Lie For Me

by Ali Parker

  I nodded. “Okay. I feel like I need to tell you, you are the only person I’ve ever done that with.”

  She laughed. “I don’t think I’m the only person,” she teased. “I got the impression you were well versed in what we did.”

  I couldn’t help but preen under the compliment. I had been second-guessing myself and my talents. She just gave me the thumbs-up. “I meant with a guest. I don’t want you thinking I hook up with all the pretty ladies that stay here. What happened between the two of us was the first time for me.”

  She smiled, her green eyes dancing with amusement. “Are you saying I’m special?”

  “Very,” I answered. “You are a very special woman. I’ve enjoyed the brief time we’ve had together.”

  Her sweet smile warmed my heart. “I have as well.”

  “This weekend certainly turned out different than I expected. I was prepared to hide from all the math nerds.”

  She burst into laughter. “Oh, that’s nice.”

  “Nothing personal, but accountants are not exactly known for their exciting lifestyles,” I said with a laugh.

  “No, I don’t suppose we are.”

  “You’ve changed my opinion,” I told her.

  She looked up at me, her eyes searching mine. “I wasn’t exactly thrilled to be visiting a wilderness retreat. I’m not a big fan of the great outdoors. I was expecting cold and wet and completely uncomfortable. I like it here. It’s very cozy and inviting and super clean.”

  “I’ll be here,” I blurted out. “If you ever want to come back for a visit, I’ll be here. Always. This is me extending an open invitation to you and the girls.”

  “I appreciate that. I know the girls would love to come back again.”

  It gave me hope. I hoped it wasn’t just words. She might be trying to appease me. We leisurely strolled the grounds until it was close to noon. I didn’t want her to leave. I couldn’t explain why I was so drawn to the woman, but I felt a connection to her that was unlike anything I had experienced before.

  “I should probably get going,” she said as we rounded the corner back to the cabin area. “We’ve got a short drive and then a ton of laundry and catching up to do.”

  “I understand. I’ll help you with your bags.”

  We walked to my cabin and collected the suitcases. Together, we walked to her car. It wasn’t hard to find it, considering it was the only one left in the parking area.

  “Say goodbye to Gabriel, girls,” Cadence said.

  Autumn threw her arms around my waist. “Thank you for taking us on a walk and showing us the birds.”

  “You’re very welcome. I enjoyed hanging out with you guys.” I looked at Hazel. She was hanging back, but I could see her watching. “I hope you’ll come back for another visit, Hazel.”

  She smiled. “I want to see the birds.”

  “They’ll be here in a few months. You’ll love the bird songs.”

  She walked closer. I could see her hesitating, unsure what to do. I extended my hand, offering her a handshake. She shook it, her bright grin making me smile.

  “All right, girls, get in the car,” Cadence said.

  They got into the backseat, leaving me and Cadence staring at each other. I would have loved to give her a kiss, but that wasn’t in the cards. “I hope to see you again.”

  “Bye, Gabriel,” she said with a smile, making no promises.

  I watched as she got in the car and pulled away. Her departure left an absence I had never experienced before. I walked back to the dining hall, knowing Leo was probably pissed I had disappeared for so long. I pushed open the door to the dining hall and looked around. He’d been busy. Everything was almost taken care of.

  “Hello?” I called.

  “In here,” Leo answered from the kitchen. “Did you get laid?”

  I rolled my eyes. I was damn glad no one else was with me. That would have been awkward. “No, asshole.”

  He walked out of the kitchen drying his hands on a towel. “It was a good question. You were gone long enough. Then again, if your past performance is taken into account, you would have only needed five minutes instead of two hours.”

  “Fuck you.”

  He laughed. “So? Did you get her number?”

  “She has my number. I didn’t have the balls to ask her for hers. Although if I wanted to, it would be easy enough to track her down. I know where she works.”

  He burst into laughter. “That’s my boy.”

  I grinned. “I’m going to start the initial cleanup. Thanks for covering for me.”

  “No problem. You can kick a nice Christmas bonus my way and we’ll call it even.”

  Chapter 14

  Cadence

  I kept looking in my rearview mirror. It had nothing to do with me checking the traffic and more about me looking back. Looking back and remembering the weekend. Remembering Gabriel. He had been a surprise. A very welcome, lovely surprise. My body was still humming after what he had done to me. I audibly sighed.

  “I can’t wait to tell my friends about the birds,” Hazel said.

  She shocked me with her enthusiasm. “I’m glad you guys had fun,” I replied.

  “I had lots of fun,” Autumn said. “I want to go back. I want to sleep in a tent and roast marshmallows. How come we didn’t get to roast marshmallows?”

  “Because it was too cold to be outside,” I answered. “Next time.”

  I heard myself say it and realized I was already planning on a return visit. I couldn’t, could I? What would that mean if I went back? Would he expect us to hang out or sleep together? Would I? I didn’t even know how much he charged for a cabin rental. Would he charge me?

  There were more questions than answers and I didn’t know if it was worth trying to sort through. I had told him it was better to leave things as they were, and it was true. It was the right thing to do. I was in no position to try and have a relationship with a man. I was struggling to have a relationship with my girls.

