The Last Virgin in Texas

by Jennifer Woodhull

  I tell Jared and Marissa I need to take care of something and thankfully, they don’t hold me up by asking me to elaborate. I can’t get to Gretchen’s place fast enough.

  When I knock on the door, there’s no answer. Her truck is in the driveway, but there are no lights on in the living room. I try the door handle and it’s locked. I pound harder. “Come on, Gretchen. It’s me. Open up. I know you’re home.”

  Nothing.

  I decide to try walking around back. Sure enough, the door off the screened-in porch out back is unlocked, and I let myself in. I walk through the house, and finally find her in her old room, at her drafting table.

  “Hey, sweetheart. I knocked but I guess you didn’t hear me.”

  She doesn’t look up. “Get outta my house, Tucker.”

  “Gretchen…come on. It’s not what it looked like. I didn’t know she’d be here, or I would’ve…”

  “What? You would’ve kept me and your girlfriend apart? So I wouldn’t see you kissing her, and you’d still be able to come over here and fuck me too?” She shakes her head. “I should’ve known better. Hell, lyin’ is basically your job, and you’re damn good at it, apparently.”

  “Gretchen, I’m not lyin’. I told you, none of it’s real. You can ask her yourself. I’ll introduce you.”

  “Introduce me? You want to introduce me to your fucking girlfriend?” Her voice cracks on the last word, and even though she won’t meet my eye, it’s clear, now, she’s been crying, probably all afternoon, and I’m the asshole that did that to her.

  I look up and notice the little watercolor print pinned to her wall. Find a man who will ruin your lipstick, not your mascara.

  Shit. Is that what I am? The asshole who makes her cry?

  I kneel beside her, but she turns away, dipping her head in the other direction so I can’t see her.

  “Leave, Tucker. Go now, or I’ll call Dillon and he’ll make you leave. I’m sure he’d like nothin’ more.”

  Would she actually call Barney Fife on me?

  “Gretchen, you can’t be serious. Come on, baby. Talk to me. We can work this out.”

  She turns, a little, and I think she’s going to look up at me. Instead, she grabs her phone, slides it open to Dillon’s number, and her thumb hovers over the call button.

  “Go, Tucker. Leave and don’t come back here.”

  I rest my hands on my waist as I breathe out a deep sigh, my eyes cast skyward. I look down at her one last time, and I know she won’t give in, so I step toward the door.

  Before I walk through it, I pause, and look back for a split second. I don’t think about the words. I don’t even know I’m about to say them. I just feel them, and they spill out.

  “I love you, Gretchen.”

  She sucks in a breath that I know swallows a sob. Still, she doesn’t say anything. Not one word.

  Just like last time.

  I pull up to the massive stone house on the piece of property Jared bought for his parents after we got paid from Mineral Deep. He built them a new place, and an even bigger, gaudier one for himself, close enough to the road for everyone to see it and wonder who lives here. If it belonged to any guy but Jared, I’d suspect they were some old dude compensating for a limp dick.

  When I hit the buzzer on the front door, Jared greets me with a Jack and Coke. “Where you been?”

  He slams the door behind me as we walk through to the den at the back of the house. I make a dent in the drink as we walk.

  “At Gretchen’s.”

  He stops, mid-stride, and raises his eyebrows at me. “Really? So…that back on?”

  “Well, it was until somebody surprised me by bringing Marissa into town.”

  Jared knows Marissa isn’t really my girlfriend, he just doesn’t know why it’s important for her to keep up the charade. I also haven’t told him everything about Gretchen and me since we haven’t talked in a few days.

  When I walk into the den, Marissa jumps up. “Are you mad at me, Tucker? You seemed mad. I’m sorry I didn’t text you. We just thought it would be fun to surprise you, that’s all.” She shrugs. “You know I’d never do anything to hurt you.” Her fingers alight on my arm and regret is all over her face.

  I toss an arm around her shoulder and give her a squeeze. “I’m not mad. You didn’t know. It was just really fucked up timing, is all. That was Gretchen’s diner we were in. She was there, and when you walked in and kissed me...”

