Say You're Mine

by Alexis Winter

  “I love him.”

  “I know.”

  “But I can’t have him.”

  “Why not?”

  It’s such a simple question, but the answer isn’t. It’s the one I’ve been trying to come up with for the past five days in this room.

  Nothing about Kalum and me was ever easy. Not even when we were just two people flirting in the bar.

  “He doesn’t feel the same way. Or at least, I don’t think he does. Even when he did try to tell me how he felt, he would never come out and say it. The signals he’s given me are just too fuc—um, I mean, messed up, to decipher.”

  “Maybe he’s just not good with his feelings.”

  “Oh, he’s not. Which is frustrating as all hell. But then there’s another woman, which confuses me because I never even suspected anyone else. Wouldn’t I have had a suspicion? But now it hurts being around him, like there’s this void because we aren’t together. And he’s friends with Annabelle’s fiancé, so he’s going to be part of my life whether I like it or not. It’s just . . . it’s so hard, Dad.”

  “The great loves aren’t easy, Victoria.”

  I love it when he calls me by my full first name. But that also means he’s about to get real with me.

  “Tori, you have always been my strong daughter. Don’t get me wrong, what Scarlett is doing with her life, being a single mom, living away in the city to make a life for herself, is a special kind of strength. But you, my sweet girl, you could take on the world and not need any help. But that also means when it comes to your heart, you are especially guarded, because you don’t want to get hurt. So just the fact that you needed to come up here to put yourself back together tells me that this man is special, because he cracked your walls.”

  I nod, fighting back the tears as my dad’s words hit me hard. “He obliterated them.”

  “Don’t you think you owe it to yourself, and maybe him, to try to talk this out again? It sounds like there are some things that were left up in the air.”

  “I tried, Dad. I went and said goodbye to him before I left, hoping that he would finally open up completely to me. And I poured my heart out. I told him I loved him. He didn’t say it back. And he let me go.”

  “What if you tried again?”

  I shake my head, wrapping my hands around my waist, needing to feel like I’m trying to keep myself together.

  “No, I can’t. I can’t get my heart broken again. He’s already broken it three times. Only a fool would allow a fourth to happen.”

  “If he does, I’ll kick his ass.”

  My laugh spills out of me. I can’t help it. Just the image of my father, all of 5-foot-8 and fresh off a heart attack, trying to kick Kalum’s 6-foot-2 muscular frame, is quite hilarious.

  “Thanks, Dad, but I don’t think that will be necessary.”

  “Well, it might be. He’s downstairs and looks scared as shit to face you, so as I see it, anything can happen. I’ll go warm up just in case.”

  46

  Kalum

  How long has he been up there?

  When I showed up to Tori’s parents’ house today, having left the station this morning and driving straight to Wisconsin, I was prepared to do whatever I needed to do to get her back. I wasn’t leaving without her.

  I had my speech prepared, ready to tell her all the things I never got a chance to, hoping that it was enough for her to give me a second chance.

  But I didn’t expect to have to beg to her father first.

  That man might’ve just had a heart attack, and probably hasn’t been to a gym in a few years, but he’s the father of the girl I love, which means he’s scary as fuck.

  Thank God Maverick or Jaxson didn’t come up here with me. They would never let me live down the 30-minute groveling session with her father before he even let me in the door. He even asked what my intentions were with his daughter. Who still asks that?

  But I told him. My intentions are to beg for her forgiveness. To tell her everything, so for the first time, we will have no secrets between us.

  I want to tell her that I love her.

  And eventually, hopefully, I want to ask her to marry me.

  If the tear that formed in the corner of his eye was any indication, I passed the test, which granted me access inside his home. He told me to wait in the living room so he could go get her.

  That was nearly 30 minutes ago.

  To say I’m freaking out would be an understatement.

  What if she doesn’t want to see me? What if she decided that she doesn’t want to come back to Chicago? What if I’m too late?

  “What the fuck do you mean he’s here?”

  Ah, there’s my girl.

  I stand up, bracing myself for the tornado I’m sure is about to storm down the stairs.

  Here goes nothing.

  “You!” Tori jumps past the last two steps, getting to me more quickly than I expected as she shoves a finger into my chest. “What in the actual hell are you doing here? What part don’t you understand about me needing to clear my head? Are you here to kiss me again and then tell me good luck with my life? Cause guess what? You’ve already done that. I don’t need a repeat performance.”

  I must look like a madman, because as the love of my life is screaming at me, all I’m doing is smiling.

  “I see this is going about as well as I expected,” her dad says, finally making it down the stairs. “I’ll be back on the patio with your mother. Let me know when you two have made up. I want to hear about that Shelby Mustang, Kalum.”

  “We aren’t making up, Dad!”

  “Will do, Jack!”

  She whips her head around to me with a shocked look on her face. “How dare you call my dad by his first name and act like you’re old friends!”

  “We are. We go way back. And I see where you get your spunk from. He’s a good guy, Tori. And I think he likes me.”

  “He’s on a lot of medication. It’s making him dumb. But you need to leave. I don’t want you here.”