  I had to leave it be. I could admit the thought of never seeing him again did make me a little sad. He was a good guy and I did enjoy our time together, even if it had been very brief. I got lost in my own thoughts as I drove the rest of the way back to my mom’s house. The girls were actually talking to each other instead of arguing and nitpicking one another.

  It was nice. If a weekend away produced results like that, I was seriously going to have to think about doing it more often. Mom had been right. A little time away with the three of us getting to be together was exactly what we all needed.

  The girls wanted to see their Nanny and tell her all about their trip. I agreed to stop by her house for a short visit before we had to get home so I could get started on my weekend chores. As much as I loved getting away, it didn’t change the fact there was still clothes to be washed and a house to be cleaned.

  I parked the car at my mom’s, debating how much I would tell her about the trip. I didn’t want a lecture, but I did have a good time and wanted to share it. I made my decision as I walked up to the door. I’d keep it to myself. My mother and I were close, but she didn’t need to know all the details of my life.

  By the time I made it into the kitchen where my mother was pulling out a batch of cookies from the oven, the girls were each talking a mile a minute.

  “Let’s sit down and you can tell me all about it with fresh cookies,” she told them.

  “Take off your coats and hang them up please,” I told them.

  “They sound like they had a lot of fun,” she said with a smile.

  I nodded. “They did.”

  “And you?” she asked.

  I smiled. “I enjoyed myself. It was very quiet there. I never realized how noisy my life is until we got there. Going to sleep was a little difficult because it was so quiet and so dark.”

  She laughed before adding the cookies to a plate and carrying it to the table. “I used to like going to the mountains with your father. We didn’t do it nearly often enough. It w
as always like there was something more important to do. I wish we would have focused more on living than all the things we thought we needed to do to enjoy retirement. That didn’t work out well for him.”

  “I’m sorry, Mom,” I said. “I know you miss him.”

  “I do miss him, but I’m okay. I just get in these moods. I get so angry about all the things we didn’t do when we had the chance. I hope you will learn from my mistakes and really live. Don’t wait until the time is right and don’t wait until you’ve done the dishes and the laundry. Live!”

  “Nanny, we got to see birds and go for a nature walk and Gabriel said we can go back,” Autumn said, coming back into the dining room.

  “Gabriel let us sleep in his cabin,” Hazel added.

  My mom looked at me, both brows raised. “Pardon me?”

  “Gabriel is the owner of the retreat,” I quickly explained. “The original cabin we were given only had a single twin bed. All the other cabins were booked, so he gave us his cabin.”

  “He lives there,” Hazel said.

  “Wow, that was very generous,” my mother said, taking a seat at the table. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a person being quite so hospitable as to give up his own bed. Did Gabriel’s wife agree to this?”

  She looked at me when she asked. It was that look she would give me when I was a teenager going out with a boy. “Gabriel doesn’t have a wife,” I answered.

  She smiled. “I see.”

  “Gabriel said we can go back in the spring when all the birds are there,” Hazel said excitedly. “He says it is really pretty and we’ll like it.”

  “And he said we can roast marshmallows if we’re really careful with the fire.”

  “It sounds like you guys spent a lot of time with this Gabriel,” my mother said.

  Autumn bobbed her head up and down. “He was really nice. We had breakfast together and dinner. It was so much fun. I like him.”

  My mother was looking at me. “Was there anyone else there?” she asked sarcastically.

  “Yes, Mom,” I said, feeling the lecture coming on.

  “There was lots of people, but they were no fun,” Hazel told her. “Kassie came and we got to hang out with her some.”

  I was so glad they had already been asleep when I had gone for my late-night visit to Gabriel’s. I couldn’t imagine how my mom would have taken that news. She’d give me that discerning look, clucking her tongue and wagging her finger at me.

  “I see,” she said again. I thought about getting up and leaving before she could say what she really wanted to say, but then she would think I was guilty.

  The girls finished their cookies and went into the playroom Nanny had set up for them. My mother looked at me, a question in her eyes.

  I shook my head. “Don’t say it,” I warned.

  “What? Can’t a mother inquire about her daughter’s love life?”

  “There isn’t a love life and you know it.”

  “It wasn’t just the girls that had a good time,” she said with a smile.

  “I already told you it was nice. It was a little too short, but I’m happy we got to do it.”

  “And this Gabriel? Did you and he have a good time?”

  I groaned. “Mom, don’t. He was the owner of the place. It’s very small and he talked to everyone.”

  “Ah, but he didn’t have dinner with everyone and I doubt he took everyone on private nature walks,” she said. “Is this man young, old?”

  “He’s probably in his thirties,” I answered.

  She nodded. “Handsome?”

  “He is attractive,” I admitted.

  “You like him,” she stated.

  “Mom, I got to know him for a whole five minutes. I don’t fall in love so easily.”

  “I don’t think the girls would be sad if you did. They seem to be rather enamored with him.”

  I shrugged. “He was nice to them.”

  “Would he make a good father?”

  I nearly choked on the bite of cookie in my mouth. “Mom! I’m not even thinking about that! Sheesh! I just barely got out of a marriage. I’m not looking for anything.”

