’m going to need to get some pliers to loosen you up.”
I put my head down, laughing as he tried to pry my fingers off the cue. He looked over my shoulder. “Yup. See how the cue makes a perfect line towards the white ball?”
“Yes.”
“Now gently, just slide it back and shoot.”
I did as instructed and managed to pocket one of my balls.
“I did it!”
“That was fantastic. Now you get to take another shot.”
I moved around the table. “Like this?”
He came over and looked over my shoulder, adjusting the cue. “There.”
I took the shot and watched as the ball rolled towards the pocket. Suddenly a large hand stopped the ball.
I lifted my eyes, and there stood Jackson.
“Hey,” I straightened up. “You just messed up my shot. That would have gone in.”
He walked around the table, zero expression on his face. He tugged the pool cue from my hand and then laid it on the table. “I want to talk.”
“Right now?” My eyes widened.
He took my hand, and without looking at Mark, he pulled me behind him, across the bar. He pulled me down a dark hallway, around the corner from the washrooms.
I looked up at my husband in the dark shadows and knew that he wasn’t happy. Well, that made two of us.
“Jackson, what are you doing?”
He moved towards me, not speaking. I stepped back until my back was against the wall. He put one big hand against the wall beside my head and loomed over me.
“Did you forget something?” his voice was conversational.
“No.”
He traced a long finger across my collarbone and then slowly down my sternum. Shivers coursed through my body. “Did you forget who your husband was?”
I looked up at his face. “No. Of course not.”
He wrapped one big hand around my neck and then his mouth was feasting on mine. His lips bit, nibbled, nipped and coaxed me until I was fairly swooning beneath him. My body responded to his smoldering kiss. A spark was flared, igniting in me an intense craving for this man who so easily tortured me.
“Jackson,” I gasped, as he bent his head, working his lips down my neck, stimulating every nerve along the way.
“I think you need a little reminder,” he said, as his lips brushed against my collarbone.
“I know who I’m married to,” I said, my eyes shut, my head against the wall.
My eyes flew open when I felt a big hand slide up my thigh, pushing beneath my skirt.
I felt scandalized. “Jackson!”
His mouth covered mine again, making my head spin. I felt one of his feet kick my legs apart and then my eyes went wide in panic as I felt his fingers lightly trace over my panties.
I jerked my head back from his kiss. “What are you doing?”
His green eyes glittered in the shadows, as I felt him push a finger beneath my panties and then he was sliding along my most private parts.
In a panic, I tried to hold his thick wrist, “Not here!”
“Shhh,” he soothed, as his long finger slowly pushed inside of me. His touch provoked the most intense heat to wash over my body. Transfixed, I succumbed to his touch.
My head rolled back against the wall, as his fingers pushed deeper into me. Tormenting me. Teasing me to the point that I felt I was going to go mad. His stubble scraped my neck, his lips, sucked on a sensitive nerve, my head lolled back while his buried fingers swirled and caressed me. My hips were rolling, pushing towards his hands, wanting more. My back arched. I was breathing hard. A sob escaped me when his fingers curled up, to skim something inside of me that made my knees weak.
“Jackson,” I begged.
“What do you want?”
“You.”
Chapter 34
He moved so fast, my head spun. One minute I was pinned against the wall, with his fingers deep inside of me, and then I was being dragged down the hallway, and we pushed through the back door.
I stumbled into the dark back alley. There was a picnic table against the wall. Jackson spun me around, so my hands were flat on the table. I groaned as I felt him flip up my skirt and then he pulled my panties down my hips.
I looked around franticly, completely aware that anyone, at any moment, could walk outside and see me naked from the waist down, legs spread and bent over the picnic table.
“Jackson,” I gasped, looking over my shoulder. “Someone could see us.”
“So, let them watch.”
I heard the rasp of a zipper, and then his huge glorious girth pushed up inside of me. I mewed, my head dropped forward as he filled me completely.
“You like that?”
“Oh God,” I groaned, as I felt his big hands on my hips. He began to thrust into me without apology. Goosebumps covered my skin as I felt him pull my hips back and push harder up into me. He was huge, plundering into me without apology. The cool air on my naked skin was a contrast to the searing heat that was threatening to combust me. His movements were relentless as he penetrated me with both force and speed. I felt his teeth nip my shoulder, but all I could focus on was how filthy and erotic it felt to be taken in such a primal way.