  I shake my head, sitting back down on the sofa. “I’m not going anywhere. Not until you hear me out.”

  “You had your chance, Kalum. I came to you before I left. What’s changed in five days that all of a sudden you think you can come in here and talk your way back into my life?”

  “Well, I’m done working with Amanda and the police to bring down a car-theft ring that had me stealing cars again and letting a gang use the garage as a chop shop. But other than that, nothing much.”

  I’m tempted to look at a clock so I can note the exact time I stunned Tori Brennan into silence, because it might be the first and last time this ever happens.

  I don’t know how long Tori doesn’t speak, but I’m pretty sure I waited longer for her to come downstairs. She finally sits on the sofa next to me and I can see the wheels turning in her head.

  “Okay, I have a few questions. I’m sure I’ll have more, but these are off the top of my head.”

  “You can ask me anything.”

  “Watch what you ask for, West.”

  “Anything you want, gorgeous. I’m an open book.”

  “When did you get involved with the gang?”

  “Short answer? About five months ago. It’s a very long story that involves Maverick, old evidence, and Amanda—who’s a detective—needing my help. I’ll tell you all about it when we’re back in Chicago.”

  “That part is not promised yet, but I’ll move on. Are you done with bringing down the ring? Is it over? For good?”

  “Yes. I let them use my shop because we thought at first it would be enough for Amanda to arrest them. I had to steal one car after we realized using my shop wasn’t enough, but the police knew about it. I’m done. Forever this time.”

  She nods, processing my words.

  “Amanda. I need to know all about her.”

  I tell her everything. I don’t know if Tori really needed to know that Amanda was in fact the first girl I ever kissed, but I tell her anyway, because
I never want to hide another secret from her again.

  “So she and you . . . you were never . . .”

  I take her hand in mine, tired of being in the same room with her and not touching her.

  “No. During all of this, pretending to be with her in front of you was the absolute hardest thing I had to do. That I’ve ever done. It gutted me, Tori. I hated doing it to you, but I needed you to be safe.”

  “Was I not safe?”

  Shit.

  I might not want any secrets between us, but I did want to shield her from this.

  “Toward the end, the gang knew you were involved with me. And I had to make sure you were okay. So that’s why we paraded Amanda in front of you, hoping you’d distance yourself from me. Though I never thought you’d come back to Wisconsin, it gave me peace of mind knowing that you were far away from the city when this went down.”

  “When did it go down?”

  “Last night.”

  “Last night? Kalum! Did you steal a car and come straight here?”

  I laugh, because though she hasn’t said the words yet, I feel her slowly coming back to me.

  “Not exactly. I stole a car, almost got shot, went to jail, got released, then came here.”

  She shakes her head, probably not fully processing what I just said. “We’ll go back to that whole almost-being-shot thing later. But I have one more question that you haven’t answered.”

  She doesn’t ask right away, and in this moment, I’m seeing the girl from the reunion. The scared, vulnerable girl who puts my heart in a vise every time I see her.

  “Why are you here?”

  Though I don’t need any time to prepare my answer, I take a second and place a kiss on her lips. Just a small one—full of promise, hope, and a future.

  And love.

  “Because I love you, Tori Brennan. Because since the second I saw you, I knew there was something about you I couldn’t stay away from. Because I want you by my side forever. Because I want to tell our friends how crazy I am about you and give Jaxson and Annabelle some competition in the PDA department. But mostly because when I think about my future, I can’t imagine you not in it. I love you, Tori. Please come back to Chicago with me. Let’s start again.”

  My words hang in the air, but she hasn’t pulled away from me. That has to be a good sign, right?

  “I’ll come back with you. On one condition.”

  “Anything.”

  “That when we get back, I’m cashing in on the last bet. If you really love me, you’ll wear a Packers jersey to the bar.”

  “I’d hoped you’d forgotten about that,” I say with a smile, but the truth is I’d become a Packers season ticket holder if it meant I got this girl back.

  “Not a chance. Time to pay up, West.”

  I lean in to kiss her—simply because I can. She’s mine. And I’m never letting anything get between us ever again.

  “I can’t wait for a life full of bets with you.”

  “I can’t wait until the time you finally beat me.”

  Neither can I.

  47

  Tori

  Just like Kalum had promised my dad, we let my parents know that we’d made up. Which was about 10 minutes after we actually did, because I needed to kiss the shit out of my man.

  Because that’s what he is. My man. My love. My forever.

  I still have a ton of questions for him. But now, he’s back. And not just physically, but mentally. And it’s been amazing.

  That’s what I realized later that evening, as he was long asleep after informing me he hadn’t slept after that whole car-stealing, being-in-jail thing. The whole time we were together, he was carrying the weight of this secret. It was like he was leading a double life, trying to do both what he knew was right, and what he wanted to do. And many times, those worlds and lines blurred.

  I’d be exhausted too.

  Considering I wasn’t supposed to be back for another few days, and he didn’t know how long it would take to beg for my forgiveness, we didn’t feel bad about not coming straight back to Chicago. After one last homemade dinner—on my dad’s approved diet list, of course—we got on the road and made it about halfway to Chicago, where we found a hotel in which we could lose ourselves for the next few days.

