Once Burned

by Alexa Land

But Ignacio didn’t reach for it. “I meant what I said in my letter. I want those proceeds to go to Nana and Ollie’s transition shelter. That wasn’t because I thought I wouldn’t be here to collect the check. It’s because I want to give something back, after everything Ollie’s done for me.”

  Christopher said, “Are you sure, though? There’s a pretty hefty check in this envelope, and since you don’t have another show on the books, won’t you need this money to live on?”

  “You also bought me a cottage in Ireland with all your savings,” I murmured.

  But Ignacio just shook his head. “I want that money to go to the shelter. I just need to get a job, and then I’ll be alright.”

  “You have a job.” Christopher put down the envelope and said, “Ollie’s been talking for months about pulling together a one-man show for you. I know he was trying to get creative with the venue, but I don’t think he ever found anything, so let’s hold it here. Do you have some paintings ready?”

  “No. I’ve just been working on personal stuff over the last few months, including those murals I donated to the community center in Barcelona.” He frowned and added, “They’ll probably paint over them when they find out I’m not actually Spanish.”

  “Then they’re assholes,” I muttered.

  Ignacio said, “Even if I had some paintings ready to go, I couldn’t show them here, Christopher. It would be the kiss of death for your gallery. It’s just a matter of time before this news leaks out, and then I’m going to be a pariah in the art world. There’s no way I’m dragging you down with me.”

  “I’m not even sort of worried about that,” Christopher said. “I offered to sell your paintings initially because I think they’re something special. That hasn’t changed. As far as worrying about potential backlash from the art world, fuck those pretentious assholes.”

  I said, “I know this isn’t my area of expertise, but I just had an idea. Ignacio, when I first found out about all of this, I remember thinking that you were your greatest creation. You invented this strong, confident character to represent you in the art world, because that was the only way you could play the game. You weren’t honest about your true identity, but you had valid reasons for doing that, including a decade of rejection and being treated like an outcast.

  “Now you’re concerned about what’ll happen when the news leaks out. So, here’s my idea: don’t wait for it to leak, and don’t treat it like a dirty little secret. Do the exact opposite. Make it the subject of your one-man show. Call it something like…I don’t know, behind the mask, or artist exposed, or whatever. Then include your story in the art show. Make sure people learn the why behind it, and just own it.”

  Christopher exclaimed, “Oh my God, that’s brilliant! I should have thought of it myself! We absolutely need to do this, and the sooner the better. I don’t know how many people know about this, but it’s critical that you go public before anyone else does.”

  Ignacio mulled it over before saying, “I actually love this idea. We don’t really have to rush, since the only people who know my secret are the three of us and Ollie and his family, and I’d obviously hold off on sending that letter to the gallery in L.A. until after the show. Then again, I guess I don’t want to wait too long, either. I won’t be able to rest easy until I go public and see what the repercussions are going to be. There’s only one problem: it’ll take me months to produce enough paintings to fill a show.”

  I said, “Actually, you already have what you need. I know you wanted to keep your self-portraits private, but they really are stunningly beautiful and so powerful, Ignacio. They deserve to be seen and appreciated.”

  “Artist exposed is right.” He paused for a moment, then said, “Those paintings are intensely personal, but they’re actually exactly what I need for a show like this.”

  Christopher asked, “How many are there?”

  “Nine.”

  “And they’re brilliant,” I added.

  “How long would it take you to paint three more? If we had a dozen in the collection, that’d be perfect for a one-man show.” Christopher was already flipping through the planner on his desk.

  Ignacio said, “Maybe…two weeks each.”

  Christopher’s blue eyes lit up. “That’s perfect! I’d been thinking about doing a Valentine’s Day event, but I never pulled it together, so there’s nothing on my calendar for mid-February. Six weeks would give me plenty of time for advertising, having signs and brochures printed, and so on. Hey, I have a friend who’s a filmmaker, and we should hire him to make a short film of you telling your story in your own words. Then we can play it on a loop as part of the exhibit.”