“You think that maybe Mark wanted to bend you over the pool table and take you like this?”
“No,” I gasped, my entire body in overdrive. Rushes of pleasure washed over me with each powerful thrust.
I felt so exposed, and this situation felt so dangerous, so forbidden, all I could do was hold myself up against that table while my husband invaded me with a fierceness that was uniquely Jackson.
A dangerous throb pulsed inside of me as he pushed me towards the edge. I didn’t want this to end. I fought my climax.
He grabbed my hair and yanked my head back. “I think my wife needed a little reminder who she’s married to.”
“I remember,” I whimpered. My legs shook so hard that they were threatening to collapse beneath me. All I could focus on was his rigid length that invaded me with each delicious thrust. His big hand came around my neck, holding me in place and with that, I spasmed around him, flying apart with an earth-shattering orgasm.
“That’s it,” he hissed. And then he crushed me with long hard strokes before he swore with his release.
My entire body shuddered around him. Jello legs shook. Heart pounded. I stood there, clutching that table, while he pulled out. I heard his zipper come up and then strong hands pulled up my panties. He flipped my skirt back down over my thighs.
I turned around. We looked at each other. Both of us still breathing hard. He dropped a hard kiss on my lips. “Don’t forget again.”
After that performance. I just might.
I was half dazed as he took my hand and led me back into the bar. He dropped me back off to where the women were still sitting around talking. On shaking legs, I dropped to my seat.
“Hey, where did you go?” Lauren asked.
“Just went to get some air,” my voice shook. I looked over to where Jackson stood and talked to some guys. He took a sip of his beer, his eyes never leaving my face. I looked around the bar. Harper was nowhere to be found.
My husband had wholly ravished me. In a public place. I wanted to laugh and cover my face and blush with embarrassment. Instead, I just sat there with the women. I laughed and talked, pretending that everything was okay, but my body felt like it was in overdrive.
Countless times, I would look up, my eyes seeking out Jackson. It didn’t matter where he was. Talking to his buddies. Playing pool. Sitting at the table. Every time I looked up, he was already watching me with a dark, impossible-to-read expression on his face. A look that made my knees weak.
I should be furious about how he manhandled me. I should be insulted that he thought I would cheat on him with the skinny, gentle kid who was teaching me to play pool. The truth? I loved every single s
econd of his intense gaze, the ferocious way he took me and how it made me feel so desired and wanted. It filled me with hope.
The strange idea that Jackson could be jealous of Burger kid filled me with more hope than I had felt in months. There was an equally good chance that this was just the Navy SEAL part of him that didn’t like to lose, but I clung to the idea that maybe there was a tiny part of him that cared.
By the time we left the bar, I was dead on my feet. It was a good four hours past my usual bedtime, and I wanted to lie down and shut my eyes. We were silent in the cab, and I felt myself nodding off. I felt Jackson lift me across the back seat and then I was snuggling up against him.
“Thanks,” I mumbled. Loving how warm he was, how good he smelled.
It seemed like only a moment had passed and then Jackson was talking to me. “Come on. We’re home.”
I was so tired I felt drunk. I brushed my teeth and collapsed in bed.
I woke up to light streaming into the bedroom and the sound of Jackson talking to Chloe. I smiled into my pillow.
“What do you think, do you think this goes here?”
No response from Chloe.
“Well, look at this. It fits. Can you pass me the screwdriver? No? You’re just going to lie there and look cute?”
Silence from Chloe.
I moved to the doorway of Alien’s room. Jackson sat on the floor, head bent over a partially built piece of furniture. Chloe lay on her side and wagged her tail when she saw me. Jackson had already assembled the crib and the matching dresser.
He glanced up at me but didn’t speak. God this man confused me.
“Wow, you assembled Alien’s bed.”
I stepped over Chloe and walked over to the beautiful mahogany crib, running my hand over the smooth wood. He had placed the mattress in the crib. I looked down at the bed, and my heart pounded in my throat. One day Alien would leave the safety of my body and would be out in the world. Tiny and helpless. And I would be responsible for his care. The thought was almost paralyzing.
Jackson stood up behind me and slid the dropside rail down. “Here’s the clasp to move the rail up and down.”