  We knew we had a lot to say to each other, and a lot of things to talk about. And selfishly, we wanted just a little more time alone. We might not be sneaking around anymore, but we aren’t quite ready to debut as a couple.

  I don’t know what time I finally fell asleep, but for the first time in what felt like forever, I didn’t cry myself to sleep.

  When I wake up the next morning, I’m definitely not crying.

  “Good morning, gorgeous,” Kalum says, pulling me into him and placing kisses on the back of my neck. “I think this is what I missed the most.”

  “Mmm, you missed kissing my neck? Because that’s weird, since I missed that too.”

  “No, pretty girl. I missed waking up next to you. Getting to hold you first thing in the morning.”

  “You don’t have to kiss up to me anymore; I told you I’ve forgiven you.” I might play off his words, pretending they don’t affect me, but inside I’m squealing like I’m 12 at a Backstreet Boys concert.

  “If you’ve really forgiven me, then maybe we can do that thing you said you’d never do?”

  I turn over, needing to look him in the eyes for this one.

  “Kalum, I love you. I have forgiven you and understand why you did what you did. But let me say in no uncertain terms that even if it’s your dying wish, I will never, ever do that.”

  He chuckles, bringing me in for a playful kiss.

  “So you say. But one day, I will get my wish.”

  “Keep dreaming, buddy.”

  Our playful kisses quickly become deeper and more passionate. Except for the few minutes we stole at my parents’ house yesterday, we haven’t had a chance to properly make up.

  And if I do know one thing about being with Kalum, it’s that makeup sex is the best sex.

  Unless it’s Camaro sex.

  “I’ve missed you so much,” his words are all but a whisper as tries to kiss every possible inch of skin he can find. “Do you know how much I’ve missed you?”

  “Yes, because I’ve missed you more.”

  “Not a chance.”

  His lips continue their journey, and all I can do is lie back and enjoy it. I can’t imagine another man kissing my body the way Kalum does. It’s not just kissing. It’s claiming. Every time his lips find a spot on my skin, I’m branded.

  “I need to taste you, Tori. I’ve almost forgotten what you taste like.”

  “Yes.”

  It’s all I can say as he buries his head between my legs. He licks and nibbles, kisses and sucks, and I’m about ready to combust. This man’s tongue is a gift I never want to return.

  “More, Kalum. I need more.” I’m moaning and grabbing his hair while my hips buck into his tongue. It’s too much and not enough all at the same time.

  And just as I’m about ready to explode, he stops. I’m lightheaded from the near-orgasm and can barely lift my head to see why in the world he would stop.

  “Kalum, I was so close! Baby, I need to finish.” I know I’m begging, but that’s what he’s reduced me to.

  “We’ve been apart for too long, Tori. I’m not about to let you come anywhere except on my cock.”

  Who am I to argue with that?

  Before I know it, Kalum is sheathed and thrusting into me with a force I’ve never felt before. It’s like he couldn’t go one more second without being inside me.

  And he feels like heaven.

  “I want to go slow, Tori, but I can’t. I need you too much.”

  “Yes, Kalum. I need . . . AAAAAAHHHHH!”

  And there it is. The spot that Kalum found, and I would bet my life he’s the only man who will ever be able to find it. Not that I’d want anyone else to try. He’s so deep inside me, it feels like we�
��re one. And he hits it every time. I love it.

  I love him.

  His thrusts become faster, harder, and I’ll take everything he wants to give me. My legs are spread for him, allowing him the room to thrust at the pace he wants, which is fast and hard and magnificent.

  “Baby, I’m coming soon.”

  “Yes. Yes. Now, Kalum. I can’t hold—”

  And I don’t. I’m tumbling over the cliff and seeing stars in the process. Kalum follows a second later, pumping furiously into me as his orgasm spills into the condom.

  Before I can catch my breath, he collapses on me, both of us exhausted from the lovemaking, and the last 24 hours.

  Hell, the last few months.

  “I love you, Tori. I love you so fucking much it hurts.” His arms are now cradling my head, and I’ve never felt safer or more protected in my life.

  “I love you too, Kalum. Forever.”

  Epilogue

  Kalum-Six months later

  “Never have I ever skinny-dipped?”

  Yes, we’ve all been friends now for over a year. Annabelle and Jaxson are married. Tori and I have been officially living together for the last three months. It’s safe to say we know pretty much everything we need to know about each other.

  But I insisted on playing tonight.

  “When are we going to be done playing this game?” Scarlett asks, wiping her mouth after having to take a drink. “Don’t we know all the embarrassing shit we need to know about each other?”

  “Oh, come on! It’s fun!” I say. Then again, I haven’t had to take a drink yet. “Also, we need to find out shit about Amanda and Ben. They have catching up to do.”

  “I’m really just fine telling you guys things about me without having to take a drink,” Ben says, probably a little tipsy because apparently Preppy Ben wasn’t exactly a choir boy in high school.

  “And weren’t you the one who not that long ago said this game was, and I believe the exact quote was, ‘fucking ridiculous’? Yes, my dear brother, I believe that was you,” Mav teases.