  “That sounds fantastic,” Ignacio said, “but are you absolutely sure you want to do this, Christopher? There’s every chance it could blow up in our faces. No matter what we do to try to mitigate the damage, the public and the art world might still turn on us.”

  Christopher flashed us a brilliant smile and said, “Bring it on.”

  *****

  We talked to Christopher for another hour, and when we finally left the gallery, we headed down the hill in the direction of the Golden Gate Bridge. Ignacio was lost in thought. Eventually, we reached the edge of the bay, which was steel gray under an overcast sky, and sat down on a bench.

  After a moment, I realized it was the exact place we’d ended up after our first night together. Ignacio noticed it too, and he murmured, “I feel like you brought me here to break up with me, like it’s a full-circle kind of thing.”

  “We actually ended up here randomly. As far as breaking up, don’t you hear me when I tell you I love you?”

  Ignacio turned to face me and said, “I do hear you, but it’s just so overwhelming. I went from having nothing and no one to this amazing life, with a kind, wonderful boyfriend and terrific friends, people who stick by me even when I totally fuck up. I might even still have a career after my one-man show, but that feels like way too much to hope for. If you knew who I used to be and where I came from, you’d understand why all of this seems too good to be true.”

  “I think I have some idea. After you left the cottage, I had a friend search the police database for me, and I read about your life before. I even saw a mug shot.”

  His dark eyes went wide, and he blurted, “How could you possibly want anything to do with me after seeing all of that?”

  “Because it’s not who you are. It’s not even who you were then. I saw your eyes in that mug shot, and I know how sad and alone you were. I also know how much you struggled back then, and how much you overcame. Why would I hold it against you?”

  He wrapped his arms around me, and his voice was rough when he whispered, “Thank you for believing in me.”

  “Right back at you.” I put my head on his shoulder and hugged him, and after a moment, I murmured, “You know, you act like I’m doing you a favor by staying with you. But I’ve always known I’m the one who got damn lucky in this relationship.”

  Ignacio leaned back a little and tilted my chin so I was looking in his eyes. His voice was gentle when he said, “You don’t even get how amazing you are.”

  I muttered embarrassedly, “I think the word you’re looking for is ordinary.”

  He made an obnoxious buzzer sound, and I burst out laughing, just because it was so unexpected. “Nope, sorry,” he said, still holding my chin. “An intelligent, handsome, kind, loving man with the heart of a musician and the ass of a track star does not get to call himself ordinary.” I smiled at him, and he leaned in and kissed me.

  After a minute, I got up and took his hand. “It looks like it’s going to start raining any minute. Let’s get a cab and head indoors.”

  We started to cut across the field, and he asked, “Is it okay if I come back to your apartment? I’d like to spend the day with you before finding a hotel.”

  “That’s not going to happen.”

  “Oh, okay. That’s fine. We can just have the cab drop you off at your apartment, and then I’ll—�
�

  I stepped in front of him and stopped him by putting both hands on his chest. “The part that’s not going to happen is you finding a hotel. Move in with me, Ignacio.”

  “Wait…what?”

  “We were heading in that direction before Christmas,” I said. “You already had a key to the apartment, and we were spending every night together. So, let’s make it official.”

  “But now you know I lied to you.”

  “Nothing’s changed. When you hit a bump in the road, you don’t give up on where you were going. You just deal with it, and then you keep moving forward.”

  He whispered, “Thank you.”

  “No need to thank me.”

  He kissed me again and smiled at me, and then he said, “Let’s keep moving. I think I just felt a raindrop.”

  “Okay. You know though, we don’t have to go straight back to the apartment. There’s nothing much to do there.”

  He shook his head and said, “Wow, when you’re wrong, you’re wrong. There’s everything to do there.”

  “Such as?”

  “Uh, how about fucking like bunnies, then watching a Star Trek marathon on your computer until we’re rested enough to fuck some more? I seem to recall both of us admitting we’re Trekkies. I think I even showed you my nerdiest tattoo.”