  “Oh, shit…so she was there? Tucker, I’m so sorry! How can I fix it?”

  “I’m not sure if you can. I told her it wasn’t what it seemed like, but she won’t even talk to me.” I shake my head then take another swig. Jared takes the glass and walks over to the bar to pour me a refill. “I thought she was really starting to come around.”

  “Don’t sweat it, man.” Jared hands me the fresh glass. “You banged your old girlfriend and now you’ve got it out of your system. Now you can move on with your life.”

  I slump down onto the weathered leather sofa and cast a scowl in his direction.

  “What? You fucked her, right? I mean, otherwise, what’s the point?”

  “She’s not…she hasn’t…”

  “Wait,” Jared sets his glass down and presses both palms outward. “Wait, a minute! You’re telling me that girl is still a fucking virgin? Walking around looking like that and nobody’s had a piece? Damn.”

  I put the glass down on the coffee table and step forward, putting my finger right in Jared’s face.

  “Never talk about her that way. Never. She’s not some piece of ass. She’s the first girl I ever loved.”

  She’s the only girl I’ve ever loved.

  He puts his palms up. “Okay, man. Okay. I get it. Calm the fuck down, dude.”

  I sit, resting my elbows on my knees and run both hands through my hair. Marissa puts her hand on my back and rubs it up and down. I turn to look at her.

  “What am I going to do?”

  “You’re going to drink. Probably a lot. Then tomorrow, we’re going to go into town and meet with the camera crew, and you’re going to film three days’ worth of interviews with Barbara Banner because you’re a Goddamn legend. Then, we’re going to figure out a way to get your girl back.” She looks up at Jared. “Am I right?”

  “Sure, we will.” He nods in our direction as he throws back a slug of whiskey.

  Twenty-Four

  “Knock, knock! Anybody home?” I hear Maisie calling from the living room.

  “In here,” I mumble, trying to focus all my energy on what I’m drawing.

  “Hey,” she slumps against the door frame, slightly out of breath. When she raises her arms revealing bags of take-out food and beer it makes sense. “How you holdin’ up?”

  “I’m fine. I mean,” I cross my arms and slump back in my chair. “I will be. How could I have been so stupid, Maisie?”

  She puts the bags down on the empty chair next to my desk and wraps her arms around my shoulders from behind.

  “You weren’t stupid. You just listened your heart. I mean, that bitch is kind of a loudmouth, so not like you could ignore her.” She gives me a squeeze and I press my palm to her arm, squeezing her back. “Come on. Let’s get some food in you. Things will look much better after you slurp down some pork dumplings.”

  I have a feeling it’s going to take a hell of a lot more than my favorite, greasy takeout food to cure what’s ailing me.

  When Tucker left all those years ago, I was heartbroken, for sure. Now, though, what I was feeling, what I thought we were both feeling, was way more than a youthful crush. I thought him coming back here, for me, or so he said, meant something. Now I see it was just a way to pass the time until his girlfriend showed up. I was just a distraction until he got back to his real life. The emotion was a lie.

  At least on his side it was.

  Maybe Mama was onto something when she kept warning me that if men are good at one thing, it’s leaving.

  A couple of days later, Rebecca De
kalb walks into the diner. Her lip is curled up into a sneer as she looks at the handle of the front door, as if there’s a used condom draped across it or something. When she finally makes her way inside, she takes short, fast steps toward where I’m standing at the counter.

  “Hello. I’m Rebecca Dekalb.”

  “I remember you. We met the other day.”

  “Yes, that’s right.” She takes off her glasses and blinks at me like she’s stunned I know who she is.

  I got news for you, sister. Everybody in this town knows everybody else. You stand out like a whore in church.

  “Any-way,” the word is straight up valley girl as it leaves her lips. “I brought your check. For the photoshoot.” With a flick of her wrist, she pulls the envelope from the flat leather portfolio she’s clutching.

  “Thanks,” I reply, taking the envelope from her by the corner.

  “Okay, then.” She looks around, that same look on her face like she smells something bad, nods once, then clip-clops out of my diner.

  “So, what are you gonna do with that?” Maisie nods toward the envelope.