  “That marriage was over a long time ago. You’ve been on your own for two years. That’s plenty of time to move on. Trent certainly has.”

  “I’m not going to bring a man around the girls, not yet. They don’t need the confusion of a man coming into our lives and then leaving. I want to give them stability.”

  I got up from the table and put the empty glasses into the sink.

  My mom got up and came into the kitchen. “Like I’ve said, life is too short to follow the rules and worry about what might happen. You have to live while you can.”

  I knew she spoke from a place of love and she had been on the “life is short” kick since my father died of a heart attack that no one saw coming. “I know, Mom. I will. It’s just not the right time.”

  She gave me a hug. “Sometimes, we don’t get to pick when the right time is. Things happen for a reason. You can fight it, or you can choose to go with it and see where life takes you.”

  “We’ll see,” I said, making no commitments.

  I collected the girls and set off for our own house. I pulled up to the brick house that I had once shared with Trent. It was old and could use the services of a handyman to fix the many little things that were in disrepair. They would all have to wait.

  I ushered the girls inside, ordering them to unpack the suitcase and haul everything to the laundry room. I went into the kitchen to take care of the dirty dishes that had been left in the sink on Friday morning. As I rinsed and loaded the dishwasher, I thought about Gabriel. My thoughts drifted from him to my mother’s advice.

  Even if I did like Gabriel and wanted to have a relationship, I couldn’t see how it would work out. I wasn’t interested in a weekend relationship. He lived at the retreat and I lived in town. He talked about trekking into the forest for a few days to get away from it all. What would that mean for us?

  I couldn’t have a boyfriend that was only around once a month. Then again, it could be a way for me to have him in my life without it being serious. The girls wouldn’t get used to him hanging around, and when things fizzled out between us, it wouldn’t be a big deal. He would drift out of our lives and they would forget all about him.

  I couldn’t believe I was entertaining the idea of seeing him again. I knew better. I knew it would never work. I didn’t want to get into something and have it end. I didn’t want to be hurt. Trent’s betrayal had cut me in two. I wasn’t sure I could live through that again. I knew I didn’t want my girls to have to see me like that again.

  I felt like I had done a good job insulating them from the turmoil that had come from Trent walking out on us, but there was no way they couldn’t have felt some of the tension and strain. It had been a real struggle and we were just now rebuilding our lives. I was afraid to risk the progress we had made together.

  Gabriel was a great guy, and I was sure he would make someone a lovely boyfriend, but I was not in the market for a man. I wasn’t sure I would ever be ready for that kind of thing again. I was certainly going to miss the sex though.

  Chapter 15

  Gabriel

  We roamed the aisles of the Home Depot in Portland, picking up needed supplies for general upkeep at the retreat. Leo picked up a huge pack of batteries and put it in the cart I was pushing.

  “We need to invest in more rechargeables,” I told him.

  He scoffed. “It never fails, the guests take the flashlights with them. We’d be sending those rechargeable batteries along with the flashlights they steal. It’s cheaper this way.”

  He had a good point. “Maybe we can wait until after the first of the year to buy some of this stuff,” I said. The cart was full. It was stuff we needed, but damn, I hated putting out the money. “We don’t have anything booked for a couple of weeks.”

  “May as well get it now while we’re here,” he said, picking up another pack of
LED flashlights.

  “I wish they would bring their own flashlights,” I complained.

  “It’s part of the cost of doing business. I need to get a couple of tarps for the woodpile. It’s exposed on that one end.”

  I followed behind him as he walked through the store. We worked well together. I was grateful to have him as a friend and partner. We passed the flooring aisle and I couldn’t help but look. I had been eying some new flooring for my cabin for a while. “I want to get some prices on this vinyl,” I told him.

  “For the presentation?” he asked.

  “Yes,” I answered, steering the cart down the aisle.

  We spent the next ten minutes talking about colors and durability. I snapped a couple of pictures with my phone to refer to later before moving toward the tarps. With our shopping trip for supplies finished and my truck loaded with all the things I needed to make minor repairs, we drove to a restaurant to grab lunch.

  “Have you talked to her?” he asked as we scanned our menus.

  “Talked to who?” I asked, knowing exactly who he was talking about.

  “I take it that’s a no,” he said.

  “She hasn’t called and I’m not going to stalk her. It is what it is. She made it very clear she didn’t want anything. I have to respect that.”

  “What’s her story?” he asked.

  I shrugged. “I don’t know. We didn’t exactly talk much.”

  He chuckled. “I suppose not.”

  “It’s cool. I need to focus on this presentation. Assuming it was even real.”

  He grimaced. “Haven’t heard from him either, huh?”

  I shook my head. “No. I did check out the group he said he was with and they are legit. If he doesn’t reach out in the next week, I’ll call him. That money could be a game-changer for us.”

  “Good. Be aggressive. Show some initiative. He’ll probably like that.”

  I laughed. “He’ll like it or write me off. I guess I have a fifty-fifty shot.”

  The waitress came by and took our orders. Leo looked at me and I could see there was something on his mind.