  I turned and started running toward the street as I called, “I’ll race you to a cab!”

  Ignacio sprinted after me, and after a moment he yelled, “I’m only letting you win so I can watch that track star ass in motion!” Both of us burst out laughing, and we ran as fast as we could.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Mid-February

  “I don’t know if I can do this.”

  I turned to my boyfriend and took his hand. We were on the sidewalk in front of Christopher’s gallery. The building was festooned with a pair of huge, red banners, which said ‘Behind the Mask’ in elegant script, above the words: Ignacio Mondelvano: An Artist’s Journey. A capacity crowd was visible through the glass walls.

  “Sure you can,” I said. “I’ll be right beside you the whole time, and you’re going to knock ‘em dead. Did I mention you look amazing?”

  Ignacio was wearing a new, black suit, which I’d bought him for the occasion. He’d paired it with a black shirt that was open at the collar and a few silver and leather necklaces, which he’d collected on his travels. I loved the way the suit contrasted with his long hair, short, tidy beard, and vintage, black boots. He grinned a little and said, “About ten times. Thank you for that. You look pretty amazing too, you know.”

  I was wearing my best suit, the dark gray one I’d bought when we first started going out, which I’d paired with a crisp, royal blue dress shirt. For me, that bordered on flashy. “Thanks. Are you ready to go inside?”

  “I’m really not. I’m also second-guessing Christopher’s idea of us making a big entrance ninety minutes into the show. Maybe it’s going to come across as arrogant.”

  I said, “It’s brilliant. Everyone’s had time to study the paintings and watch the film, and now that they know your story, they’ll get to meet you in person.”

  I pulled two silk Lone Ranger-style masks out of my pocket and handed him one. Everyone had been given masks just like ours and were asked to put them on when they arrived at the gallery. That had been one of Christopher’s brilliant ideas for making the show an interactive experience.

  Ignacio admitted, “I feel completely vulnerable. I get that was the whole point of this show, but I can’t believe a few hundred people have seen the most personal paintings I’ve ever created and watched a little, eight-minute movie about how I’m a big, giant fraud.”

  “That’s not what the film was about. I think Christopher’s friend did a fantastic job telling your story.”

  “Still, though. What must they think of me?”

  I tilted my head toward the gallery and said, “Let’s climb those stairs and find out.”

  He muttered, “Yeah okay,” and we both put on our masks.

  I shot Christopher a quick text to let him know we were on our way in, and then I pulled Ignacio to me and kissed him passionately. “I’m so fucking proud of you,” I said as I ran my fingertips over his cheek. “It really doesn’t matter what that crowd’s reaction is, or if the art world tries to shun you now that the truth is out. Choosing to put your soul on display like you did with those paintings is the bravest thing I’ve ever seen, and your friends and I are behind you one hundred percent.”

  He smiled at me and said, “Come on, let’s get this over with.” Then he squared his shoulders and picked up my hand, and we climbed the stairs side-by-side.

  When we reached the top, he exhaled slowly. We glanced at each other, and I grinned at Ignacio and held the door for him. My heart was racing, so I could only imagine how he was feeling in that moment. He stepped into the gallery, and I slipped in behind him and put my arm around his waist.

  Christopher’s voice came over an intercom. He said, “Ladies and gentlemen, it’s my great honor to introduce you to Ignacio Mondelvano.”

  About two hundred and fifty people in black masks all turned to look at us. Ignacio followed Christopher’s plan. He pulled off his mask with a hand that was shaking slightly and tossed it aside. Then I and two hundred and fifty people pulled off our masks. In the next instant, they began to applaud.

  It was thunderous, so loud I could feel it reverberating in my chest. They cheered and whistled, and someone yelled, “Bravo!”

  Ignacio looked stunned. A tear tumbled down his cheek, and he put his arm around my shoulders. It took a long time for the applause to end, and as he started to speak, the crowd fell silent.