  I look down at the envelope which contains more money than I’ve gotten at one time for anything in my life.

  “I don’t know. It feels…tainted, or something.” I shrug. “What do you think I should do?”

  “If ya ask me,” Dodger comes out from the kitchen, grabs a glass and fills it with ice and soda from the machine. “I think you oughtta do something for yourself. Spend a weekend in San Antonio at one of them spas ya’ll are always going on about, or maybe take a cruise like that one your mamas took. You deserve it, Gretch. Hell, take this one with ya.” He crooks a thumb at Maisie. “I’ll watch the place while you’re gone.”

  “That’s sweet, Dodger. I don’t know, though. Maybe I’ll just sit on it a while.”

  I walk into the back room and put the envelope up with a thumbtack on the bulletin board above the rickety desk that functions as a makeshift office for the diner.

  As I wipe down one of the prep tables, I hear a tapping at the back door. I’m surprised when I look up and see the face smiling at me from the other side of the screen.

  Damn. I can’t seem to get away from Hollywood today.

  “Can I come in?” Jared asks as he grins at me through the screen.

  “I suppose.”

  He steps forward and puts his arms out. I reluctantly step forward, letting him drape his arms around my shoulders in a hug.

  “He’s not with you, is he?” I look from Jared to the door and back.

  “He’s not. We don’t travel as a pair, you know. I mean, I’m my own man.” His head tips downward, then his gaze slides up to meet mine from under his brows.

  “Of course you are. I’m sorry. Just a little gun-shy after the other day.”

  He rests his palm against the table and peers around into the dining room just as Maisie snaps the deadbolt to lock the front door. “Looks like you’re about to call it a day. Why don’t you let me buy you dinner? I’d like to make it up to you for the other day. If I had known, I wouldn’t have shown up like that unannounced with…ya know.”

  He sets his lips into a straight line as he tips his head from side to side.

  Maybe he didn’t know Tucker was trying to play both sides with me and her. In any case, I wouldn’t mind a change of scenery. I’m sick to death of all these TV people everywhere I go in town and staying locked up in my house another night doesn’t hold much appeal either.

  I rest my hip against the counter and cross my arms. “What d'you have in mind?”

  He steps forward and tugs at the point on the collar of my uniform as he looks down at me. “Well, if you’ll change outta that dress that smells like stale coffee and ketchup, I’ll take you to The Bistro out on Route 10, if you want. Unless you can think of someplace else you’d like better?”

  The Bistro is pretty fancy. I’ve only been there once before, and that was for Aunt Helen’s birthday a couple of years ago.

  “Deal. I need fifteen minutes.” I grab my bag and walk over to the doorway to yell to Maisie and Dodger. “Headin’ out. Night, ya’ll.”

  They call back goodnight and I walk out the back door, Jared on my heels. I turn and look him up and down.

  “I parked at your place.” He nods toward a brand-new Lexus SUV sitting in my driveway as we wait for a couple of cars to pass and walk across the pavement and into the front yard.

  That was a little presumptuous, but I suppose he knows it’s not really him I’m upset with. He didn’t knowingly do anything wrong.

  “If you’re gonna wait in my living room, I have to warn you. I have a vicious attack dog.” I turn and grin as I slowly turn the handle on the front door. His eyes narrow and he takes a step backward.

  I open the door and the jangle of dog tags announces Mr. Chips before he gets to the living room. “Hey buddy,” I lean down to scratch his head and he looks up at Jared, growls, then barks like the house is on fire.

  “This is your vicious attack dog?”

  “Don’t be fooled. He’ll chew your face off.” I glance up at him. “I’m gonna change. Back in a few. Have a seat. There’s beer in the fridge if you want it.”

  In the bedroom, I step out of my sneakers and pull my diner dress over my head. When I catch a whiff of it as I pull it off, I decide Jared is right and jump in the shower to rinse off. I find a pair of skinny jeans and slide them on with a long-sleeved, black tee with cutouts at the shoulders. I freshen up my ponytail, and as I start to step back into my Chucks, I glance down and spot a pair of black heels half poking out from under my bed and grab them instead. Sliding on my lip gloss in the bathroom, I check the mirror and decide I’m presentable enough.

