You'll Never Believe What Happened to Lacey

by Amber Ruffin

  You made it! You made it to the end of a crazy book about the experiences of one tiny lady. Again, I’d like to say this is not every experience and it is not a lifetime’s worth of stories. And, with that said, isn’t it waaaay more than you expected? Even me, knowing most of these stories before we started this book, looking back on them I’m like, “Daaaang, that’s a lot of stories!” ’Cause I can see not only the stories we didn’t have room for but also the stories that we had to leave out! It’s a lot.

  We are not into trying to educate white America, but maybe we accidentally did. Maybe white readers learned that just because your Black friends aren’t sitting you down, going over all their trauma with you, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist! Maybe you learned that racist stuff happens all the time. Maybe you’ve become emboldened to speak up when you see someone being a racist piece of shit. Maybe you’ve realized the racist piece of shit was you! I don’t know. I don’t know you like that.

  And if you’re Black and got all the way to the end of this book, thank you. Thanks for walking through these personal and silly and dumb experiences with us. I know it may have brought up some hard shit, but it made us feel heard and worth your time. We want you to know that we support you in whatever decisions you make in situations like these. It is a lot to ask people to live in a place that would treat them like this AND ask them to be in charge of fixing it. People are just trying to cope. Having said that, if you feel like hurting some feelings, do it! If you feel like fighting for what you believe in, do it! If you feel like calling in sick, do it! Write down your grievances and put them in a book! Whatever! Do you! Truly, we are all just trying to get by.

  What our secret hope is is that this book has given you the courage to never stop telling these stories. At almost every job I’ve ever had, it always got to the point that whenever people saw me coming they would say, “Here comes Lacey about to say something racist happened.” And they were right. I did. And sometimes I got fired and sometimes I didn’t. But I always did exactly what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. I would also like to say it’s sad that people feel, in this day and age, that they have to remain silent. And every situation is different, but I’d like to invite you to the possibility that remaining silent is no longer a requirement.

  Thanks for going on this journey with us. In closing, I’d just like to say: Can you believe this shit?

  Keep an eye out for our next book: Lacey’s Horrible Outfit Choices! It’ll be a picture book.

  Oh my god shut up. We mean, thank you for reading the book. It means a lot. Please take all these stories and use them.

  THE END (of racism). (Just kidding.)

  Footnotes

  1 I can’t believe it took me this long to mention Anita Baker.

  One last thing. I do not possess the ability to be embarrassed by photos, but Lacey does. So enjoy this gem from when we used to sing gospel music together!

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