  “When I was growing up, I always felt like it was my mom and me against the world. Then she died, and I was so alone. I thought I’d be that way forever. But a few years ago, I met Ollie Caravetti, and later on, I met Christopher Andrews, and both of those men showed me what true friendship looks like. A few months ago, I met the love of my life, my wonderful boyfriend Cameron.” He picked up my hand and met my gaze with a look of pure adoration as he kissed my knuckle. Then he told his audience, “Every day, he shows me what it means to be loved unconditionally. It’s such an amazing gift to have people on your side who accept you no matter what. All of you made me feel accepted tonight, and I can’t thank you enough.” I touched his face and kissed him as the crowd broke into another round of deafening applause.

  It was pretty chaotic after that. Christopher and Ollie appeared beside us and took turns hugging Ignacio. After that, dozens of people came up to him. He posed for photos, and listened to people’s stories, and signed the beautiful keepsake booklets Christopher had printed for the event. They included photos of Ignacio throughout his life, along with a transcript of the short film and full-color pictures of the thirteen paintings in the show.

  The four new paintings all had something to do with the idea of ‘unmasking’. Only one canvas in the show wasn’t for sale. It was a larger than life portrait Ignacio had painted of the two of us, just the week before. In the painting, we were naked from the waist up and facing each other. I was pulling a black mask from Ignacio’s face, and at the same time, he was pulling a blue one from mine. I was glad we were keeping that canvas, and so proud of him for deciding to let go of the rest. He said they were a part of his old life, the one where he had to hide and pretend, and there was no point in hanging on to them.

  At one point during the onslaught of well-wishers, Dante made his way through the crowd and shook Ignacio’s hand. “I respect what you did here,” he said. His expression was still serious, and I didn’t think they were going to become BFFs any time soon, but it seemed like progress.

  When Dante and I stepped aside to make room for a group of young women who wanted to take selfies with Ignacio, I asked my friend, “Where’s your family?”

  “Charlie and the boys are parked in front of the buffet out on the deck. They decided to wait until the crowd died down a bit before co
ming over to say hello.”

  “Boys? Is Joely here, too?”

  Dante said, “Yup, he and his girlfriend Maya both decided to join us. Hey, guess what I found out tonight? Maya’s pregnant. She’s actually due within a week of my cousin Carla. In other words, she’s been pregnant for months and this is the first I’ve heard about it. Turns out, that’s why we’ve seen so little of Joely. The two of them had been avoiding me, because they were afraid they’d let their secret slip and I’d take it badly. Since she’s showing now, they finally decided it was time to confess.” A crease appeared between Dante’s brows, and a little muscle worked in his jaw as he ground his teeth together.

  “Holy shit. What are they going to do?”

  “Maya says she’s keeping it. She’s going to be moving in with us until the baby’s born, because her parents are livid. Since she’s ninety-eight pounds of pure attitude, that’ll be interesting.”

  “How furious are you about all of this?”

  He sighed and pushed his black hair off his forehead. “I want to yell at Joely for days. He’s a bright kid, and he knew better than to have unprotected sex! But what good will yelling do?”

  “Hang on,” I said, with a tinge of amusement in my voice. “Since you’re in the process of adopting Jayden and Joely, doesn’t this make you a grandpa?”

  Dante scowled at me. “Charlie and I are way too young for that shit, so don’t even go there.” I fought back a smile, and he changed the subject with, “Enough about that. Tonight’s about Ignacio, and it’s pretty fucking amazing that all his paintings sold in under an hour.”

  “Wait, what?”

  “Shit, I just stole Christopher’s thunder. But yeah, that happened. Christopher said he even charged twice Ignacio’s going rate, because he felt the artwork warranted that, and the buyers didn’t bat an eye. In fact, a few of them even got into bidding wars over some of the pieces and drove the price up even higher.”

  “Wow. Ignacio’s going to be floored.” My boyfriend was halfway across the room, talking to Nana and Ollie. He happened to glance at me just then, and his face lit up with the sweetest smile.