  I walk back into the living room to find Jared on the sofa, drinking a longneck Broad Ripple with one eye on a clearly pissed-off Mr. Chips who is snarling at him from the far end of the sofa. Hearing me walk in, he looks up and lowers the bottle that was about to meet his lips.

  He gives me a whistle. “Damn, girl! You clean up fast.” He looks at his phone. “Five minutes to spare.”

  I casually point in Mr. Chips’ direction. “What d'you do to piss him off?”

  “No idea. He’s been doin’ that since I sat down.” He polishes off his beer and walks into the kitchen to toss the bottle. “You ready?”

  “Almost.”

  I step into the laundry room and Mr. Chips follows me. I pour kibble into his bowl and check that he has plenty of water. “Okay buddy. I’ll be back soon. Watch the house for me.” I pat his head and he wags his tail, then tucks into his dinner.

  I lock the front door and am surprised when Jared walks around to the passenger side with me. He reaches around me for the handle of the SUV and I look him up and down.

  “What?” He says as he opens the door and makes a sweeping move with his free hand for me to get inside. “Haven’t you heard? I’m a nice guy these days.”

  He smiles and wriggles his eyebrows and I can’t help but laugh. I climb inside and it is, without a doubt, the nicest vehicle I’ve ever been in. In fact, the sumptuous leather seats are nicer than most people’s furniture.

  I pull my shades out of my purse and make a fanning motion with my palm out of habit more than heat.

  “Oh, here, let me.” He reaches down and does something on the dashboard. I feel something on my ass, and it makes me jump. Jared laughs out loud.

  “What the fuck is that?”

  “It’s a cooled seat.” He looks at me over his shades.

  “You mean…like air-conditioned?”

  “Yeah, like air-conditioned.” He rolls his eyes and smirks. “Damn, you’re country.”

  I backhand him in the bicep and the fact that my fingers hit a solid wall of muscle kinda makes me uncomfortable for reasons I can’t quite pinpoint.

  “You used to be country too, ya know. Not everybody is a zillionaire like you.”

  “Just a millionaire, unfortunately.” He says on a sigh. “I might h
it the B someday, though.”

  I cock my head to the side and just stare at him. “Why in the world do you need more than what you got now? That seems kinda…I don’t know. Greedy, I guess.”

  “It ain’t about need, Gretchen. It’s about having something another guy doesn’t have. It’s about winning.”

  I purse my lips and turn to look out the window. That kind of competitiveness is not something I guess I’ll ever understand.

  Twenty-Five

  At the restaurant, Jared orders a bottle of wine and calamari as an appetizer. I’m a little skeptical, but after his country comment earlier, I try it anyway. I’m surprised that I like it, and before I know it, I’ve shoveled about a dozen of the little fried rings into my mouth and I’m on my second glass of wine.

  “I gotta tell ya, Gretchen, I’ve been giving it a lot of thought, and there’s something I just can’t figure out.”

  “And what’s that?”

  “How is it that you, out of all the girls in Shiner, are still single?”

  “Ha. Well, now that’s a question, ain’t it?” I lean back in my chair and fold my arms. “In case you haven’t noticed, there aren’t that many guys to choose from around here. Half the guys we went to school with are married with kids by now. Then, there are some older single guys, like Dillon, who’ve been married already…in his case, three times, as a matter of fact.”

  “You know there're places outside Shiner, though, right? Outside Texas, even.”

  “Yeah, I do. I mean, I date. I just haven’t found anybody special, is all.” I lean forward and rest my forearms on the table. “Don’t get me wrong. I like my life. It’s just dating…that’s been kinda complicated.”

  “Complicated, how?”

  “Well, I’m not what you’d call worldly, let’s say. When I meet somebody I like, and they find out I’m not very experienced, well, it puts a lot of pressure on people, I suppose.”

  “Hmpf. Sounds like you’re dating boys, not men.”

  Maybe he’s right.

  The server brings our main course and Jared tops off my wine glass as I take my first bite of chicken parmesan. “That is so good.”